>Finally get a tinder date after years. >She's fat

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>Finally get a tinder date after years.
>She's fat as fuck and pretty ugly but I'm almost 30 and a virgin so whatever
>I go to her place after a few days of talking, She's even uglier IRL and she is a single mother
>She puts the kid to bed and we watch a movie, I'm just sitting there wanting to get home but also convincing myself this is my only chance
>After 5 minutes, she sits on my lap and I can't fucking breathe, she's facing the TV, I'm closing my eyes and trying to imagine I'm somewhere else
>Mind wanders to sex, thinking about qt I saw in porn
>Forget where I am and my dick gets hard, This was where I fucked up
>Ooooh anon, Are you getting hard from me sitting on you?
>I snap into reality and almost start crying from those words, I can't even go home because she picked me up
>She tears her clothes off like a fucking beast, Her fat rolls reeking of eldritch smells
>How about I sit on you this way :^)
>She pushes me down on her couch
>Shoves her shit crusted roast beef and butt hole into my face, I can't even fucking breathe and any breath I take is sucking in her rank ass
>Ok, I'm going to lose my virginity, I can do this, She's just a practice gf
>Close my eyes and imagine I'm elsewhere, licking a nice ass, imagining good smells
>I stick out my tongue and taste the worst thing I've ever tasted in my fucking life, Like some one wiped their ass with a block of cheese then threw it into a sewer
Fuck, I'm going to throw up thinking about it, I can still taste the putridness
>She's watching the movie and moaning a little, It's a Seth Rogan comedy
>Suddenly, I hear Seth Rogan make a joke about something and I know I am in for horror
>Next I hear the most shrill, loud, obnoxious gurgle of laughter erupt from her throat, Her stomach follows and then her bowels
>BRAAAAAAAAAAAPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP PFFFT BRAPPPPPPPPPPP
>The smell,The taste The BRAP and the Laughter are stuck in my mind
>Didn't even lose my virginity, she came on my face then drove me home the next day