I 'm in the middle of a funeral, I want to say something

read that one monologue from Hamlet

Who the fuck checks 4chan during a funeral?

>>8333751

What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you little bitch? I’ll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Navy Seals, and I’ve been involved in numerous secret raids on Al-Quaeda, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am trained in gorilla warfare and I’m the top sniper in the entire US armed forces. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the fuck out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me over the Internet? Think again, fucker. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across the USA and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You’re fucking dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that’s just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the United States Marine Corps and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the continent, you little shit. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little “clever” comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking tongue. But you couldn’t, you didn’t, and now you’re paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will shit fury all over you and you will drown in it. You’re fucking dead, kiddo.

>>8333773
Underrated

>>8333773
Holy shit did you just make this up?
>Gorilla warfare
Hahaha I get this reference, that dumb Harambe!

>>8333786
Fuck off

>>8333786
>ironic shitposting on /sci/

there's few boards where doing this would be any sadder

>>8333794
b-bbut I don't visit any other board anon

>>8333803
...were you actually serious?

try this


http://thankgodforevolution.com/node/1960

>>8333764
what monologue is that?

i'm curious

>>8333894
wait sorry I meant MacBeth, the "tomorrow and tomorrow and tomorrow" part

>>8333852
And what? I dont visit other boards either.

>>8333915
no I meant his other post, about "gorilla warfare" being a reference to harambe

>>8333751
Friends die
Fairies die
You yourself will also die
But Odin's splendor will never die
In honorable posthumous fame

>>8333915
Was this >>8333786
Post serious?

>>8333786
you must be new here

>>8333751
Say F

When the nigga you always roast on dies and you show up at his funeral and ask 4chan for more heat.

File: 1442163054761.jpg (40KB, 500x425px) Image search: [Google]

40KB, 500x425px

>>8333999

Checked for scientific accuracy.

That's your eulogy OP, now go deliver it.

Your relatives will always be with you, in Heaven and of Earth.

>>8333999
Fucking cringe

Conservation of energy, nothing ever actually goes away, we are made of stars, etc etc you get the idea

>>8333751
>"At least he's in a better place now. I mean, look at that coffin. If that's not comfy I don't know what is. My brother helped me write this speech. Thanks, Matt."