How do you kill your family dog and have it look like it's

Stab it and trashbin it
Leave the door open so it looks like it ran off.

You kys faggot

Choke it to death, but softly. Like the pillow method you use on the old and the sick at hospitals.

>le just passed away in sleep

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>load up dog in vehicle
>take dog to old logging road that you know your housemates will never venture to
>put 2 rounds in doggos skull
>Say you don't know where dog went because you were busy doing something

>>39034281
can you tell us why your "friend" wants to kill their family dog?

>>39034367
don't do that, it'll show up in the autopsy that it was suffocated

>>39034281
You kill yourself first

just let the bitch roam free drive to a grassy field and let the bitch go

>>39034281
Hang yourself first and then hang the animal when you're dead but that won't happen because you're already dead you animal abusing piece of fucking shit.

>>39034432
who autopsies dogs

>>39034281
Stab yourself repeatedly in the neck with something that will look like teeth marks and the dog will get put down. Flawless victory.

>>39034281
put it in the microwave, anon. It will die and no one will know what killed it.

Kill yourself first faggot, that dog has more worth in this life than you do. Least your dog could get laid kek

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>>39034459
>>39034441
>>39034501
>omg don't kill le precious doggo D:

I was in a similar situation as your friend. The way I did it was by taking a heavy baseball bat and swinging it as hard as I could at my mom's dog. Fortunately, I was able to break it's neck with one good swing. Then, I put the dog on our driveway and backed over it. I put on a show pretending as if I had no malicious intent and killed the dog with the car. I got away just fine

>>39034423
It's fucking annoying. I can't take care of myself let alone this fucking dog that yaps all day and bangs on the door. Pisses everywhere, tears shit up and gets dog hair over fucking everything
Every one else in my friend's family works all day so they don't take care of it either

>>39034677
If it's not a large dog, microwave it. 30 seconds should do the job. It will live for a few more days, but it's internal organs will be cooked. None will know what happened to it.

Repeatedly let it out at night. Eventually it will never return.

>>39034281
>killing your only friend that can't make fun of you

>>39034677
Bring the dog to a vet, they insert death... job done, say you want bury the remains, make up a story, job done, EZ, no suffering and clean

>>39034787
Can't make fun of you because it's a stupid fucking animal that's only thought is looking for it's next meal

>>39034846
Sounds a lot like OP kek

>>39034281
>>39034677
>>39034846
Stop being an irresponsible piece of shit and bring up the problems you have with it with your family
Say why you dislike it so much and work with them to come up with a solution for the problem
Say you don't want to look after it, say you greatly dislike it
If you really have to get rid of it, say it bit you and you are scared of it or something, but don't just kill it

>>39035136
We have enough fucking useless dogs in the world. Killing one will be fine. Chinks did nothing wrong when they ate dogs. If you're not using them for hunting or some other practical use, then they are PARASITES.

That applies to cats as well, even more so because they are still able to be let outside and they fuck up the bird population among other things.

>>39035136
Honestly this.
Stop being an autist OP and deal with your problems like someone who isn't completely fucked in the head.

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>>39035687
>cats and dogs are parasites but birds are okay

>>39034544
Try this if you have a car op
>>39036021
Only good thing to come out of this thread

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>>39036021
das it mane


origanop

>>39035136
This. Listen to reason OP, the dog doesn't have to die.

http://www.nydailynews.com/news/world/australian-dog-hospitalized-licking-coolant-saved-drinking-vodka-article-1.1717547

>>39034462
when an animal dies it is always autopsied

>vet assistant

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>>39038024
No it's not, the owner has to voluntarily pay money for an autopsy. It's also not like the dog has a social security number, if it dies at your home you can just bury it in your backyard.

>Not a vet assistant, but not a retard like you

I poisoned my sister's dog few years ago, acted surprised when it died, and blamed the neighbour.

I also considered driving to another country and just dumping her in the river or something, but it was too much effort.

>>39038093
This.
Chocolate, or grapes. There's a list of things that dogs can't have. You could even ground up a few cherry pits (if it's true they contain significant amounts of cyanide). They'll just assume the dog got into something it shouldn't have.

>>39034281
>le edgy animal killer
just kill yourself honestly, actually go ahead and try suffocating the dog. It'll be funny when it fucks you up.

>>39034281
I'd just let it out if you don't want to see it anymore, the dog catchers or cars will get it.
If you have to be a cruel and horrible person the best way to make it look like it died of natural causes is:

Step one:
mix ammonia and bleach in a bucket

Step two:
Mix it for about 5 minutes
(you should notice a stink once it's properly mixed)

CONT

>>39034677
It really isn't the dog's fault that it was adopted by a family of fucking assholes who don't take the time to properly socialize and care for it. Take the dog to a local shelter and surrender it for adoption so that someone more deserving of a dog's unconditional love and loyalty.
You say you can't take care of yourself, let alone a dog. But taking the time to train and bond with the dog is the first step in learning to take care of yourself. It's worth it, anon.

Let the bitch have some gum. Xylitol is poison to dogs.

>>39038604
Did I stumble upon the normie board. I'm trying to have less responsibility, not get fucking knotted
>>39038573
Will do this, sounds ea

>>39034409
nice drawing anon, I wish TayTay would be my gf

You could just bring it to a fucking shelter and say u cant take care of it properly,
scumbags like you do that shit all the time

>>39035687

You're retarded if you think cats can do any major damage to the bird population.

Why not surrender it at a shelter a few towns over and pretend it ran away? That's the humane option

End your own life. It's worth less than the dog's.

>>39034281
Tell your friend to get a job and move out of his parents home so he no longer has to put up with their dog. It's not the dogs fault it is starved for attention and hasn't been trained, killing it would be truly subhuman.

You know a little thing called chocolate?

Feed it, it'll like it and die, that fucker will slurp down an entire bar and die of poison

>>39039125
Maybe you used milk chocolate and not dark chocolate?

>>39034281
Guys how do you kill your family and make it look like an accident?

>>39039257
I've been asking myseIf that for years, anon.

please dont kill the dog

Drive it really far away in a forest and leave it there. Dont kill it

throw the fucker in a river with high sides so it cant crawl out.

>>39034733
Please don't do this. That's a bad thing to do.

>>39036021
Kekkedykekkek

>>39034281
end your faggot life

muh dogs
fuckin normies

>>39034281
It's time to go back to therapy and have that talk.

just let it outside if you really want to get rid of it you fuck

>wanting to kill a dog like some third world piece of trash
Yeah, the best way to go about it is stop being a nigger

ITT: le no kill le precious le doggo DDDD:
He le dindu nuffin post le doggo pics on le reddit ok bye

>>39034281
Electrocution. Make him bite a something

food poison works like charm

>>39034281
Coat a hotdog wiener with anti-freeze and feed it to the dog.

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poison it and say it was the grumpy neighboor down the street, say you saw that he threw something in the bushes but didn't think about it, then wait and enjoy the fire

>>39034281
Use a hammer so there is minimal blood. I wouldn't recommend choking because you can get bit.

How big is your dog?
If it is big you will have some problems disposing of the body if you live in shit apartment. If you are rural place no problem.

Watch out for the piss tho. They always piss everything when you kill them. I haven't seen one shit, but be careful of that.

Strap some garbage bags on your lower legs so you don't get any blood on your boots and pants.

Not that I would know.