"Champ, your mother and I think it's time you went

>>38256168
It is though if you are handsome and have a masters in something relevant and aren't socially awkward and they have a job opening.

>>38256168
>It's as easy as showing up, speaking with the manager, giving him a firm handshake, and telling him you want the job
Anyone who actually thinks this is a moron and probably hasn't looked for a job in many years.

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>>38256201
"Only quitters make excuses, Champ, and I didn't raise a quitter. Now I'm taking you around town to look for a job, like it or not. What've you got to lose? All you need to do is speak with the manager, look him in the eye, and give him a firm handshake."

>>38256201
>masters

This only works in specialized fields, for entry-level jobs that may actually be a negative due to you being "above" it or some shit like that.

>>38256201
i'm ugly and i have hair down to my waist and stuttered through my interview but i still got a job

and it's very fulfilling somehow

yall keep making excuses though

I got a job without a single handshake. What do you think about that?

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>>38256227
"Champ, you could either sit there and make excuses for your problems or you could cowboy up and take the first step. It's as simple as standing up straight, speaking with the manager, looking him in the eye, and giving him a firm handshake."

Should I give the manager an easy smile when I shake his hand?

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>>38256270
"It would be extremely helpful, Champ..."

>>38256263
Bitch, I handed out resumes to every place in the area and applied online to all the places that wouldn't take a hard copy. Don't you fucking start with me, old man!

...in all seriousness, I actually have done that last month. Probably applied to 30-40 places for an entry level job. Had one interview. Didn't get the job. Fuck me.

>>38256168
NEET LIFE

but seriously though, I would never be able to get a job. I've got terrible acne, a slouch, and fucking messy hair no matter what. that and I'm fat as fuck. kill me now.

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>>38256331
"Then we'll try somewhere else, son. It's as easy as walking in there, speaking with the manager, looking him in the eye, and giving him a firm handshake. What've you got to lose?"

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>>38256168
are houses 7k and cars 3k too dad?

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>>38256354
"You can afford anything you want when you get a job, Champ. It's as easy as speaking with the manager, looking him the eye, shaking his hand, and telling him you want the job."

>>38256343
"Champ, it's all in the optics: Handshake, eye contact, resume. Simple as that."

>>38256352
>Then we'll try somewhere else, son
There is nowhere else fuck you.

>>38256293
I SAID NO JOB, NO JOB!

>>38256227
Have you ever actually tried it though?

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>>38256418
Not a NEET, but everytime I've been desperate and tried that I have just been told to apply online.

>>38256418
See
>>38256331
Went everywhere and left a resume with any place that would take it. And yes, I shook the managers hand. One out of 30-40 called back for an interview. I've had jobs in the past, but this is insane.

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>>38256459
"All those internet things are nice, Champ, but nothing beats taking the initiative, showing up, speaking with the manager, and giving him a firm handshake."

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>>38256380
i watch anime. my eyes have transformed into giant asian flat cartoon shapes on my face. I can't make eye contact with both of my eyes.

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>>38256498
"Champ, excuses are for quitters -- and sure as hell didn't raise quitter. Now I'm taking you to look for a job, whether you like it or not. Why the gloomy face? It's all about speaking with the manager, looking him in the eye, and giving him a firm handshake. All there is to it."

>>38256526
you raised a weeaboo fuck you

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>>38256526
I find myself unable to dislike this charming paternal figure

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>>38256261
Questionnaires and online applications, powerful agents to the uninitiated. But you're still going to show up there, speak with the manager and give him a firm handshake, Champ.

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>>38256168
Who needs a job when you have the Jamahiryia?

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>>38256475
"Keep trying, Champ. Persistence pays off."

>>38256168
I already have a full-time job. Also my dad is dead. Who are you, and how did you get into my flat?

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Threads like this are the only reason I come to this autism hole

>>38256256
>hair down to waist
Pretty cute. How are you ugly, anon? What's your job?

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>>38257117
Well then good news for you, there's going to be six of then active at all times during the day and night for the next three months because these kids define memes as those funny internet pictures we post again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again....

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>>38257194
"Champ, you could either sit there and blame your problems on someone else, or you could take the first step towards being independent. You just need to show up, speak with the manager, and give him a firm handshake. Simple as that."

>>38257194
Pic is beautiful and I relate to it on both a personal and physical level anon.

>>38257219
but dad, the summerfag invasion is the reason I want to hang myself.

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>>38257219
Great meme! You're the master of this XD

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>>38257264
WHEN YOU HAVE A JOB, THEN YOU HAVE MY PERMISSION TO DIE.

>>38257305
that is funny xDDD humour is that. we all are laughing this is the pinnacle of humour hehehe XDDDDDDDDDDDDD

>>38256475
I tried to move into care work from retail but was put on waiting lists for even volunteer work. I fixed up my cv, even had connections but after 160 applications and only 1 interview in 6 months I ended up just applying for the same local art shop 8 times until i finally got a chance.

Timing is everything, especially if you live in an area with a lot of student life.

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Cant talk now dad, im still drinking my joey

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When you send off applications to convince your parents you're doing, then you realize...

>>38256168
Your parents are not boomers. Stop with this meme.

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>>38258534
Champ, there's nothing about your attitude that can't be fixed with working for a living. Now get dressed. I'm taking you to look for a job, and I'm not taking no for an answer. Speak with the manager, look him in the eye, give him a firm handshake, and hand him your resume."

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>>38258845
BWAHAHAHAHAHA BEST YET XDXD

>>38256331
You will NOT please bootstrapper unless you provide proof you applied for jobs in every country and state on Earth, including the Christmas islands.

>Live in a small city in the middle of no where
>Don't have money to move to a larger city
>Apply for every job that I'm qualified for
>Entry positions requiring 1 or 2 years of experience
>Check back every day on multiple sites, no new jobs advertised
>Applications make you fill out the same surveys all the time
>Spend too long filling out the "why do you want to work for us" section, application quits out because you took too long
>Become depressed
>Jobs require a positive attitude
>Friend from bigger city lands a position at a huge company through nepotism within first year of graduating

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>>38259177
"You can't get a firm handshake online, Champ..."

>Living in a student city
>Nobody applies in person anymore

Get with the times, old man.

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Btfo dad i need this cup'o joe now!

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>>38259251
"Son, you could spend that time getting a job instead of complaining. Get your clothes ready for tomorrow. I'll drive you myself. When you get in there, speak with the manager, look in the eye, and give him a firm handshake."

>>38259351
Oohhh he looks angry!! This is a rare meme, mind if I save?

>>38256256
>i'm ugly and i have hair down to my waist and stuttered through my interview but i still got a job
This. I also have a scraggly zztop beard and no previous experience and I still got the job.

If my dad started talking like this I would get a gun and put the delusional fuckhead out of his misery.

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>Walked in
>Talked to manager
>Told to apply online, did just that
>Hired in no time
>Done this multiple times

You guys act like it is some sort of magic trick.

>>38256168
Where does this meme originate?

>>38259407
I would flay him alive with my Paul Chen Practical Plus, the best katana in my collection.

>>38259443
Retards think that walking in and meeting the manager is some sort of boomer dream that never ever works.

Maybe if they didn't act like stuttering spergs then they would get the job.

You could have at least used the same skin tone for his hand.

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>>38259478
>>38259478
"Exactly. Kids these days don't know just how good they have it. All it takes is showing up, speaking with the manager, shaking his hand, and telling him you want the job. What've they got to lose?"

>look me tinternet box in the eye and start giving meself a firm liverpool handshake
>me dad comes in
>"Oi Champ, on behalf of mummie May I'm arresting you for not speaking to the tellybox manager and getting a license for watching interracial cuckold porn"

Dad, I already have a job.
In fact, I'm your manager and you're fucking fired for using the internet while working. Now you can go back giving gay handshakes to your army buddies.

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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q5AkBBQWZR4

I command this post to be original.

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>>38259460
>>38259407

"Champ, your attitude ain't something that an honest living can't fix. I'm taking you around town, and I won't take no for an answer. Show up, speak with the manager, give him a firm handshake, and tell him you want the job. It's all about taking the initiative."

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>>38260294
*draws katana*

>I have waited a long time for this, old man!

*takes ko katsumi stance*

>it's time for you to give Satan a firm handshake!

*chuckles to myself*

>DIE!

And with cut after cut I would lop pieces of skin off his body until it lie broken at my feet.

"Remember son...look eye...firm...hand..."

*stabs him through the heart!*

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>>38260398
Oh umm shit that was the wrong image, sorry /r9k/ XD

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>>38260412
*Dies*
*Goes to heaven because I am a god loving man and accepted Jesus as my Lord*
>Welcome to Heaven
>Thanks, St. Pete.
*Looks St. Pete in the eyes and give him a firm handshake*
*Give Jesus a firm handshake*
*Spend eternity in bliss*

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>>38260527
>having to spend eternity with those fuckers
Serves you right for being an asshole, dad.

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>>38260398
>>38260527

"Champ, it's a walk in the park. The trick to it is finding the manager, looking him in the eye, giving him a firm handshake, and telling him you want the job. Four simple steps, Champ! If you don't get the job, I'll drive you to another place. I didn't raise you to be a quitter."

>man shake hand hook manager hand