>be me, 28, first month on job as a cop (in b4 "pig")

File: ci_2801.jpg (33KB, 400x600px) Image search: [Google]

33KB, 400x600px

>be me, 28, first month on job as a cop (in b4 "pig")
>see teenage punk driving with obvious giant brown beer bottle
>ohboyherewego.jpg
>flash lights, pull him over
>"son do you know what I'm stopping you for"
>cause I'm young and I'm black and my hat's real low "s-sir I can explain, this is root beer"
>oldest trick in the book, also has the oldest counter in the book
>"oh well then I guess you don't mind if I take a swig, then"
>this is how you get away with drinking beer on the job, an old sargent told me in the academy
>take swig
>it's actually root beer
>notpartoftheplan.jpg
>no idea what to do at this point, since I was planning on arresting him for DUI
>do I just hand the bottle back to him and tell him to go on his way? confiscate the bottle? ticket him for something?
>"just bluff your way with confidence and authority" I hear my academy instructor in my head talking about verbal confrontations.
>confidence mode activated
>"you're free to go" I say in my best man-voice
>I waddle back to my squad car with bottle in hand
>just get in, drive off without another fucking word or eye contact
>the kid's still pulled over by the road in my rearview mirror as I drive off with his rootbeer
>he might still be there
>mfw I stole root beer from a kid