Did anyone else here fuck up and try to become an artist? Also

>>39123591
i want to become a fisherman but i know i would fail

>>39123591
I've been trying to get started on this story I want to write but I can't find the motivation to do it.

>>39123591
i want to play the trumpet but im to scared I'll fail

>>39123591
>learn about being an artist in 6th grade
>learn about being a musician in 7th grade
>start trying to be an artist
>get accepted to art high school somehow
>make music when I'm home
>my art skills don't advance
>start getting more serious about music
>get kicked out of art school in 11th grade
>give up on being an artist
>fail 12th grade
>near the end of 13th I realise I might not make it as a musician
>start trying to design clothes
>realise I'm not popular enough online to even have a chance
>recently realize there's no way I can make it in this world doing music
>literally the only thing I'm capable of
>even the idea of working 9-5 makes me stressed out, more depressed, more suicidal, and overwhelmed
I'm doing one last album, then I might just an hero.

It also doesn't help that
>live with parents
>I might be depressed enough/possibly autistic to qualify for disability
>they won't support me getting on disability
>everyone on my dad's side would look down on me for it
>my mom wouldn't support that, her family couldn't give a shit less about me

>>39123591
Fail hard enough and one day you might lead Germany

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>enjoy vandalism
>start painting graffiti
>take art classes in school
>parents tell me it's hard to make it as an artist
>ignore them
>take art classes in college
>do a few graffiti commissions
>parents tell me I'm wasting my time
>they finally break me
>quit college
>take nearly 10 years to sort a new career in construction (my dad is in construction)
>still wish I was an artist
>still paint graffiti now

>>39123656
Fail howso?

>>39123653
What's the story about?

>>39123616
As a hobby? Or fishing as a career?

I spent 2 years studying animation only to realize I can't get a job because I'm too autistic to market myself

People who feel this way are generally depressed Tumblr types. If you actually want to be an artist do it, but you probably won't because most depressed Tumblr types are actually pussies.

>>39123728
Yikes. Failed musician robot here, I know the feeling. Have you considering animating as working as a studio for somebody else? Alot of YouTube channels outsource to other animators

>>39123750
It's not that easy. The music scene is a dumpster fire right now, and only elites in certain social scenes and regions can make it in the visual arts

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>always loved history
>didn't feel like teaching or being an author
>always read and hear about how archivists are needed everywhere and how it's gonna get even worse with boomers retiring
>sounds nice
>graduate with info science bachelor's
>the jobs just downright stop existing with all the budget slashes going on everywhere
>become a welder

I wish I could have these years of my life back.

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I started in March working for myself on my creative things and made $400.. since March.

>>39123849
How are you affording living? Welfare?

>>39123751
I'm just not cut out for freelance work
there is too much communication and dealing with money and taxes and all that shit
I need a job where I have a boss and am just told what to do and get a regular paycheck at the end of the month, a mcjob basically

ill always remember this one highschool friend of mine. His father was a banker and wanted to get him on the family bussiness but he told his dad to fuck off and now draws Pokemon art on deviantart. What a fucking guy.

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>>39123911
Was saving for 2 years. Some housing assistance and the occasional senpai bump.
But it still feels horrible. Like I am racing with time and myself.

>>39123727
>what's the story about

A family that lives way up north in the arctic. It follows a kid who tries to understand why his parents are so cold to him throughout his youth.

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I tried to become a teacher.

>2nd/3rd year at uni
>get to point of student-assistant teacher
>get call one day at school
>Anon you failed this one exam and will need to retake it
>surr no problem
>have a lesson to teach in 10 minutes
>get in car and go home
>Ignore calls
>answer phone a few weeka later
>Is this Anon? We have his number listed as this one
>Anon? Nope you must have the wrong number

That was in in 2013 or so I have been a NEET since that day. I have not called or emailed the university, to this day and don't know if I am supposed to pay them back or not.

>>39123591
I'm actually trying to be an artist right now although I have a backup plan. What kind of artist were you trying to be op? I'm aiming for commercial art like concept art, comics and illustration. Are you comfortable sharing any work?

>>39125138
I varied between landscape painting, abstract painting, abstract illustration, and cartoons. 4th reply in this thread is a greentext of what happened with me

>>39125313
Ah I missed that. Damn that sucks man. You should keep making music if it makes you happy though. I'm also depressed af and have a shit ton of problems but sometimes when I'm in the zone and draw for a few hours it all just goes away.

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>>39123591
I guess I've failed at two careers at this point, the first was my absolute dream career of being a game dev, I have nothing that makes companies want to hire me and every time I've tried to just go the indie route I get frustrated by my lack of skills and my inability to learn basic shit that others just breeze right over my pile of buggy ass partially finished games constantly haunts me. The other is music I'm just too autistic to find a band again for a long time I was in one with one of my only friends and once we broke up we talked for a long time again about putting a new one together before deciding it was pointless since we had never gone anywhere with the previous one and the chances of us going anywhere with the next one would be just as low considering we're in a terrible area for music and making a living off of it would be practically impossible.

>>39123701
>>I might be depressed enough/possibly autistic to qualify for disability
>>they won't support me getting on disability
>>everyone on my dad's side would look down on me for it
>>my mom wouldn't support that, her family couldn't give a shit less about me
iktf I'm certain I could get on disability for autism or my constant anxiety but my parents don't believe in mental issues at all and would disown me the second I tried

>>39123591
>failed as a painter

just dont go into politics lmao
or go

Well im actually pretty damn good at art but having like an art account or something stresses me so much i cant do it :/

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>leave school
>no idea what I want to do
>parents are typical "you can do anything you want!!" so i have no direction whatsoever
>love vidya
>decide to become game designer
>join games development college course (UK college, no US college)
>end up being pretty fucking good at 3d modelling
>2 years of that, then go to uni to do 3d modelling and animation course
>realise mid way through the first year just how badly I'm wasting my time on this meme degree
>drop out at end of year
>lose interest in vidya
>spend the next 5 years being a worthless NEET with no direction, ambition of self belief
>finally at 26 getting my shit together to get A levels and go to uni to do engineering
>fortunately I only wasted 1 year so gubmint will still fund the full course

Never EVER fall for the art degree maymay. I have literally wasted 10 years doing fuck all. Like 16 year old me could have done what I'm doing right now and be 10 years in front of current me.

I am currently trying to be a software engineer but almost feel like quiting because I suck but so does everyone else here.

>>39123591
In communications (not the computer type lol) just waiting for the chinese to pull out of real estate in australia so the economy collapses so I can go back to nz without shame and a farmer or kill myself with opiates. I dont want anything anymore (25yr old, no gf)

>>39128028
What are the Chinese doing to Australia?
>>39127780
Also this is so true. People are often afraid to take time off to discover what they enjoy after high school, but I REALLY wish I had. Instead I majored in an art because some dumb fucking counselor told me to just do what I was passionate about even though I was 18 and only passionate about hentai and jerking off. I didn't find out what I wanted to do with myself until a year after I'd graduated, and once you get your four year degree you can kiss financial aid for future education goodbye.

>>39128108
>told me to just do what I was passionate about
Fatal error of parents and teachers/counsellors alike. Kids are fucking stupid at making life decisions at an early age, they just want to fuck around and play games. The parents job is to guide the child to set them up for a decent career in something they are good at. If you give them free reign of course they're going to choose some dreamy, unprofitable shit like art or music.

Pisses me off, I try not to blame anyone else for my life situation but for fucks sake, if my parents had instead of just plying me with video games had took an interest in my schooling, guided me, gave me treats for good work rather than just infinite sweets and video game time then maybe I wouldn't be so much of a fuck up now. Rather than just waiting until the end of school to say "what do you mean you don't know what to do??? Pick something!"

>>39128546
my parents tried to give me direction and my vidya as a kid was very limited but I still have no idea where I'm going

>>39128108
literally every new house and block of flats is being bought up by chinese people before it even goes on the market. they then sell them to other chinese as luxury apartments and shit.

this is why houses cost so much goddamn money for a shitty one in the city. i dont blame the chinese though, if i lived in china i would do everything in my power to get out of there pronto

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>graduate high school
>do literally nothing for the next entire year but play vidya every waking hour
>mom gets fed up and tells me to either go to college or join the military
>I'm a dumbass so I settle for military
>put into delayed entry program for the Marine Corp
>months of fucking brutal running
>2 weeks before I'm supposed to go to boot camp I finally realize shit is real and get out of it to go to an over-priced music production school
>slowly realize school is shit when I learn things on youtube that isn't covered in the school until a literal year later
>of course get rejected by girls the entire time I'm there while my roommate and neighbors fuck hot girls the whole time
>every single other person I meet at the school is better at the entire enterprise than I am. better musicians, better producers, better "networking" skills
>decide to say fuck it and drop out after getting worthless associates degree
>join online school and learn more, but still barely anything
>was supposed to be finished with the online certificate within 2 years. 5 years later and still not finished
>7 years later and still absolute trash at producing music
>about 10 songs ever completely finished, and they're all dog shit
>don't have an iota of passion for anything else but this
>slowly having to acknowledge I lack both the talent and the strength of mind to be even marginally good at this
>26-year-old NEET with no job experience
>state-of-mind only getting worse
>constant rage and suicidal thoughts

Is an hero my only option at this point?

>>39129023
The originially true answer is yes. It's only going to go downhill from here

>>39123591
>Working on comic.
>Be introvert and don't have a platform to spread exposure.
>Probably wont be able to make money off it.
>Will take years to finish.
>Already have stable income.
This isn't worth the sacrifice and time, only the true best artists and creative people might make some money out of it.

>>39123591
I got certified as an EMT last year, but aren't planning to ever do anything with it because I fucking hate talking to other people.

>>39128600
Guess it works differently for different people. Me, I just needed someone to direct my autism into something productive while I was still young, rather than me spending 10 years before finally managing to set things in order.

What's your situation my dude?

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>went to collage for BFA, after two years realized I didn't want to pay for two more because it would be cheaper to keep my skill up taking cheap figure drawing classes at a local studio complex and making my own still lives
>moved out, got lucky and got a position at a company that would later wind up becoming a tech giant fixing computers
>actually wind up in love with this job and still do it to this day just in a higher position for reasonable shekels (still pretty poor after I pay bills and buy dumb shit off amazon though)
>still do art, over the years taught myself 3D modeling and run a fairly successful IG page
>make probably $500-$1K a year selling art (depends on how much I actually do in a given year) which will never support me but is still fun for me
>everything went ok

I must back everyone who stands up against the art degree meme. I have plenty of friends who went to the same school as me and actually finished and only one out of like five people actually makes six figures doing art. Waste of a super expensive education.

>>39123591
Pro-tip to anyone that still likes video games: DON'T become a game designer.

After having gotten my associates degree a few months ago, not only can I not find work, but I don't even want to open a game engine anymore, not even something like Unity. I wasn't prepared mentally for the absolute tedious, buggy hell I was going to go through, and the process itself drained any passion I had for games or gaming. It's NOT fun. It's not easy by any capacity, and there's no guarantee of keeping a job at a company for a good length of time at the lower tier companies.

It's time-consuming, and frustrating unless you're just a natural at it. I hate the gaming industry now, and I hate myself for having wasted time on the degree

>>39129654
honestly this is true for any hobby, dont make your hobby your job or go to school for said hobby, it drains all the fun out of it and once you're done studying you never wanna touch the hobby again. its not worth it. youll just suicide your own passion.

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I never got it, why don't Artsy people just get a stable, generic office job and animate/draw/etc. in their free time? Are you guys just that stubborn?

>>39129677
I tried not to, but I had just dropped my chance at getting into music as a career and I let my parents stupidly convince me to give it a shot.

Turns out I have no chance at doing game development professionally. I was lazy through the lessons and the stuff I actually put my back into wasn't good. I couldn't model, my 3d animation was mediocre, my art was decent at best, and I was a shitty programmer.

I'm still trying to figure out what I should do with myself anymore. Like, it's really too late for me to figure out something else I'm interested in. Just thinking of working gives me terrible anxiety.

>>39127780
>>end up being pretty fucking good at 3d modelling
You should do r34 shit

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Its a dream one follows,a fire within you struggle to keep lit lest the darkness drowns you. To create separates you forever from society and the sad shuffling consumers. You are a caveman spitting paint on his hand to show the countless ages ,"I was HERE! I LIVED! And this is my story." And the story must be told,even though no one will see it.

But we live in the 21st century,and there are multiple ways to show the world what we do. So Do.

>>39123849
Shit, just get a McJob dude. You could've had at least 3 grand by now from it

>>39123591
Making music is the only reason why I even wake up in the morning. Even if no one listena to my music and I never "make it" I will still do it and live for it.
It's the only reason why I'm happy at the end of my piece of shit shift to finally go home and let go on music, it's a release.

>>39129771
go fuck yourself you airhead faggot. i bet everything went right for you.

>>39129739
>figure out something else I'm interested in
I decided to forgo that notion and just looked online to see what jobs are in demand worldwide and decided to choose engineering. Fuck what you're interested in, choose something that will give you enough money that you don't have to slave away for a mediocre salary for the rest of your life. I sat around doing "what I love" for long enough to realise it was a total fucking meme.

>>39129766
I haven't modelled anything for around 5 years, the last time I opened 3DS Max a year or so ago I hated it, everything about it and closed it after 10 minutes. It's over for me in that regard.

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>>39129739
in almost the exact same spot here, im 20, people say i can draw very well but its just generic manga grills, but its the only thing that makes me feel productive, I absolutely dread the thought of ever working more than 14 hours a week. i just cant handle it, im already depressed even while living comfortably as a neet. id much rather die than be stuck at a job i fucking hate every day just because people expect me to.

but time doesnt stop and ill keep growing older, one day my parents will give up on me and kick me out, drawing is never gonna give me a solid job. nor do I want to , cause I know for a fact i'd hate doing it if it were to be a job. so im stuck, no clue wtf to do, I really couldve been something, i dont even know what happened that makes me hate everything about how this world works so much now. everyday feels like a waste of time just waiting for the end.

pic related, most recent drawing, im proud of it somewhat but im fully aware its generic and not special at all.

>>39129918
your drawing is generic as hell.
But i do see a bit of style in it.
Try somthing unorthodox
And see whos hireing
only thing you have to lose is time right?

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>>39129994
well aware, twas only a 2 hours sketch desu, id say pic related is a better representation of my skills but even this isnt all that great either.

those are easy words though, and I live in bumfuck nowhere, I've looked around and there is nothing here for me. literally the only thing I could possibly do here is apply for tattoo shops like everyone i know keeps suggesting, but I seriously...seriously would despise that. theres nothing here for me.

>>39130087
don't do what you hate

try harder

everything is "easy to say"

just need to go with the flow till you find your stop

>>39123591
I only became autistic

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Nice thread. Heres my story if you want to know it because drawing is the one red thread running through my life

I ve been drawing since i can remember. My dad even kept several sketchbooks which some of date back to 1998 when i was about 4 years old. I always drew dragons and monsters, robots, weapons and all that stuff. Later in elementary teachers took my pencils so icouldnt draw in class. In art class they denied me to draw "my style ". If the topic was: draw a nice Flower i would draw the most grotesque man eating Flower i could imagine. Just to show them the finger. However this would cause the teachers to contact my parents and they would send me to a therapist. You see i was already quie good at that time and my gore was quite good even if not anatomically correct. So they thought i wouldnt get along with my parents divorce and i would be agressive and become criminal and stuff. Turned out im normal because i was just drawing what i thought was cool. I improved over time and lots of poeple always recommended me to become an artist but ive never seen any future in that. I feel no joy when drawing for money or on order. Its a hobby and i did it all my life for passion, not money. So after i finished school i went into a machinist apprenticeship which i really enjoy. I like to work with my hands and mind however drawing got somewhat left behind. Its been months since ive drawn something and since the start of my apprenticeship i managed to finish maybe 1piece a year. It really depens on my mood how often and long im drawing but after work im always too exhausted to start. So this red thread is kind of running low...

Also i havnt really improved in the last few years and my digital skills are really lacking but right now i dont have the time to study that. Maybe, once my apprenticeship is finished ill get back to it. I'd really like to.

Anyway hope i didnt bore any of you who actually read through this but i felt like sharing this. Pic is one of my sketches

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I want to become writer or something like
But i have no idea where to start

>>39130552
dont stop drawing my dude, youll make fantastic shit now and especially later

>>39129023
can i hear some of ur music

>>39123728
Spent 2 years in law school, about to start third, I have a feeling its a /failed career/ in the making

I wish I could draw but I can't no matter how hard I try. It just doesn't work out for me.

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>>39129801
No. I work 3rd shift in a supermarket, and have a 3 hour roundtrip commute to get to it. And I am living with my fioncee and that eats up even more time. But I find time to draw,to add to the canon,to realize the dream,far and remote as it seems. But I try.

>>39127780
Maybe you can use the modeling in engineering so it won't be a total waste.

>>39131111
something something practice makes perfect something something

>>39130961
Thanks lad. Reading this actually means a lot to me because i have very very few friends and even fewer people even see my "art" .i havnt heard or read something like this in years

>>39123803
>tfw starting info science in 2 months
At least I'll have 5 years to figure my shit out

>>39130988
https://www.dropbox.com/sh/n69820m9q4pkq22/AAAqAryW7vbfXzxDU_8AeeTsa?dl=0

This is one of my better ones I made a couple years ago. "Better" of course being a relative term.

>be me as a kid
>like painting
>want to become an artist
>realize how girls are infinitly much better and work way cleaner than me

Sad times.

>>39130988
Here, I made a soundcloud for it. >>39132295


https://soundcloud.com/user-900500900/song1

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>>39123591
I'm 20 now and I've been making music since I was 12. I'm working on an album right now, I think I've got some good songs, better than 90% of indie shit out there, but I know it would be impossible to ever make it big or at least earn a living off that. Especially since I'm not a Chad looking guy

So I've come to realization that I've pretty much wasted my time on this retarded hobby that got me nowhere.
Finishing the album is the only thing that keeps me hanging right now, after It's finished I'll be pretty much done with this joke of a life

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i've always been complimented for my looks throughout life, so i figured it shouldn't be hard to get into the modeling game

it's a meme
don't fucking do it
seriously, just, anything but that.

>>39133400
Try bandcamp or maybe making music for some indie game devs or something.

>>39133440
Do people really listen to music on bandcamp ? I think noone really gives a shit about most of the bands there and it's not like people pay for music anyway. I just want my shit to be discovered by as much people as possible, don't really care about money at this point.
I think I'll just upload the whole thing to youtube and post a link here or on rebbit and see where it gets me

>>39133778
Well i use bandcamp. Found some of my favorite artists there. Its worth a try. Better than giving up

>>39128108

you shouldn't take time off from school, you should already have that shit figured out

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>>39123591
I wanted to become a soldier, but due to my medical history I was rejected. It was all I ever wanted to do, continuing the family legacy as well, and I was rejected.
My grandfather even died shortly after this, knowing the only grandson to follow in his footsteps was a complete fuck up.

>>39133778
Yeah I use it too, it's pretty convenient. You can also check out Gumroad.

>>39123591
Eh I'm making just enough as an artist right now to afford drugs, so I guess in a way I made it as an artist. I think if I was less depressed I could grind a lot harder and make real money but idk.

>>39133420
Why not? Don't you make enough money? Do people harass you? Do you need to do cringeworthy things? Something else?

I went to college for art. I'm a skilled artist, but it's more of a tool to get my name out there and make connections than a money maker. I make money off my clothing business, which involves a little art and a lot of thrift shopping.

>>39133400
At least you've got the ability to make music you think is beautiful. You're further along than a lot of people with the same ambitions as you will ever be.

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>>39123591
I was rejected from art school and now my dreams are crushed because of those fucking jews. I'll get them back someday.

>>39129734
Its pretty draining. The wagecuck meme is real

>>39125120
how do you afford to live and stuff

>>39129734
>get stable, generic office job
>animate in their free time

So basically work all the time? You have no idea how much work and efford goes into quality art/animation

>>39123591
If my college plans fail, I'm going airborne. Everybody else in my family did.

>>39129734
when you get home from work you just want to watch or play something and then sleep
energy is really important for actively making things

>>39123591
I've failed at pretty much everything I've tried. Some of these aren't actual career attempts, but hobbies, so it's a bit off-topic (sorry).
>spend a huge part of childhood and teen years drawing and writing
>realize in my late teens I suck
>try to become a game developer
>real life always gets in the way or I reach my limits too soon
>dream of becoming a youtuber
>videos are decent at best and real life sometimes gets in the way, also too much social anxiety to even start creating an account
>try to become a (non-game) software developer
>actually manage to get a job, but employer gets in a bad financial situation so I must leave, most of my work will probably never see the light of day despite being complete
>try to become a meme master
>most memes never really take off and some only get a few reposts and remixes
>try writing
>get one story accepted in a local event, but no one cares
>become interested in photography
>get a little success in social media, but lately there's been an exodus of followers and likes so I predict it's not going to end well
Unless a miracle happens, there might possibly be a sudoku session sometime next year.

>>39133962
>due to my medical history I was rejected
Its not like you have control over that sort of stuff anon. You shouldn't feel bad about that.

>>39129918
Anon, I'm not trying to be an asshole, but how did that take you two hours?

>>39134240
>>39134304
>>39134443
>all this bitching and laziness instead of doing

I work 80+ hours a week and still have time to play video games, lift, shitpost, and draw. Weak asses.

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>>39134586
Yeah you OBVIOUSLY have time to shitpost

>>39134544
The fact that I don't have control is something that does bother me. It feels like I've been robbed.

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>planning and excited to apply for geothermal apprenticeship program that deals with building heat, air-conditioning, and all that good shit.

You guys got memed into the liberal arts and media BS. I don't feel sorry for any of you if you tried going for art and music.

>>39134650
Everyone has things in their life that they can't change anon, focus on changing the things you can change and you will be happier

>>39134670
Thanks, and I know. the only issue is that I don't even know WHAT I can do.

I got a bach in comp sci then dur to being autistic get denied every job due to no references, and im not that good either, also did two internships where i was not liked.

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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ocDli45faiw

find the time

>>39130897
Writer here. First thing first, start writing. It's hard and the you'll feel like the worst writer to live, but keep writing. Second, don't write fulltime. The royalties you'll get will be shit and more time doesn't necessarily mean more writing; a lot of writers, myself included, write as much in two rushed hours before or after work than during a complete day. Finally, don't stop reading. There's a bit more, but you won't need that that stuff until after the first draft is done. Good luck bro.

>>39134555
constant distractions

Yes actually.

> Liked drawing and painting and craft since I was little.
But you have to understand that art, creativity requires suitable atmosphere and freedom.
> Be born in the South Asian third world where intolerance is a hip thing.
> No creative freedom.
> Made few /pol/ cartoons in college. Encouraged by /Pol/ teacher.
> Artists, cartoonists are put in jail for criticising guvmint policies, having opinions.
> Realise.
> Scared shitless.
> Stopped doing art.

Haven't drawn squat in over 4 years.

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>>39123591
>high school
>wanted to actually chase my music fantasies
>got signed up for guitar practice
>after 3 lessons i started procrastinating and not doing the homework
>this made it impossible to learn as the actual lessons were only once a week and i never played at home
>after a while the guitar instructor just gave up and accepted i was terrible
>2 years of going, didnt learn anything, could barely remember basic chords
>parents started complaining to instructor that he seemed to be wasting their money
>which in turn made him get angry at me and the atmosphere during lessons was terrible

wish i'd just done the practice, at least i'd have had a skill now

>>39123591
I work as a night shift security officer solely so I can do my own shit during my shift. I'm 40,000 words into writing a book I hate but am too invested in to quit. I do creative cooking, graphic design and sculpture in my spare time too, but I know in my gut I'm doomed to just be a midnight desk jockey for the rest of my days and none of my efforts will ever amount to anything.

>>39136917
Starting off with lessons is IMO a terrible way to cultivate interest in guitar. You should start punk style: learn the most basic chords and play some of your favourite, easiest songs. If you're having fun you can't procrastinate.