Dear robots, I had what I think is an official one night stand

>>38122164
>Does this make me automatically non-wife material for everyone?
Yes

>Do I lie about it and pretend it never happened?
Yes

Now GFTO

The idea that you would fuck anyone besides me is absolutely absurd and you ought to be ashamed of yourself for just giving yourself away to a stranger.

>>38122187
but if the second one is a yes, then the first one doesn't apply because no one will know it happened.

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inb4 500 replies to another shit bait femanon thread

>>38122164
>has casual sex
Not wife material

>Do I lie about it and pretend it never happened?
You do the honorable thing and confess to being trash, it's going to be patently obvious eventually

>>38122201
You'll always know. It will become a festering wound in any future relationships you have.

>honey, you would never lie to me right?

Except you are lying. And you'll have to live that with that lie and a guilty conscious.

>>38122226
but if I dont lie about it, the relationship wouldnt happen at all, so seems like it would be better to live with the lie than never have a relationship.

>>38122231
Everyone has one night stands as far as I know.
Just find a guy that's just like you.

>>38122231
You could still have a relationship with some desperate cuck who wouldn't mind if you fucked the whole basketball team if you were honest from the start.
You'll have to lie if you want a man with standards though. Unfortunately though relationships based on lies won't stand the test of time.

>>38122250
pretty sure there is a big double standard regarding that kind of thing for most.

I don't think it's that big a deal. If you were wife material before, you still are, and if you weren't then you'll never be no matter what.

Also you don't have to lie about it but you shouldn't just randomly bring it up.

>>38122276
Yeah, as there should be. A man who can one night stands is obviously very attractive. A woman who has one night stands is just being a bit of a whore.

>Does this make me automatically non-wife material for everyone?

like any woman, you'll have plenty of beta faggots desperate for you no matter what. but any high quality man with options legitimately will be disgusted with you for this if he knows.

>>38122285
>you still are
Obviously if she's having one night stands she never was, this just confirms it. I mean she can be somebody's wife because some dumbfuck will marry her but she will never be "wife material" is any meaningful sense (i.e. a happy, honest life-long monogamous relationship).

If you lie about it to your bf, it will come out somehow eventually, and lying about past partners is x100 worse than just being honest.
If you can live with an axe over your neck for the entire relationship fine, but these kinds of things come out eventually especially if you're drunk/high/guilty/light headed and when a guy has a picture of you built up in his head and you break it, his view of you is going to change forever. If he finds out you lied, he'll assume you've slutted around x10 as much as you even have, and he will never trust you again.
Seriously go for it, you're right you can lie your way through life because people who love you will always trust you. But just know that one day he will find out and you will no longer have a future together.

>>38122339
you honestly think there are no happy marriages out there with a wife who had a one night stand prior to being married?

>>38122164
Do you want an honest answer? For many people, it's a deal-breaker. Many people treat sex as the closest and most intense form of intimacy that they would only reserve for someone that they are truly in love with, physically, mentally, and emotionally. By having a one night stand, you have essentially shown that you are the kind of person that treats sex casually, as a means of scratching an itch, and nothing more, which will make you fundamentally incompatible with the aforementioned people. People have the right to fuck or not fuck who ever they want within the legal boundaries, but certain behaviors do have consequences.

>>38122361
thanks for the detailed answer. Don't you think it's possible for someone to just make a mistake? To be too drunk, not make a good decision, but still holds sex in high regard despite that one slip up?

>>38122391
Explain how it happened, if you want real information on this. Don't lie to us. Be honest. Where did you meet him, when did you know you were going to fuck him, was it fast, was it an all nighter. Details.

>>38122391
Different anon but why is it so hard to just own up to it? Why is everyone always like "oh it was just a silly mistake" like they have no agency? Just say "I was horny, so I got drunk and found some dick".

>>38122358
Firstly you need to understand that there are very few genuinely happy, honest marriages. The happiest ones are those where the woman had few previous partners (as in 0-2 at most). I would say, yeah, the number of happy marriages where the woman previously had casual sex are not even worth considering in any estimation. The most likely scenario is that one or both partners would not be happy, it's just being realistic.

>>38122421
>>38122433
This, I'd appreciate a girls honesty, at least I knew I could trust her. Guys who know about girls can tell anyway, especially chad.

>>38122433
because I do feel it was a mistake. I didn't start out the night planning to do it, and I wouldn't have done it if I was sober. Not saying it wasn't my fault or anything. I completely accept responsibility and made the choice. But I also think it was a bad choice to mistake and wish I hadn't done it.

>>38122391
Having sex with somebody is a whole process, not a simple "mistake". It's not a slip up you would make if you actually held sex in a high regard.

>>38122459
So just tell him this and be honest. At least he won't think you're a dick hungry party girl.

>>38122164
>what I think is an official one night stand last night
>think
How the fuck do you THINK you had one?

>>38122421
I went out with friends to a party. He was a friend of a friend in from out of town and was with our group. We hung out most of the night, talking, got along great. We ended up drinking a ton and I went back to the house where he was staying with him. I didn't know I was going to do it. It was a decision I made on the spot.

>>38122438
Your claims are based on "studies" done by a religious abstinence-pushing group.

>>38122482
Because I don't know for sure that I will never see him again, but I am pretty sure I won't since he lives out of town.

>>38122459
Well, you can't undo it, and frankly I don't think most people care all that much but there's quite a lot of steps involved in getting dicked, so it's a few mistakes.
That being said if you're not currently already engaged to someone, who cares. Unless you plan on marrying an abstinence-obsessed virgin, I don't think it'll ruin your chances of getting married in any way.
That is if this whole thread isn't just bait.

>>38122459
>Not saying it wasn't my fault or anything. I completely accept responsibility and made the choice. But I also think it was a bad choice to mistake and wish I hadn't done it.
More than likely you'll make the same retarded choices again when you're "drunk". Most casual sex happens when people have been drinking, you're pretty liable to do it again if drunkeness was all it took. You're just not being honest with yourself.

>>38122339
>if she's having one night stands she never was
Well, by that logic,most women aren't wife material so OP doesn't have that much of a disadvantage

>>38122516
I like to think I learn from mistakes and since I don't like how I feel right now, I will remember that.

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>>38122421
>helping a roastie

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>>38122438
>2 at most
>nonvirgins having happy marriages

>>38122489
It's based on common sense. Promiscuous people are obviously liable to have failing marriages, and men are not especially happy about marrying sluts.

>>38122506
>That being said if you're not currently already engaged to someone, who cares. Unless you plan on marrying an abstinence-obsessed virgin, I don't think it'll ruin your chances of getting married in any way

This

>>38122529
how many have you fucked total, including this dude

>>38122572
2. In high school I had a bf for two years, and now this guy.

>>38122560
It would just be cool if common sense had some sources besides religiously-motivated studies done by a Mormon "university".

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>>38122529
What you liked to think of yourself and how you actually are are different things. You'd like to think you hold sex in high regard, but all it took was some booze for some dude to schmooze his way into your panties. People like you say "oh jeez I shouldn't have done that" and then do it again. You're probably not special in this regard.

>>38122596
You are not a slut. Stop worrying.

>>38122625
Found the cuck. All nonvirgins are sluts mane.

No hymen no diamond.

>>38122562
But it's flat out wrong. There are plenty of men who have no problem with non-virgins, but with the caveat that they only have slept with somebody in the context of a relationship. Casual sex is a deal breaker for some guys, therefore it lowers your chances.

>>38122459
The problem with the "I was drunk" excuse, is that it won't be the last time you get drunk.

You can say you regret it, and won't do it again, but like you said, you didn't want to have a ONS in the first place, so you obviously don't have the will power you think you do when you're drunk.

why is literally every thread about bragging about sex now

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>>38122625
pic related, he is an alpha pussy slayer compared to you.

>>38122596
Real question. Did this guy see you completely naked? Lights on, nude, details?

>>38122642
>no hymen no diamond
>falling for (((DeBeers))) propaganda
I wouldn't want to marry you anyway senpai

>>38122599
You want a source for the claim that men don't want to marry sluts?

>>38122671
No, I want a source for the claim that pre-marital promiscuity is correlated with failing marriages.

>>38122655
I have said no to sex other times. It isn't like this is the first time I had the opportunity to sleep with a guy. I have had the will power every time in the past. So, I think its reasonable to think I can be weak at one point but be strong again.

>>38122669
Yes, I guess so.

>>38122687
it's an inference
>man doesn't want to marry sluts
>marries slut
>is not happy because this is less than ideal and he is settling
this is not a sociology forum

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You were never wife material in the first place. I mean come on, how can you even compete with this?

>>38122653
This.
I don't have a problem with women who have casual sex with guys who want casual sex, but I just don't think people who disassociate sex from relationships are going to be long term partner material for me specifically.

OP still hasn't mentioned her height, weight, bra size.

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>>38122687
there are many such sources, here is just one

Casual sex is depressing.

why is no one mentioning that this isnt a real one night stand? she didnt pick up a stranger. she got to know this guy over the course of a night, he knew her friend, not a total off the street stranger. this is like a hollywood plot line, she is trained to think it was going to be a romantic dreamlike night.

>>38122625
What makes a girl a slut is not the amount of sexual partners, but the context. If her second partner was a boyfriend, it would be better than some sloppy hookup while intoxicated. It's disgusting but I would still appreciate a girl being honest about it.

>>38122706
>Yes, I guess so.
You don't KNOW if he saw you naked?

>>38122708
So you're just pulling things out of your posterior without sources then, gotcha.

>>38122763
So women anything between 3-9 partners are less likely to divorce than women with 2 partners.

>>38122485
You are a trash person and need to gtfo. Also, post tits since you have no self respect.

>>38122824
>So women anything between 3-9 partners are less likely to divorce than women with 2 partners.
How is that even possible? It's saying sluts are better for marriage.

>>38122821
I am sure he did. But it isn't like I got up and stood in front of him and made sure he looked at every inch of me or anything.

>>38122164
Yes, but I'd probably hate you anyway.

Don't lie, like seriously don't. If I found out a girl lied to me about something so important to me the absolute best case scenario is me never talking to her again.

>>38122824
The much more obvious trend from that graph is that marrying someone with just one sexual partner or, especially, a virgin significantly improves your chances of a successful marriage compared to 2+ You shouldn't even bother going past 1.

>>38122854
>>38122854
did you walk across the room naked?

Hey OP how do you feel about your actions?

>>38122869
But the chances of finding a virgin or just one sexual partner is rare. Like it or not we all need to settle or die alone.

>>38122871
Yes. Why does that matter though?

>>38122881
I don't feel very good about them honestly.

>>38122869
the chance of divorce only increases by 5% when comparing one sexual partner to three. obsessing over that small difference is autism.

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>>38122849
Well, that's what the chart says.

>>38122869
Yeah, best would be no or one partner, but after that a more promiscuous woman would be better than one with just two partners.

>>38122886
Not necessarily, a third of women are like that apparently.

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>>38122919
>virgin brides decrease while nonvirgins increase
>mfw whores are more common

>>38122890
>>38122890
always see in movies the girl walking across the room naked after fucking, cute little naked butt on full display. just wondering if you did that.

>>38122953
No kidding. The attitude towards premarital sex has changed a lot in the last forty years - and of course these days women would probably report more honestly if they had premarital partners.

>>38122960
It wasn't a very big room, so there wasn't a whole lot of walking going on.

>>38122972
Also note how less people are getting married as promiscuity increases.

>>38122653
>Casual sex is a deal breaker for some guys
>some guys

Exactly, and those guys are abstinence-obsessed virgins. Most of the people have accepted that most of girls they meet have had casual sex at some point so they don't really care anymore.

>>38122916
Using the 2000s data, you are 5 times more likely to get a divorce when going from 0 partners to 3 partners. That's not a small difference at all. Given that divorce usually involves the man getting divorce raped in the process (loses half of his assets, monthly alimony and child support payments), it is downright stupid to take such high risks.

OP- you have gotten alot of good advice here. Please post bra size and height/weight to say thanks.

>>38123024
Well, with more women joining the workforce and a man's income rarely able to support a family alone, cross-gender distrust going high, people less interested in having children etc, yeah. Obviously. Promiscuity is just part of the whole shitshow.

>>38123025
>Exactly, and those guys are abstinence-obsessed virgins
No they're not, it's just a traditionalist mindset. It exists more than you seem willing to believe, maybe because you live in an area where people on the whole are more promiscuous but your experience is not the sum whole of the world.

>>38123036
It goes from 20% to 25% for the year 2000

>>38123065
34b, 5'3", 120 or so I guess

>>38123099
I was referring to 0 partners as the starting point, not 1 partner, but even if i was referring to 1 partner as the starting point, the increase in risk is 1.25 times, not as much, but still not trivial.

>>38123128
I was comparing the chance of divorce for 1 partner compared to 3.

>>38123036
>given that a divorce usually involves the man getting divorce raped in the process
Not true actually, but very common misconception.
https://www.iser.essex.ac.uk/research/publications/working-papers/iser/2008-07

OP you cheated on your BF? What a skank. You should feel ashamed of yourself.

Nah you're fine. I mean shit, why can't you just be happy about it?

These anons are now laughing at the fact you can't get some chad, but would you really want to date a guy who sees you as a slut if you had a one night stand? I sure wouldn't. Some guy says
>all women who have had a one night stand isn't worth dating or marrying
now, if I heard that, regardless of if I had a one night stand or not, I would break up with him.

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>>38123125
>120
I think I found a picture of OP, beautifully thick may I add.

>>38123025
Wrong. Caual sex ruined me. Its pretty depressing and makes you feel worthless.

>>38123240
>now, if I heard that, regardless of if I had a one night stand or not, I would break up with him.
Why, it's a pretty mundane and understandable opinion. Why does it offend your sensibilities so?

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Honestly I don't think I'd do it myself, but logically, there's no reason not to. It's impossible to connect with people once you're both over 25, had your one big relationship go up in flames, and don't have 10/10 looks at your disposal. I went with option B and nuked my sex drive with antidepressants, so I won't be validating anybody's fragile masculinity only to feel worse afterward, anytime soon.

>>38123312
bls be my qt asexual emotionally bitter gf

>>38123312
>nuked my sex drive with antidepressants
Serious question, why? Antidepressants killed my sex drive but not my need for emotional intimacy so it didn't help me that way at all. I'd rather be off antidepressants and BC and at least enjoy myself sexually (on my own, I mean).

>>38123390
Not that Anon, but I'm another Anon with a sex drive nuked by anti-depressants. In my case it just reduces my urges to masturbate. I don't really miss having those urges or anything and I am somewhat more productive with my time.

>>38123420
I mean, I was just on a light dose of antidepressants but I took lots of SSRIs for migraines and not having a libido actually depressed me more. Masturbation's one of the few hobbies I have that I genuinely enjoy.

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>>38123240
You really think a guy not wanting to be with a girl who has one night stands has some sort of moral failing? That's silly

>>38123440
I'm on wellbutrin, it's not an SSRI, I wasn't going to take that shit if they weren't gonna give me this. I did this on purpose because I was just associating those feelings with heartbreak.

>>38123390
>emotional intimacy

Once you give up on that, it's smooth sailing. I guess. Or at least you won't be obsessed with the idea that not having human connections is going to stop you from becoming an independent, functional adult. Maybe not the most mentally healthy, but you won't feel the crushing weight of feeling worthless.

>>38123576
Yeah, it's just difficult because I'm a little bitch who still cuddles her plushies for emotional support. But you're right, completely disassociating self-worth from connecting with others would probably do me good.

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>>38122164
To be realistic, saying you have had one night stands is like having a tattoo. Men will perceive you as an easy lay but they'll be overall less attracted to you and probably won't want to marry you. Yes it does lower your worth in the eyes of men, that's just a consequence of your decision that you'll have to live with. You can lie about it but then you're being dishonest with your partner and it's just going to spiral into a bad relationship.

>>38123601
It's different if you're incel or just haven't been in any serious relationships, you won't be as jaded or guarded about your own ability to judge people.

>>38122164
As a guy who's done the same, I wouldn't hold you to a higher standard than myself, therefore I think it's ok

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>>38123709
Interesting anecdote.

>>38123760
What's your implication here? I'm only speaking for myself, I'm not saying everyone is obligated to be ok with it

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>>38122164
>Does this make me automatically non-wife material for everyone?

yes because men are not stupid enough to spend thousands of dollars on you by marrying you while you gave it for free to a chad.

>>38122201
chad likes to brag about it and everyone knows he use you like a cum tissue. trust me I am friends with chads and thanks to them I know which girls in town to avoid because they are sluts.

>>38123082
>a traditionalist mindset
Well, most of traditionalists are pretty abstinence-obsessed and also they are a minority in the modern age.

Also, if OP wants to marry a traditionalist, then she's done fucked up. But if that's not a case (and I reckon it isn't) she's fine.

>>38123263

I never said casual sex is necessarily good, I just said it's a totally normal and very common thing nowadays

>>38123247
Im not super skinny, but Im not fat. 120 is average. I am normally built.

>>38123233
I dont have a bf.

>>38123947
What makes it normal if it makes non-mentally ill people feel terrible about themselves?

>>38123956
>>38123956
was the guy you fucked a chad?

>>38123709
Men and women are not equal because of societal dynamics. The standards shouldn't be treated as such.

>>38122231
>it would be better to live with the lie than never have a relationship
>this is how roasties actually think

I'm not even surprised at this point.

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>>38123997
It has absolutely nothing to do with mental health. It makes some people feel terrible and it makes some people feel good.

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>>38122164
Low tier bait. Saged

>>38122625
>has casual sex
>not a slut
???

>>38123947
Traditionalists are not "abstinence-obsessed", they just view sex and romantic relationships as necessarily intertwined. There is not insignificant number of people who are like this. In fact calling them traidtionalists is a big strong of a word, it's a pretty everyday view to have even in the modern age.

>>38124366
*In fact calling them traditionalists is a bit of a strong word

>>38124366
>There is not insignificant number of people who are like this
>it's a pretty everyday view to have even in the modern age

That's where we disagree. It might be a common view on /r9k/, but it isn't irl. There are people irl with that view but they are in a minority. And in the newer generations the number of people with that view is going to gradually decrease until casual sex becomes completely socially acceptable and normal thing just like it happened with premarital sex. But already now the majority of people have no problem with it.

>>38124893
>That's where we disagree. It might be a common view on /r9k/, but it isn't irl.
This might be more of a problem of thinking the circles you move in are more representative than they are. "Minority" is a broad term, even if it's as little as 10% that is still a significant number of men who have a problem with it.
You can see how it manifests in that women lie/underplay their sexual history - because many men do have a problem with it. It's simply misleading to tell OP only some autistic weirdos will have a problem with it, because it's just not true.

>>38122164
Does this make me automatically non-wife material for everyone?
Absolutely.
>Do I lie about it and pretend it never happened?
No you are a whore, why pretend you are something else?

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>>38122164
>Does this make me automatically non-wife material for everyone?
I've accepted that if I want to get married and have kids, I'm probably going to have to accept something like that.
I'm not happy about it, but this generations was robbed of the chance at that kind of happiness by the Jew.

All I can hope is that we will be able to solve the societal problems the Jew has inflicted on us, so that future generations can have the happiness we were robbed of.

>>38124994
>even if it's as little as 10% that is still a significant number of men who have a problem with it
>a significant number

No, it's not. That still means that 9/10 men OP meets aren't going to care. I don't think it ruins her chances that much.

>You can see how it manifests in that women lie/underplay their sexual history

I think this is more because they're afraid they're going to be judged by other women than by men. Or maybe because they are just generally ashamed of it and not because they think men won't like them because of it.

>It's simply misleading to tell OP only some autistic weirdos will have a problem with it, because it's just not true.

I'm just saying that both she and most of the people in this thread are making it look like a lot bigger deal than it actually is.

Does that mean that certain guys won't be attracted to her anymore?
Yes
Does it mean she'll never ever find love and/or get married?
Of course not

>>38122459
means he didnt fuck you good enough then

VILE DISGUSTING CUNT WHORE

>>38125315
>No, it's not.
I don't think you really appreciate how large a section 10% of men is, and that's a reasonably conservative estimate.

>I think this is more because they're afraid they're going to be judged by other women than by men.
They lie to their potential partners about it. The simplest explanation: they don't want a potential partner to be put off because they know it's unattractive.

>I'm just saying that both she and most of the people in this thread are making it look like a lot bigger deal than it actually is.
Aren't you the guy who said that only abstinence obsessed virgins would care? That isn't true.

It's not the end of the world but it does negatively affect her chances especially if she wants to be with a more traditional minded guy, which is what "wife material" is presumably about. She'd have to live with the idea that he was settling at the very least.

>>38122164
I'm sad that you didn't get murdered and thrown in an alley dumpster.

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>tfw lost my virginity to a one night stand

I feel so guilty. I haven't had sex since but I feel like a whore.

I was curious and I was failing at acquiring a bf so I did it but now I regret it.

>>38122485
Canada day?

>>38125569
>failing at acquiring a bf
Fucking how? You can even just go on this very site, post up an email and a bunch of thirsty cunts will try to be your boyfriend.

>>38125598
I don't know. I managed to get one but then he broke up with me really quick. Since then I didn't try.

Most of the men here at least want to only fuck you and then leave.

>tfw deep down more interested in used goods because blood is nasty

I don't want a crazy promiscuoud lady but the thought of a wedding night having blood on the sheets scares me although with the existence of dildos and vibrators I dunno just how virgin a virgin is anymore

Maybe deep down we just want virgins to the flesh

>>38125694
>Most of the men here at least want to only fuck you and then leave.

That's a best case scenario, the ones that actually want relationships would probably be very abusive or or insanely clingy. Nobody with half a brain comes to 4chan to look for friends or partners, just look at the shitshow /soc/ became.

>>38125694
>Most of the men here at least want to only fuck you and then leave.

Yea, that's called the fuck-zone. That's the female equivalent of "girl stringing me along then friend-zoning you". It's trivial to use your pussy to get some cock, but if you want a man to emotionally invest in you, you need to prove that you are more than just a pussy on a stick.

>>38125569
>One night stands are a thing that happen

There's a whole side to reality I know nothing about

Meanwhile my mind flips back to Jojo's bizarre adventure at the thought of a "stand"

>>38125760
>but if you want a man to emotionally invest in you, you need to prove that you are more than just a pussy on a stick.

I-I'll try

>>38125798
To be fair I used to feel like sex was all part of a big conspiracy, couldn't imagine ever getting to that stage with another person.

But yeah it did happened.

>>38125519
>I don't think you really appreciate how large a section 10% of men is, and that's a reasonably conservative estimate.

Absolutely speaking, a section of 10% of men is a group of about 350 million people which is a fucking huge group. But relatively speaking, it means that only 1/10 guys she meets is going to care. And even if it's 20% (which is totally over exaggerated) it still means that 4/5 guys are still not going to give a shit if she's had casual sex or not.

Besides, chances are that at least half of those 10% wouldn't be attracted to her no matter how much partners she had because they would be put off by some physical/psychical feature they don't find attractive.

Again, I'm not saying people who care if a girl's had casual sex don't exist, I'm just saying that there isn't enough of them to ruin her chances of getting married that much.

>it does negatively affect her chances especially if she wants to be with a more traditional minded guy

Well, I already said, if she wants to marry a traditionally-minded guy, she's done fucked up but it doesn't mean she can't marry anyone who isn't a cuck.

>>38125760
>you need to prove that you are more than just a pussy on a stick.
How does a girl do that? All men see me as a hole to fuck and nothing more, regardless of what I do.

>>38126207
>pussy on a stick

That sounds...painful

Also whenever someone says pussy I occasionally think of cats

File: 1488357742150.jpg (33KB, 500x375px) Image search: [Google]

33KB, 500x375px

>>38126595
>cats
Mrrrowww!

>>38126207
That's the million dollar question. How does a man break through the friendzone? All women see men as an emotional tampon and nothing more.

>>38126663
Show them what you're like as a boyfriend. Varies from girl to girl but generally don't be needy, clingy, and beta.

>>38125694
>I was failing at acquiring
>didn't even try
are you dumb