The best of /r9k/

>Having a shitty day
>This thread could cheer me up
>Open
>No posts
Aww.

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OP, will post what i've got
1/10

How to save that op then ask her for her number and write it on your hand
>Inb4 Chad
Nope I don't have the wits to do that in real time so I'm cyborg khv cyborg

>>39566624
Yeah, if you said something like
>Shit can I borrow your number too?
You'd get it with no problems

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>>39566666
nice digits susatan

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4/10
Not /r9k/ but autistic enough to have come from here

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hey, I have that same jacket!

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5/10
White: Jew? hope not

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I got this french cuck, who dared thinking it was his lucky day. A classic.

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7/7
I'll stop here, originality filter is killing me

>>39566614
How fat was that guy?

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dropping some shit
1/?

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>robot gets garlic bread

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>>39566666
checking these my guy

>>39566738
I want to befriend this guy so hard.

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Tard posts? Tard posts

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>>39567754
too low of content apparently

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I really need to organize these

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Got this one, where anon dates a hooker

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not /r9k/ but in the spirit of the thread

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>>39567808
hooker anon part 2

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>>39567826
hooker anon part 3

r9k during aprils fools was pretty comfy desu

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>>39567842
hooker anon part 4

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>>39567852
hooker anon part 5

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>>39567868
hooker anon part 6

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has anyone posted this yet? I remember this thread

>>39567033
I remember that thread. Was fucked if the OP aint joking

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>>39567882
hooker anon part 7

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>>39567891
hooker anon part 8

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>>39567900
hooker anon part final

doubt anyone will read all of it since itd take you like a day to read but whatever

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One of my favorites of all time.

>>39566844
you can have dry milk, it's literally powdered milk

so everyone in that pic other than the wet milk guy is an idiot

>>39567917
tldr what kind of feels im in for?

>>39568085
Cringy feels mostly, albeit a bit heart warming at times.

we r/4chan now

>>39568153
beats the usual r/cuckolding and /lgbt/ that pervades most of the sub

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This one always makes me chuckle. For what ever dumb reason

>>39567982
I'm lafing so hard I think I'm gonna delelop abs

What were some good recent happenings? All these are like a year old

>>39567982
Jesus fuck this one makes me feel so queasy every time I read it

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Saved this one. He sounded like a prophet

>>39567033
My favorite. It just gets funnier the more u stare and re-read

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>>39566666
Those are some serious digits right there son.

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>>39566645

More tranny fun

>>39567982
Just hope his dog got out ok

Bump. I need this thread lads. Shit is gold

>>39569235
Screencaps are definitely the best

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I have some that arent r9k but still gold.

>>39566666
God damn that is a nice set of numerals

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Here's a fresh one from yesterday's incest thread

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>>39566518
Wasn't in this one personally but I feel like it captures the essence of our predicament, so I'm posting it anyways.

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>I'm daaaaaaaa-ngerously cheesy

>>39567808
>>39567826
>>39567842
>>39567852
>>39567868
>>39567882
>>39567891
>>39567900
>>39567917
it was cute in a weird autistic way
so I hope that they lived happily ever after

Anybody got screencaps of that dumbass that got btfo yesterday and got his oneitis doxxed.

"My oneitis is going out with this spic...."

And his oneitis ended up being a spic herself. Lol.

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posting a real classic here desu

>>39566518
I don't keep the screen caps for long but

>sniff jizzer
>Olive Garden sperg
>20k shitter

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>>39569999
Seconding sniff jizzer if anyone has it.

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Screenshotted this shitter a while back

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>>39570073
>>39569999
Never mind, looks like I have it after all

>>39570161
Nice! Good save. It was funny when he came back on the next night and was sperging out at everyone.

>>39567917
>>39569828
If this is the marina chick if I remember her name correctly when I was reading these last year as the thread was happening. This story isn't real, sorry to burst your bubble. op eventually said it was made up but it was quite enjoyable nonetheless.

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Roasties still have yet to recover.

Does anyone have that kid who posted an uncensored Facebook convo and the girls nudes late last year?

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Worth the read, trust me.

>>39566645

>tfw no robot bf to comfort
A real women wouldnt even do that

>>39568085
A fellow robot has made it.
I guess some still have some hope.

>>39570161
Uh
Is this novel supposed to have a punchline?

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>>39566666
>mention numbers
>mention "get it with no problems"
>those digits
Nice gets anon.

>>39567033
the fucking "accidentally killed my sisters child"

>>39566747
kek, I remember this thread. Great times we had. We still have great times, from time to time.

>>39567917
read the whole thing.

i hope it worked out for the anon in the long run. he is truly one of us

>>39566683
That one is amazing. They're all good so far. Good stuff anon.

>>39570872
read the archive it is amazing

>>39570161
wtf it just ends with no closure REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

>>39567890
It's posted at least once a week, much like other garbage here. Report pastas and "Hey anon" and "what do you do" and racebait and they'll be banned from r9k eventually

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>>39567257
Jesus tapdancing Christ on a bike i've never laughed this hard in my entire life
thank you so much

>>39567033
Anyone got shots of that tread?

>>39571788
Don't matter. Found the Archive:
https://yuki.la/r9k/31498067

>>39570760
>>39571550
I seem to remember hearing that his life was ruined and possibly ended up an heroing.

>>39566666
quints!
epic my dude
CHECK EM HAHA
patbateman.jpg

>>39566954
i am devastated

>>39571816
that's not it tard

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>>39566666
Another (you) for fantastic digits man

>>39570554
Just read the whole shit. I doubt that this is real but fuck what a story.

Does anybody have the one with the guy who had the Garfield movie poster "It's all about meow" in his room?

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>>39566518
saved this one myself

>>39567273
a prime example of an omega male, he should've ruined the dinner and walked out.

>>39566738
I was "doublemint dave". I always had gum. Not to make friends (I already had them), but because my mom cared about dental hygiene and wanted me to chew xylitol gum after lunch.

>>39566614
>At University (college for you amerifags)
what did he mean by this?

>>39567273
If this actually happened, I just can't believe anyone like this exists. I'm sure it didn't. There's just no way.

>>39567033
>the difference between wojak posters and pepe posters

>>39573610
made me kek famalamadingdong

>>39572175
I am pleasantly surprised that that was an original post

>>39566614
JESUs Lost

>>39567808
>>39567826
>>39567842
>>39567852
>>39567868
>>39567882
This is great but it's way too fucking long

tl;dr plz

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I've been waiting for an opportunity like this...

>>39571788
>>39571816
https://archived.moe/r9k/thread/12819469/#q12819469

>>39567273
once he saw the dude he should've immediately left

>>39566518
Is there anyone besides me that remembers Gary Velvet-tongue?

>>39566666
Those aren't the only numbers you are getting anon

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don't know if this was already posted and its rnadom but here we go
>>39566666
and checked

>>39566954
fucking rollercoaster of emotion that was

>>39574467
What was a picture of Twilight doing in a playboy mag? Did he print out a pic of her and stick it in a magazine?

>>39566738
This is sweet. I wish the best for mark the mintman. His dad sounds endearing as well.

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>>39566954
Fucking hell. That's like a kick to the soul.

>>39570554
This is from 2013? I could have sworn that I read this story before I even knew what 4chan was.

>>39569808
fake but stilI funny

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Tempo
rare
Catfish
yuh

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Not from /r9k/ but probably one of the only interesting threads I'd ever seen on /trv/.

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>>39566666
Fantastic roll, my man.

>>39567917
Can I get a quick rundown? I can't read all that shit because it's a rollercoaster of things I won't get to experience in the near future

>>39571182
someone else posted it up here >>39574102

>>39575195
oops meant to link you, not myself >>39575359

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one i saved a little bit ago

>>39566954
Holy shit that last post, I couldn't stop laughing.

>>39570554
So amazing. Glad everything turned out right for Anon

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>>39566666

Fookin nice roll mate

>>39566954

What kind of a loser posts kc screencaps on /r9k/?

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>>39566614
i know for a fact this is fake
no way anyone could experience that and not kill themselves, or at the very least change schools

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Here's a banner I made from a post I capped here a while ago, I think it's pretty good.

>>39566666
Praise kek. kek just gave you his digits anon

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>>39566666
Nice digits my man fuckin quints

>>39567887

>pic

Into eternity, brother.

This thread is the reason I visit this site.

>>39575927
dont visit this site

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>>39567033
i remember the lead up to that thread, OP spoke about how he accidentally say on his sisters child and it hasnt woken up since. Didnt even realise there was a follow up thread l m o a

>>39569778

This was probably the most pertinent thing ever posted on this shithole board.
I wonder what kind of response it would get if it were posted today.

>>39574996
Read about half of these, but I call bullshit. Standing up women is not a crime. The fuck the police gonna do?

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>some of my best memories are from 4chan threads
A feel I didn't really expect to have 12 years ago.

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>>39566666
'mirin dem digits

>>39576087
i have never thought of it like that before and for the first time i want to kms

>>39574102
>https://archived.moe/r9k/thread/12819469/#q12819469

That's disappointing. Just 2 posts from OP basically saying "sat on baby, killed it" and every dumb cunt just believes it.

If there was proof it was real then THAT would be epic. And hilarious.

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ya winnin son

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this thread was fucking insane

>>39574928
Yeah feels weird, I remember a friend told me about it a long time ago.

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I remember this one after so much time, the raw emotion in it just sticks to me

>>39575083

can this even be real
nobody would be such denial

>>39576467
Bitch deserves it.
Goodnight roastie.

>>39576467
this one definitely sounds 110% real

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>>39573243
>just yell P-P-PLATYPUSSY

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>the state of class clowns

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man this filter's a pain, cant i just image dump

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Used to like this guy's threads.

https://pastebin.com/u/TopPopOne

https://vocaroo.com/i/s0nv7WF8OjhY

I have to wonder what happened to him.

>>39575083
This hurt so much. Poor guy doesn't even realise it

>>39574704
Because it's made up, I dont know why you think ponyfags wouldnt straight fabricate shit

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>>39566666
very nice digits

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>no threads of me so far when I had my mental; breakdown and posted my emo(cutting) pictures

>>39577083
Those threads sucked if you're who I think you are. Not worth reminiscing about.

>>39567917
I'm going to read all of it because sunk cost fallacy from reading the first one, this had better be worth it Anon.

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>>39577155
apparently it's a fake story

>>39570554
Thank you very much for uploading this. Peace!

>>39566666
I hereby acknowledge that you got post number with a certain uncommon set of digits.

>>39566954
>Bernd
>kein Bernd

I do not understand these ancient memes.

>>39576467
I came here to laugh not be disappointed in robots

>>39567033
I remember this thread holy fuck it was gold

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>>39577260
holy shit anon thank you for that i haven't keked that hard in a long time

>>39577483
krautchan
german 4chan
>also
fuck off newfag

>>39566954

I genuinely feel bad for that guy , what a bunch of cunts , they could have been cordial at least

>>39567766
unreadable

>>39578154
>unreadable
Have you tried not being retarded? I can read it just fine.

>>39566666
Holy moly nice digits there bud

>>39570554
I swear this had a different ending where he either receives a written note saying or gets called "bible shitter" after starting a new life and thinking he had escaped his past.

>>39566666
Delicious digits there my friend.

A bit more reading than your average greentext story, but this truly is the best story ever told on r9k

https://pastebin.com/wrXUhtWz

>>39567273
this level of cringe
it hurts

>>39569719
my soul died a little reading this

>>39570885
>>39566747
does anyone have the thread screencap of this?

>>39567917
this was really fucking nice.OP is great at articulating weird ticks that you think are unique to yourself. like waiting a while and doing something else before reading a text as if to reward yourself with the text. fucking reliable and a great read

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I laughed so hard because of this

>>39567982
Does anyone have this archived?

>>39577696
Repost pls anon

>>39568085
op is a good fucking writer who expresses weird eccentricities and social observations really nicely. a good read esp if you're in the mood for romantic feels.

>>39570554
Absolutely amazing if true, well worth the read.

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Roasties will always be btfo

>>39567917
Was there ever any followup?

>>39570295
That's some serious dedication to making stuff up

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>>39570161
>>39571550
>>39570760
Here is the better version of the snifflejizzer

>>39566518
anyone have any slurpdad? pissed I never saved them because they're basically lost to time.

>>39566614
Haven't laughed like that in a while.

>>39567814
Oh boy that gave me a good laugh

>>39581085
Someone post the pics

>>39567917
This could be an actual novel tbqh. I stayed up until 4am reading this. I like all of the parts where he describes something small in huge detail or some little thing that he does and the reasons behind it. Just a good story.

>>39573370
as a brit i thought americans solely used "college" to refer to the place you go after high school but it seems you use college and university interchangeably
we only say uni here, college means a lot of other stuff though

>>39582429
College and University are two different places here in the US and Canada

>>39582429
College is a place without a graduate program, for instance community colleges. If it offers undergrad but is also a research university, it is a university.

>>39567826
IM FUCKING MAD AT OP NOW JESUS MAKE A FUCKING MOVE

I was there for the Jessi Slaughter shit

good times

>>39583184
read the circled part backwards

>>39581085
>>39581539
if youre one of the cum-guzzlers who makes these comps please follow the second example reading those big ones is always cancer why even make it like that going to set it as a destkop background you faggot

>>39583220
fuck, how did i miss that


wadawd

>>39566747
One of the few epic threads I was actually in.

>>39576066
Sexual harassment is a word of power anon.

>>39579183

I read it all and don't regret it

>>39579183
>>39584139
me neither, GOAT story imo

>>39567033
What's up with those Jessica wojaks? Where did they come from? Saw a ton in r34

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>>39566666

i witnessed this event twice in my life
am i god now

>>39569964

Can someone explain to me what is the deal with eating eggs? what will happen if she eats this many?

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>>39584575
The /mlp/ one million get. It broke 4chan, over 2000 replies.

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i got a few, will post more

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>>39584848
paper mammaries

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Effin bullshit

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>>39584866
we don't take kindly to textless posts around here

satan himself

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>>39584880
dumb roastie wasting perfectly fresh quads

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>>39574996
>"it says ever seen the hunger games?"