What's circIing through your mind tonight, robot? FeeI

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>>38650941
I think about suicide as usual. What about you, op?

If I'll ever feel comfortable with the body im in

>>38651169
Sudden pangs of dread that cause tremors, rapid heartbeat and difficulty breathing. When this happens I make a thread.

>>38651196
Sound terrible. Are you under medication?

>>38650941
I have literally no friends and the loneliness is really fucking me up tonight and these past few weeks. I don't think it'll get any better...

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>>38650941
I am becoming aware of Osho. Feels good.

I'm really glad I haven't peaked yet and the girls I was jealous of all throughout high school have peaked already

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>>38650941
Regret of not going to college but also thankful but sadness from no gf but Happy for a raise to 15/hr Thinking of moving out, but apartments are like 800/month and that's a lot of money to just occupy a space. I think it would be easier to get a gf if I had a place of my own. I am scared if I move out I'll be even more alone then I am now since I still I have my mom and dad. I also like the aspect of the crushing loneliness like it's sort of self harming or something. I'd go to work go home and never see anyone. Live alone. Maybe listen to music on speakers since I don't do that now since parents. Dunno

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>tfw the few friends I have left hate me
I just push everyone away. I'm incapable of opening up and being honest with people until the relationship is ruined.

>>38651330
>I also like the aspect of the crushing loneliness like it's sort of self harming or something
Wtf I do too

My best friend fo life is in rehab for cocaine. There was this one night where my girlfriend stayed at his place doing blow, and ever since i hated him. But i realized he's a good guy, and my girl is a ho. I really miss him and I hope he doesn't hate me. Bros before hos.

the coworker I have a crush on is a camwhore that sells nudes and I really want to make an account to buy comtent from her without her realizing it's her manager....

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>>38650941
The traditional concepts of heaven and hell are fucking confusing.

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>mcat in 44 days
>haven't started studying
>suicide looking more appealing by the hour

>>38651837
what did u mean by dis?

>>38651829
post her nudes now haha

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>>38652295
The two fundamental truths I have been able to find in life across all human experience are that you will suffer and you will die.
Which aren't necessarily bad things. Both can be great forces for good and change and as a matter of fact I believe that suffering is one of the most important forces in the universe. However, we are steadily reaching a point in which both of those things may no longer be truths. A world in which every moment is pleasure and death no longer exists life would no longer have meaning then just endless pleasure seeking.
Which brings me to the concept of heaven and hell.
If heaven is were "our souls belong" but it is a state of being of pure joy wouldn't it become meaningless? Is the only point of our suffering is so that we can "chill in heaven for eternity." If that is the only point to suffering then why not be a pleasure seeker on earth?
I guess then life and afterlife could be seen as two separate ways of being.
Suffer on Earth to live in pleasure in Heaven.
Live in pleasure on Earth to suffer in Hell.
But why is that? What purpose would God have in creating a system like that?
This might just sound like the ramblings of a madman so I apologize for wasting your time.

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dreading the days of life

>>38652896
why not live in pleasure on earth AND in heaven?

>>38650941
I feel unloved and I'll never have true comfort

>>38651330
800 for a 1 bedrooom?
Find a hobby

>>38652896
God dosent exist anon
Religion is a construct of society that keeps retards from doing things they shouldn't (I.e don't steal, don't rape)
Hevan and hell is even dumber concept, everyone likes to think there is some great happy place we all go to when we die but it's more like a black eternal nap where you don't dream or wake up.
We exist for less than a blink in the eye of eternity, there is no God

>>38650941
I want an asian gf and its never going to happen i think of this everyday

>>38653231
1st But I know God exists.
2nd If God didn't exist life would be pointless.

>>38651829
>the coworker I have a crush on is a camwhore that sells nudes
How did you find out?

>>38651196
Same thing happens to me. Do they happen for a reason?

>>38651296
How do you know that you'll ever peak? Or that it hasn't happened already, and it was just so underwhelming you didn't know it happened?

>A few hours ago
>Break at school
>Sitting down
>3 Nursing students sitting nearby (all girls and cute looking)
>2 of them head upstairs for a few minutes
>Last one is watching something on her phone and is loud enough to hear
>It sounds Japanese like
>Overhear "Kyaa!!!" and "Kimochi"
>Definitely Animu
>Was about to ask her what she was watching
>The 2 come back
>They ask her something about her boyfriend
>Immediately leave

I thought those girls only exist at cosplay events.

She doesn't or won't love me and also wow thats an oldfag pic lol

if you hAVE an outie bellie button i don't is it like a nipple when someone licks around it?

>>38654153
Why do all sluts have to be pretend weebs?

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>>38650941
I feel guilty about my monthly GBP, I spend it on frivolous shit. It's not morally reprehensible but I feel like I'm leeching off of my family even though it's offered very kindly to me.

Being a NEET is tough but I have legitimate reasons to be a bum. I wish it was different though.

Just the usual existential dread and loneliness. Guilt, ennui, blah, blah, and blah. You'd think after two decades of this noise I'd have gotten tired of it, and I have, but not enough to do anything about it apparently. A thread yesterday made me realize that I seriously haven't touched another person in like five years, which is odd since I'm a wageslave with a kind of physical job. Am I starved for affection if I recoil at the thought of it? Like "please, get that away from me, that really has no business being anywhere around me". I wonder if I'm afraid of failure. Less being one, because lord knows that I am, but failing others. Lord knows I have, and continue to do so. If I can't bother to care about disappointing my own mother, can I really muster up any other facsimile of an emotion for some other person?

I guess I'm meant to be alone. Now, at least. I'd hate to think I was born this way - never did like the idea of nature over nurture. Maybe it's because it fights whatever hope I still have that I can figure a way out of this mess I've made for myself.

Whether or not I should give into my cuck fetish with my mommy gf

>>38650941
Just wondering how fucked i am when school comes back on.

>>38654244
You spent your good boy points on a civil defense geiger counter?

Thinking thinking about college that's in a month and how I might regret it. Not even sure if I even like my major at all, just chose Biology to keep my parents off my back. My only interests are music and playing video games. Il probably change it, but I'm not sure what I want to do for the rest of my god forsaken life. I'm just hoping everything works out.

>>38650941
Building props and getting ready for a anime convention. I want to go and fuck cosplay girls.

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>>38650941

Orthogonal compliments. I just don't see the fucking point it's such an arbitrary construction. It doesn't feel natural or meaningful the way ranks, column/row spaces, or dual spaces did.

I guess if your spaces are one dimensional and parameter dependent you could write velocity components in terms of normal and parallel compliments but that's just a brainlet engineering application

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>>38651330

>800/month rent

Thank the good Lord you're not a Calibot, anon

College is a debt sinkhole for the vast majority of people who go, learning a trade is a better economic choice if you don't have an autistic affinity for a useful academic discipline

Mostly mentally dodging painful memories. I've been autistically shouting in pain because recalling these things actually makes me feel pain and discomfort, so I've been developing ways to "forget" what I'm thinking about and clear my mind. It's been relatively successful so far

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>>38655188

How do you forget, anon? I too need to forget. Please help

>>38650941
I'm realizing that I don't have a girlfriend or a job because I've never cared enough to really try. I keep on giving up and use nihilism as an excuse for my failures. I've been trying to overcome it for the last few months but I've dug myself in such a deep hole that it's going to take awhile to climb out.
>inb4 nothing matters bro le xD
On the bright side I have my first interview tomorrow morning at a marketing company.

>>38655276
I get caught up in reminiscing about past failures, so I interject into my head "what was I thinking about?" and recall how it feels to "forget to do something." I know it's vague, but the important part is to interrupt your memory and clear the mind with a feeling of blankness. Basically, insert that feeling you get when you forget where you put something into the forefront of your mind and run circles around your last thought so as to break the chain.

Visualizing putting all of your bad memories into a box and then "forgetting" what's inside also helps. Saying "I don't know" and "what was I thinking about" in response to your internal mental queries is useful as well.

I'm thinking about if I should draw something or just go to bed, since it's a bit late.

I'm 25 and thinking of going to Uni to study ancient history.

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>>38655381
Oh, btw, if you're prone to anger (like me), you'll find yourself randomly angry or upset because your repressed these thoughts, but it usually passes pretty quickly. If you can keep your mouth shut and not scream in rage, you'll be golden.

I'm thinking of going to the cinema... alone.
But i don't want to look like a loser with no friends ;_;

>>38655551
I used to do that all the time. I used to have a job with the movie theater on my way home, so I'd just stop by after work. It's not that bad. Movies on weekdays kick ass since hardly anyone else is there.

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I'm thinking about my ex again. I can't fucking stop it.

>>38650941
I was supposed to make something for a friend but keep skipping it