it hurts i want to stop crying. i want to end it i want to stop

it hurts so bad
she wants me to die
she wants me to die
im all alone now
it hurts
i keep shaking
i keep crying. i want to die
why cant i just be normal
it hurts

it hurts
i dont have anymore friends
i dont know how to make friends
i just wanted my big sister around
i cant breathe

hates me
nobody likes me
everyone hates me
im supposed to die
i cant take it anymore
this feeling makes me want to die
it hurts
i cant take it
please kill me

please end it
im all alone again
nobody likes me
i have no family
nobody wants me
i cant make friends
my head hurts
im supposed to die

hurts so bad
i was thrown away
she doesnt love me anymore
i dont have a big sister
she isnt my friend anymore
it hurts
please kill me
i want to die

it hurts
im so lonely
i keep hearing voices in my head
it hurts
so bad
its telling me to die
i want to die

it wants me dead
i cant think straight ever
im barely a person
im going to die alone
without big sister
im unlikeable
im going to die
theyre all laughing at me

nobody out there is like me
because im mentally ill and stupid
i couldnt connect with anyone but her
nobody likes me anyways

im all alone
i feel alone
nobody is here to hug me
im all alone
im going to die soon

nobody loves me
the pain is too much
it hurts so bad

i cant leave
i want to find someone
i want someone like her
i want her
i want a friend
i have no more friends
im so lonely
i cant look at people without absorbing their emotions
im not even a real person
im going to die

i have nobody
anymore
everyones dead
or gone
everyones actually gone again
i bet thats what is supposed to happen to me
i always mess up
and im not supposed to be happy
she keeps talking in my head
hearing voices
stop

she wont get out of my head
it hurts
i want her
i want her to stop hurting me
it hurts
it hurts
she wont love me

im all alone now
im all alone
nobody will ever want me
like she wanted me around
nobody will

id rather die than be lonely
id rather die than have you hurt me
the voices in my head

rather die than give up being her friend
rather die than bother her
i just want to die already
it hurts

i feel so drained
is that all you want is to make me die
is that why youre hurting me
is that why
was i that bad of a little brother

just kill me
make it stop
i cant stop thinking
it hurts

i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you

if you hate me then i hate you
kill me
kill me if you hate me
make me die big sister
make me stop crying

i dont ever want to make another friend again
i dont want anymore friends
i dont want to hurt anymore people
i want to die
why couldnt you just push me to suicide that one time you were angry at me
why couldnt you do that
youre hurting me
why wont you kill me
why cant i die

why cant i die the easy way out
i already tried it
and i failed
i bet aya would be laughing at me right now
it doesnt matter
because im not even a real person
i dont even exist
i dont exist anymore
im not a real person
im dead
nobody likes
im gonna be dead
can you believe it
people will celebrate

fine do it
you want to kill me
then do it
push me to it please
im too much of a pussy to do it myself
please make me die
thats life huh
i never got to have a family
such a shallow thing i wanted
a family
its not even that significant
its just a term
i wanted a family that would look over me and i could look over them
i have none now
i hope youre happy.
i bet its what you wanted
i bet it is

one moment i want to help someone i want to make them feel better the next i feel a draft and my body shivers from the anxiety
because she left
i dont know whats wrong with me
but im so fucked up
im fucked in the head just like he said
im a loser
im never going to have friends or family
and i accept that
i dont have any other wants or needs
just kill me. i bet thats what you wanted. you want me to die
im just another person
im just another person and im nothing in the world
one minute i want to help people be happy and the next i want to hurt people like an edgy sperg
maybe i really am a scumbag
if im that much of a scumbag then keep treating me like i am one kat
why dont you fucking kill me
why dont you do it
i bet you'd smile just like that one time i was crying
i bet you wanted this.
i dont even mind it.
i dont even care
nothing is real anymore

you want me to die that badly kat
i cant be a little brother anymore
im an adult
no childhood
its all gone
im supposed to grow up
you want me to die that badly
why dont you just kill me
i bet you all want me to die
i dont want to die
i want her to be my friend

closing the thread after a long spergout