depression thread whats eating at you lately? im finding it

>>24152407
Failing marriage
Unappreciative wife
Wife let herself go mentally and physically
Have one kid another on the way
Don't want to leave because undying love for my son
Work 70+ hours a week and a total of 3 jobs.
Still can't get ahead
Fear if left wife, woulsnt find anyone else.
Social anxiety, + phobia

Aspergers.

>>24152407

What's making it hard for you to connect, anon?

Another failed relationship for the 99th time for the same reasons as the rest
New job thats taken my time, my soul, my everything
no sleep
not eating as much
no breaks during the day just rush rush rush
commute is now 2 hours
no friends
nobody
smoking more ciggs
drinking more booze
just wish somebody would work with me and help me help myself


fucking 'ell m8s I swur the grind be real.

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>when you feel like you more than deserve to feel like a piece of utter shit
>catch yrself feeling a fleeting moment of happiness/enjoyment
>feel guilty
>revert to feeling like shit

>zero friends for several years now
>too depressed to enjoy my hobbies
>dick is 4.5"
>starting a job I'm probably going to hate
>failed out of college after two years

>>24152407
I'm a teacher and I'm trying to switch it up. I love teaching, but middle school fucking sucks. It's just such a shitty age to teach.

I've been applying to different schools, high schools, and haven't heard back yet from anyone. I really don't want to teach another year of middle school...

So god damn lonely, man.
Shitty fucking life.
Family issues.
Mental issues.
Just kill me already.

>>24155318
Good luck fellow anon, middle school is shit. Is there a decent private school around?

>>24152407
PMSing pretty hard, it always kicks my depression and self loathing into full fucking gear.
Im also posting about my sad self in a thread on /soc/ so I feel like thats already pretty low, do I even need to say more

>>24155378
Yeah actually. I'm in CT so we've got Xavier, Notre Dame, Choate, Hopkins...

Hmm...maybe I'll try that. That's a good idea thanks anon! Hope your eggs settle down

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tried moving away twice and my incredible lack of self-confidence let me to quit thinking everyone hated me and I was going to get fired anyway when I was actually very well-liked and did a great job. now I'm back staying with my parents. 4 years ago when I moved out I said I was going to save money and go into a two-year program at the local College and I currently have $9 in the bank, so obviously I have not said anything and that plan is still several years in the future.

I have very few friends left anymore because I drove most of them away with my retarded drunk or high bullshit

all of my problems on my own fault and now I'm almost 25 and have nothing

I hate my body
can't exactly talk to girls when I live with my mom at 25 I never touched one anyway

going through a miniature spiritual crisis, I really want to be super religious, and I do believe it but I can barely make myself follow it. I'll spend hours and hours reading scripture/theology/law and then as soon as I close the book I'm fapping to degenerate shit or mixing drinks

I know what I want for the future, I dream of marriage and children, I know the kind of life I want to live, but my own lazy hateful and self-hating mind has brought me back to the same life I had at 18, new to the world with nothing, except I was supposed to be far past this point by now

Also I wish my penis would double in size overnight

>>24155396
>choate
>chode
Anyways thanks itll be better in a week lol gl again

I want to see everyone being unhappy. I fell in love with my best friend and told her so we don't talk anymore. I think all of my friends think I'm retarded behind my back. I feel like a fraud.
It's hard to rationalize, but I really don't see a way in which I get better. It feels like a downward spiral, with me becoming more and more of an asshole

>>24155444
Bro... the first thing you need to realize is that you'll always have nothing.

I'm a teacher for fuck's sake, and I'm still eating top Ramen like a fucking college kid. I ate dinner yesterday off of tinfoil because I'm too cheap to buy paper plates and too lazy to wash a regular plate.

I've got like $1,000 in my savings account and $400 in my checking. If my bucket of a car shits out on me tomorrow, I'm hit. Like, done.

Living with your parents at 25? Bro, I work with teachers who still live with their parents at 30. Not even kidding...

It's fucking rough out there, man. Apartments are expensive. Jobs aren't easy to find. Things are really, really tough.

That being said, I feel like there are some options you may be overlooking. Can you take out student loans just to get out of there and live on campus for a while?

>>24155514
>I want to see everyone being unhappy.

I hope you mispoke, er...mistyped...

... or you're a yuuuuge asshole and deserve to be a sad, miserable little fuck for being so salty

>>24152407
>tfw no gf

I mean, I guess it's really not that bad if this is the only thing I have to complain about but man, I've not had a gf in a really long time and the only one I've ever had was an emotional leach that cheated on me.

That was 2 years ago and since then I've tried meeting people but I find that extremely difficult. I rarely meet people my own age and if I do, they never seem interested in me. I've talked to a few girls here and there but they've all either lost interest and stopped talking to me or they were crazy and I didn't want anything to do with them.

All my friends have had long lasting relationships, some are even married, yet I've only ever had one shitty failed relationship and a few dozen awkward attempts at meeting people. After several shots at okcupid and other dating sites and having those go absolutely nowhere and having never met anyone at my work seem even remotely interested in me, I really don't know what to do about it.

>>24155714
You can have mine

>>24155744
whats wrong with her?

>>24155807
She's learning to speak

>>24152407
No luck in love
Realizing even though I feel like I'm an adult, it's not the type of adult women care to date

Basically, wondering what the fuck I've been doing for the past few years.

I'm lonely.

Wishing I just took my own life.

>>24152407
Well, let's vent a little I guess
>New boss robs me of any chance I might have to actually enjoy my job, which is something I really do take pride in
>My recent promotion didn't improve things at all, since I now find myself mindlessly competing with my coworkers over who has the nicest material things
>Ex-girlfriend refuses to just leave me alone but won't consider actually speaking to me again either
>I really think I fell in love with her at one point but she ended up threatening to falsely accuse me of rape to get me off her back when I caught her cheating on me
>I'm worried I might be developing an addictive personality by trying to cope with all his through alcohol/drugs

>>24156364
>I really think I fell in love with her at one point but she ended up threatening to falsely accuse me of rape to get me off her back when I caught her cheating on me

Here is what you need to do: delete her number and never, ever talk to her again. That girl is dangerous

>>24152407
The fact that I'm on this board is already pretty indicative of how low I've sunk.

Can't connect to anyone, can't relate to anyone, future looks pretty grim after I screwed up my GPA last semester, incredibly lonely, childhood abuse makes socializing impossible, feels like everyone I talk to just wants to fuck but I just want companionship.

I also realized recently, watching everyone around me, that everyone ends up settling, and that hit me hard for some reason.

Depression moderately alleviated by the reassurance that I will likely take my life in the spring and none of it will matter.

I have 0 stress tolerance so I fucked up school

managed to graduate HS but now I'm a neet with no direction. I applied for a job a bit over a week ago, nothing back. Contemplating going on autismbux (Diagnosed Sperg, De[ression, and others)

I tried biking with friends yesterday but stomach pain kicked in early on so I had to get a fucking ride home.

Binge-playing vidya and shitposting has largely become my routine.

I've accepted that I'm going to be a perma-KV and die alone.

More mealoncholic then anything desu, and I know I'm too much of a fag to kill myself.

>>24152407

Society is entirely corrupt, and there's no vaccine. Obedience is enforced by social gargoyles. Our spirits are stripped bare and auctioned off. They get five days of labor and two more dedicated to avoiding the soul and self, perpetuating capitalism (go see a movie - watch TV - get some ice cream!) the cycle repeats itself and nobody bats an eye.

We're both victims and servants of the machine, and when was the last time I even watched the sunset? I got my dick sucked earlier today and I imagined someone else's mouth, and someone else's dick. Simulations replace stimulation until you receive stimulation and you need a simulation instead.

We are so far removed from nature. I know Orion's belt and the big dipper. I've never earned a merit bade. What side of the tree does moss grow on, again? I can google that.

There's this mechanical momma bird spewing bacon grease and fearmongering rhetoric down our throats and we're slipping and sliding just to catch every drop.

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>Pathological liar
>Make people fall in love with me
>Reveal the truth
>They never stay


I can't stop myself from doing it.

>>24152407
I walk around constantly getting close to people and then abandoning them for no reason. Also sometimes leading people on and pretending I have no clue.
I honestly don't care that I go around hurting people. I suppose that's the part that gets to me

Im still wallowing in a pit of depression, my gf of 4 years cheated on me with my best friend of 9 years.

My family is dealing with massive money issues

Middleschool dropout and i cant Get The money to get my GED

I have a job But only get 2 days of work for 8/hr and everytime i get my paycheck it goes right into food so i can survive until next paycheck, i cant spend it on anything else

My house is in debilitating state, and pretty much falling a part

Suicidal thoughts occur every day when Im.not drunk

I try to smile when really behind it Im crying for attention and help, i want people to realize i need emotional help But i get too bothered with the fact that i would just be a burden to the person i might actually meet who wants to help me

I crave codependancy, i need a relationship not just some Fuck friend but all i do is get Fuck friends

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hi soc this is my first time here because i am feeling lonely. I realized that there are many people like me. I had zero this zero that, everything zero. Nothing. But now ive jumped in mma and i aim to compete and be very good at it just to show the world that you can be anything you want. God bless, take care and work smart.

I had sex with 3 different girls today and didn't cum once.

>>24156945
You on painkillers bro?

>>24156955
Drunk threesome at the brothel and one was being a bitch and put me off, then I brought a random girl I met tonight to my place and she started crying and left half way through because she has a boyfriend and felt bad. Such is life.

>>24156974
Damn bro you're a savage lol