You are REQUIRED to post ITT if you have never touched a female

I wanna punch a bitch to the floor and then grab her tits and run away

File: 1473835926386.jpg (64KB, 657x527px) Image search: [Google]

64KB, 657x527px

>>38437893
I don't really have anything to say but oh wellll

File: 1494374930331.jpg (143KB, 800x857px) Image search: [Google]

143KB, 800x857px

does consent matter?

>>38437971
Yeah, has to be in a romantic context. Anyone can just walk up to a woman and grab a tit.

>>38437893
Private Virginius reporting for duty, sir.

File: 1489644639746.png (94KB, 1445x695px) Image search: [Google]

94KB, 1445x695px

>>38437893
>posted 5 min ago
>3 replies
I don't believe you.

Also, reporting in.

>>38437893
I fondled a completely clothed breast in high school

>>38437893
Do my own count?

File: PA120116.jpg (564KB, 1500x2000px) Image search: [Google]

564KB, 1500x2000px

In position.

I've groped female(male) tits though

I posted ITT, what now?

File: 1499230191258.jpg (34KB, 657x527px) Image search: [Google]

34KB, 657x527px

Does it count if I have a 9 pound sex toy that's a disembodied pair of tits and I dress it up in lingerie

File: geese howard.png (704KB, 799x1000px) Image search: [Google]

704KB, 799x1000px

>go on camping trip with younger brother's friends for a day and a half
>on the trail aback to our car, see the sole girl on our trip take off her shirt to put it in another way since it was too hot
>see her tits since she had to take it off
Guess it's time to leave this Loserville

>>38437893
I once grabbed this girl's chest back in 8th grade thanks to a dare.
Sadly
>It was non-consensual but she forgave me after a few minutes
>There was literally nothing to grab
I think I mostly grabbed her bra that was way too big for her.

>>38438016
*confident normalfags can just walk up to a woman and grab a tit.

kay-aitch-vee reporting in

>>38438233
Only if you have romantic feelings for it.

>>38438254
>you're at home, beating your meat
>while Chad is out grabbing tits on the street

I once touched a girls boob playing touch rugby during primary school
she and her friends mocked me for it for ages ;-;

File: 1473453149940.jpg (31KB, 491x418px) Image search: [Google]

31KB, 491x418px

>>38437893
I am a pure boy.

>>38437893
No one else? Can it be true? Has r9k truly fallen to the normies?

>>38438234
This image reminds me that Geese is going to be in Tekken! Also reporting in this thread.

>>38437893
i remain pure

t.34 kv

File: IMG_5937.png (50KB, 832x758px) Image search: [Google]

50KB, 832x758px

Once my arm accidentally brushed past a girl's tit and I apologized profusely, does that count?

>>38437893
never touched a tiddy hell yeah

I had a dream the other day where I hugged my sort of oneitis, I still remember the feeling of her chest against mine somewhat clearly, it's strange (she has huge tits)

File: 1754030_orig.jpg (35KB, 333x331px) Image search: [Google]

35KB, 333x331px

>hanging out with 3 friend girls outside
>were all lying down
>they are really touchy and close to each other
>Literally smooch, grope, and cuddle next to me
>r9kBeta.exe
>They keep offering to hug and cuddle with me
>I really don't like hugs, keep declining
>Start offering if I want to touch their breasts
>Just say no
>They continue to say they don't care if i catch a feel or see them changing
>mfw I'm too desperate to have friends to even risk doing anything to them, even with encouraged consent

How bout a tit slightly touching my arms?

>>38438967

I consider myself pretty terrible, as far as general anxiety around people goes, but what the fuck man I would've gotten all up in that. What kind of autistic Chad are you

File: jjjdjdjd.jpg (40KB, 300x470px) Image search: [Google]

40KB, 300x470px

>tfw have never touched a boobie
>tfw have even tried groping once

Man it went badly, I wouldnt try it if I were you

>Went out for a night walk one day
>Feeling lonely as I wander the streets
>notice a girl walking down the street with her friend
>they are both drunk and stumbling
>one of them is quite qt, and has a noticeably large breast pairing
>get fucking horny at this
>decide I will try and grab her on the breasts and make it seem accidental
>start rapidly walking faster
>in my head I have formulated a plan
>I will stand by the road like I am waiting for a bus then signal when a bus drives past by waving my hand, accidentally brushing her breast with my hand
>I get in position and stare at the road
>they get closer
>realise that no vehicles have gone past for the entire time on this street
>start to panic because I want to grab her breasts
>as she walks past
>loudly shout 'BUS'
>throw my hand outward in an aggresive fashion
>accidentally push her in the stomach
>she falls over
>I get scared
>run off shouting 'MISSED THE BUS'
>tfw had to hide in an alleyway

File: serval.jpg (717KB, 900x950px) Image search: [Google]

717KB, 900x950px

>>38438855
Actually came home from camping at around 8pm last night and learned of that. My local Frys also got a huge remodel while I was gone as well.

>>38439498
Posts like this are the reason I keep coming back to this board.

File: 1499988500743.png (521KB, 826x823px) Image search: [Google]

521KB, 826x823px

>>38437893
I've never touched a breast before, but I have accidentally elbowed a girl's ass when I was 14.

She has a kid now.

hey kids
how big are your pepe collections
mine is 49 items and 9.04 mb total

>>38439998
damn i almost got quads
you win some you lose some amirite fellas xDxDxDxD

File: 1500065036960.gif (911KB, 615x600px) Image search: [Google]

911KB, 615x600px

>>38437893
>mfw

kms

>>38437893
It was through the shirt. We were 15.

File: 1492755178884.jpg (151KB, 1024x773px) Image search: [Google]

151KB, 1024x773px

do dream tits count

>>38439998
400ish mb

>>38437893
i was never breastfed and was born through c-section. there aren't many people who touched less woman parts than me.

File: im_leaving_archer.gif (742KB, 500x245px) Image search: [Google]

742KB, 500x245px

Why would you want me to post here exactly ?

>>38437893
A breast?? nigga I have never even touched a FEMALE out side of a handshake.

File: 1477999597328.jpg (114KB, 605x960px) Image search: [Google]

114KB, 605x960px

>>38437893
>You are REQUIRED to post
oh ok. Haven't yet seen a boob irl either.

>>38437893
24 year old mage here.

I touched one in first or second grade. Was walking down the stairs in school and saw two hot upperclassmen girls going up. Didn't think things through and impulsively brushed against one of the girls' tits, pretending that it was an accident. The bitch started yelling at me and said she knows I did it on purpose, I just kept saying I didn't mean to do it and got the fuck out of there. Never saw them again.

I just realized, but I guess this means I was a degenerate back then already.

i likely grabbed my moms titty when i was a baby, fuck you

I've touched women as part of education.

My arm once skimmed across a girls boob in 8th grade, it felt great

File: IMG_2556.jpg (76KB, 800x530px) Image search: [Google]

76KB, 800x530px

>>38437893
>tfw no chaste, chubby gf
Hold me, anons

>>38437893
I don't even know where to start. Women just sound like too much work with no payoff.

>>38441730
Chubby girls are the least chaste Anon. They know they have to work harder so they'll do all the stuff skinny girls think is gross.

>>38437893
i want to die for my country

>>38441788
pay off is you touch the titties you fool

>>38440309
what is this image lmao

>>38437893
Man, I vividly remember the first time I touched a boob. It will be forever seared into my memory until the day I die.

>>38440309
i dont know the name of that anime lady the fuck is her name

Does it count if you were the awkward tagged-along of a group of people that were very comfortable with one another and that when you were sat in a girl's camping chair she rested her enormous breasts on top of my balding head while I sat there silently?

>>38443471
Fuck, I switched subject mid way through that

>>38437893
>every female breast ive touched, i had to pay for it (prostitutes)

File: 1493159128647.jpg (40KB, 477x417px) Image search: [Google]

40KB, 477x417px

virgin reporting

Do i get a prize for posting ITT?

i almost did once

File: IMG-20160520-WA0026.jpg (19KB, 428x344px) Image search: [Google]

19KB, 428x344px

Only passing here to say that I had a gf once.

And breasts are fucking delicious to put in mouth. They taste good, really. And they are very sensitive, the girls love that you lick them.

I felt up a bitchs tits once when I was 16, but she was a negress and the town bicycle. I lost all interest right afterwards when she started talking some guy named "Deshawn" in her hood who "eat tha box like a champ" and didn't even attempt to fuck her.

That's the farthest I've ever gone. They just feel soft, like a more shapely moob.

File: 1499774553975.gif (640KB, 512x680px) Image search: [Google]

640KB, 512x680px

>>38437893
>tfw bump into breast of classmate
>don't realize it
>she says I touched her breast
>I say I don't think I did
>she says how can't I feel that I touched it
>I say "cmon how would I know how breast feels like"
>oh you're right anon, nevermind

Who else is each year getting more and more pathethic

Yes and
What now

File: 1.png (426KB, 1600x900px) Image search: [Google]

426KB, 1600x900px

>tfw too intelligent to touch women

>>38444268
But too fucking retarded to play this abomination of game

does touching my own breasts count

File: kayn_bio_card_1920x1080__281_29.0.jpg (241KB, 1600x900px) Image search: [Google]

241KB, 1600x900px

>>38444293
I-it ain't that bad... c'mon now!

File: 1496005426097.png (128KB, 604x493px) Image search: [Google]

128KB, 604x493px

>>38444331
>tfw ive masturbated in the shower and grabbed my manboob

>>38437893
here i am i guess
i doubt this will ever change

File: 1406683415278s.jpg (3KB, 90x125px) Image search: [Google]

3KB, 90x125px

>>38437893
This thread just proves females cannot be robots

they can touch their own breasts

>>38439793
that's what happens when you don't put a condom on your elbow

I hope you took responsibility instead of running away like a black dad

>>38443565
how in the love of jesus christ our lord and savior was that original

>>38444544
Holy fuck, you're right
This wasn't even original

>>38437893
Once a grill grabbed my arm and pulled me in for a hug and accidentally smushed her boob with my hand during the motion. Also, once, I hugged a grill and accidentally had my fingers on the outer-reaches of her tit but pulled my hand back.

Do either of those count?

>tfw years later I wonder what would've happened if I just grabbed the boob, said "sorry", and when she said "it's okay", said "it's okay to grab your boobs?"
>tfw she invited me over to her house once and I was sure this meant we'd get to do something sexual but it never happened
>tfw she was my misaki and ruined my psyche and I haven't talked to her in years but I can't forget her and think about her every day even though I wish I didn't

>>38438233
GET THE FUCK OUT OF HERE CHAD I'M FUCKING SICK OF TELLING YOU PEOPLE!

>>38438424
>>38438897
>>38438980
>>38440643
>>38441524
>>38444235
Accidental contact doesn't count.

I'm 0/0 on touch:attempted touch ratio. I now have to do calculus to solve my indeterminate form of breast touching.

why'd you post this it saddens me

>>38437893
khv here, hi robots

>>38437893
my elbow touched my coworkers boob
it felt kind of soft

>passes by a girl and she bumps into me
>s-s-sorry

it kinda saddens me I have to post here

File: 1498665650551.jpg (42KB, 535x577px) Image search: [Google]

42KB, 535x577px

>>38437893
Why even live?
But very super originally of course

>>38445641
There's still hope for you. But if you're back here in four years... you'll be here forever.

does being molested as a three year old by a twelve y/o girl that made me touch her?

Can I post in here if I touch female tits on the regular? No? Maybe?
t. narrowly avoided being a wizard and has been in a committed relationship for years
>>38438146
Absolutely

File: Only_acceptable_tattoo.png (529KB, 1015x1527px) Image search: [Google]

529KB, 1015x1527px

19 yo kissless virgin reporting for duty

>>38437893
LIAR
My mommy says breastfeeding does count

I punched a girl in the tit once but I dont think that counts

File: chadthunder.jpg (60KB, 600x645px) Image search: [Google]

60KB, 600x645px

>>38437893
I've touched my classmates breasts on multiple occasions by accident but they never did much besides remind me that I did.


So yea guess I'm Chad now

File: tumblr_nwi1cxlt6v1qg95r7o1_1280.jpg (23KB, 600x331px) Image search: [Google]

23KB, 600x331px

>>38439498
>having to signal for your bus to stop

what kind of cucked europoor country do you live in

File: C__Data_Users_DefApps_AppData_INTERNETEXPLORER_Temp_Saved Images_1500150599209.jpg (13KB, 296x315px) Image search: [Google]

13KB, 296x315px

Did touch. Thoight it would feel special. It didn't. Enjoyed it regardless.

File: image.jpg (112KB, 800x804px) Image search: [Google]

112KB, 800x804px

they probably feel bad anyways, right guys?

File: 1499989218418.jpg (82KB, 900x900px) Image search: [Google]

82KB, 900x900px

Here I am anon. 20 and I have never touched a boob.

does punching a girl in the breasts count

>>38447882
we'll never know
unoriginal

File: 1498829032313.png (186KB, 352x327px) Image search: [Google]

186KB, 352x327px

>tfw I always forget about that stupid whore stripper I was forced to get a lap dance from whose tits and ass I touched

I was utterly wasted, I barely remember it and I know I didn't get hard at all

Holy shit now I'm not only virgin kissless and handholdless but even touchingtitsless

The most I did was hold hands with a girl in third grade. Girls were gross then, so I hated it. Nowadays I fantasize about not being a faggot and forming a friendship with her back then that grows into a loving marriage eventually. This is the pathetic shit you end up thinking about when you're human garbage.

Neither touched nor seen. According to my best friend, a female friend of mine once considered flashing me as a birthday gift back in high school. For whatever reason, she never followed through on that idea. I've not gotten any closer than that since.

>>38438051
>micheal bell's voice clear as day

There aren't enough smug chef memes in the world for this one lads

File: 1496123156910.png (210KB, 500x375px) Image search: [Google]

210KB, 500x375px

>>38437893
is this a replacement for the "please post in this thread uniquely" threads?

File: 1494997456110.jpg (29KB, 640x480px) Image search: [Google]

29KB, 640x480px

>>38437893
>tfw every single girl you see imbues more and more sadness into your heart

>>38437893
I was playing tag or something and accidently grabbed my cousins tiddy
Whole tiddy, not just a little bit

File: 1492182552880.jpg (75KB, 500x334px) Image search: [Google]

75KB, 500x334px

>>38437893
Does it count if i accidentally touched a bitty?

File: APRIL FUCKS!.png (251KB, 600x442px) Image search: [Google]

251KB, 600x442px

>>38437893
Why has every version of April after the 80s TMNT been absolute shit in comparison? I want sexy jumpsuit April back, please. I feel like I've developed a jumpsuit fetish because there's a criminally low amount of porn of her.

what does touching tiddy feel like?

>>38450759
Salty coins and milk.
Originally organic origami origins.

File: IMG_2565.gif (21KB, 312x253px) Image search: [Google]

21KB, 312x253px

I am so alone.
Help.

File: My reaction when I wake up.jpg (22KB, 365x385px) Image search: [Google]

22KB, 365x385px

>>38437893
>Stayed up last night for 21 hours and went to bed at 3 in the afternoon to wake up sometime in the morning

>Woke up at like 8, wasted effort, layed in bed for 3 hours trying to go back to bed, failed, nire wasted effort.

>Found out pc's battery problem is getting worse, basically not charging and slowly dying over the process of days

>Went from 9% to 6% this morning, it's at 5% now

>Tried restarting and everything

>Mfw will have to buy a new battery for my pc

>Mfw I'll wake up in the night tomorrow again

I think this is God telling me to kill myself lads.

File: 1441335984875.png (65KB, 285x276px) Image search: [Google]

65KB, 285x276px

>>38450841
welcome to the club, here's your complimentary soda and 11-year-old

>havent even talked to a single person romantically, let alone got physical.

Get on my level fags

File: (((you))).gif (415KB, 480x238px) Image search: [Google]

415KB, 480x238px

>>38437893
hello here i am, now fuck off

>>38450959
im on your level. how are you holding up? me ive just accepted love as a thing i wont experience and now im enjoying the rest of my life. i mean if i meet a girl thats great but i wont cry myself to sleep if i dont.

>>38451001
Sour grapes
Very original post by me

>>38451026
not what that expression means originally

>>38450959
What does it even even mean to be talking to someone romantically? Do normalfags say
>I wanna be boyfriend and girlfriend

>>38451001
Honestly, i havent given up, but man am I getting desperate.

i was born c-section, so i have also never touched a vaginia either

>>38451067
I have never heard/said

>hey you're cute
>i like you anon
>do you want to go on a date
>I really enjoyed myself tonight
Etc

>>38451092
Oh, I guess I'm a normalfag..a girl said she was disgusted but curious about me once.
Kek cya later losers

>>38437893
>>38437971
>>38438016

I groped my cousin and my niece while they slept.

>>38451136
wow get the h e double hockey stick out of here chad we dont want your kind here

File: 1498911338858.gif (2MB, 370x256px) Image search: [Google]

2MB, 370x256px

>>38437893
Fuuuuuuuuck. I was close to touching an ass once though. Some annoying girl randomly asked me to slap her ass in High School during lunch for some reason. I was in shock and didn't do it 90% because I was scared of her and 10% because I didn't like her so I guess I still have my dignity I think.

>>38437893
I'd fuck animated April O Neil

Does It count if I accidentally gazed at a girls breast while walking down I hall?

>>38437893
I touched my oneitis' breasts during a first aid course we took together.

well shit, if its required i guess here i am
ive grazed some titties with my elbows/arms before but never really fondled one with my hands so i doubt they count
but hey, i still get points for contact right?? right???

>>38437893
i wasn't even breastfed

>>38437893
Welp, if it's a requirement then sure

File: 1411599388461.jpg (843KB, 1920x1080px) Image search: [Google]

843KB, 1920x1080px

The most I've seen is cleavage from girls in loose shirts bending over.

Sigh...