>tfw 2517 BC >just hanging around the local forum every

>>38705168
>2517
>economic boom of the old kingdom began
>wasting your time shitposting on a indus valley bathhouse

really illuminates your obelisks, doesn't it?

Kek, we need more of this.

>>38705168
Literal Egyptian here from the country of Egypt
Egypt is shit, you really dont want to larp as us

>>38705543
fully agree

>>38705628

WE

oriblox

Now champ, just walk into the temple complex, ask for the High Priest of Ra, shake his beard, firmly, like I showed you, and tell him you want the job
If he says no, we'll just go across the street to the temple of Osiris and try again
Okay, champ?

>>38705666
WUZ

nice trips

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>>38705168
>130 AD
>grew up in Rome, dad took a job offer at Hadrian's Wall so we had to move
>be 9 inch dicklet. girls make fun of my massive bulge through my toga all the time
>am smart kid, was top of latin class, but was fat fuck so no friends and no motivation to study
>ended up dropping out halfway through my masonry apprenticeship
>grew up in shit neighborhood south of the wall
>tfw my I-itis hooked up and got angloed by local Tir Eoghain
>dad keeps telling me to just join the legion
>implying scouts isn't the most normie job. chads are just gonna bully me while fornicating qt scottish girls

i just want a druid gf to tell me everything's gonna me alright.

>1405 BC
>Be a young ivory caver in Knossos
>Pretty good with my job but not athletic
>Chad takes all the bitches because he can leap two bulls at the same time
>Fucking Chad.fresco
>Met this nice girl in temple
>Nice white skin, skinny waist, pretty
>We wrestle for fun one day
>Gonna make my move
>She turns out to be a man

Should I just migrate to Mycenae

>>38705763
>I-itis
This was an exceptional post friend

>>38706380
>has the opportunity to move to Mycenae
>considering not taking it
dude, the gods have blessed you to be young in this time

>Pretty good with my job but not athletic
Ok, here's what you do.
1) gtfo off crete, you don't seem to be liking it there
2) find someone to study blacksmithing under. tensions with the Trojans have been at an all time high, and the spear industry is going to grow. besides you can probably find a qt tanner girl working under your master's armorsmith
3) Find a copy of Starting Smith by Markus Rippetae. Everyone considers it a meme because he talks about forging iron instead of bronze, but legend has it that a nearby African King has had his smiths working with iron for a while now.
4) if you've followed these steps you should be an olympian level swordsmith. enjoy the orgies of your labor.

i wish i had as many opportunities as you do right now.

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>still believing in the gods meme, top kek
>May Seth have mercy on my soul.
Anonhotep, please

>>38707952
It might be just a saying like "oh my god" though, doesn't mean he 100% believes in it.

>>38705666
Watch out some faggot will get mad your evading the robot and ban you.

Fuck you you nigger mod.

>>38705168
>tfw exiled from the city for speaking heresy at the forum
>the bearded man in robes sounded so convincing to me, damn heretic got me exiled
>go set up a ragged tent near the river, fish for food
>pray to Sobek to grant me bountiful catch
>Sobek must have heard my heresy at the forum, get no fish
>go beg for food near the road, locals throw stones at me thinking i am a leper for begging
>go back to the tent and crawl up in a ball
Times are tough for exiles

>>38708521
Hire someone to attack someone popular outside of town. Maybe the daughter of someone important like the tavern owner or blacksmith.

Then simply act like you are fighting the attacker to death. The saved person will tell everyone you saved their life and you can come back to the city again.

>>38708602
I heard my friend tried that, the hired aid took his coins and ran off, can't even trust the local hired arms anymore, where is the society going when mercenaries loyalty cannot be bought, oh well at least i get to see todays games at the local colosseum
I hope the render wins, he is so cool when he cuts peoples bellies open, i bet he will reign a whole year as the champion!

>>38705168
>2517 bc
>Forum

yeah know that kind of commerce didnt even exist yet.

>>38708672
You have no reason to assume the biggest and richest city of the Egyptian kingdom didn't have something similar to a forum.

>>38708723
^ This, i think nearly every ancient city had some place where they shared ideas locally, be it the docks, market place, town square, near the temple etc

>>38708723
>>38708749

Yes you do, eastern cultures of the bronze age thought that bartering was a form of lying and immoral.

That is more of a Persian tradition but it is likely similar sentiments could be found in Egypt as well.

Bronze age economics was known as "palace economy"

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Palace_economy

almost like feudalism, now there was probably some level of commerce but not like you saw 2 thousand years later in Rome.

>>38708765
Well at least the temples must've had some form of philosophical and theological dialogue exchanged between the clergy in some gathering place which you could call a early form of forum

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>350,000 BC
>hanging around local rock pile
>tfw not alpha enough to join Chad's group of mammoth hunters
>shaman say me can go gather plants
>berrypicker as fuck
>tell shaman I have ceremonial bone for her to ceremony
>laughing shaman.rockpeg
>berries burst out of loincloth
>mfw

>>38708963
>350,000 BC
>become a man today
>go see shaman, shaman say spirit of stupid on me
>smash shaman with rock
>go find food, many good red circles in tree
>spirit of stupid ruin my climb
>fall and break leg
>bad spirits in leg wound, many pain spirits also
>walk funny, then no walk
>light go away
Not easy being primitive

>>38705168
Might want to learn a bit about history before you post dumb shit like this

>>38705706
KANGZ

fukdanormies