/sad/ Are you lonely? depressed? In a bad spot in life? Let

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>>22997821
>>22995661

so, anon who likes cats, I'm afraid I may be a bit late, but happy birthday to you anyway
here's a birthday card

plz disregard my subpar touchpad drawing skills

Just down in general. Have been for years. Kik= thewildchild4life

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>>23007558
been trying really hard to replace the need to add random girls off /soc/. same thing with my best friend. we're both tired of this stupid game of looking for "the one" and ending up being losers and ostracized, but then again we both know that we deserve it.

the worst part is we CAN find girls but if it's not a problem with us fundamentally, it's a problem with them.

take it from two dudes who collectively dated twenty girls in the past two years online. it's not worth it. stop trying. you're just hurting yourself.

getting into music and my friend getting into obscure vidya has helped us re-focus this need into more positive things... but it's not that easy.

anybody else feel this way or follow through with this behavior? p.s. me and my friend are both sort of "recovering" from breakups that by this point have shaped our personalities - hence why we tried a bunch of different "rebounds"

kik penfan88

I am here if you wanna talk

Got two hours of sleep. Haven't eaten in a day. Self harmed for the first time in months.

You could say I'm hitting a low patch. It might not get better this time

I feel like there is no way out, I'm trapped in this prison of my own making. Been clinically depressed for 6 years now, can't remember what feeling happy was like. I turned to drugs like many people do, but in the end it made me even worse. Attempted suicide but failed, you know you suck when you can't even kill yourself right. Got clean a year ago and actually believed that it will get better, but I realized that reality is so boring. Can't drink so weekends are pretty uneventful. I just can't escape this feeling that I am being punished for all the shit I've done, that maybe I deserve this. Every night I go to bed and pray I don't wake up, I've tried forming connections with people but I'm just so empty that sooner rather than later they vanish. And I don't blame them, but it still hurts. Life is a strange game and I don't know how to play anymore.

>>23007622
>it's not a problem with us fundamentally, it's a problem with them
it's a problem with people in general, I guess
two people getting along well is hard to happen


>anybody else feel this way or follow through with this behavior?
Yeah, regarding girls this year has been a rollercoaster of feelings, with both cringy and good momments, idk, I felt very different towards it through the year. But I think I'm currently in a "don't care about girls gonna focus on my life plans, etc" rn, but in a good way (like, really not worrying about it and feeling motivated with a lot of stuff in life). I just hope this lasts.

rant

I'm actually doing quite decent, at least I'm doing pretty solidly. I just graduated with an AAS, blew my classes out of the water (A's, B's and just a single nagging C to fuck the whole thing up) especially considering the fact that I never studied once, just paid attention to lectures and did the fucking work when I was supposed to.

No, the thing that's got me in a mood is that I've got an exwife now that is looking to do nothing but start fights. I've moved on from our relationship (We broke up over a year ago) and it was not easy to do. I even tried staying friends with her on Facebook and shit and I was trying to move on with my life. Hell, I had thought that she had moved on. Fuck sake... she HAD moved on with her life. She had a new boyfriend two months after we split. Two cunting months after we split? HOLY FUCK!

Lo, and behold though, that just recently she's been posting shit up on Facebook trying to pick fights. Shit about how despite the fact that she's "With an Amazing guy, has an amazing family that loves her, there's still one guy that no matter what happens makes me feel disposable." And bullshit like that.

It's less about the fact that she's putting crap up like that, but that we've been split apart for more than a year! Now I finally found a girl that I like, and I'm not making a secret of it. We connected (hah) through /soc/ and we get along fantastic. It's an LDR, but we're getting along and I love it. I'm not holding back, and what happens, happens. Now it just feels like my ex-wife is being a twat and just being angry because I'm not weeping and wailing, and gnashing my teeth because she's not a part of my life anymore.

/rant

>>23007622
I know EXACTLY what you mean but I'm going to continue on down this destructive path of looking for /soc/ girls because I'm going to have to finally learn this the hard way even after 3/4 fantastic online relationships turned sour, fug your advice lmao

>>23007622
>>23007751
2015regardingGrills.txt, cause I'm bored

>break up in january
>enter an "I don't care about girls" phase
>but at the same time really bad phase with depression, life was a mess, etc
>but not worrying about girls was good
>meet cool girl online a few months after
>coulditbelove.jpg
>get job offer from company with plenty of offices around the world
>put their office in the city next to hers as my top choice
>cause coulditbelove.jpg but also because it is a really good city, so what
>get ghosted
>feels really bad for about 2 weeks
>but whatever
>enter next "I don't care about girls" phase a month or so later
>but this time feeling way better
>probably best I've felt during 2015
>pretty much just enjoy life
>meet qt3.14 at a party out of nowhere
>next day she asked her friend to ask a friend to ask a friend (...) for my number and messages me
>start talking a lot
>coulditbelove.jpg
>then she always has an excuse to not go when we schedule something
>but messages me everytime I stop talking
>saw her 3 times in 3 months
>one day she schedules something, then disappears, ignore a text, etc
>fuckthatshit.jpg
>decide I'm never gonna be all falling for a girl for months like an idiot again
>decide I'm gonna try to get the grills everywhear cause yolo
>go talk to a 10/10 qt on a bar, end up kissing and getting number
>confidenceboost.jpg
>mfw I learn the next day that she is married
>have luck with all the next girls I try
>FUCK YEAH I'M AWESOME
>suddenly can't get any
>maybe it was all a lie
>start feeling real shitty
>keep trying but no luck
>then meet a cool girl
>go on a few dates
>then meet another girl
>am really into her
>with both it was like I was enjoying it, but at the same time not worrying that much
>which is something really good
>let's see if goes somewhere with the last one

super lonely. stressed for the next year. kik; annakittybear . open for venting

It's just that time of the year. Everything just seems to suck... Shit blows.

If anyone's down to chat or if you want someone to listen to you or whatever, kik is DontTreadOnMe603 I'm usually up pretty late, if I don't reply right away I'm sleeping, but I'll hit you back

>>23007558
Skype = lailainai
Been in a rut for a while. I dropped out, can't seem to find a job, can't seem to find a woman because I'm not getting myself out to parties, and I'm just stagnating. I want to form connections, but I keep shooting myself in the foot by laying my shit out for people to see way too early. It's getting to a pretty bad point in my life.

Well, at least I haven't died yet.

>>23007969
>not going to parties
I haven't dropped out, but same boat. It's an hour drive to the campus and I never know what shit is going on because they only tell people on campus that shit and I can't be assed to jump through a billion hoops to find out on the premise that I may go and be alone in a crowd for another 6 hours and then go home more depressed than when I left.

So today
> crush is in town for x mas
> friends since high school
> since my depression got worse, I began distancing myself from her because depression do what depression do.
> invites me to Denny's with another one of our friend
>(means a lot since going to Denny's was our thing back in high school)
> decline because I'm a wageslave
> get an idea to surprise her
> get all my work done early and take my lunch break early to have room to hang out with them.
> get seated at Denny's
> same table we'd always use in high school
> no one's there
> ask to confirm the time they said they were going
> "Oh lol we ended up not going"
> I go ahead and eat there alone
> multiple servers pass by and ask if I'm okay
Guess I must've looked pretty bummed out. I know it's my fault for just jumping the gun like that, but it still hurt just sitting there realizing I was the only one who hadn't moved on to bigger and better things since high school.

Now that the venting is done, I'm all ears. How are you guys feeling?
Kik:rodrods124

>>23007558
I used to be my high school's valedictorian, got accepted into Berkeley, Davis and all my other public uni's I applied to
I flunked out of college last quarter because I forgot a scantron. I didn't take it seriously, and I messed up hard so now I have to spend a year in community college because they won't offer the courses I need next quarter. I make mistakes often, and I usually always mess up royally with something important. My lead at work gives me a tough time and calls me a clumsy idiot, but my managers respect me and think I'm a good character because of how nice I am. I've grown distant from everyone, and lots of my old friends seemed to have hated me for how carefree I always was in high school. My exgirlfriend has been sending me mixed signals for a while, but has recently said she's going to go out of state to get away from her family and the people she's met

she's been the only one who tries to understand me, and really motivates me everyday. I don't know whether to convince her to stay or leave, it feels so selfish to have an opinion on what she does

girl i have feelings for and was close with left for basic training for airforce.

i miss her

skype: deletedmoth

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JUST

I'm fucking homeless, living in my car, While studying computer science at UWM. Working but no money for food until friday. I've got nowhere to go but Ive saved up enough from work to move back on campus for winter break starting friday

I'm constantly hungry, and tired but I still keep my manly strut. Shit, it's rough though, the senpai can't help much either.

Recently broke up with gf of 4 years. I guess she expected me to get rich, she left me for a guy whos company is better established than mine. Never date a russian.

Yet I still maintain my manly strut ;]

My problems seem shit compared to everyone else but
M19 fat fuck with no job and lives with dad and still don't know how to drive
So boring even my friends stopped hanging out with me
Want to kill myself but too pussy
No skills that will help me in life
Going to school for drama degree and I'm not even that good an actor
Living off government and military Dependant benefits

Hi guys, I'm feeling pretty lonely today - sort of slipping into a dark place and really want someone to talk to. My Skype is mcflippyhoo

I was supposed to go to a mechanic to have my car seen to drive 400 miles to pick up my girlfriend and bring her to my house because she can't drive because she lost her license to a DUI. I can't do it. I don't know why the fear in me is so strong but I just can't accomplish my business.

Now she'll probably be really angry with me and I feel stupid about being in the entire situation in the first place. It doesn't feel like it's worth it anymore.

Anyway I'm sitting here doing nothing and I'm still incredibly anxious and my body hurts and I feel bad.

>>23009233
This guy right here.

Keep on moving forward, you'll get there with the outlook you have.

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Rant

I'm so sick and tired of myself. Like. How annoying do you have to be to start wanting to knock yourself out?

Can I just be satisfied with one god damn thing in my life? Every fucking success I've had (which have been many) seem tacky and seemingly not worthy of being called a "success."

What will it take for me to be satisfied?

I ask myself that god damn question everyday. I'm not lonely. I'm not sad. I feel like I should feel bad for viewing people as stepping stones, but at the same time I'm convinced that they are.

I'm probably a sociopath and if I am, it's most likely better that way... because if I ever have to get tied down by marriage and kids I'll just off myself. Fuck that way of living.

Emotions, love, and expectations are annoying and piss me off. If you cannot fucking handle the situation you are in, drop it and move on. Is thay so fucking hard? Like, really.

I get so annoyed by friendships and family. Why do they have to be so needy? I never reach out to them. I hate communicating. Just leave me alone so I can read and study. How many times do I have to say these things to them?

And as I look over everything I've said, I still dont feel bad or ashamed. The somewhat alive conscious I have in me tells me I should, but I'm tired of pretending and acting.

Fucckkk everythinggg....

I lost most of my friends due to mental illness during college and slightly after college. I've tried to reconnect with a few of them, but it hasn't worked out. The thought of meeting with them kind of frightens me because I'm embarassed about the way I acted and want to put it in the past.

I'm 27 and stuck in an expensive city with a low-paying job and no prospect of moving out of my parent's home while most of my high school friends are attending Ivy League schools or being generally successful.

>tldr: first world problems.

I'm 24, sad and lonely and i just want a girlfriend. I've never had been in a relationship of any kind because i'm socially awkward to the point where i spend my free time inside my apartment. I'm relatively good looking, financially stable(got a job as a bartender believe it or not) but with almost zero confidence when it comes to women.
It doesn't help that i live on an island and have no real friends to speak of so i have even less of a chance to meet people i like.
The sooner i get enough money to buy an apartment in Toronto, the better.

Can i get a hug?

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>>23007558

Girlfriend left me a few months ago. Been dating since then but nothing seems right. Seems like I'm looking for her in every girl I meet. I can't motivate myself to get any work done, and I've given up on school.

Pushed all my female friends away, and I'd just love to have a girl to talk to again

kik: 4lbatross

I need to vent

I'm feeling burned out. I have been in a stable relationship for the last year and I just want to end it. I feel miserable and I can't get over the relationship before that which ended nearly 3 years ago.

Kik: mr.d.BadGuy

>>23010967
have a man hug anon.

you're gonna have go do stuff and meet ladies if you want anything to happen. Doesn't have to be cool kid party stuff, just go to a place and do a thing where other people are doing things. Volunteer for something in your town, maybe. Ladies dig volunteer firefighters, and if you get involved in the community you will meet a lot of people, some of whom will be ladies.

basically you gotta decide which you like better, sitting at home by yourself, or having a lovely lady. Whichever one you choose, there will be times when you wish really hard for the other thing. that's life eh?

good luck. or better, go work your balls off to get what you want and you won't need any luck.

>>23007671
it'll get better.

Here is a recipe for a better day:
go to a gym and do a few squats, deadlifts and benchpresses.

go home and drink a chocolate milk.

read a chapter of anything written by mark twain.

send a text to someone you haven't talked to in awhile.

thank me later.

Trap i used to know hates me now, been starving myself also. Lifes a bit of a mess and the loneliness is just making me into a pussy.
I need a buddy.
Kik: hololcaust

You all sound like decent people in bad circumstances who are understandably sad but still deserve to be happy, even without changing yourself. Not currently depressed but I've been there, it sucks and I have no real advice apart from trying different things. Medication worked for me. This also sounds good:
>>23011251

I'm happy to give advice/perspective but I know how obnoxious that shit can be when it's unsolicited. Just ask. Keep in mind that I'm also just one person bouncing my way through life, sometimes with great success and sometimes with really miserable failures. Not going to fuck about with kik today because I'm already too distracted.

>>23010812
Functioning sociopaths are not only a thing, but they are often extremely successful people. Surgeons, CEOs, etc.

>>23010967
Well on the bright side being a bartender you will be able to talk to people

i need to come up w $400 hahaha

>>23007558
I'm sad. My BF just broke up with me. Don't send dick picks please.

abbiemomo

I think I'm having a midlife crisis at 24 :(

I am recovering from a serious health problem that nearly killed me. I live in a treatment facility in the middle of fucking nowhere. I will not get see my family or friends on Christmas.

I can't walk or speak well. My memory is spotty. The person I was in love with left me when I got sick.

>>23013419
Fuck, dude.

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>>23011251
I tried. I have no time nor motivation

>grandmother died 3 days after birthday on december 6
>had to put dog to sleep today

This world is not for me, going to end it all really soon

>>23013419
>The person I was in love with left me when I got sick.

Then they weren't worth your time. There will be others.

i have borderline personality disorder, not self-diagnosed like a tumblrfag but like a medical professional told me
and i'm just so tired

some days are perfect and magical and amazing and other days are just fucking okay and i do fine and i get through and bad things happen but i deal with them okay

and then other days i am so so so sad
so sad
sometimes for no reason and other times because something minor has happened that i cannot cope with
and i am just so angry and frustrated and i wish it could all stop, i'm mad that i'm like this, i'm mad that i've hurt so many people over the years before finally learning what is so fucking wrong with me, and i'm glad i know because now i know how to deal and how to manage myself and my emotions and not hurt the people i love so much

but i wish i could just be stable and normal and sane
i don't want to have to fear a downward spiral every time i have a sad day
and i wish i could stop drinking so much to cope
i'm young and i have so much potential and i could do so much better than i am but i have no basis for what is better or worse because i'm always so hard on myself that even if i'm doing well i'm not happy with myself

i'm just so tired
all the fucking time
whether i'm experiencing some supernatural high or i'm briefly experiencing normal basic emotions or i'm the saddest anyone has ever been in their whole lives as it always feels
i just want a break.

i come on /soc/ and project this perfect magical personality and i do the same thing in real life, i am a real life fucking magical girl, i am a manic pixie dream girl, i am everything all at once
but in my head i'm a hurricane
and i know that i'm having a break right now and there's nothing i can do to stop it other than take some fucking ativan but i don't want to do that, i don't want to sedate myself into comatose and baseline functions, i just want to exist as i am and i can't do that without being in anguish

i want to be the girl that i project to everyone around me, that everyone loves so much, but it feels impossible, like everyone is better than me and i'm just an imitation, i'm fake butter, i'm plastic flowers, i'm a chinese sweatshop black market louis vuitton

i just want my head to be clear but everything is moving so fast right now and i can't stop i want to stop i'm so fucking angry about so many things and i just want people to love me but how the fuck can anyone love me if i don't love myself? if i seek validation from strangers on 4chan or people in real life, if i need everyone to adore me before i can love myself, how will i ever feel okay?

i've never broken up with anyone before and i don't know what to do i miss them so much

i miss good night texts i miss pestering them for love even if they were shitty towards me sometimes i don't care it's okay i don't mind i know i'm just freaking out but i don't feel like i'll ever meet someone who i can mesh with so well and it makes me really upset even if they were slightly abusive towards me at times and rude i don't feel like i even deserve any better it hasn't even been a week but i'm trying so hard to get over it because i have work and i don't want it to distract me at work but i can't stop randomly crying whenever i'm not doing something and it hurts so much

it hurts so much to love someone so much and not know what to do to fix things

it hurts me so much they said i still care about you i'm proud of you i'm proud of how far you've come but i'm so lonely i just its like i lost my one friend and now i'm all alone my soxial anxiety pushes people away and i'm so scared i'll never find anything again

we were together for 2 and a half years you cant just blindside me like this anf you seem okay about all of it which upsets me even more

i wish i could get through to you how much i love you
i don't know what i could do to make you understaqnd

>>23013812
>>23013843
bpd is a real bitch, fuck ativan and all other benzodiazepines for that matter. They just erase you until one day you look in the mirror and don' recognize yourself anymore. And the withdrawal is soo horrible Jesus why would they give that to people. But I guess sometimes I would rather feel nothing than feeling like I'm drowning. But yeah feeling okay is a total mystery to me so I can't help you there.

>>23013812
Hang in there mate, it's going to get better. I used to feel the same way as you did for a long while, sometimes I still do.. I've been diagnosed with a lot of things by multiple specialists ranging from ADHD & Acute Anxiety Syndrome to clinically depressed and whatnot.

I see myself a lot in what you're writing, tired all the time, unable to feel emotions, young & a lot of potential.. I stopped caring about all those fancy disease names, figured most psychologists are just people with a degree that don't really know what to do with it so they prescribe drugs. From my experience, most things came from my childhood and my relationship with my parents, which was anything but stable. It took me about one year with the most amazing psychotherapist I have ever found to finally reach a stable point which I find really hard keeping onto, but I'm getting there.

Also I know a lot of people might disagree but if you have to fill a void and drinking is your solution consider filling it up with weed... Not sure about health and all but the effects it has on the human brain are not as worse as the ones alcohol has.

Bottom line: hang on in there, it's gonna get better. Find a psychotherapist. A good one, not some piece of shit asshole with a diploma that prescribes Adderall to 3yo kids. Find one that listens and understands you. You'll find out a lot of amazing stuff about yourself. The key to everything is finding motivation to a big part of that energy you waste procrastinating into doing productive stuff. You'll feel better about yourself and your future. Good luck!

>>23010967
very curious op...what island?

>>23013729
fuck thats rough. Hope you have better days.

>>23013843
Holy fuck I wish I did not relate to this.

>>23009233
Hey I was in a similar spot 2 years ago and now am a lot happier, have a job I love, starting my PhD, never found a new bf, but other than that I can honestly say you keep the hustle and everything will be okay.

I'm rooting for you
:)

>>23010812
you sound like my ex

>>23011177
Same boat now, not currently in a relationship... but not looking for one for the same reason

>>23013926
thank you, i really appreciate the kind words
i've calmed down a little probably because i'm more drunk but i'll deal with that later, thank you for commiserating

>>23013936
i understand, i try not to identify as "bpd" because i think that's shitty, i'm more than that, i'm more than the things that are wrong with me, but i know that the things that are wrong with me affect so many more people than just me. i see a therapist i like a lot, she's really great and really helpful, it's just hard because even with the support from her and my boyfriend i still have these meltdowns and i still totally break and freak out and post shit like this on /soc/ i guess y'know
i'm too ashamed/embarrassed to talk about my mental health to even my best friend, i don't want to burden her after all these years, but i just hate using the internet as an outlet for all of the terrible things in my mind. thank you for the support though. it really does mean a lot. i've tried smoking weed but it has made my anxiety a lot worse, idk if it's just a bad batch or what, i was in an environment with people i trusted but when i smoked weed the first/only time i flipped out and i hated how it made me feel and i had a lot of derealization for the subsequent week. it bums me out because i think it might be good from everything i've heard but when i tried smoking pot it was one of the worst experiences of my life
thanks again though, i'm trying really hard, i just have these moments where feel like i'm completely shattering and i'm in the middle of that right now and they are so scary

>>23014068
hi friend
i'm sorry
if it makes you feel better you probably are very loved, i know that how i feel is a delusion but it doesn't fix things, but you are most likely a wonderful person worthy of love, okay? i promise

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I'm missing her and listening to the music I wrote her while drinking.

Cheers

Add 2 group chats I guess idk

Skype - toesdidup

since im new here, i just want to hug every sad creature here.

i just had a bad relationship a year ago and now i found my girl has cheated on me. im 20 and i only had 1 gf ever since. i just feel bad about myself bc all if my friends have their gf's.

>>23014086
What are you studying, PhD brethren? Engineering here.

Since we're all sadposting: anyone else have trouble feeling attraction towards anyone? I seem to meet someone I'd like to date once every few years, max. I have no idea what my problem is.

25/M

My ex cheated on me less than a week before our 1 year anniversary. This is the second time that this has happened to me, with the other girl cheating on me after a year and a half. Both of them were severely mentally ill, but were way better in the beginning of the relationship because of my help. I'm really worried that I'm just going to repeat this cycle over and over again. I'm bald and pretty nerdy so most girls won't give me the time of day, even when I drop my standards pretty far. The ones that do are like these girls where they have a lot of mental problems, but see me as a form of salvation since I see them for everything that they are instead of just the front that they put up or for their illness, and I still accept them. It's so difficult being in this type of relationship that it feels like I put a large piece of my soul into them to try and help them through their problems, and when they betray me I can almost physically feel it being torn from me.

When the first girl cheated on me I basically gave up on life for almost a year and didn't talk to anyone except when I was working. The isolation was so bad that I forgot how to speak normally, and I still trip over words from time to time 5 years later. It took me years to get my life back on track, so I'm terrified that I'm going to go through the same ordeal. It's been less than a month and I've already taken to drinking every night, something that I've taken a lot of care to never do.

I feel like if I don't find someone who I can trust soon that a piece of me will die, never to return.

I feel like an outcast because of my autism, but I genuinely want to get better at socializing. I'm always anxious whenever I meet someone new, and I feel like my friends don't see me as one.

Just broke up wit alcoholic, mentally ill bf. Im happy i did but i already miss him and feel lonely. Despite his issues hes given me the best emotional support i've ever had. I just want to be held.

I give up.

My Ldr Girlfriend left me a few days ago without any warning I cried my eyes out. I haven't left my room in 3 days It killed me I'm probably young and naive but love seemed so good. I'm also real ugly not egg head status but pretty bad
Kik is dizzy360

>>23009233
Stop posting in threads trying to get attention. No one gives a shit you're pretending to be homeless you entitled little cunt. I was homeless for almost 2 years. I've done shit you couldn't even imagine. I wish I would've come across you back then, I would've beat the shit out of you, fucked you, sliced your throat and then taken a shit in your car. I hate fucking cunts like you that believe you're owed something simply because you were born. You have no idea how good you have it in life because mommy and daddy told you you could do no wrong and you got a trophy for shitting your pants. Everyone in this country(USA) under the age of 26 should be painfully executed.

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>found gf on okcupid in July
>was just looking for a 6'0"+ girl halfway between where I live now and where I'm moving to next year
>found cute ass girl
>6'0" exactly
>lived exactly where I wanted her to
>fucking dream come true I guess
>her profile says nothing
>"Creep on my insta"
>follow her on instagram and find that she likes Death Grips
>well this just got cool
>too afraid to message her though
>don't know what to say
>don't want to fuck it up
>she messages me first
>holy_shit.png
>we chat
>get her snapchat
>we snap for a few days
>get her number
>we text for a few days
>first date
>she's fucking perfect
>hate that feeling of "think I love her already" but I feel it
>continue dating and casually having sex with her for less than a month
>think she's perfect
>ask her to be gf
>she says yes
>month goes by
>she sees me drunk for the first time
>she almost breaks up with me over that
>back to normal
>few weeks pass by
>did some stalking because I'm an insecure fuck
>notice her OKC and POF accounts are still up
>stalk profile
>online a few days ago
>what the fucking nigger is this
>lie and tell her that while searching her tumblr name, I found that her okc is still up
>she suddenly realizes that I'm an insecure fuck google searching her online aliases
>we're in a weird spot for a week straighta
>we talk about it and get over it
>in the clear for another month

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>>23015215
>october 30th
>got buzzed with friend and drove around town
>she was fucking mad as hell
>she lost a family member to drunk driving
>didn't talk to me for a week
>apologized for my reckless behavior
>back to normal
>day before thanksgiving
>she's getting weird with me
>ask what's wrong
>suddenly, she explodes with how she hasn't been happy in a long time, that being single or taken she still feels empty, and how she feels like shit because I'm trying so hard for her and she feels nothing
>tell her it's okay I'll always be here blah blah
>from this point on she's more honest about her fake feelings
>admitted that sex has been hurting her
>starts showing more depressive symptoms
>sex slows down to a stop
>she gets anxiety around me now
>won't even let me touch her at this point
>ask her what she wants
>she doesn't know anymore
>suggest that we end it
>she has a panic attack and a seizure from the mere suggestion(she has panic disorder)
>we take another break
>we're not going to talk until next monday
>thinking this whole time that I've been the perfect boyfriend for her
>realizing now that being with me has been an emotional roller coaster for her
>now wondering if she wants to say with me for me, or so she won't be alone
These late night feels are killing me. I haven't spoken to her in 36 hours and it's driving me nuts. Idk if I'm being abused or not, but this sure as hell feels better than my first long term relationship

I figure most people don't want to read an oldfag's life story.
So I'll keep it brief and just say
>A woman I love strings me along
>I love her so much even though she is toxic
>She only likes me because I give her positive attention
>She will never love me the way I love her
>She knows how I feel, and I know she doesn't want to commit to me
>I'm hurting myself knowing this
>I'm trying to move on, but women aren't peaking my interest
>Women who fall for me aren't a challenge
>My obsession over her is unhealthy
>I'm convinced I will not meet a woman who will challenge me, who is attractive, and who is mysterious like her.

I dunno why I bothered writing this, but I guess I felt like sharing.

Skype: PrizePirate

>>23007558
>Haven't left house more than 6 times past 3 years, burden on family
>No job experience
>Graduated with bachelor's before all that, but it is useless (both because area and field)
>Crappy town with nothing to do and no where to go
>Don't drive
>Not really attractive
>One friend kind of, only talk to them online.
>No girls
>Lots of entry-level interests, but bad at everything on a pro level

Yep, just waiting for the balding to kick in at this point.

I tell myself I'm not lonely. I list off reasons in my head why being single is a good thing. I look at the relationships my friends are in and feel a truly great sense of a relief that I don't share the same responsibilities. And for the most part, I will get along just fine this way.

But every now and then, I'll have a very real, very cruel dream. Maybe I'm laying on the couch with a girl with her head on my chest. Maybe I'm just holding an intimate private conversation away from the crowd. Maybe it's just a kiss on the forehead. Whatever the dream, it is usually enough to knock me down low for a few months.

I start wanting to die. Listening to sad music. Looking at old crushes. Beating myself up over old chances at relationships. All while struggling dearly to remember the dream, and the way it felt. To keep the feelings captured and alive, despite them eating me from the inside out.

That brief few seconds of dreaming, of being close to someone, not feeling alone in the world, and genuinely caring more about them than about myself... Well, to be honest, even if its just a fleeting figment of my imagination, they are some of the happiest moments of my life.

>>23015239
Jesus dude, I'm in the same spot, I could mistake this as my post

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>>23013777
>There will be others.

Gets harder to believe every day. I'm in my 30's, half crippled, have the nerdiest hobbies you can imagine, and shave my head

>start hanging out again with girl I had a brief relationship with
>thought I could be friends
>still have feelings
>think she keeps dropping hints
>for example
>take the last bus home together
>my stop is much earlier than hers
>have been sitting largely in silence
>once we're coming up on my stop she starts talking
>oh anon, it's so far to my stop
>I wish I could just go to bed right now
>play it cool
>wonder if I should just go for it next time I see her
Help, I'm losing sleep over this shit

>>23015215
>>23015220

You can`t fix what`s broken inside someone`s head. No matter how hard you try, how much you change yourself, it won`t work , and you`ll be left bruised eventually. All you can do is to set a stable environment for your gf to fix herself, I repeat: herself. But you have to be aware that it will come at your expense and probably still will leave you alone and bruised.

You`re supposed to be her bf, not her shrink.

I wish someone told me that 12 years ago
Fuck, actually someone said so
but I did not listen.

>>23014110
Well. Your ex is an ex. Move on and stop being a beta about it.

>>23007558
ex is with her ex who ignored her for 4 months and somehow thinks he's better than me, who literally jumped through hoops and made the sky shit rainbows but wasn't good enough for her.

also found out she had been anonymously messaging me updates on her life, that she was cheating on me, moved on and was happy, and told me to kill myself multiple times.

I'm fucking sad.
I just want to feel like I'm valuable to someone.

my kik is hkfboy
my skype is desudesulol.

sorry for all the sad life shit.

I keep thinking about suicide more and more frequently when i'm drunk.

>>23014051
Rhodes/Greece

As lovely as this place is, it's boring as shit.

Everyone I know who I talk to online just abruptly leaves.

Even my damn english teacher from 10th grade emailed me asking how I was doing, and to this day has not responded to my response.

Fuck my life.

>>23016605
cukd so hard

>>23016642

to be honest, I don't even care. maybe if you hit me with that like a week ago I'd be broken up, but i'm tired of dealing with someone who's emotionally abusive.

yeah i'm sad, the stupid cunt was my whole world and i'd have done anything for her, but one can only take so much gaslighting, lies, abuse and manipulation.

i'm definitely more angry than sad these days, but that's cool with me, it's the right emotion.

>>23016652
dude she sounds like a bitch. i hate hearing stuff like this, (despite the asshole comment)

unfortunately theres no real advice other than move on, forget about her and the whole shitty scenario.

>>23016665

it's been 4 months and for the first time i feel ready to. thanks, anon, really.

she's also stalking my tumblr now which is fucking hilarious.

>>23016677
ive been through bad break ups before, it happens, the more time that passes the easier it is. just block her or whatever you have to do to get rid of her.

>>23016640

For last 20 years I have been observing my closest family die one by one.

The places I spent the best times of my childhood are no longer my home and they become more and more unfamiliar.

Sometimes I go to google maps, point to my late grandparents` address, switch to street view and "drive" around the neighbourood I used to run around for almost 4 decades
Eventually I "drive by" my grandparents` home
>the image is still from time when at least one of them was still alive
>see familiar curtains in windows
>see familiar plants and trinkets on windowsills
>cry.

I'm depressed because I'm horribly in debt because I gave my mum money to help with the care of my two autistic brothers and she fucked off to Turkey. Abandonment and I'm always worried I won't make rent.

>>23017121

Fuck.Nothing hurts more than stabbing in the back frrom the closest family.
My sympathies anon.

>>23017161
Thank you. Like all things I'm sure it will pass. I just want rid of the debt.

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The holidays can suck it. Odds are I'm going to end up going to a park on xmas. And having steak and shake once again. I don't want to see my family. I live alone she moved out a month ago. I'm not afraid of death I haven't been since I was ready to die last month. I wish I would have jumped sometimes. Just to make it there but the message stopped me. I can call people but they don't understand.

Sometimes I wish someone would try to rob me at my job so they can be like I'll shoot you and I wouldn't be afraid of death I would welcome it.

As for my family they all support me but haven't seen me in a year and it's Sorta scary I'm honestly afraid of them and what they think.

I don't sleep at night and I normally wake up at least twice. Ffs I'm just rambling now and the only thing that helps me sleep is a panda she got me last year. Pic related.

If I end up in the er this weekend I won't be surprised shit even now I'm ready to ball my eyes out.


Kik: elmotehazn

The monotony of my life is... overwhelming.

Since the biggest event this year, time flew by. The only thing that I can remember is the time I had a major depressive episode, where I slept to pass the time.

My fears of being bipolar are all but confirmed.

Some days, I just want to drink or smoke until everything feels good again, but I can't because it's impossible for me to live on my own unless I lived in a shitty car, so I have to be mindful of my mom's wishes. We both need each other because I'm so sheltered and she's so depressed.

Even so, I feel like doing just that. There's literally nobody for me here except for my family, who I'm sure is tired of me being a failure. I feel more comfortable fucking around with my 4chan mates than I do at work. Maybe eventually I'll pack my shit up and go.

But fuck me, I just want something to dull the sharpness of reality, and video games sure aren't working as well as they used to.

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In the beginning of this month, the one relationship I thought I had turned out to be deceitful and ruined me throughout.

This person moved in with me come beginning of July and I had literally everything set up for them upon arrival, including a new apartment, paid expenses, and even their application. In 20/20 hindsight, I might've been more desperate than I realized because they lied to me before and I felt like I could accept their apology... Three times.

In the first two months of our living together, I was so happy to see them and live with them that it blinded me by how they actually were. They didn't have a job for that period and I asked them time and time again to get one, to the point where I had to drag them to Mickey D's. But rather they weren't paying attention to me by playing nonstop TF2 and texting/Skyping with their friends. Drove me up the wall.

I had lost my job around the start of October and hoped they would help me out as an emotional support, but they hadn't. Just TF2... It got to the point where we would fight constantly. Sex was slowing to a halt and I can't take that.

Come to beginning of this month and they wanted to go back to their mother's basement as a "break," leaving me with the bill of rent three days before it was due. I lost the apartment and the deposit. My father offered me to come back but I was extremely stubborn about that.

A week ago I learned that the person I loved told me that they never had a spark for me and only lived with me because I deserve to be happy. They had someone else they wanted to be with but told them that they needed time to be with themself. They then finally said that we should just remain friends and broke it off with me.

To sum it up, I was lied to, cheated on, had my heart broken, wasted my life for them, unemployed, alone (everyone is gone this Christmas), and used. Used. I hate having my kindness abused and used.

Thank you.

Kik - alfy_attack

Pic is us. I'm on the left.

>>23015698
bumping in hope of advice

>>23015698
I've been in this situation bro and trust me I know it sucks but you gotta run and never look back. It's gonna hurt a lot in the short term but it will be better for you both in the long run

My grandpa that I was pretty close to passed away and my mom and sister aren't handling it very well and I'm worried about them. Close friend committed suicide not 3 days later. An ex-gf that I really don't want anything to do with is stuck in an abusive relationship now and keeps coming to me about it and I really don't know what to do because I still care about her well-being. To top it all off my dad relapsed on heroin even though when he got clean he was told by a doctor if he ever started shooting again there it will probably be the end of his life. It's been a fucking rough month. Trying to keep my head up though.
Kick ReaganCoxKCHC hit me up if you got some shit you wanna talk about. I've seen some shit and dealt with depression my entire life so I might be able to help

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I went on my first date ever not too long ago. It hasn't been for any lack of trying that it's taken so long to happen, and it's probably only because we met on the internet that it even got there.

Then I went on my second, and then for no reason I can pick up on she's stopped responding to me entirely.

Life is clearly trying to get me as close to no longer being a KV as possible so that I can start to genuinely hope, so that it hurts the most when snapping it all away. At this point I'm literally incapable of comprehending the idea that somebody could want me - if I even dream that a girl so much as touches my shoulder to get my attention, my mind immediately realizes it's not real and wakes me up. I don't hate myself at all; it's just, I can only touch a hot burner so many times without expecting the same result.

There's so much more to life than this but I can't stop it from completely dominating my thoughts. I'm usually very productive, but my work performance is slipping and I haven't been able to concentrate on anything but idly browsing the internet recently. I don't even know where to go anymore; school, work, local areas, internet, wherever, there just doesn't seem to be one girl on the planet who is willing to give me a chance.

If you're unconfident like me, stay away from nightclubs.

They are not fun.

It's Christmas and Christmas is shit and makes me angsty and depressed and I like this girl which is a big deal because I never ever like anyone but I actually like this girl but all I do is get paranoid that she might be dating someone else and it makes me feel sad and apparently I really like run-on sentences too.

I have been single for two years now that I have split with my ex due to discovering multiple ongoing affairs. That relationship just completely destroyed all of my self confidence. It left me so unstable to the point where I almost killed myself and ended up having to drop out of university to seek counseling. It's been two years, I've gotten my life financially back together, but I now just have no encounters with women outside of work. I don't even know how to approach them to try and build rapport. I don't know what to do now honestly.

>>23019790
I feel you. I just want to go to bed, never wake up.

I just hate the holidays and feel like I've never made a lasting impression anyone.

skype is rebreaded add me and we can talk or whatever.

>>23019848
It will get better for us. One day.

>tfw home alone for christmas like usual, family always goes on vacation
>normally have a sub to XIV with a bunch of friends to ignore that fact
>sub runs out this time on xmas day, no cc to renew right away
>all 2 of my irl friends will be busy with actual family
might just kill myself desu senpai

>>23014111
Thank you. I needed that.
I hope things work out for you as well and you lead a happy healthy life. Take care of yourself.

So, hi, my name is Ricardo, im from Costa Rica, btw sorry for my bad english(still learning) today is my 27 birthday and im alone, im a fat and short guy so is really dificult for me to be popular and all my family had left so im all by myself today because i had to stay because i have to work on my thesis for my degree.
I have been working in this for so long that i have no social life or friends anymore, i just stay in my home working or studying and im feeling traped.
Also im starting to feel like i cant date girls, because im to shy and always get anxious when im arround them so i haven't had a date sins 2008 neiter have any girl friend.
I just want to talk to somebody or maybe spend my birthday kik: Don_Dinamita

>>23020109
Are you a qt grill? I will pay for you if you are.

I keep meeting guys I think are really cool and just as I start to allow myself to imagine a future with them I find out something about them that destroys all hopes and dreams

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>>23021091
Substitute guys with girls and you have me, save for the most recent one where it was totally my fault. Shit sucks. Sorry about that. What happened with your most recent guy?

I spent half my savings/a fuck ton of money on a non refundable ticket to see my best friend/sort of romantic interest halfway across the world but they've been really abusive lately and today was really the final straw for me. I don't know what to do and I can't stop crying please help

>>23021365
Go on holiday?
Fuck that bitch

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>>23021365
Have you tried calling the airline and seeing if they'll allow the money to be used as a credit for future flights? Sometimes if you call before the flight happens, they'll let you do that.

Regarding the relationship itself, it's probably better that you found this out before getting on that plane. There's never a good time for losing a friend or lover, but there are always worse times for one. I don't really know you, so I can't pretend I have any answers for you. I just hope you'll keep an open mind in looking for the next step in your life. The day before you met this person, you never knew they were about to enter your life. Who knows what tomorrow will bring? Just keep strong until that tomorrow comes.

Pic unrelated.

>>23021393
I wish I could but I can't afford that

>>23021406
The flight is on Tuesday though I don't know if they can do something so soon. But I'll try I guess. I just can't believe this is happening, should I really 100% not go?

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>>23021461
I really couldn't tell you what the airline is capable of, but the sooner you call, the more likely you are to get some sort of resolution. They're in the business of retaining customers, so they'll likely attempt to accommodate you in some way.

As far as the relationship goes, that's for you to decide. Personally, I'd need a very good reason to go if I was in your position. You seemed plenty upset writing that post, and the fact that you flagged abuse of all things makes me VERY hesitant to consider it.

Pic maybe related?

Critser93

I wont talk bout my shit much but i will be happy to listen to you guys vent ill try my best to help

>>23019573
I don't think I will do that.

>>23022576
wrong thread bucko

>>23021054
i am in-game ;)

Gf of 2 years cheated on me a few days ago. Now spending the holidays alone and iwanttodie

Skype: wind.bear

I found out earlier today by accident that my father is gay and I don't know how to deal with it. I'm not 100% sure yet, even though what happened earlier was pretty traumatising. I could get definite proof but I'm scared of what I'll find. Has anybody else had similar experiences?

If all of this had happened to someone else I would be laughing my ass out but it's happening to me and I dont know what to do, holy shit.

Kik: to.kick.a.skunk
please respond

>>23023272
TOPKEK
gib maor details
hahahahahaahahahahaahahahahhaha

I don't have any family left to celebrate with. I haven't for a long time now actually.
My mom passed away from lung cancer when I was 18. A year later my I found my dad's corpse after he had a heart attack. My birthday is wedged between those two events and they all happened in the "holiday season". My sister essentially gave all our extended family the middle finger and fled to Japan. She just recently moved to Thailand. We try and stay in touch, but we were never that close to begin with.
I'm 26 now and just bought my own house. Been living with friends and friend's families after I lost the house I inherited from my parents. This time of year really does a number on me. I have probably only slept for around 4 hours every night this week. I wake up from the most vivid and horrible dreams and I just want to die sometimes. It doesn't help that every week something seems to go wrong at my house and I just feel so overwhelmed all the time. All I want is the comfort that comes with having someone behind you if everything goes to hell. All I want is someone to look to for guidance when I don't know what to do. But I have been alone for more than half a decade and I know that's never going to change. They aren't coming back.
Being an orphan during the holidays is no good.

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>>23023337
Don't laugh, man. Feels bad. While looking for a picture to test our printer he accidentally showed me drag queen and tranny porn folder

He awkwardly tried to pass it as funny pictures he had saved but they weren't funny at all, anon. They weren't fucking funny.

I'm working 12 hour shifts everyday, I'm lonely and I want to die. I'm just so fucking tired.

>>23023930
No friends at work?

>>23023939

Just some people I chit chat with, can't seem to fit in with people at work.

>>23023956
How come?

>>23023963

I'm avoidant as fuck and our interests are hugely different. I'm a quiet weeb while all they talk are sports and sex. It mostly stems from me, I gotta be more social and stuff.

life just keeps getting worse every year.
no one to spend christmas with, just after spending my 21st completely alone. moms my only family member and shes working and i have no friends and even if i did theyd have their own families to be with.
at least i have my dog, but hes getting really old and will be dead soon.
i have no food in the fridge but cant really eat anyway because i just got my wisdom teeth out. aside from that my upper lip has been going numb probably from malnutrition because of college
just going to sit around watching end of evangelion and try not to get too suicidal.
my life is a fucking joke joke.

>>23024116
>joke joke
I'M a fucking joke

>>23007558
Never actually has a real connection with someone.
You know you sometimes see people they laugh and do stuff and they're like...synchronized? They know how the other feels, how to cheer them up, how to make them happy, you know you can see that they're connected.
I've never had that.
I've never had someone that I just "click" with.


>Anyway, MERRY CHRISTMAS YOU FUCKING UNLOVED FAGGOTS!

I'm just lonely. None of my friends ever wanna hang out, and nobody online ever wants to talk or play video games with me.

>>23024116
>>23024133
I'd play some vidyas with you guys...If I could.
>>23023272
Hahahahaahahahahahahahahahahhaha

>>23024208
why cant you

>>23024245
I'm too poor to afford any online games, at the minute.

>>23007558
I've been alone for a few years.
I was never out going but I wouldn't call myself an introvert maybe a little social anxiety here and there.
met a girl 3 years ago I really thought we were gonna work but fuck me man that shit always falls apart.
girl goes off to college about a year later and ends up in an abusive relationship.
I can't help her she lives too far away.
I met another girl while I was at my friends wedding and I fell in love with her in minutes.
she has a lot of issues and I just want to help but she constantly pushes me away.
feelin bad... could be worse though

Reading this thread almost makes me feel bad that I get depressed over shit in my life that is nowhere near as bad as yours. But I just can't help myself feeling sad...mainly because most of shitty things in my life are caused by my own fuckups and I feel like I can make it better but I just don't. I keep doing the same mistakes over and over and it just makes me more depressed and self-hating. I know it all sounds vague but I don't really feel comfortable talking about it here....I guess I just wanted to vent a bit. I hope things will get better for you guys...and me.

>>23023386
Hey. Wanna talk?

>>23024293
You got someone to vent too, lad?
It helps if you just rant and talk about it so you could put it into perspective and understand it more, it's not a competition to see who has it worse we've all got burdens to bare.

>>23024133
I'll play vidya with you if you're fellow eurotrash

>>23024125
Take your time and get to know someone, then you'll see if you really get along well with each other and can build a connection. Don't just wait for someone you instantly click with.

>>23024322
I tried that, after eight years I thought I had someone. But they ended up leaving me, talking shit about me to other people to gain popularity, and made my friends leave me by spreading lies and shit.

just spending christmas alone with no family or friends. trying to get alcohol poisoning tonight

Christmas always makes me feel like shit I don't know why. Breakup memories are haunting me pretty bad today as well. My skype is meepcoll 24/m for whatever that is worth.

Mostly just lonely. Have been for a long time.
Poor as fuck and can't afford nice things. "Just enough is good enough" but it's hard to reach "just enough" sometimes.

>Never had a gf. Decided to lose virginity on CL and it just kinda sucked. Didn't even come.
>No confidence/very low self-esteem
>Used to have extreme social anxiety. Got over it after a long struggle, but any confidence or love is all faked.
>I'm not worth dating because I'm broke, can't drive, and I'm not attractive or interesting enough to make up for it. Attempts on OKC and shit like that have cemented that suspicion.
>Lucky enough to have a supportive family, but not close to any of them except my father somewhat, who's too far away for us to visit.
>Have a few friends but don't see them much. Don't have the money to go to Smash events and shit like that in the area. I get along with my roommate, but he's got a new girl so naturally I don't bother them. Tried to get along with her but she seems to not like me for some reason.
>Kind of get attention from girls online but they're either too far away or it just doesn't seem to go anywhere.
>Lately I've been getting bad headaches when I masturbate so I can't even do that any more. Spent money I didn't have on a doc to tell me to just hope it goes away in a couple weeks and if not I'll have to find money for some scans and shit.
tl;dr poor, lonely, no self worth. pity party xd

I guess I'll post my Skype here. If you want a normal description of me, you can ctrl+f it in the Skype or /shut/ threads.
pichi.dee

>Dumped my ex a month ago
>I want to tell her merry Christmas
>I can't because she told me to leave her alone and I will look pathetic and clingy as fuck

>>23024313
That's the thing I don't think I have anyone to vent to. I mean I think some people around me would care but I never actually tried. I almost always keep shit to myslef since talking about my problems only reminds me of them and that makes me anxious as fuck. Which itself is kind of a problem I guess...
but short version is
>25, no gf ever, virgin
>struggling to finish college after I already dropped once and got re-accepted
>broke as fuck

I just wanted to say:
Fuck you, Christmas.
Fuck you, winter.

lonely, depressed, 20 yo virgin here
no real friends, no hobbies, no job, social anxious
skype: avimnio

>>23024384
Which part of the world are you?

Alcohol is a hard way to go, not guaranteed

>>23024384
same, but i get incapacitating spins before I get to poisoning level lol

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>tfw lonely because you're 0/10, completely worthless

fuck contact info because no one really wants it

>>23024426
I don't have kik bro but you're more than welcome to snap me if you want to talk.
>ducktouchet69

As for the virgin thing don't worry about it, sex isn't all it's hyped up to be you'll find a nice guy or girl to shag eventually.

>>23024426
A lot of my friends are retaking thier years too, it doesn't mean you're a fuck up or something just means you have to work harder than you did before.

>>23025226
if pic is you the only fucking thing you have to do is loose some weight, then you'll have a chance. you crybaby

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Yes. I will take an open opportunity to bitch. But seriously, please I really need to talk to someone. I'm getting really really bad.

>be born to abused, anti-social parents

>they pull me out of school, move to deep country, and homeschool me.

>as I grow up, they teach me every car that passes our house is trying to kidnap me, and I have an evil aunt that wants to hunt me down and molest me.

>Put me on prozac, effectively making me dependent on it for the rest of my life.

>At fifteen, mom attempts suicide, involves whole family

>Entire family secretly goes off and gets therapy, doesn't tell me for some reason, and I get no therapy.

>At fifteen again, brother gets cancer

>Have blocked out most of my brother having cancer

>Despite the way I was raised, try to go out into the world anyway because I am a naturally social person

>All terrible experiences. It's too late, and I already have no idea how to talk or interact with others at all.

>at 20, decide to take break from life, live year as NEET without job

>Get job this year, decide to try to attack life again, extremely depressed, despite prozac.

>Heavily contemplate suicide. Put loaded gun to head several times.

>Work with several cute girls, they all like me until they realize I'm quiet, then they start to talk shit about me behind my back, and verbally antagonize me.

>Try to strangle myself with a belt. Fail.

>Try to talk more, face my fears, and try to make friends, despite all of this

>Get along with this one girl really well, make a facebook and gather some 'friends' send her a friend request

>rejected same day

I keep asking god, or whatever power there is, if there is one, to just help me. Just help me at all. Please. I want to be happy. I just want to be happy and normal. I just want to be a normal person that went to highschool, and prom, and had friends, and hell, was even bullied. I don't even know if I'm physically attractive or ugly, I've had so little interaction with people. Help me.

>>23025764
Nigga you fine looking. Just don't spill spaghetti out of your pockets when you interact with people and you'll be good.

Gonna be 31 in a few days. I have depression, complex PTSD, and OCD. Been in a depressive slump for weeks, quit my job on Monday in a fit of fuckeverythingitis. Was way too stressful anyway.

Been neglected and heavily abused almost all my life. Was born and raised as a girl but I knew since I was little that I'm a man, only started transitioning this year.

Was married to a horrible man who forced me to have children I never wanted. I love them and miss them sometimes but I am not a parent type. Ex husband totally cut me off from them, I'm still waiting for the papers to come announcing that his wife is adopting them. I just want to move on.

I want weed so bad but I'm broke, I'm almost totally numb at this point and I can only feel human when I'm high. I've been nothing but a thing for people to use and then ditch, mostly a sex toy.

So I'm sitting here, in gross clothes and sheets because I have no way to wash them, no family or friends for the holidays. I've met a dude who's really sweet and knows I'm trans, dunno how that's going to go.

I'm trying to hang in there so I can get my CDL/A and drive trucks next year. I'm just exhausted to my soul of having to fight for even the smallest things. So, so tired.

No one has ever truly been there for me. I was always treated like a burden, I don't mean to be, I'm just. . . so. . . fucking. . . tired.

I need weed and snuggles.

I'll bite, and depending on what happens, might post my kik later.

>24, dated a girl for years before she left.

>decently attractive, but antisocial

>no plans to change this

>enjoy living social life on internet

>only have a few close friends on net

>mfw no grill

I've dated a few girls and slept with a couple, but all for literally nothing, all I want is a female companion who enjoys the same things I do (mostly playing MMO games) and would hang out with me day to day. Preferably someone clingy, and halfway attractive. I have a job even, and it may be a minimum wage job, but I'm good enough at managing that I'm up nearly 2000$ and have taxes coming around.

Sometimes I tell myself that I don't want this, and convince myself that I'm better off alone due to, if this someone leaves, they're just as good as the others, as everything will have been meaningless.

>>23025764
Hey dude. <3 you look good! Please dont kill yourself. You can do this. You've seriously got some balls for going out there and trying to talk to people. I dont know how to say this to make you believe it but I know you can do this. Maybe its the fact that I know you want to cause you've expressed that. Im sorry your childhood was so shitty. Its an awful thing to live through, really it is. But you can do it you can do it you can do it. Keep trying, you'll get the hang of it. Also, girls love quiet types. I dont know what youre worries about. Also we don't nor.ally talk about guys behind their back so the one youre referring to just sounds like a cunt. Hang in there buddy <3 also nice arms, I'm 'mirin

>>23023930
Why are you working so much?? Dont do that if you dont have to. It'll be ok dude, keep at it, dont lose hope and don't let others push you around.

>>23024296
I'm many hours late to respond but I'm always happy to talk with someone.
My kik is OfTheCrash if you want to message me there sometime.

>>23025764

You're one person who I think therapy would definitely help, given your background. I think you need help coping with your shitty childhood, but more than that they can teach you social clues and stuff you might have not picked up.

I posted in the brutal rate thread hoping to get knocked down a few pegs.

It'd be nice to know it's not just my personality that sucks.

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>>23007793
You don't want a /soc/ girl. They're all very beautiful and have vaginas but they're camwhores and/or irl whores and even of they aren't they have problems beyond your mental and emotional fortitude.

Despite me saying this I'll probably disobey my own advice and continue to worship them for attention like >>23007622


Fuck, I am so lonely.

18/f
Hi...I'm sad because one of my best friends died this week

i stopped talking to girl
i miss girl

>>23025764
Similar situation, except minus the prozac and I was actually allowed into highschool.

Unfortunately, by then I had already become a stunted little fucker who drove everyone away.

Multiple girls were interested because I was cute back then, but my looks are gone now and I remain a kissless, handholdless virgin.

Had I been born in another place or time, I might've been someone great, but I'm too dead inside to carry on anymore.

Time and again I snatch defeat from the jaws of victory.

I don't even care about being happy, I just wish to be someone worth being.

Would offer to chat, but have neither kik nor skype.

Best of luck to you.

>>23025579
sorry for being a crybaby. i know saying this makes it worse but it sucks knowing i will be alone forever no matter what i do. if all i had to do is lose weight then i'd do it, except that it would make my facial asymmetry more obvious. so i'm just stuck being nearly 0/10 no matter what

>>23027290
You don't know that.
Sorry I don't have more

I'm in excurating pain and can't sleep

>>23026824
If anyone else is grieving I'd like to be friends...I miss him so much

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today i played animal crossing after 4 months to feel better.
none of my villagers left me.
they all welcomed me back with a smile.
nobody else does.
but still.
it felt good.

Jammie.dodgington
Group pleases

skype: martin33667

skype kasperskiye
or snapchat brtckzr

im really lonely and depressed but i can chat about absolutely anything. just want someone nice and kind

>>23027468

That's life though, meetings and departures.

Holding onto the few happy moments you have with a person is purely self-destructive. If you drift apart from someone then try to force it or taking it as a cue to not make connections with people you deny what made being around that person in the first place.

I hate to be so courage wolf about this, but you can't let the non-permanence of people deter and discourage you. That's people, if they were permanent we'd all be a bacteria colony on the side of a dock and we would have art, music and space rockets.

Wow, I'm posting in this thread--hit a new low, might as well embrace it with green text
> be 26, male, brown and nerdy.
> be virgin, never have a functioning and happy relationship.
> be accustomed to rejection
> have hope for the future because you aren't a fedora, incel, loveshy or a faggot.
> be unable to get a woman to go on a date with you despite the fact that they talk to you willingly and with interest.
> want only to have a simple , slow, easy relationship that isn't deep or long term.


What now?

Graduated HS this year and realizing how much I took my time there for granted. I was surrounded by potential friends and girlfriends constantly. Now I work with the same 4 people part time and only see my family on my time off.

I've never really had a social life. The closest thing to it was when I had a gf and she would occasionally tell me to invite people out. So, obviously, I'm not unlikeable enough for people to refuse to spend time with me, but why am I never asked to hang out? Is it some sort of unwritten rule that the person who isn't part of a group needs to make an appeal to them if he wants to be friends? Opportunities to meet people are much scarcer in the adult world, so I only see things getting worse unless I go to college soon.

I haven't been "out" in at least 4 years, and I'm fucking sick of this. All I want someone to say is "Hey, anon. We're doing X this weekend. Want to come with?" but it never happens. I'm a bit of an oddball and had nothing in common with most of the people I associated with in HS, so maybe that's why? It's difficult to find people like myself and I don't want to pretend to like shit I don't just to fit in.

>>23028623
How do you ask a girl out? Do you express how you feel about her?

Aight
>academic failure
>about to be kicked out of major
>which is music fucking history i can't even do the thing I love right
>owe school thousands of dollars due to failure have no money, have no job to have more time to study
>have sleep apnea havent slept well ever, machine does nothing
>Christmas alone, snapchats of people being happy makes me sadder then anything
At least my band doesn't suck
KiK me we'll get bummed out together
Kik: thelowestselfesteem

>>23028690
Usually I spend a couple of weeks getting to know her, complimenting her where possible, being supportive without being nosy or presumptive. I try to talk about things she is interested in. If after about a month there is significantly more than just neutral/benevolent tolerance, I ask her to have coffee to get to know her better.

>>23028731
You need to be flirty. Tell her you really like her before asking her out.

Hi guys, I don't usually post in threads like this but I think I qualify for being lonely/depressed.
I'm not gonna bore you with a boring story, we're all here for one reason or another but basically lonely, it's the key thing here, I can't attract people sexually and am a virgin male and never had a gf.

>>23028742
Been trying, I'm just afraid seeming creepy.
I had tried to flirt with a woman who seemed very interested, only for her to tell me that I was making her uncomfortable because we weren't going to happen.

>>23028757
You must be me.
A lot of people in this thread are me.

>>23028761
Are you a failure in life too?
I have no ambitions or motivation to pursue a career or wealth.
I can't even make up for all my bad points with money.

>>23028759
Flirt with more girls. Sounds like she just wasn't interested. Don't be overtly sexual when you flirt, either; be suggestive.

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Eh
Fuck it
>I enjoy "depression"
>deconstructively nihilistic
>psychological/ontological/(meta)physicalist constructs/illusions are mere simulacrum that are beyond true/false so who gives a shit
>I have a nihilistic paralysis called "cosmopsis"—an inability to choose a course of action from all possibilities
>I'm in debt from college
>on probation (so no weed for me, my only relief)
>just got a shitty job after searching for 8 months (even though I despise capital and capitalism)
>misanthropic
>have to deal with people (fuck)
>stuck at my mom's house (fuck i hate her so fucking much its disgusting) till my either my savings regenerate or I'm kicked out and made homeless but whatever
>blah blah blah other shit no one gives a fuck about
>everybodywalkthedinosaur.jpg

>>23028768
Been trying, but I'm like a tortoise, I like to take my time and get to know someone. This slows my ability to flirt.
I just wish I could get a woman to understand where I am coming from.
As much as I am looking for a fairly casual relationship, I would be happier with a more stable and deeper commitment.

>>23026176

I live in 3rd world bruh, we don't have autism bux or free money here. You starve if you don't work.

>>23028767
I'm just a lump of wasted potential atm. I guess I'm slowly getting my life together but I don't have much ambition or motivation for much of anything. Right now all I want is to lose my virginity and find a qt girl with glasses who will love me but given my lack of drive, looks, esteem, and social anxiety, I'm beginning accept I may be alone for a much longer time. And when I think of that I feel even lonelier.

I miss having someone to spoil and dote on for the holidays. My house and bed seem so empty. 26/m, perpetually lonely. Kik is the.vagabond.king

I'm lonely, mostly because I know I'm going to die soon. We all know we're going to die so I'm not alone in that at least, but I just developed cancer and have no way to fight it with a low paying job at 25 years old.

So I've kind of accepted my fate. I'm living on, spending the last of my days doing what I can to leave this place in better shape than when I came in.

I've opted to stay away from relationships. I know I'm dying and it's not right for me to put myself on the market when I know I'll just end up breaking someone's heart. At times it hurts to see the beauty in people and knowing I couldn't live a long happy life alongside them. But I can live a short happy life.

But right now its a snowy christmas, and im in my lonely room under the blankets watching anime with cookies and milk. I wish I had someone close to share my oreos with.

>>23028979

Obamacare?

>>23028979
Can we skype?

>>23010967

Same age and in same state as me. except different occupation

have a man hug

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>23/M/UK
>Sexual Orientation
Bicurious
>Relationship Status
Single
>Text / Mic / Cam
Yes/Rather/Certainly
>Favorite Music
Beatles, Can, Animal Collective, Incredible String Band, Pinder Family, John Fahey, Bluegrass. I love music.
>Favorite Movies
Not into many
>Favorite TV Shows
Same
>Favorite Books
Walden, music theory/songwriting books
>Favorite Vidya
Alex Kidd, old stuff, Gunstsr Heroes! Jet Set Radio!
>Interests
Psychonautery (even a word) wordplay, poetry, playing instruments
>What boards do you use?
/x/ /soc/
>Are you interested in Skype groups?
Sure, yes.
>Are you a NEET?
Yes.
>What languages do you speak?
English.
>What are you NOT looking for?
Angries, nasties, blue meanies
>What are you looking for?
Chillies, nicies, hearts club bands
>Pic
Profile pic.
>Contact info
Jammie.dodgington

>>23029015
yea can I add you though?

>>23029101
Jammie.dodgington x

>>23029101

Very serious question, have you checked healthcare.gov to see if you can get a plan? I realize it's a wrenching experience, but have you exhausted all avenues?

I'm doing better. Writing down goals and achieving them. In the last two months I've quit smoking and started cooking for myself and eating healthy. Bought a blender for myself for Christmas and will be making some delicious kale smoothies every morning (ok they aren't exactly delicious but not as bad as it looks). My acne is a lot better now which is boosting my confidence a lot. My goal for the new year is to start working out regularly. I'm in decent shape due to a relatively physically demanding job, (loading trailers in a furniture warehouse) but I need to pack on some muscle onto parts of my body that don't get used much. My arms / back / legs are good but my chest looks like a skeleton.
I'm still lonely as fuck but I'm trying to channel that emotion into something productive, even if its just cleaning my apt or doing some research on nutrition or whatever.

Also I stopped fapping about 10 days ago though I cheated once about half way through. Its rough, I need that fucking dopamine kick or whatever. Everytime I get the urge to fap I have to replace it with something or else I just get extremely restless and start pacing the apartment. The only options are smoking and eating. Fortunately the local corner store sells individual smokes so I go buy those, usually 2-3 a day since I've stopped fapping. Better than buying a pack I guess. Also better than fapping 3-5 times a day.

/end rant.

Happy Christmas everyone, we'll all make it.
Well maybe not everyone, but I will.

Yep. Horrible Christmas. It seems I give to everyone and am there for them to support them emotionally yet none of them give that back to me which is fine, it's not that I feel owed anything it's that I suffer just as much and need friends too. I wish people didn't take advantage of me trusting them and being kind...I don't want to stop being nice and start being weary of everyone but it seems that if I continue being so dumb and gullible the world will eat me alive. Drowning in my pity pool.

kik-bootyturd

>>23007558
I'm generally alone most of my time, but I really like it except for wanting moments of intimacy with somebody. Other than that things are tentatively well. I got a good new job, but there is a chance that after training I may not do well enough to keep it and I had to get a new car so that's good because it's about a decade younger than the one I had. The down side is higher payments. If I'm still on track this time next year I'll feel pretty good. It's just gonna push back my plan to finally move out of my house.

>>23013419
That shit is rough man

>>23029479
this is me :(

I broke up with my girlfriend a few months ago because of distance problems. I thought I was fine with it, but we started talking again and I realized I'm still in love with her. The worst part is that I'm realizing how awful I was to her, and she's so happy now and there's no way I can ever get her back. I'm happy for her but I feel so lonely all the time now.

2015 was pretty shit

Graduated in 2014 as a games programmer, no luck getting a job for half a year, not one successful application where I even got an interview, all my friends got jobs pretty quick, we all had the same sort of CVs (with me having 6 years of job experience on mine, while they had never worked a day in their life, gg).

Ended up looking in the general IT industry as I was told by everyone I would get a job extremely easy... what a load of shite. Still not got a job in IT, every interview I get, slaps me with the "you have no experience" dick. It's now the end of 2015 and I've been trying to find normal work, like working in a cinema or in a shop and apparently I'm over qualified and their not interested in someone who will "leave when they get a better offer" as they put it.

It honestly sucks, unemployed for so long and people just think I'm lazy and can't be assed to work since graduating. I feel embarrassed and a failure when I see and speak to friends and family, "oh, how's it going?" "You know... Still looking for a job..." "ah... Okay.."

I hope 2016 is better... Because this year was just a sack of aids.

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I will provide you with friendship and possibly more if you are willing to do me a favor. All you need to do is go on a certain IRC and give me logs. Easy enough, right? You will be rewarded for your help.

Skype: BlueL0tus

Uhm, ok, I'm sad, ugly, and useless, so want to die but can't.

I'm not writing my life story on here but I don't have any friends and it would be nice to have someone to chat with once in a while, any kinda chat, but am awkward ha. Bye.

I broke up with a girl I was with on and off for 5 years. I don't miss her, but I do wish I could somehow replicate what I had with her with someone else.

I'm unsure whether I want to ever have kids and I am totally opposed to marriage. I'm not opposed to the idea of spending my life with another woman, however.

All that was before this week. Where it finally dawned on me that women don't care about who you are as a man. The only thing they care about is what they can get out of you and what you can provide.

I'm struggling coming to terms with the fact I'll never have a healthy romantic relationship with anyone ever again. Doomed to a life of emotionless sex and paper thin friendships.

Reading some of these posts, it's amazing how people have online relationships, never seeing or talking to a person IRL.

I have a good life now compared to my past. Yet I can't get invested in anything anymore. My last partner was killed partially because of my influence. I got him into heroin. Left got clean then he got killed in a heroin deal soon after.
Most of my old friends are dead or in Jail. I got diseases from sharing rigs and was homeless.

I now have a house. I have a good job and I'm going back to school for something I want. But I still feel wrecked inside. I get feel like my worlds ripping apart for no reason sometimes. I don't want deal with living but dying doesn't seem good either. I wanna go back to shooting dope but I realize I'll just fuck up my life again and my life expectancy is a couple of years with my health.

People care about me and I have a partner now who loves me. But I still find my self unable to care about anything. I can't commit. And when I can't I spiral into isolation and depression for a couple weeks. Shit doesn't stop. It's constant. I don't know what to do. I don't know why life is like this. But I've been thinking of buying dope for the first time in 4 years and oding as its the only pleasurable way I could go.

My life is not good nor bad, I just dont really know what to do now, I have a job at NIKE, wich is good, but don't have a girlfriend, already have a car, still live with my mom 'just to make it less expensive for both of us'. I don't know how to spend money, because I barely have time to play videogames, I'm planning to do a trip to Germany (I'm Belgian btw)

I just dont know what to do, I do have friends and stuff, but thats only when there is a party. I barely talk to anyone if i'm at home or not at work

I'm 19, from Belgium and just search for a person to talk to, no sexual shit

Hit me up on KIK:
blakky578 (blakky was the name of my previous dog, dk why I used it as KIK username tho)

My profile picture says '1600+ Belgian beers'

I'm at home while there's a Christmas party here. I joined but I'm sick and now that it's getting later in the night I just want to be alone and relax. I would lIke to chat with a girl but a bro is fine too.I'm not gay though so don't bother with that crap.
23/m
snapchat: jrhrzo

Recently lost my best friend and my only emotional support over a shitty fight while I had a fever and wasn't thinking straight.

There was a lot of pent up anger over how he treated me but and I usually faked how I felt so he would still be my friend it was a bit pitiful but I miss him so much and hope he won't hate me forever. I don't think he will forgive me though.

/miserable/

>>23028757
I was a virgin up until 2 years ago (Lost at 18) I've always felt kind of like shit but once I lost my virginity I realized sex wasn't the thing that was making me sad and basically from there I've spiraled down worse.

>>23032074
At least you actually lost your virginity. The girl I almost fucked was literally unzipping me ready to go and then she was like btw I have a boyfriend so she fucked off without even doing anything about my extreme blue balls.

>>23007558
Skype: parallelogon
Girlfriend broke up with me yesterday. Saying she is choosing to focus on her kid instead of dating me, which I never made any indication that she had to choose between us. I had always made an effort to keep her kid first and foremost in her life. So now I'm sad and drinking by myself. If you wanna listen to a goofy drunk, send me a call or message.

44 years old.

On /soc/.

'Nuff said.

>>23015167
Lmao cry more.

If you're sad or depressed my honest advice is this; stop visiting 4chan but especially stop visiting /soc/.

It is a hive of vapidity and superficiality.

Skype: sudoku.commiter
I love listening to people's problems, no matter how annoying you are I love annoying.

in an abusive relationship i cant get out of
2015 has been an extraordinarily shitty year

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the last 8 years of my life have either been spent infront of a computer screen or daydreaming. I went from 16 to 24 in the blink of an eye. Were did all my time go? I ask myself this all the time. With no true friends and life events to talk of, i feel hollow and full of painfull remorse.

I just feel fucking stuck. I have shit I want to do, but lacking all motivation. Only my closest friends believe in me and sometimes I wonder if that's feigned, like my own. My job is terrible but everyone tells me how easy and great it is, while I've seriously thought about hanging myself in the bathroom there. That's how much I hate it. Meanwhile I'm stuck in my parents house still, and being condescended to about that because my brother moved out when he was 3 years younger, or at least that's how it feels. Shit isn't really that rough though, I just feel stuck in the fucking mud. Spinning tires. Every day. And every time I complain about this stuff, suddenly everyone knows exactly what I need, as if I ever fucking asked. "And here's why you're wrong." And the thing that does it the most for me is in the form of a question, if anyone can relate : Does anyone else get tired of having to justify every goddamn thing you do, like I'm a fucking retard and this person is checking in to make sure I've thought out what I'm saying?

I'm completely alone. I have no friends. I'd do anything for a girlfriend or boyfriend. But I have no connections to fix it.

I work a dead end job and I'm ugly, all I want is someone to love me and I don't know how to get this to happen.

>>23034602
I'd be your friend, anon.

>>23034614
You don't want to be my friend.

>>23034626
Why shouldn't I?

>>23034630
I'm a bad person. No one sticks around.

>>23034638
I would.

>>23034643
I don't know how I would contact you.

>>23015167
>trying to get attention
>on /soc/
Shocker.
I've been on this board 2 minutes and I've probably already read the most retarded shit that could be posted here. The guy is going through a rough patch and is venting, what are you here for?

>>23034650
Do you have Skype?

>>23034657
I think I do but I can't remember the password.

>>23034673
Steam maybe? I don't have kik or anything like that because I don't have a Smartphone.

>>23034602
iktf man

I've been wondering lately if spending my entire life alone as an outcast has warped my brain and made me permanently retarded or something.

I was working a dead end job and I quit. Now I have to get a new dead end job but I'm not even confident that I could. I snooped my girlfriends phone and found out she had been cheating on me for a long time so I dumped her. That was an LDR with a girl from r9k. I have no way of meeting new people. I was in school but was academically terminated when I stopped going to class and failed out. Now I'm supposed to appeal to the counselor and tell them how things have changed (and nothing has changed) before I can attend community college again.

I'm basically afraid to leave my house and have bad panic disorder and I'm not getting any treatment for that. I tried to and after a few sessions of therapy going nowhere I stopped and now I have a $300 bill I haven't paid that will probably wreck the decent credit I set up for myself. The bitch about that is that I was too anxious to set up any kind of appointment for treatment so my mom took it all into her hands. Now after that's a failure I guess she gave up. I'm not closer to being able to function normally. You could tell me to just go outside and I could but it would all be blurry and I'd be panting and sweating and I wouldn't be able to think.

Anyway so now I'm NEET for several months and rapidly going through my savings. I don't know what I'm supposed to do with myself.

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>just got out of my first relationship, lasted not even a week, was a great guy but really intense, long story
>my entire family lives with my SUPER strict grandma who has Alzheimers because my mom fucked up by not having a job and relying on my step dad who left her
>step dad left to cheat on another woman, got her pregnant, got cancer and came crawling back, he's better now and making money but not enough for us to leave, he's planning to leave again
>get yelled at every day, called a worthless idiotic little bitch, because that's how my mom deals with her stress
>want to become a psychiatrist or neuropsychologist someday, need perfect grades for both plus extracurriculars, volunteering, letters of recommendation, etc. and that's giving me hella anxiety
>feel pretty insecure sometimes, wonder if I'm ever going to find someone that finds me attractive and wants to treat me right for the rest of my life while also wanting similar things I want (kids and possibly marriage someday)
>no friends, never go out, super lonely
the list goes on, I guess I'm lucky compared to others though

>>23034677
Wanna link an Id or something?
>>23034692
At least you can get a girlfriend... How did you even meet a girl from r9k?

>>23034729
I feel like you should wait until you're legal age to post here to complain about your life. :(

>>23034765
I got into Skype groups and Skype contact threads. She lived 3 hours away and was willing to meet me. Apparently that's too far away. She was in tears saying she loved me when I was breaking up with her, and I just can't understand how she could love me and cheat on me the way she did. She never even stopped lying about it. Now there are the decorated gingerbread cookies she made sitting on my table and I think about how much effort she put into the relationship and how great she was and I feel sad. Then I think about how she told some guy that she was thinking about him and his cock and she would hitch a ride over to his house, and then I feel worse.

>>23034801
I'm 18 m8, need a birth cert?

>>23034813
post it so I can steal your identity

>>23034829
okay sure just give me a sec to get a better camera so you will be able to read everything on it

>>23034729
That's a shitty situation I'm really sorry.
I don't understand what you mean by someone never finding you attractive though, you're obviously not bad looking.

>>23034765
http://steamcommunity.com/profiles/76561198059837988

Just friend me and I'll add you back.

>>23034845
Well I'm pretty shy, I guess I mean attractive overall with my personality included. I think I'm a good 6 on an average day. I warm up to people after I get to know them, but idk if there would be someone out there that would be okay with me being so shy at first.

>>23034450
I have the same problem. all the time I am telling myself that everything will be better in the future. everything I do is for the future yet that future might never come and then I just wasted my whole life. even when I was playing world of warcraft I was getting gear so I can have some fun in the future, yeah how cute bam expansion and all gear I gathered was just useless trash.
>>23034729
you look cute, can't be just me who thinks so. get something that forces you to go out from time to time like dog or some sport. I know it sounds stupid from another asocial person but unless you go out you won't find anyone.

>>23034866
It's not really an issue desu. The kinds of guys you're probably attracted to will do all of the work.

>>23034866
You're definitely at least an 8.
I think a lot guys from this website would prefer you to be shy but IRL I know what you mean.

>>23034866
shyness is not bad trait if you are woman. men are mostly dominant so they prefer shy woman over confident or self conscious one.

I just want someone to love me.

>>23035009
me too

>>23035016
I'll love you.

>>23035009
>>23035016
Im a bad person, are you guys bad people as well?

>>23035029
yes I am a worthless fucking piece of shit
>>23035023
i posted my face itt so you probably will want to take that back, just saying

>>23035048
I don't care what you look like. You wouldn't like me though.

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I'm just so sick of being a permavirgin. I'm only teenage for three more months and really want to lose it before I reach my twenties. My anxiety and height (5' 6.5") is what's prevented my v-card from dropping.

>>23035077
i probably would like you.

>>23035101
I'm not a girl.

>>23035118
well he can't seem to score girls so why not try something new eh?

>>23035128
I don't care about looks or gender I just want someone to love me...

>MFW i have liked girls, but never have been liked back.
Like seriously, no matter how many girls i ask, i always get rejected.
It made me socially akward as i know that no matter what girl i get, i'll just end up getting rejected again :/
Add me on kik: 4chanSOCbuddy
I'll try to help you too.

>>23034870
Yeah mate, I always cringe when other people talk about their life. Good or bad I always think, hey at least you got a story to tell.

>>23035118
oh. well damn, i'm sure you'll be okay though anon. for sure you can do better than me
>>23035128
i wanted to at least try women first

Hate my family. Family hates me. I have feelings for a girl that i can't have do to her having a bf. She wouldn't date anyways do to a std. Depressed for 3 years bc of std. Have no friends. Have nothing going for me. So most like going to off myself soon. So fuck living.

I'm kind of just "there" right now.
No job. No friends really. Just doing nothing.
I hate it.

I've fucking fallen in love with my friends sister. We had a one week fling in 2012, but distance ended it. After 3 years of not talking to her, I see her again, and man... she is just perfect. Sucker for mean, sarcastic, freckly girls I guess. Ships have sailed, and it's a rubbish feeling.

I'm kinda drunk right now, so maybe it's just that. Been reading all your stories, and it's nice to feel lonely together.

>>23035418
sup fellow.
>>23035365
sometimes we cant have what we want.

i spend all of my time playing poker, i don't even spend the money i make. could be worse but i'd like to be happy

potworjan

please I'm really sad
please hmu only if you're nice

>>23035488
kurwa.

>>23035477
Not much. I just don't have any energy to do anything right now.
Really want to move out of my parents house so I have some kind of freedom, but I can't afford it, obviously.

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>>23035477
>sometimes we cant have what we want.
i know

I'm 28 and have been depressed and friendless for most of my life. I'm an idiot and prefer to escape reality instead of dealing with shit, I'm sorta trying to make changes now but I have no confidence in myself. I'm trying to get back into the uni I dropped out of 5 yrs ago, not even sure what to major in. I'm too scared of death to kill myself so I guess I'll at least try to unfuck my life. Also I'm a virgin and never had a meaningful relationship because autism.

>>23036165
Baby steps anon. Make a list and just work at that. One thing at a time.

Living the dream!
Addicted to drugs
Working construction
Girlfriend is probably cheating on me
I think I have syphilis (see above)
None of my friends want to know me because of how much I've invested in this girl over the past 5 years. I want to leave her but I'm scared to do so for many reasons (financially and emotionally)

BUT

I finally made the appointment to start going to therapy so I can talk my head off about how shitty my life has been, working 19 years into this rut

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Was in love with a girl who friend zoned me for years. She never gave me a chance to be with her, but made all the signs that she wanted that. I just want to die. I am a self hating and losing forest gump. She just got a new bf on facebook and it makes me hate her. She is still beautiful to me :(

>>23039427
>She is still beautiful to me :(

That's always the worst part.

I seem to attract the completely wrong type of guys, my emotionally abusive ex's really fucked me up good and now I'm in a relationship with a suicidal guy who I love more than anything but knowing he wants to kill himself cuts real deep. I don't feel appreciated and my parents put me down, I've been thinking about therapy but I just can't get myself out of bed to go ugh and when I write my shit down it seems so petty and stupid

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>transf 20
>hopelessromantic
>no boyfriend since birth
>tried talking to guys online
>gets easily attached
>always been taken for granted
>I'm just tired.jpeg
>I've been trying to be optimistic about things but there are times life hits me hard and It gets really sad and I'm just reaally reaally tired of it
>I just want someone to love me and to be happy


I'm slowly starting to accept the fact that I might actually grow old ; - ;
hnnng

>inb4 first post

>>23025764
You look so much like my best friend from HS who committed suicide a few years ago.
Whatever you do, don't do that, ok?

You don't have to have a perfect, normal past to have a solid future. I was a weird loner kid in HS, definitely never went to prom, had almost zero friends. After HS I took a couple years of working steady at a dead-end job and thinking a lot about the world and myself, figured out what I wanted, and proceeded to bust my balls working to attain my goals.

Now I'm 29 and in an Ivy League PhD program, doing work I love every day, with friends in places all over the world.
So just take some time to explore the world, figure out what you like, what grabs your interest, and who you want to be, and then bust your balls to become that person.
With effort, you'll succeed.

If you need a little support, skype: mischievous_munchkin

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>dad is a violent schizophrenic paedophile from a rough city
>my mum was also violent
>parents moved from Manchester to Taunton in 1981 because racist
>had my sister in '89 and me in '92
>used to beat me, lock me in cupboards and wash mouth out with soap when I was as young as 3
>had to watch and sometimes get caught inbetween parents physical fighting
>mum and dad divorced in '95
>mum took me and sister to Manchester women and childrens home
>met a guy called Frank
>he used to beat me and my sister, swung us by our ears until they bled
>dad found us and took us to Exeter
>sexually abused me, physically abused me, mentally abused me and verbally abused me
>used to go crazy a lot, heavy drinker. extremely violent
>dropped sister off at cop station in June of '97
>I'm with this crazy bastard until late '98
>go into care
>am withdrawn
>I molested kids when I was a kid (even living with my dad)
>my foster dad cheated on my foster mum so there were a lot of fights there
>foster dad has punched me on occasion
>I tried to fuck foster sister
>killed her hamsters and a dog
>pyromaniac
>thought about mass murder a lot
>thief
>vandal
>I attempted burglary once
>zoophillia

Stopped all the bad shit now though. I just go to work and come home... Boring, day in day out. I see a social worker now who thinks I'm too unstable for PTSD therapy

I want a girl who has been through similar... Though that's too much to ask

Kill me

>>23039596

If you need a listening ear or advice my kik is: peqout

>>23039527
If you can see a better life and won't take it because it requires getting out of bed, you have only yourself to blame.

That doesn't mean it's all hopeless and it's time to lie in bed and cry some more because you are worthless.
That means there is unlimited hope, because it is actually in your power to fix it. But you have to actually try. And when trying is really unpleasant and you hate it and want to give up, you have to eat it and keep trying. It's the only way to break the cycle.

Get up and go do stuff anon. That's an order.

>>23007558
Last week I went to my GP and got checked out. Got my first meeting with a psychologist on January 16th, really excited.

Spent last month curled up in a ball on my couch. Numbing myself with Netflix and weed. Eventually stopped responding to anyone. My mom and godparents came to my house eventually to check up on me. They were worried I might've anheroed. I wasn't suicidal but probably on my way there; I completely understand why some people are.

I've been dealing with depressive symptoms for 3 years now; but always managed to keep it to myself bcuz shame; couldn't be a more privileged person. Also might have ADD or adult ADHD, so that might tie in to my symptoms somehow. Also a 22yo virgin, so that doesn't help.

Been having good talks with my mom now. My dad has his own way of handling it; he's been talking to me a lot the past week; he just doesn't bring up my symptoms or the fact that I spent a month alone in my room. But it's alright; that's how our relationship has always been.

Been off weed for 10 days. Quite optimistic about the future now.

Reach out to your loved ones, and be safe :)

Hey m here 20 years old. Looking for anybody to talk to. Great listener.
Kik: ibuildrobots

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My life isn't that bad, I'm not involved in drugs, drinking. I'm doing pretty well off for myself for my age. I kept a good job, I'm going to a good school and I'm in the process of pursuing a degree that will guarantee me a job nearly anywhere.
I've spoken to men online before with the hope that they might be someone that might actually hurt me someday. It's not that I'm looking for sexual gratification or even anything like that. I just want something to change. I've gone out of my way to meet strangers hoping that they'd hurt me because I'm too afraid to hurt myself.
Complacency is a bore and I worry that I'll never settle into a life that will make me happy.

Have had depression for a few years now, only recently reached out for professional help, on my second anti-depressant now with no discernable difference, debating whether to give in and buy some blow after 5 months clean
My kik's KyaChan

>>23007558
Skype: vv.vv.522

>>23040486
What's your contact?

>>23040486
Not joking my story involves many of the same themes

>>23040901
Interesting... I'm just being an attention whore right now.

I don't really do much talking. Unless your a local qt girl I don't really care
Kik: Richardramirez74

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>>23007558
>can't find any girl to actually be friends with and maybe make something out of it
>depression getting to me lately
>no real friends irl
>online friends never want to chat with me anymore
>always fucking shit up when chatting with new people

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>>23007558


I never actually posted that sort of shit here but tonight I kinda of need it to let it out.

> be me, 26 y/o English teacher in France
> was in a serious relationship with high shcool love
> after 9 years of relationship where I tried to live up to her expectations she dumped me last May for her bassplayer
> Have to move up to the capital (across the whole country) for the job
> Only I get to do it alone now.
> ffwd 5 months, have become comfortably numb about girls, still get nightmares about her
> out of the blue, old forgotten crush messages me on Fbk
> we start talking 24/7
> all the usual shit, tennager level, texts & phone calls until late
> jokingly invites me to come & visit her in Lyon
> Why the fuck not, I accept.
> I can tell she's pleasantly surprised

Cont.

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>>23041009

> spend week-end with her
> do normie shit that actually makes me feel good
> movie, bar, zoo, being comfy at her place
> nothing happened, because don't wanna ruin it, but she's being very tactile & playful
> Sunday night arrives, have to go home.
> Get back to work feeling stupidly better for no reason
> Realise I actually think about that girl every idle moment I have
> Had not felt that since ex though I'd fucked some other random chicks
> Decide to grow some balls and go back to surprise her in Lyon next w-e
> Wednesday, take my train tickets, plan everything with a bro there
> It's the w-e before her bday so it's pretty neat from my perspective
> Friday arrives, I get to my bro's home and spend the night with him, planning on surprise her Saturday
> Late this very night she texts me "I wish I could go back to seven days ago..."
> Pretty much think the deal is sealed
> Saturday arrives
> Surpises works, she's happy and touched
> Unfortunately she had a friend over
> Becoolwithit.png
> Hang out with both girls until the friend finally goes back to her place
> When we're alone at her place, go for the kiss
> She doesn't resist
> However

> "I-Idon't know anon... I'm lost, all my relationships with guys seem to end up badly...I've been heart-broken too many times..." yaddi yadda
> Tells her I'm not perfect, just that I'm willing to try for her
> She keeps on being apolegetic & shit
> Leaves quietly Sunday morning while she stills sleeps
> She has not messaged me since, obviously making it clear she's too uncomfortable with what happened to consider talking to me again
> Waited a week to ask her "what now ?"
> Got mad at me when I started to ask if we were going to childishly ignore each other forever
> Had not felt interested in a girl since first love, gave her an honest shot, got BTFO'd and now went back to being lonely af & comfortably numb about anything.

>>23025901
I have a few friends who are/have transitioned. If you want to talk to someone who's very supportive of it, post your Skype or whatever

>>23041019
>>23041009
damn bro that really fucking sucks
i feel for you man
i say just give it some time, the ball is in her court
just try to keep yourself occupied in the meantime, she'll let you know as soon as she's able to

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>>23041080

Don't think she will, she left pretty upset at me and it's been 2 weeks already.
The way i see it, she'll find someone else (maybe even already has), just won't be me.

But thanks bro, warms my heart a bit.

>>23040534
i'm the anon you replied to and i just got back from work and this is the best thing i've heard all day, thankyou anon <3

>>23035132
Post your contact details, let's see if we click!

who else /can'tevenimaginenotbeinglonelythevastmajorityofthetime/ here?

>>23041142
<3

If you need some support, skype:
mischievous_munchkin

>>23007558
Been a shut-in loner for the past 3 or so years now. Fucked up sleep cycle, Lost motivation to find a relationship, introverted tendencies and lack of real life social skills. Other than Skyping some long-time online friends and occasional flights out to visit them i havnt made any new acquaintances in a while.

skype: ashley.knott1
Looking for new friends who enjoy games.

Is it at all possible to find love when you have no friends or connections? I'm so lonely and sad.

>>23042435
What's your skype?

>>23042461
I dont have one :(

>>23042481
iktf

No skype, no kik, just aim & icq.

yesterday was the 1 year anniversary of my father's death

i miss you dad

>>23040568

emotionally hurt? or physically hurt?

>>23007558
Dear all shut-ins, druggies, game addicts, mourning virgins and depressed couch potatoes,
Here is a selection from a recent NY Times article on the lives of frail, lonely old people. Take this lady's words as a warning, get up off your buns and force yourself to accomplish something in 2016. Start now -- accomplishments take time and effort.

>For some, their age came as a surprise. “I >don’t know, it just fell upon me,” said Helen >Moses, who turned 91 in October. “Your life >goes so quick, all of the sudden I’m 90 years >old. I remember when I was 13. I used to >come home for lunch every day. And I was >going down the hill and I said, Hey, I’m 13 >years old already.

>And here I am, 90.

>It’s all right.”

It won't be "all right" if you get that old and realize you wasted your whole life and it's too late. Most of you are young. Take heed.

>>23043859
it's why i'm so fucking depressed. i know nobody really ever liked me and i'm already too old to fix it.

the good news is there is way in hell i'll make it to 40 let alone 90

Jesus, this thread itself is depressing. Wish I could help all you people but I'm just a guy in a room with a laptop. Good luck guys

somewhat depressed, Idk what els to say
Skype niyren

1/?

im just going to type out whatever im feeling i dont care if its not necessarily readable i dont care i fucking want to die

i feel so fucking worthless and lonely and i wish i had someone to hold me and let me feel what its like to be loved

i've never had a real relationship with a girl before in my life. the only close thing i had was this girl i met on tumblr. i thirst followed her, and eventually we started talking and i learned that she liked me too and stuff. even though she lived in washington while i was in florida it was so fucking amazing knowing that someone out there really loved me and wanted to be intimate with me. for only about 2 months we were really close, we talked everyday, sent goodnight/goodmorning texts, texted eachother when we were drunk and high and missed each other and wished they were right next to us it was so wonderful, exchanged nudes often and called each other to talk about what we would do/where we would go when we would finally meet for the first time. for the first time in my life my Self as i knew it was finally being validated by someone who i also loved and i finally felt so happy.

and after two months of this fairy tale the texts started to die down, each conversation became a mere mirror of the one prior and she would do that thing where she wouldnt text back in like 5 days and it fucked with me emotionally and i started doing poorly in my classes, i wouldnt go out with my friends like i would and i blamed myself for everything. i felt angry at her for not communicating but i felt angrier at myself for committing some unknown sin against her and i remember crying to sleep days in a row because of how shitty i would feel. this trend continued on for about another two months until we finally had a fall out and our relationship stopped as i knew it stopped.

>>23044022
2/?

she wanted to remain friends and just keep talking but anytime we talk now its always so brief and so cold i know she doesnt give a single shit about me. i spent so long pondering about what i could have said or done to make her feel the way she did but to this day i cant do it i dont know and it scares me. i cant fucking recognize why she doesnt care for me anymore she wont tell me because its always some vague bullshit.

i miss that feeling of being loved and wanted and desired and intimate and i dont know if ill ever ge tthat again in 2 years of uni i havent made a single friend that i didnt already know and i just feel scared i want to die i wish i wasnt such a shitty socially awkward fuck up i wish i was nice and handsome and smart and attractive but instead i get to be some fucking weird fat fuck who has no social skills and i just want to die

i feel like ill never be able to feel that happiness ever again and i dont know if i want to keep living if thats the truth and i just wish i was next to her so much i loved her so much fuck me i i cant help it fnsdnkm

Kik: DanaMidori 20/F
Here if anyone wants to chat

21 years old and disabled.
Starting to really hit me that everything you are told growing up about being disabled is a lie.

People will treat you differently. You will be judged on sight. You wont be able to work your dream job. You arent just as good as everyone else, you are a lot different to other people.

Think im going through my sad teenage kid phase a little late lol

whatever who cares everyone here just wants to talk about themselves and feel special i just want to die like all of you im crying and dont know what to do about anything wooohoooooooooooooooo

>>23044116
>>23043981
What's wrong with you guys?

>>23044147
i dont know and you dont care my post was completely pointless

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I'm stumped.

Last Christmas, my girlfriend of 3-years cheated on me. Boo-hoo, yeah. Broke up with her and tried to move on with my life, which is hard since everyone around me suddenly got girlfriends. Suddenly, those who didn't were cheated on by their own girlfriends.

After I broke up with her, she moved away, whored herself out to other people, fucked this huge fucking faggot I briefly knew online, got into alcoholism and weed, apparently missed me while doing all this, and wants me to be hers again.

I missed her something fierce and still love her, but I feel like I'm only tempted to try giving her another shot because I have nobody else in the world I really connect with. She was the only one I could open up to, and I'm too goddamn awkward and scarred to trust someone after the one person I thought I could trust violated mine. I just feel like if I don't go for her, I'll be all alone with nobody to truly connect with.

I dunno what to do. I don't wanna be alone, but I don't know how to really approach people, be it IRL or online, and it's been eating at me for weeks. Bitches and whores, man.