>2017 >Not having a security job Im browsing 4chan and

>>39201884

That sounds pretty bad ass. Maybe I would consider getting one as a weekend job.

>>39201907
Im doing it full time until i start something better. Its ultra comfy, especially night shifts. I just have to let in mailmen and delivery people on rare occasions, maybe answer an email to adjust someones access rights. Its piss easy

>>39201884
how do you get a job like this? I've seen security postings but they always talk about patrolling and stuff. what's a giveaway that it'll be a comfy position?

>>39201966

I already have a pretty cushy job. I would do what you do maybe one night a week, on Friday.

>>39202094
Op is a liar. Most security jobs require patrolling low income apartments and the like. Very rarely will you be stationed at am abandoned building every night.

>>39202213
most of the ones around here seem to involve patrolling factories and industrial complexes

>>39202094
I applied with g4s, got lucky with getting a position in the command center. Even the ones with patrols have lots of downtime

>>39201884
>IT helpdesk
>/nightshift/
>2 other people in the building
>~1 call per hour
>watch movies and phonepost all night
>weekends off
fuck the dayshift I'll never go back

>>39202440
Thats essentially what this job turned out to be, 90% of the job is managing access rights of employees

>>39201884
oh yeah? what happens when someone breaks in? whatchu gon do now?

>>39202531
lol 90% of what I do is hand out new passwords

back when i worked in security all these comfy positions were being held by guys who have been holding them for years and were usually buddies with the managers. ordinary robot schmucks with no confidence are going to be stuck standing at some shitty hotel or restaurant for 12 hours a day and their feet begging to be chopped off

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>>39201884
>too small and skinny to make a security guy
kill me

>>39202568
Call the police and stay in my office.
Also there are like 5 other security guards that patrol individual buildings.

>>39202571
Kek, i just activate or deactivate badges for pajeets that forget theirs

>>39201884
What do you mean? Sitting behind a computer all night long monitoring CCTVs? That does sound comfy but 1) they might check on what shit you browse and 2) what if something actually happens

>>39202609
In all honesty I hated nights when I started but then I realized it's perfect for me. I don;t have aspirations to ((((move up in the company)))) so it's the right level of involvement for me. It doesn't even really feel like "work" anymore.

>>39202577
This is my first security job m8, i dont know anyone here. Moved to this state last september

>>39202606
M8 im as unthreatening as they come. Security nowadays is specifically supposed to not touch suspects

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>>39201884
I'm a 5'1 femlet security guard in retail. Been doing it for two years.

K I L L M E

>>39202634
Pretty much.
1.) Im on my phone and we are allowed to use the wifi for entertainment.
2.) All i do is call popo and other guards

>>39202652
Nighttime is best time

Security job where I live means driving around from place to place, securing buildings and having to fight drunks and other crazies.

Won't say the company I work for because if I badmouth investigative division will pick it up if some anon on here shows this post to them.

basically was working for 11 an hour at a high end condo catering to rich fags one pitched a fit when I asked it to walk it's dog through the side not the front got me fired asap

Now I make minimum. working is never comfy but I'm glad I have this because it's tolerable. Anything else I'd break down.

Remember it's still work its not some dream job or even nice you're over glorified customer service and you're always wrong. No guarantee of a good site. Take the night shift if possible and just work full time.

>>39202667
>retail
You made a mistake.

Security for offices is where its true comf

>>39202606
They hire anyone. Old black cunt the size of a wrecking ball who can't make it up the stairs gets hired.

>>39202712
>having to fight drunks and crazies
Armed or unarmed. If unarmed I call BS. at least where I live it's duty to retreat.

>>39202689
So how and when can you go to the bathroom though?
Also since you seem to answer questions how many chances are there to have that as a daytime job? I'm not a night person at all

>>39201884
yeah but what if you have to confront a rowdy nigger or drunk?

>>39202776
Unarmed. They may have instructions to avoid fighting but it's not like that's how it works in reality.

>>39202832
Also it's ridiculous that guards would have to retreat. They should be treated as essentially mercenaries.

>>39202780
Whenever i want. Im unsupervised.

Ive done day shift here, there were plenty of openings. Day shift means dealing with more people, and in my case its when I have to answer more emails and phone calls. still easy

>>39202798
"Sir leave private property etc" then I call the police

>>39202859
Good. But if you take too long to take a shit who's going to monitor the CCTVs?

>>39202849
>as essentially mercenaries
you don't work security do you anon. This isn't blackwater or whatever the fuck they are now. What state?

>>39202859
Btw what kind of specifics do they expect you to have and is the pay good, OP?

>>39202885
It doesn't matter whether or not I do. They still should be treated as mercenaries. What good is a guard that runs away? Why should they run away? It makes no sense.

>>39202849
We are told to retreat, we have the arrest rights of citizens. Aka we can only do shit if theyre doing a felony.

Anything less and both we and the company get fucked. The sole purpose of unarmed security is to keep the company OUT of the courtroom

>>39201884
What'll you do once someone tries to break in with a gun?

>>39202898
So why even have guards?

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>>39201884
>mfw history of schizophrenia, major depression, and ptsd that gets "triggered" (what the doc calls it, don't kill me) at random
>mfw can't get any job ever in life
>M F W going into assisted living

>>39202776
Wrecking balls are actually pretty small 0

>>39202897
holy shit you're fucking retarded, you have no idea what security does or how it works. DDR. Look it up. "It doesn't matter" of course it matters because now we know you don't know jack shit and you're just telling lies.

Roleplay posters like you are the worst. There are tons of them but jesus fuck can't you just be honest and say "I feel like security guards should be the equivalent of mercenaries, what are guards actually like?"

>>39202877
Nobody, if stuff happens while youre shitting ye get fugged

>>39202894
You need to have at least 20/30 corrected vision and enough hearing for conversations (I would fail at both w/o glasses and hearingnaid)
You have to do first aid training and shit for 3 days, and if they do vehicle patrols you need a license obviously

Pay depends on the client. I make 10 bucks in michigan

>>39202960
Where the fuck did I lie about anything you fucking piece of shit? Where the fuck did I roleplay? Fucking liar. Fuck you.

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>>39202717
I like the thrill of catching shoplifters, at Macy's we're allowed to full-blown tackle them AND use handcuffs. There's zero mercy, no "just off with a warning, you get booked and cops take you away. It's the one store chain you should never steal from.

Hell, the security office had our own break room and bathroom. Sadly we didn't have a holding cell built yet....so we handcuff them and sit them in the kitchen. At least we had wireless hidden cameras to spy on suspicious employees, then set them up to steal. It's not against the rules and was fun.

>>39202991
>setting up people to steal

What the actual fuck? Why would you want a coworker to do that and ruin their life?

>>39202905
Call police and record it, let others on site know. Thats it.

>>39202930
Liability stuff, discourage trespassers, make sure police are able to respond quickly. And like i said earlier, do all i can to prevent lawsuits

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FUCK YOU GOYS
I fell for the mailman meme and now i'm forced to walk up and down 800 houses a day carrying 40 pounds of mail or else my parents will kick me out.

>>39202984
"I fight drunks and crazies"
t.15 year old who wants (yous)
>>39202712
Found your original post kid. You can stop throwing the "f-word" around it doesn't make you look cool. You don't fight anyone. Your mother telling you to clean your room and you replying okay mom, is the closest to a real fight you've ever had.

>>39203036
your cankles tell me you're obese or fat, at least you're getting exercise fatty

>>39202991
That sounds fun anon, but that would be illegal in this state. Shoplifting is a misdemeanor

>>39203065
read the post you fucking retard.

>>39203030
I'm sure employees feel safe knowing that when there's the trouble the """guards""" will just bail.

>>39203061
Where the fuck did I say I fight anyone, you fucking liar? What the fuck is your problem?

>kid
I'm older than you, you fucking liar. You fucking psychopath piece of fucking shit.

>You don't fight anyone.
I NEVER FUCKING SAID I DID YOU FUCKING RETARD.

>>39203028
It's to weed out the bad employees. Like we'd place a necklace in the stock room and hide the camera by it, constantly watching it until someone took the bait and pocketed it. It's not my fault they're an asshole. We did this a lot with the Godiva chocolate bars we sold by the registers, and of course they'd have to pay for anything they stole.

Three times the amount to be precise, go tell your shoplifting friends.

>>39201884
I fuckin keep telling these people security is a comfy job
I'm happy you're happy

>>39202982
>I make 10 bucks in michigan
Can you afford decent living? I'm not a burger.
Also, are you hired directly by the client or do you work in a firm that has different clients? How do you signal the employer you want the comfy CCTV instead of the patrolling post?

>>39203074
I did read the post you retarded retard
I said at least you're getting exercise fatty

>>39203079
Thats unfortunately what they tell us to do. We can and should try to get our clients out of harms way, but we arent obligated to put our health on the line

>>39202859
ok but what if you have to confront a rowdy ghost?

https://youtu.be/n07myucGOGk

"e-e-excuse me g-g-g-ghost, this is p-privet p-property" kek

>>39203079
"Heh...I'll show him, I'll use 'fuck' so many times he'll stop replying!"
MOM I POSTED IT AGAIN!
t. Role playing anon.

Seriously though chill. I dont judge if you Wanna pretend you fight do it on /b/ most high schoolers go there.

Okay 16 not 15. probably delayed development thanks to your autism.

>>39203093
tfw someone doesn't pay the civil demand so manager decides to make an example of them and asks corporate to pursue. Ecstasy.

>>39203154
>t. Role playing anon.
I NEVER "ROLE PLAYED" ANYWHERE YOU FUCKING LIAR. I NEVER CLAIMED TO FIGHT ANYONE ANYWHERE YOU FUCKING LIAR. FUCKING PIECE OF FUCKING SHIT SUBHUMAN.

>Okay 16 not 15. probably delayed development thanks to your autism.
I AM OLDER THAN YOU AND I DON'T HAVE AUTISM YOU FUCKING LIAR.

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>>39203069
Hmm don't live in New York then, and although it's fun it's too dangerous. My store was in an average area but we'd have people fighting us every week, and the junkies were batshit crazy. It's hard to get punched in the face and not be allowed to punch them back. I quit and changed conpanies. I only got shoved once but a thug pulled a weapon on me.

I saw him running out and he looked dangerous so there was no way in fuck I was stopping him alone, yet as I was backing out of his path he reached into his inner jacket pocket to stab me

>>39203098
Barely above min wage, but i get by. Some clients pay more.

I work for G4S security, they assign to a client.

>>39203150
I fuck it, standard procedure for dealing with monsters

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>>39203154
If they don't pay on the spot it gets billed to their house as a regular legal bill.

Avoiding paying your bills isn't the best move. Just pay upfront and get it over with. Also you're not even allowed to keep the item you stole!

Pure Kek when I get to tell them that

>>39203179
Dude calm down do you have BPD or something?

>>39203189
Do you live in nyc? Thankfully nobody wants to rob corporate offices, no cash here

>>39203252
YOU ARE THE ONE FUCKING TELLING LIES ABOUT ME FOR NO FUCKING REASON YOU FUCKING RETARD.

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>>39203113
STOP SCREAMING AT ME YOURE NOT THE BOSS OF ME

>>39203266
The other poster wasnt me mate, Im the OP.
Sir, Im going to have to ask you to leave. This is a private thread. If you dont comply I will call the police.

>>39203266
You're a cunt. Stop yelling.

>>39203284
are you alright there buddy, you seem a bit mad at me for no reason. Look, don't get me wrong, I'm glad your getting exercise but in no way am I screaming at you.

>>39203300
>>39203305
WHY ARE YOU BLAMING THIS FUCKING SHIT ON ME? WHAT THE FUCKING FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU FUCKING CUNTS?

>itt anon has an autism spurg

getting a job is hard

doing a job with major depression is harder

not relapsing back into neet and planning your suicide is harder

>>39203343
Jesus Christ lol what wrong with you.

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>>39203252
No just Long Island suburbs. I saw on the news that last night a guy tried robbing a local thrift store at gun point, so the manager grabbed her shotgun while employees beat him up until police arrived. He's bloodied up in his mugshot with a bandage on his head.

That's the best thing about owning your own store, no policy for criminals

>>39203414
YOU ARE BLAMING THIS SHIT ON ME, HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT MEAN THERE IS SOMETHING WRONG WITH ME? FUCKING RETARD SUBHUMAN CUNT FUCKFACE.

>>39203386
This job is browsing the internet and glancing at cameras.

>>39203414
This man is an ascended robot, we normies cant comprehend him

Well I was going to say that I'm a 5'5" manlet and wouldn't make a credible security guard.

But then I realized they hire women, so I guess I have no excuse.

>>39203420
That sounds great. Strange that a lib state like NY allows it

>>39203484
The most experienced guard here is a 5'4" woman in her 60s

>>39201884
how much u get, 11/hr?

>>39203775
Ten. I just started, first security job

>>39203806
what do you do if something bad actually happens?

do you kick out skateboarders or just not give a fuck?

>>39203806
were the classes hard? i currently work overnight at walmart and get 11.21/hr and have heard that security gets 11. but enlighten me, when do the pay raises come in? or is it destined to be 11-15 dollars an hour

>>39203842
Call popo or other guards.

>>39204124
Easy, basic stuff with quizzes. You can look at the material while quizzing.

Dunno about raises, im new

>>39204538
alright, you may not be able to answer this aswll since u are new, but do u think this would be a career path that could sustain living? like u can move out on your own and have a decent (not in the ghetto) apartment/house

>>39204941
House, fuck no. Studio apartment? Sure.
This isnt really a career unless you become a well-trained armed security guard or are ex-military