>23 yo virgin >Been on OKCupid since 2015. >Have to

>>25125792
And no, this isn't a case of just going to an escort. It's not about being a virgin. I care more about finding someone. At least give me some damn responses. It's soul crushing.

It's really not that hard to meet people, you just need to understand that everybody is looking for the same thing, a social network.

What do you do? Pretend the internet stopped existing tomorrow, what do *you* do?

>>25125802
What do you mean? I've already said. I'm an outdoor sort of person. I've been to multiple voluntary activities. I've changed my entire persona and my activities. I used to be some sort of cringey metal head. That was many years ago. I've literally changed my entire life around for the better and still no luck.

>>25125807
Then you're not hanging out in the right circles. If you're not ugly, then it's clearly your personality. You're not clicking with people on a personal level. If you're that concerned about it, find friends first those friends lead to more people and in effect, women. It's easier to meet personal relationships in social situations like that than a club or online.

jesus christ OP quit being so fucking codependent on having a partner.

they can smell your fear from a mile away.

>>25125831
I don't even get to a stage where my personality shows through... This is how it goes, typical example:

>"Hello there, [name]

I just thought I'd message you as we seem to have quite a bit in common. Never mind the 87% match, it looks like we are both very interested in nature. I'm actually studying a degree in ecology.

Want to chat? Cheers!"

>No response.

>>25125831
Oh right, so it's my fault? I'm such a cunt because I want to have a partner? I'm so codependent and needy because I want a partner yeah? I SHOULDN'T be annoyed that everyone else has a partner and says "it's easy" when it clearly isn't?

Oh! Okay! Thanks. You've been a great help.

This isn't a case of me doing something wrong. This isn't a case of me not trying. This isn't a case of me being fat and ugly.

Ah, whatever. What's the point? What is the actual god damn point?

Fuck it.

>>25125853
>This isn't a case of me doing something wrong. This isn't a case of me not trying. This isn't a case of me being fat and ugly.
Well then what is it. Man must be all dem awful women shallow bitches.

>>25125858
Oh how tedious.

How fucking tedious.

Did I say that? Stop trying to turn my damn thread into that cliched bullshit. Not ONCE did I say anything of the sort. Stop actually trying to turn my thread into a m'lady fedora nice guy meme train.

>>25125867
You come off like someone who is quick to anger, do you think women sense that? If you aren't doing anything wrong why do you think no one answers you?

Perhaps you aren't actually that attractive or you are boring?

You say it isn't a case of you doing anything wrong so what could it possibly be.

>>25125867
There's clearly a problem. Cut and dry, if it's not them, it's you.

>>25125877
No. How could they sense that? I'm angry because of the absolute nonsense people are posting, trying to put words in my mouth and saying stuff like "it's easy" and "stop being so needy". Yeah because that's exactly the sort of thing that I want to hear and is fair...Yeah...Right.

Also, read >>25125839

So how could they tell if I was angry?

>>25125884

>>You say it isn't a case of you doing anything wrong so what could it possibly be.

>>25125878
Also this.


Don't post on 4chan if you aren't capable of dealing with people fucking around and making jokes anon. Have you never been here before?

Then what's your theory? You said you changed your entire persona, why?

>>25125897
I don't have a theory... That's the entire point. Jesus, why is it always the guy that has to soul search and go through a gauntlet to find someone? Why do we have it so hard? Oh, no wait. It's just me. Apparently this is all piss easy. Finding a partner is so god damn easy, apparently. Never mind.

As I said, I literally changed my entire appearance, stopped liking the shit I used to like (grew out of it), etc etc. I want to work outdoors... I like nature, hiking, art, folk music. I'm not a god damn obese goth. It's entirely unfair that I've had no success whatsoever.

This is what you're not getting. I don't even GET responses. Like, I don't even get a "Sorry [insert reason for not wanting to chat]". I've just gotten silence. It's soul destroying.

The truth hurts, but you're probably ugly and have too high of standards.

Either do something to improve your looks (get in insanely good shape, plastic surgery, etc.) or try settling for ugly fat chicks.

It's such bullshit because if I give up then that's easy fodder for people to say "well that's no good, you have to at least try."

BUT I HAVE BEEN TRYING. FOR YEARS. It's a god damn vicious cycle.

File: 11949267_745891822210712_1801723518497357552_n.jpg (22KB, 471x471px)

22KB, 471x471px

>>25125913
Fuck it.

And to think, actually, properly ugly people get GFs.

I'm about ready to give up fully. FUCK IT.

Just had to read to understand why you're alone

It'd be a good bait for fags but not even taking it hell

>>25125919
If thats you, you look pretty good man so its not that

>>25125926
You're thick as shit aren't you? Why on earth are you equating a random degenerate image board with how I would act around someone I would actually want to meet and talk to? Just because I'm annoyed at you fuckwits doesn't mean I'm like this in day to day life. Maybe if you gave me some decent responses.

>>25125839
>>25125845
>>25125853
You're kind of being a little bitch right now, and insecurity isn't attractive unless you're really funny with it. Don't be so formal by sending people messages with "hello there x" and "cheers" at the end. Talk like a normal person and stop caring whether you'll find someone or not, otherwise you never will.

>>25125931
It is me, hence the "fuck it." I really want to get an answer of some kind in this thread so I just went ahead and posted that image. Usually I wouldn't post.

>>25125939
> stop caring whether you'll find someone or not

GOD TIER STRATEGY, MY MAN.
HOLY SHIT. BEST ADVICE.

I actually wish I could be you. That is such sagely advice. Christ. You are my saviour. I never knew I could just DO NOTHING AT ALL and that would be my answer to finding a gf.

>>25125919
You are attractive but your whiney entitled personality is a huge turnoff. You've been nothing but bitter and attacking this whole thread despite lighthearted jokes or people genuinely trying to give advice (even if it doesn't work for you)

>>25125942
You're going about it the entirely wrong way, man.

You know the difference between you and those actually, proper ugly people that get chicks? They're acting like a slim, confident person. You're acting like a fat, ugly person. You need to stop trying to build yourself up on the perception of what you need to be to be liked and just start liking yourself. You're too bitter and you're lashing out looking for validation, but that's not what you need to be happy.

>>25125953
Take a step back and imagine it from my point of view. Really, actually, try to imagine it. I've explained my hobbies and even shown a pic of myself. I've also explained that I'm only pissed off in this thread specifically. I've reasoned everything. And you say I'm entitled.

And then I get advice such as:
>"stop caring whether you'll find someone or not".

So productive.

Keep in mind that for all you guys are saying and as much as I'm talking about this issue, in reality it plays out on the surface as:
>Send nice message
>No response

All they see is my picture (same one I put on this thread) and my hobbies.

So how in the HELL is that fair?

>>25125959
I'm not doing that though in OkCupid, am I? As I said, it's just the photo and my description and a nice message.

Holy hell this is painful.

I just hate how much of a vicious cycle it is. The fact that I've got no responses and probably will never get responses on dating sites just means I will be more and more angry which then reflect on to everything else. So despite the fact that I'm getting no results I have to man up and act like everything is fine whereas everyone is going around with the GFs and not being nearly mid twenties virgins?

>>25125967
yeah, your message is the kind of thing someone insecure sends, dude. Your profile probably is, too. It doesn't fucking matter what your hobbies are, whether you like cringeshit metal or hipster outdoors, or jock sports. You're sending shit to people like you're looking for an interview.

Don't go saying "hey you're nice" or "hello there" or stylize it in a letter format. Your problem is that you have absolutely zero charisma over text.

>>25125960

>>And to think, actually, properly ugly people get GFs.

Is what makes you seem entitled, or saying you aren't some fat goth. Hey they may not be attractive to you but they must have some decent personalities.

>>What do you do? Pretend the internet stopped existing tomorrow, what do *you* do?
>>Then you're not hanging out in the right circles. If you're not ugly, then it's clearly your personality. You're not clicking with people on a personal level. If you're that concerned about it, find friends first those friends lead to more people and in effect, women. It's easier to meet personal relationships in social situations like that than a club or online.
>>Either do something to improve your looks (get in insanely good shape, plastic surgery, etc.) or try settling for ugly fat chicks.
>>insecurity isn't attractive unless you're really funny with it. Don't be so formal by sending people messages with "hello there x" and "cheers" at the end. Talk like a normal person and stop caring whether you'll find someone or not, otherwise you never will.

All these people giving you advice and all you do is respond with snippy bitchy answers. Of course you are frustrated, of course you are angry I don't blame you on that but the way you are responding to people here gives the impression that you are angry and feel like you deserve a GF despite most people (outside of the crazy rich and attractive) when that just isn't how it works. TONS of people struggle like you do, fuck there is a thread right now going on about this very issue (the lonely thread) it's not JUST YOU, people suffer, people have issues making connection. Either you keep on trying or you give up. I don't know what else to tell you.

>>25125792
>insanely low morale, near to giving up

and yet here you are. still on okcupid 2 years later. i'd say that's quite a feat.

>>25125792
I was there.
I was 23 and a virgin and ended up fucking a friend from highschool who was married at the time. It was bad sex and made me feel shitty.
For all the assholes in the thread, it's perfectly possible that this happens just because you're more nervous and awkward than girls want.
Then you do get into rage mode because it's so fucking frustrating.
I don't have a ton of advice for you, OP. Just two points.
One, go on a quality site like eHarmony. OKCupid, POF, etc are free and so a lot of women don't value what they find there. Pay sites in years past have been ripoffs but eHarmony is good.
Two, learn about yourself, because the combination of whatever causes the lack of success + the lack of success is fucking you up. Learn how to meditate, meditate 20 min every day for a few years and you will understand what's going on inside you a lot better. It is slow and difficult but it will get you there.

>>25126006
Thank you.

>>25126019
Was getting quite sick of OKCupid. Looks like eHarmony is free to communicate, which is good.

>>25126006
Man where you trolling me? After answering loads of questions I just got a big screen that said

"We're sorry – we are unable to find the right type of people for you".

Turns out loads of people have this issue. It doesn't even let you on the website. I thought it'd be like OKCupid. I literally see "We're sorry – we are unable to find the right type of people for you" when I try to log in.

After google searching, apparently loads of people have this issue.

>>25125792
Go to Thailand.
Become sexypat.
Girls love you long time.

Online dating is genuinely, honestly, truly complete garbage. OP is just now realizing this.

>>25125939
>guy admit that he is having a hard time getting laid
>everyone attack him and call him weak

you guys are such giant faggots

>>25126099
Just kill yourself and give up now. I was in your exact same situation when I was your age and it hasn't gotten any better. I would kill myself but I'm too much of a pussy so please, do it for both of us.

:(

>>25125795
OP

What are your standards?
If you just want anybody, then you can find someone. You just wont want to spend time with them or see them naked.

>>25126099
you were born at the worst time for having a relationship.

you should wake up and realize how the real world works.
woman are prizes. this isn't about finding the "one" or just someone to cuddle with, this shit doesn't exist, it just what they sell us so we keep coming back.

the only thing that separates a good woman from a bad one is timing and opportunity.
sorry for the harsh words, hope you find someone soon.

>>25125919
You look like the sort of guy who is sewing a skin suit in his apartment, but maybe its just the soul patch and goatee.

>>25125919
>>25126661
Dude looks like Littlefinger

>>25126601
>samefagging this hard

i refuse to believe any individual could read through this thread and have anything but ill wishes for this asshole. you know if he ever did manage to trick a girl into getting into a relationship with him, she would shortly realize her mistake, dump him and he would beat her to death with a crowbar in retaliation.

>>25126831
You know, it's this sort of behavior that perpetuates the very sort of thing that you are so against.

You can't change someone's views, beliefs, or perspective on anything by simply calling them an asshole.

OP, just find social situations that fit your hobbies and interests and just don't act like everything is about sex and relationships, just be kind to everybody you meet.

Also quit doing online dating, if that's your only view of women then it's no wonder you hate them.

>>25125919
Alright dude, you look halfway decent, but you got the serial killer look.

How do we change that?
Get glasses(don't even need to have any sort of V+ on them, its decoration) it'll take away focus from the soulless eyes.

Shave.

Grow your hair a bit, and get a hitler youth haircut, no joke.

Then get yourself a wingman, be the wingman for him at some point.

Enjoy yer life.

OP sounds like a bitch.
Girls don't like bitches.
Girls don't like OP
The math checks out.

Hm, OP, I know you lack confidence, so that's hurting you. I don't know what your attractiveness level is, but I'm only slightly above average, being 28 and having youth fade some. I'm also out of shape and that doesn't score me points.

I still attract women in 2 ways outside of looks, usually, I accomplish something (professionally or academically, whichever applies to you) in front of them, or they just come up in conversations about recent events or I showcase my intelligence and insight into serious topics of interest.

By far, the best way I have is to have natural confidence and faith in yourself generally, then backing it up, and not being afraid to just say you're good at some things and ignorant of others. The confident man isn't necessarily a dominant personality, it's simply a person who believes he can accomplish what he wants. Your caliber then attracts women of similar interests and values, as your idiosyncrasies will rule out anyone that doesn't match you on their own.

>>25125792
you have to realize that women on dating sites, even the low-tier ones, are bombarded with literally dozens of messages per day at a minimum. this increases exponentially in accordance with how attractive they are. even if you're a decent looking fellow with a good job and interesting hobbies the sheer volume of options women have to sift through will always work against you. unless you're a 10/10 chadonis online dating is a scam.

Give up and fuck dudes, might not even have to throw the bar on the ground if that picture is actually you. Maybe you can find a bottom that likes your entitled personality.

>>25125792
Online dating is probably not the way to go. Women's profiles receive literally hundreds of messages from men every day, so from their perspective almost nobody stands out. So while you're by no means unattractive, not being a hunky/dreamy/whatever guy seems to severely reduce your chances.

My advice would be to mostly forget about online encounters and instead try to meet people irl. The volunteering you do could be a good start, but maybe if you develop a hobby of some sort then you can go to some local get-together for it and meet people there. However, it only really works if you’re actually interested in the hobby itself, because otherwise it’ll be obvious that you’re only out to seek women and that can be a turn-off for them.

Your situation is indeed tough, since it’s like a Catch 22, but don’t give up. Your self-worth shouldn't be dependant on being in a relationship or being a non-virgin. Try to be happy with yourself as you are, as a single person, and then any romantic feelings you develop will be all the more genuine.

(For context, I’m nearly 23, also a virgin, but the difference between us is that I’ve accepted it. I’ll make it one day, and so will you.)