Don't get a flashlight (or onahole for that matter)

>>38690699
I just want something to fuck I don't feel Right if my balls aren't bouncing and I'm not penetrating something

>>38690699

Hell yeah that's the plan. I'm getting one.

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Use a condom. Easy peazy

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>>38690699
>It will kill your impetus to better yourself and actually get a gf.
But that died years ago. You're saying it's fine for me to buy one then?

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>>38690699
>PS: also the stench of hours old semen is the foulest I've ever smelled. Cleaning it is a bitch.
Cleaning is fucking easy, literally just run water in the hole and dry it out. Or use a condom.
In regards to everything else you stated, quit being a fucking 3d chasing normie.

>>38690699
>also the stench of hours old semen
Don't wait to clean it then?

>>38690699
>>38690752
Thanks for selling me this. I'll get one as soon as I'm in the city. Any brands in mind?
All I looked for in a woman those last few months was love. This need won't go away. But there was one...and she's not here anymore

meh. i'll stick to my vibrator and prostate orgasms

>>38690781
>Cleaning is fucking easy, literally just run water in the hole and dry it out.
Is that how your clean yours?
You gotta turn it inside out to clean it properly.
And use soap too.

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>>38690699
pleb

https://blog.onahole.eu/reviews/onaholes/ikappara-girl

>>38690875
Yes, I do turn it inside out and use soap.
I should've been more specific when I said run water inside of it, my fault.

>>38690699
That's the other half of the reason to get one though.

>>38690892
She looks too young. It unironically puts me off

>>38690892
that's just gross dude.

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>>38690916
you dont get the cartpoon on the box you idiot you get an ageless hunk of plastic

you may get into trouble with customs though fucking arseholes

>>38690962
>you get an ageless hunk of plastic
But why do you want one that is the size of a little girl fucko?

>>38690990
it fits in my drawer and my dick fits inside

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>>38690990
A better question would be why the hell wouldn't you?
>>38690962
I think this is why most onahole boxes dont come with the dark, it's just cardboard.
And even if it did, you really only get in trouble with that stuff if you're Canadian

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>>38690752
>>38690781
I'm not gonna use a fucking condom on a plastic toy. It kills sensation, is expensive and also nasty.
>>38690807
>Don't wait to clean it then?
The last thing you fell like doing after coitus is get up, go to the bathroom, start touching around your own cum+lube etc.

I mean of course you *should* but it's very annoying and a buzzkill

>>38691064
>A better question would be why the hell wouldn't you?
Because I'm not a pedofuck like you guys, simple.

>>38691071
If you don't have the will to spend 2 or so minutes fucking running water on a rubber toy after playing with it then you shouldn't be using it in the first place.
Stick with your hand or socks I guess

>>38690699
>It will kill your impetus to better yourself and actually get a gf.
What the hell does that even mean? Back to plebbit.

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>>38691101
>Because I'm not a pedofuck like you guys, simple.
So using a slightly smaller/tighter fleshlight (which maximized pleasure) makes you a pedo now?

>>38691109
>What the hell does that even mean? Back to plebbit.
You heard it here first
>tfw nogf is now "plebbit"
God this board is shit now

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>>38690699
>It will kill your impetus to better yourself and actually get a gf.
Good, women are cancer and don't deserve attention the sooner you free yourself from them and start pursing other things with your time the better

>>38691071
>The last thing you fell like doing after coitus is get up, go to the bathroom, start touching around your own cum+lube etc.
Yet you were saying we shouldn't get one because it kills the drives to find a girl. Do you know what you have to do after getting a gf? You don't have to clean her, she can do that herself usually. But you have to listen to her, cuddle her, act interested in her stupid work/social/whatever bullshit story, tell her lies of how much you love her and a fuckton of other things. Fucktard.

>>38691064
you can ask them to remove the packaging otherwise they send it to you on your own risk.

it isnt worth it though. you pay for the plastic vagina, not the box art

>>38691101
are you being retarded on pupose?

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>>38691107
>If you don't have the will to spend 2 or so minutes fucking running water on a rubber toy after playing with it then you shouldn't be using it in the first place.
You're whiteknighting for fleshlights holy shit

>>38690699
And of course I'm not going to get one. But not for killing MUH IMPETUS to get a girl. But killing it to get a sexbot once they become available.

>>38691150
>tfw nogf is now "plebbit"
It is.
Quit chasing the vaginal jew you delusional failed normie.

>>38690699
>It will kill your impetus to better yourself and actually get a gf
Not necessarily a bad thing, depending on your situation. Once you reach a certain age, fixing your social issues can become practically impossible.

>>38690699
Yes they feel good on the dick but I really like the sounds and smells of a woman, as well as grabbing big handfuls of flesh. Not even top tier, price-of-a-used-car dolls are there yet.

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>>38691135
>>38691197
Pedofags are so pathetic&predictable
Yawn

>>38691150
Why would you actually want a gf? Werent you forced to be around women in school? They are awful. The tfwnogf crowd never belonged here.

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>>38691199
>he thinks normies/beta orbiters/roasties will ever allow sexbots to take place, especially in the West

>>38691198
>You're whiteknighting for fleshlights holy shit
That doesn't make any since retard.

>>38691231
i do like my plastic young and tight

>>38691231
>Argument status: None detected
Always the same with you types.
But this is probably bait so I'll stop replying.

OP is the laziest, stupidest, most pathetic thing to wash up here from rebbit I've ever seen. Everything he says is lies too. Fleshlight just makes masturbation feel good. The rest is all him. They are super easy to by running water through the hole and then a capful of alcohol. It has absolutely no effect on self improvement, that's the most bizarre statement he makes. Korean fan death tier.

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>>38691253
>>38691261
Please tell us more about you wanting to fuck plastic children doesn't make you a pedophile, just to switch to arguing about how fucking actual children is normal in the very next comment

>>38691284
I just hope hes underage. Not that hes ever gonna change or get better but old retards are so much more sad that young ones.

>>38691150
Your weird ass nofap pseudo religious bullshit is what's rebbit. You should kill yourself if you actually believe masturbation affects self improvement.

>that one guy
(You)

>>38691309
>wanting to fuck plastic children
a tube of rubber is now a child?

>>38691234
Yes. Stop being an idiot. Free market and all that. The world isn't Canada where the government forces you to use zir/zer/xis pronouns. All those you mentioned won't have the power nor determination to stop it. And feminists are more likely to try it. But it won't work. Next time use a vocaroo of you laughing to really show me how hilarious my idea is.

>>38691359
B-But why would they put something on the box that has nothing to with the product. Thats misleading!

>>38691071
I and most everyone, except for you apparently, feel like getting up to take a piss and get something to drink after cumming . For us less rebbit inclined it is easy to run 10 seconds of cold water down the inside.

>>38691359
>a tube of rubber is now a child?
Not that there is nothing wrong with fucking children anyway amirite ;P

>>38691410
>For us less rebbit inclined
>Being lazy is now rebbit

>10 seconds of cold water down the inside.
Another fleshlight whiteknight

>>38691376
Governments are ran by men, the same men that are orbiters and leftists.
They will bow down to feminazis, especially once they start going into full drive pushing the narrative that sexbots will make women seem like nothing but toys and increase rape or whatever.
Maybe i'm wrong but i just dont see it happening. VR waifus are more likely.
>>38691420
>inb4 10+ /pol/ moralfags sperg out to this

>>38691420
Its just a fleshlight for smaller dicks you goddamn retard

Dumbest argument ever. Using your hand reduces pleasure over time resulting in a tighter grip. Death grip syndrome happens when you get addicted to that tight hand and a regular vagina ends up being too loose for you to maintain arousal. It literally makes you impotent. Normal mastubators can use their hands, but if you are a single virgin, ditch your hand until you start to get regular sex.

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>>38691420
>Not that there is nothing wrong
how do i put this...

>>38691467
c'mon dude be honest like these guys:
>>38691450
>>38691478

>>38691447
>still being that triggered over being called out
lol

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>>38691478
This still remains the best fucking doujin ever created.

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>>38690892
what daki is that?

I want a fleshlight but I do not want to go to the score. I can order it but it either goes at my parents house or at my university dormitories and I do not want anybody to find it and given it will come in a box the mailman will need the overseer of the dorm to open my mailbox there and if he sees it I'm so fucked in the ass what do I do robots

>>38691580
Buy it off of amazon so that it doesn't show the packaging?

>>38691525
not him but you're the one triggered enough to feel the need to defend an inanimate object/product you like

I got a onahole and it's not 10 seconds to clean and is quite offputting

>>38691447
Don't try to dignify laziness like this. You are something far more disgusting. How am I whitektnighting by saying you should take 10s to clean up after? Months old cum can't smell too bad if you're this fond of it. You must like it or else you wouldn't be so upset by the notion of a quick rinse.

>>38691580
Are you just scared of being ashamed or would it actually be illegal for you to order a normal fleshlight from a reputable online sex shop?

>>38691613
Keep digging that whole m8

>>38691580
Why would you get in trouble for receiving a package at the dorm? I thought that would be combo'these days. When I went I got a package 3 and 4 times a month

>>38691622
I'm just so fucking scared someone catches wind of it. Or if someone stumbles on it. Now I understand why gooks have the whole suicide for honor fantasy. Yeah, I'd be so ashamed

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>>38691614
>Don't try to dignify laziness like this. You are something far more disgusting
>>>/r/ebbit

>How am I whitektnighting by saying you should take 10s to clean up after?
Because like any whiteknight, instead of recognizing valid criticism, you jump at the defense of your sexual object(roastie/fleshlight)

You're literally the equivalent of pic related: justifying having to put up with unpleasantness just to get pleasure in return

>>38691580
send it to a postoffice for you to pick up maybe.
dont know where you from m8 but this is how it works here if you dont want it to be send to your address directly

>>38691684
But that dorm dude wouldnt confiscate it?

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OP here, I am regretting making this thread because somehow it lead to people sperging about the most disparate things.

What a bunch of bakacucks

>>38691727
No, he wouldn't. But he could either talk about it or just stare at me. I wish I could arrange for the delivery to be made at the local post office so I can pick it up there myself. At least theres nobody I know

>>38691697
>valid criticism
WERE TALKING ABOUT POST MASTURBATION CLEAN UP FFS THATS GONNA HAPPEN WITH OR WITHOUT A SEXTOY

good bait btw

>>38691684
If you buy it off of amazon it will come in the amazon shipping box and no one will see a thing.
Quit being so paranoid.

>>38691756
Make a dumbass thread, get dumbass replies.

>>38691697
>thinking fleshlights are high maintenance
Fucking hell, how does a kid as pathetic as you even manage to feed themselves? This is pure concentrated rebbit. You need to go back.

>>38691772
>WERE TALKING ABOUT POST MASTURBATION CLEAN UP FFS THATS GONNA HAPPEN WITH OR WITHOUT A SEXTOY
>cleaning yourself after fapping

>>>/p/lebbit

>>38691782
If I got it right the shipping box is gonna have to be opened to inspect whats inside.

As a scary as it is going to a reallife sexshop seems like the best thing to do

>>38691793
>a kid as pathetic as you even manage to feed themselves?
>not exclusively having your mom cook you tendies

>>>/r/ebbit

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>>38691756
wanting us to get pic related over this >>38690892

well your idea was retarded from the start to be fair

>>38691803
Do you not clean yourself after you fap? Fucking disgusting.
Well, if you live alone that's fine actually. But if you don't, what the hell.
>>38691756
Thats what happens when you make a stupid thread complaining about a literal non-issue that no one but you has problems with.
>>38691819
Depending on the site, as mentioned earlier, you can choose to have the product not come with art on the packaging and it's literally just a fucking cardboard box with the onahole inside.
Again, you overthink this stuff way too much.

>>38691782
If he orders from fleshlight it comes in a regular box which is even less suspicious than amazon. People steal amazon boxes because it's usually valuable. Some no name company like JDPT inc. or whatever warehouse ships isn't worth risking a theft charge on.

>>38691854
>Well, if you live alone that's fine actually. But if you don't, what the hell.
>having roomates

>>>/l/ebbit

>>38691803
You blue it.

>>38691848
He's probably a beta that defends women wherever he can and still thinks he can actually get one.

>>38691819
>As a scary as it is going to a reallife sexshop
how old are you?
>>38691771
wha not do that and let amazon send it to the local post office. what is wrong with this plan?

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>>38691876
>He's probably a beta that defends women
Yea only true alphas(tm) don't want women and are content with jerking pieces of plastic on their dicks for life amirite guys

>>38691819
That sounds illegal unless you are studying abroad in the UAE or DPRK.

>>38691909
more like robots will never be able to get a woman to talk to them let alone have sex with them; so they realize that it would be better to quit chasing he vaginal jew and just use the next best thing.

>>38691908
>how old are you?
24. what does my age have to do with me being mentally ill?

>>38691913
Perfectly legal here but I'm always careful, especially when it comes to this. Logically it would go alright but I'd just be scared as hell.

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>>38691937
>robots
>not beta

>>38691909
Alpha here, fucking is fun. I don't know what kind of masturbation practices you have but if you are jerking of plastic you are doing it wrong.

>>38691943
why again can you not just ship it to your house?
are you parents fucking control nazis that would open it up while you weren't there?
>>38691957
what country do you live in where opening peoples private mail is fucking legal?
this has to be outside the US

>>38691913
>>38691854
I'm not him did I really word my post that weirdly? I just wanted to say according to what he posted earlier some guy in his dorm is gonna inspect the package.

>>38691972
>Alpha here
Fembot here.
You guys ITT are all disgusting.
Putting your penis inside a piece of plastic, really?
No wonder you're permavirgins

>>38691968
Robots = omega-male tier, you uneducated ragamuffin.

>>38691980
I'm not the fleshlight dude I just wanted to help him leave me the fuck alone. I already gave a fleshlight.

>>38691996
You`re a virgin, right, (fem)bot?

>>38691943
At some age you may not give a fuck anymore. i sure a s hell dont

>>38691980
No I meant it's legal to buy a fleshlight. No one will check.

>>38692022
Well whether I buy from you or amazon is no different really. I'd need an address anyway. You are confused

>>38692062
>You`re a virgin, right, (fem)bot?
what does virginity status have to do with being a fembot?

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Stay mad virgins.
No amount of plastic is ever gonna top the supreme angelic feel of a woman loving you.

>>38692149
We'll never get to experience that, we know.
Might as well use the next best thing before eventually offing ourselves.

>>38690699
why does your cum smell bad? Mine smells like cotton candy.

>>38692149
> supreme angelic feel of a woman loving you.
Wait new update on August 2017.

>>38692079
I did buy my fleshlight at a sexshop but it was fucking horrible. I dont even like grocery shopping. So far it has only gotten worse and the only solution seems to be social interaction which I absolutely refuse to do. I hope that other guy finds a way to get his fleshlight

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>>38690699
Since it's pretty rare to have onaholes thread I wanted to ask.
How do you clean one like pic related?
I'm a first time buyer and "normal" onaholes look like they'll just flop around when you masturbate with one so I was planning to buy one similar to pic related since I think I'll like it better. But how the hell do you clean this one?
Do you just fill it with water and awkwardly dry it with a microfiber towel or something?

>>38692116
>I'd need an address anyway.
Are you saying you don't have an address?
We gave you solutions to shipping it to your uni.
I don't see what the problem is anymore.

>>38692116
That >>38691819 was my post not the original dude asking for the fleshlight. I dont know what happened that everyone itt thinks were the same person

>>38692203
dude like you literally just run water in it for 10 secs
dont be a lazy redditor manchild yo

>>38692203
If you can't turn it inside out, I think people say using cornstarch then washing it out will do the job.
I mean realistically the only reason you wash it is to avoid the cum from drying up and cutting you up the next time you use it. Simply flooding the hole with water will do the job.

>>38691996
Don't pout too much bby, I'll eventually work my way over to you. In the meantime content yourself with the vibrator or beta for me to cuck.

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>>38690699
Fuck off roastie enabler kunt

>>38692177
you can always remind yourself that the guy working at the sex shop has seen way worse shit.

>>38692118
You sound like a virgin. And really bitter one.

Onahole owner here,

Before using this onahole (got it last wednesday) I didn't masturbate for 1.5 years. I was in one three year relationship, then a fuck around spree, then a new relationship. I had moral objections to masturbating as i thought it stole my life force. My current relationship has been forced to go long distance, and since having bought this onahole, my thoughts on it are completely changed. It feels absolutely wonderful, better than your hand, but different enough from real girls to rouse yourself into thinking its the best thing.

I recommend it highly.

>>38692211
No problems really. Thanks for all the tips. My only problems are inside me. It's fear

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>>38692332
>I was in one three year relationship
get out normalfag

>>38692171
He doesn't mean when fresh, obviously. He means when you have a months old puddle of cum in the back of it. Redbots don't have the herculean impetus required to clean them.

>>38691622
>>38691727
>>38691819
>>38691943
Those are my posts and I'm not >>38691580.

>>38692116
Call me confused one more fucking time. I dare you.

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help

i have one, i live with my parents so i can't use it that often because it needs to dry off before i hide it again. any tips on drying it quicker?

>>38692382
Turn it inside out and wrap it in a towel?

>>38692177
If you call ahead they will hold it for you at the register. They are used to paranoid people with bizarre requests. You're going to be paying something like 20% markup compared to E-COMMERCE. At least you are less likely to be thought of as degenerate by physically going to XXX BIG SEX STORE WE SELL DILDOS XXX than receiving a plain brown box in the mail.

>>38692382
>it needs to dry off before i hide it again
Why? where do you keep it

>>38692353
I've been dating consistently for the past 8 years. I'm more of a robot than you'll ever be.

You don't understand loneliness till your hurt yourself with others to avoid it you shit.

>>38692376
now i am confused

>>38692449
i hide it in a closet, in its semi-airtight container, i've heard a lot of bacteria/mold can fester in there if you dont let it dry up properly?

>>38692405
gonna try this tbqh thanks anon

>>38691478
Source?

Organelo

>>38692203
Is it open in the back? If so it's just like fleshlight, run cold water through and a little alcohol to dry it. If not you'll need to flip it inside out and then rinse with water, no alcohol needed in this case. If you use condoms then you will need even less cleaning.

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>>38692451
>I've been dating consistently for the past 8 years.
>I'm a robot
Do you even know how hypocritical and stupid that sounds?
>You don't understand loneliness till your hurt yourself with others to avoid it you shit.
Says the normie that got to experience the opposite of it. Love, joy, being with others.
That fucking saying "ohh you dont know what you have till it's gone" is the epitome of normie stupidity.
Once again, fuck off and die normalfag.

>>38692405
>Turn it inside out
No

>>38692489
toilettpaper, form a ball and just push it through until dry. done

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>>38692451
>I've been dating consistently for the past 8 years. I'm more of a robot than you'll ever be.

Same. These kids have it easy, being permanently virgin and alone.
>be me
>26yo
>fucked 60 women or so
>6+ serious relationships
>always in the company of women
>bored.jpg
>feel alienated, alone, lonely
>feelsbadman.png

There's a cute girl sleeping on my bed as we speak, just fucked her not 30 mins ago.
Feel like the only person in the world.

I envy you kids.

>>38692489
>i've heard a lot of bacteria/mold can fester in there if you dont let it dry up properly?
i dont think thats how mold works...
>>38692538
actually this is probably a better idea

>>38692482
So that sentence is what triggered your confusion, right?
>If I got it right the shipping box is gonna have to be opened to inspect whats inside.

I was paraphrasing
>the mailman will need the overseer of the dorm to open my mailbox
from this post >>38691580 which is a different dude

>>38692559
>actually this is probably a better idea
the TP is gonna fragment into thousands of tiny pieces and get stuck everywhere

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>>38692500
The Light of Tsukimi Manor (Hayama_Kotono)

>>38692538
>toilettpaper, form a ball and just push it through until dry. done

it's a pretty tight hole, i feel like the toiletpaper would just rip and leave bits and pieces inside? do you use this method?

>>38691071
idk about your toy but mine I can cum in it a bunch and then clean it out later with hand sanitiser and stuff

>>38692583
>the TP is gonna fragment into thousands of tiny pieces and get stuck everywhere
fuck im such a brainlet.
how about a compromise?
use a towel put stick it into the onahole hole?

>>38692619
>mine I can cum in it a bunch
how do you stand the old cum smell?
Maybe you're so used to it you no longer perceive it.

>>38692608
yep, i do. i never had problems with bits and pieces left in it either

dont use tissues though, they do leave bits and pieces behind

>>38692382
90% alcohol. Squeeze the bottom closed and pour ~5ml in the sleeve. After this varies based on what you want but you mix the water and alcohol together then pour out. After this it dries quickly. Mine is usually left in my bedside table drawer, but it should be good wherever your hiding spot is. Keep in mind alcohol can damage some objects and surfaces, so be mindful here.

>>38691972
I jerk to silicone, not plastic.

>>38692674
It doesn't smell like cum if you clean it, even no matter how many times you cum in it.

>>38692674
the hand sanatiser washes the smell out, I just rinse it so it doesn't smell

>>38692149
Beggars can't be choosers, most people here would sell an arm and a leg along with their soul to have someone genuinely love them. But since no one on r9k will ever have that, an onahole is good enough of a replacement.

>>38692782
>most people here would sell an arm and a leg along with their soul to have someone genuinely love them
I know, I was being ironic. That pic actually got me teary eyed

>>38692451
I'm a 29 years old kv wageslave with crohn's. You had others interested in you. You don't know what loneliness is.

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>>38692149
>woman.
>loving you.
pick one

>>38690699
>your thirst for real women gets only partially quelled. With a flashlight,
Women make me not want women.
The pocket pussy just lets me fuck something.

>>38691580
Just go to the store pussy and look at some cleavage and porn.

>>38691697
>what are gays.
>what are trannys.
>what are hookers.
>what is lube.
>what are sex dolls.
Its women has so much ego.

>>38692009
THANK YOU.
Finally some one realizes robot isnt TFW NO GF.

>>38690699
why would i want to "better" myself? for who? others? what the fuck have they done to deserve me putting time into doing shit i dont wanna do just to make them happy?

Have you considered the fact, you fucking moron, that not everyone on this board is a filthy fat disgusting fucking neckbeard who never leaves his room? some people on here could get a gf but chose not to, because literally what is the point? You've said yourself that a pocket pussy is as good as the real thing, so what's even the point?

>>38691772
Come on now, even reddit has the cumbox story.

>>38690699
t. women

Fuck off your slowly being replaced by traps, sex toys, and robots.

>>38690699
>After using it for a couple of days I fell content now.
this is what we want though?

>>38693774
>slowly being replaced by traps, sex toys, and robots.
It's not like there's a shortage of men, with the millions of middle eastern and subsaharan strong fit young males being imported.

Have fun with your silly toys and gay sex tee-hee

>>38690699
And don't get them because they're a pain to clean and don't feel any better than your hands, if you have good technique.

>>38694040
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=itOKVUbhIVQ

>>38694087
tenga only makes toys for microdicklet chinks, it's rubbish

>>38691261
Learn how to use greentext

my experience with onaholes have been mediocre,
was never really howed by them

>>38694191
Feels 10x better than fapping by hand for me. First time it was mediocre but the second time I managed to get myself a leg shaking orgasm. It's mainly a lube thing imo, the amount and thickness of the lube changes your entire experience. Also maybe your dick was too sensitive or not sensitive enough given a complex or simple hole.

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>>38693512
>why would i want to "better" myself?
to get a gf

>some people on here could get a gf but chose not to
Then you do not belong, normalfag.

>You've said yourself that a pocket pussy is as good as the real thing, so what's even the point?
As if a relationship is just sex? You got memed hard by postmodernity dudebro

Lemme ask u dis, are u autistic or what other mental illness you got?

>>38691237
yes in makes mongodown

I have a onahole, and I actually use my hand more at this point desu.

I mean it's great, but I just hate coming down from a post orgasm bliss and realizing I have to get up, clean that shit ,and dry it off.
With my hand I can just wipe my stomach cum off with a shirt from the laundry, and curl up & sleep

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i live with my mom and little sister, how do i order a fleshlight or onahole without raising any suspicions?

>hey oniichan whats in this box?

this is the only reason why i dont have one, robots pls send help

>>38694377
The orgasm is actually different when using an onahole compared to a hand. It feels like I empty out my balls after using an onahole and sometimes if I manage to cum enough I don't feel horny at all for days. Whenever I fap by hand I'm always horny again in the next 15m.

>>38694409
Depending on where you live you can have the package sent to the post office for pick-up, or you could rent a P.O box and have it sent there, send it to a friend, or just take it yourself since the box is usually labelled figure parts, rubber parts, stationary, etc (you can tell them what to write on it).

Dude, try MULTIPLE onaholes and weed.

I am LITERALLY a pornosexual now.

I'm a 24 khv and cannot be fucked at all to get a gf or even talk to women because of this.

It's just as well, however, because I'm going to be working shitty jobs all my life. I don't have the money or the time for women.

Genetic trash has never had it better, lads.

>>38694492
>and weed.
I want to get my rocks off, but i dont want to dull my mind to do it.

>>38690699
>I stopped being a wage slave, chasing used up roasties and chad's table scraps and being taken for a ride through taxation where my self improvement was being more useful to other people...

You fail to explain to me how ANY of this is a bad thing.

>>38694485
how can i get a package without my mom being able to see where it came from/what's inside

>>38692118
>Shoves giant plastic dildos up her cunt
>Ewww guys who do something similar are disgusting!
Also, a lot. Because either you're really angry and frustrated likely because you are too fat and ugly for chad or because you are just good enough to pump and dump but not good enough to ever nail him down. Please tell people here why exactly anyone would give a fuck what you think?

>>38694610
renting a P.O box or doing in-store (post office) pick up is probably your best bet.

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>>38690892
>calls someone a pleb
>faps like a pleb himself

PLEB
L
E
B

>>38694610
if you live in the US , try this
https://www.usps.com/manage/po-boxes.htm

>>38694610
Would your mom really open the box?
Some onaholes come with cardboard boxes with no artwork on them
Most on amazon do this.

>>38694634
>>38694655
even if i had a po box could she just look at my amazon/bank history?
>>38694686
yes, she opened a box of manga i ordered from barnes and noble

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>>38694686
my little sister is extremely nosy and would check the mailbox before me,
if she found out i order an onahole from jlist im crucified the next day.

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>>38694705
>>38694719
Well fuck.
My only advice would be to either get to the package before any of them can and rush back to your room or get a temporary PO box to use just once for this onahole purchase.
I'm truly sorry you lads have such nosy fucking family members.

>>38694686
not him, but I remember order the monster girl encyclopedia guidebook once and my mom opened that package.

>>38694485
Yeah, the onahole gives a better orgasm, but I still hate the cleanup.
I'd rather just whip it out, stroke, and call it a night.

>>38690699
they're not that good, i find in the long run it feels better to use your hand with no lube

the best orgasms come when you suck your fingers
give it a try

>>38695007
I cant get the stench of cum off mine. Its stinking up my frikin room

>>38691580
Buy kneepads instead and start sucking cock. You're practically a fag already, statistically 75% of boys who go to college have a homosexual experience, and seeing as you're so worried about mommy finding your toys, it's a safe guess you're not the 1 out of 4 straight college kid.

>>38690699
>better yourself and actually get a gf.

oxymoron

>>38691996
/biz/ here.
Sell your fleshlights and sell your girlfriends so you can buy ETH.
We're going to the moon after August 1. This is your last chance. Invest your NEETbux, end up with 6 figures and go fuck a different escort every week for the rest of your life.

>>38691231
This should be updated to add the fact that they are using the lgbt label to try to be accepted

>>38691535
WHICH DOUJIN IS THIS

>It will kill your impetus to better yourself and actually get a gf.
It really says a lot about modern wymyn that it's a concern once men find an alternative source of sexual gratification, they may choose not to pursue relationships with the "fairer sex".

What is the best most realistic feeling onahole/lube combo boys? Or ones that feel even better than vagina.

Give me a list or something!

>>38695098
I just tried this and it is true.
Best cum of my life

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>>38695098
Explain further?

orig orig

>>38695602
suck a few of your fingers as if they were a penor and it will make everything feel nice and tingley

>>38694409
>hello long time no speak hehe
>i am busy like usual playing with my computer stuff
>i order some sensitive electronic components so please do not open because they are sensitive and might break them
>y-you too

>>38694741
So these sites generally don't sell shit under a name that says SEXTOYS. They sell shit under names like ANNIEGE (Queencat) or 2bmoons(nls) so you can easily play it off as a restaurant with friends if they check the bank statement.

>>38695507
Lilith uterus is MY FAVORITE and I'm on my 8th hole. Be sure to pick a hardness that's appropriate for you.

For lube, just use "onatsuyu". Search "best soup Japan" on amazon.

Also, WEED. Combine the Lilith with weed and your face will melt. I swear to god it feels better than real pussy of you warm it up with an onawarmer beforehand.

I'm about to buy another one, as my last one I used very frequently for a year straight.

>>38694525
You need some DPH then. Give you best nuts ever.

>>38695507
You don't want realistic. In case you do it's probably something like pink lady or a similar really loose boring looking one.

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>>38695437
Is this your first day on the Internet, anon?

I bought a soloflesh a couple years ago.
Im married now (inb4 REEEE) but still use it when i want something different.

Best investment ever and its WARM so feels realistic...

>>38695947
>pick a hardness that's appropriate for you.
How do u do that

>>38695947
Like >>38696688 said. How do you guess hardness? I didn't know onaholes came hard?

>>38696307
Then what's better than realistic?

>>38697146
>Then what's better than realistic
Shota dragon dick ejaculating onahole

>>38697213
l i n k my boyy

>>38696279
Anticholinergics like DPH will dull your brain more than weed. Just smoke like 1-3x max a week and you'll be fine.

Also, ~125mg DPH and weed results in disgusting orgasms. They will feel "too good". I haven't touched DPH in doses above 75mg on a while, so I'm about due for a super gap session soon, lads. Gotta abstain for a week and jerk it on the 7th day for maximum results, of course.

>>38690699
If you need to "better yourself" to get someone to like you, it's already over. Nobody needs to "self improve" just to have a baseline level of value as a human being, and when you don't meet that baseline, no amount of self improvement will fix it.