I'm 24 and my 22 year old sister is getting married and

>Here lies anonymous, he never scored

Write a 10 page tirade about your sister being a roastie

>>39094748
Nah, I don't hate her. I hate me, but given where we are that goes without saying.

>>39094816
say that you were in love with her and seeing her getting married drove you this.

>>39094816
Manipulate your sister into giving you pity sex. That is, if she's really close to you. Then kill yourself.

>>39095202
I agree with this because it's probably true

>>39094641
You should include your reason for suiciding. And I hope it's not just because you're a virgin and your sister is not. That's not a very strong reason to stop living

>>39095249
Just generic beta depression. I doubt I'll ever have the guts to an hero, but the fact that this happened made me want to vent a bit and I felt like some people here could relate.

>>39095249
Being unloved is a strong reason for suicide.

go be a robot at a bar. go hit on a fat girl.

>>39095293
Not really
t. unloved virgin

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>>39094641
>I never stood a chance.
Clear, precise and definite

>>39094641
Your sister is probably a confused harlot. She will divorce within 4 years.

>>39094641
>>39095467
Point is there is still hope

>>39095293
Unloved and unfucked are two very different things

Don't just turn the gun on yourself. If you're going to die, go full ER.

>>39094641
Why do you think you probably never will?
Tinder didn't exist when I was 24; you don't have that excuse!

>>39095616

Tinder is worthless for sub 8/10 guys.

>>39094641
Hire a prostitute before you an hero OP.

>>39095592
There are still correlations

>>39095634
Not enough money. I also don't want to live out my final moments with a perpetually itchy crotch

>>39094641
She's still getting married really young.

The most normie college educated people from my high school and college classes started getting married when they were 26-29

What backwards part of the world do you live in? Alabama? Missouri? Ohio?

>>39095636
Duh. Not denying that. Just saying you can have an orgy every night and still be lonely.

>>39095636
I get how you can quantify how often somebody has been fucked by studying number of partners or something, but how do you quantify love to do a statistical analysis to find this correlation?

>>39094641
just copy-paste elliot's manifesto

>>39095675
Even worse: New York

>>39095722
By how big your wallet is

>>39095793
How poor/uncivilized is your family?

>>39094641
>getting married at 22

Shiggity diggity doo.

>>39094641
but anon your father still needs you to carry his name for his line.

so what would happen if someone puts a shotgun in the mouth at 45 degrees to the hard palate with 00 buck and lives somehow? nursing home?

and is that probably certain death even if done inside a hospital or in a subvision?

>>39095812
i wish i married at 22.

t. 34 kv neet, living at home.

>>39095867
My Grandfather somehow missed and hit his stomach and had to get surgery. I probably should stay away from the alcohol because of the genetics and me being a failure.

>>39095808
Lower middle class, but I live apart from them as a minimum wagey in an apartment.

>>39095846
I'm bald and overweight. If he wants a legacy he should put another kid in someone.

>>39094641
A knock knock joke

If we die let's hope that beyond the grave we can give someone a reason to smile

>>39095916

Everyone I know who married or got engaged before 25 ended up having really angry, bitter divorces within 3 years.

>>39094641
If you're serious about killing yourself and not being a faggot, rape your sister. You don't have anything to lose.

>>39096066
Why would I want them to be happy? I'd be killing myself to end my own bitterness, I'm too selfish to think about theirs.

>>39096169
I got married when I was 24 and my wife was 22. We're in our early thirties now.

>>39095924
what happened could he no longer own guns? did the ambulance workers treat him like shit? is he alive now if not how did he pass?

>>39096197
I don't care about her enough to rape her, I'm just salty that a younger person this close to me is that much farther ahead in life than I am.

>>39096212
>I got married when I was 24 and my wife was 22. We're divorced and in our early thirties now.
ftfy

>>39095803
Oh... poop. I'm wondering if you could also find a correlation with suicide and suicide attempt rates or something vs number of sexual partners? Maybe do a regression model with number of suicide attempts as the response variable and income, number of sexual partners, and I don't know what else as explanatory variables. Number of friends and family size could be other variables. Then compare the R-squareds or whatever of each model.

>>39096455
Count up all the trannies and Japs and 40% of those will commit sudoku. As for real people, I don't know.

>>39096200
Well the Joker and Pennywise have had fun with jokes, if laughter has taught me anything it's that it can often come back to haunt those who are laughing

>>39097552
But unlike comic book characters, I can't come back from being dead and I'm too lazy to fake my death

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>>39094641
Make sure to find Jesus first.

John 5:24
Verily, verily, I say unto you, He that heareth my word, and believeth on him that sent me, hath everlasting life, and shall not come into condemnation; but is passed from death unto life.

John 8:12
Then spake Jesus again unto them, saying, I am the light of the world: he that followeth me shall not walk in darkness, but shall have the light of life.

John 14
1 Let not your heart be troubled: ye believe in God, believe also in me.
2 In my Father's house are many mansions: if it were not so, I would have told you. I go to prepare a place for you.
3 And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come again, and receive you unto myself; that where I am, there ye may be also.
4 And whither I go ye know, and the way ye know.
5 Thomas saith unto him, Lord, we know not whither thou goest; and how can we know the way?
6 Jesus saith unto him, I am the way, the truth, and the life: no man cometh unto the Father, but by me.

>>39094641
Blame it all on some random acquaintance from years ago who barely knew you. Make sure it's someone who sorta deserves it. It will fuck with their head for the rest of their life.