"All alone on a Friday night? Hey, how about you buy me

how about you show me those tiddies lol

>>39308974
be my khaleesi

open bob & show vagania

>>39308974
frig off roastie

>>39308974

What in Davy Jones' locker did ye just bark at me, ye scurvy bilgerat? I'll have ye know I be the meanest cutthroat on the seven seas, and I've led numerous raids on fishing villages, and raped over 300 wenches. I be trained in hit-and-run pillaging and be the deadliest with a pistol of all the captains on the high seas. Ye be nothing to me but another source o' swag. I'll have yer guts for garters and keel haul ye like never been done before, hear me true. You think ye can hide behind your newfangled computing device? Think twice on that, scallywag. As we parley I be contacting my secret network o' pirates across the sea and yer port is being tracked right now so ye better prepare for the typhoon, weevil. The kind o' monsoon that'll wipe ye off the map. You're sharkbait, fool. I can sail anywhere, in any waters, and can kill ye in o'er seven hundred ways, and that be just with me hook and fist. Not only do I be top o' the line with a cutlass, but I have an entire pirate fleet at my beck and call and I'll damned sure use it all to wipe yer arse off o' the world, ye dog. If only ye had had the foresight to know what devilish wrath your jibe was about to incur, ye might have belayed the comment. But ye couldn't, ye didn't, and now ye'll pay the ultimate toll, you buffoon. I'll shit fury all over ye and ye'll drown in the depths o' it. You're fish food now, lad.

Now feck off u wench

>>39308974
N-N-N-N-No thanks, I have plans for tonight, like p-p-p-p-p-playing Falput New Vegas, b-b-b-b-b-ut thanks for asking.

>>39308974
Only if the next 5 are on you

>>39308974
For fucks sake stay away from me

I'm just headed out, sorry
>chug entirety of beer I just ordered and leave

File: IMG_2453.png (377KB, 616x587px) Image search: [Google]

377KB, 616x587px

>>39309117
Sounds about right there boyo

File: 1461858586777.png (14KB, 800x450px) Image search: [Google]

14KB, 800x450px

>>39308974
only if you originally buy me one

>>39308974
>"Barkeep, two diet cokes here, please."

>>39308974
Whats the problem of buying a girl a drink and chat a bit? If you want to you will probably nail her...

>>39308974
do I look like a fuckin vending machine?

No thanks Milady, the only female company i keep is my 55yo mother.

>>39310637
Nothing is particularly wrong. Just like anteing up for a round of poker. Chasing women can become just as much of a vice as poker can though.

>>39308974
Sorry, I just spent the last of my money on beer.
*leave a tip and leave*

>>39308974
"uh how about you buy your own drink you fucking cunt"

also I loved you in game of thrones, shame that's all you'll ever be knwon for, don't blow it all on cocaine too early!

"Hey bar guy, can I get your most alcoholic cocktail? and the roastie will have a glass of tap water, thanks"

>>39311181
I love her even outside of game of thrones.

>tfw no qt Emilia Clarke gf

Life sucks.

>>39308974
Damn, lady. You can lose your dog in that cleavage of yours.

>O-ok then
>Reaches hand to shake hand
>realizes beer is in hand
>oops haha
>drop beer to shake hand
>grab hand violently
>run away out of the room

>>39308974
>buying drinks for roasties

I'm going to end up staying for some headcanon pretend shit while dealing with pain that does get somewhat annoying. It's so not worth it and i don't give a shit about anything else going on here fml

>>39308992

first reply best reply

oh god, why i am laughing so hard at this

>>39308974


I'm sorry. I'm obviously in the way of the person behind me who you are speaking to.


Sorry for the confusion. Let me buy you both a drink and I'll switch him chairs

>>39308974
how 'bout you buy yourself a drink, bitch

>>39308974
FUCK OFF DRAGON ROASTIE YOUR CHARACTER SHOULD HAVE DIED LAST SEASON REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

>>39308974
Let me tell you about the camwhore I orbit

>>39308974
Do girls actually approach guys and say this? I'm new to this, help me out.

>>39308974
Let me pet your dragon and then we'll talk

>>39311675
nope
it's just a fantasy to get some (You)s

>>39311675
My wife asked me out on our first date. I'd never once spoken to her before that.