>be at family reunion >hey anon, do you have a girlfriend

>>38118800
I'd just say "no."

>>38118821
doing this will embarass your parents for raising such a loser child

>>38118839
Then say that you're a homosexual. People like gays nowadays or something.

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>>38118800
LONGCAT IS LOOOONG

desuyo

>>38118893
I don't even think longcat is that long.

>>38118800
I'd just say "no, not yet" or say that you're not looking for one at the moment

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>>38118938
what the fuck did you say you motherfucker

>at christmas with family
>my mums side to be specific
>her family is was her mum (at the time) and eight (8) sisters
>one's a real bitch
>keeps prodding into my miserable fucking existence
>hows jobs going
>what are you doing with your life
>whats your plan?
>eventually gets to "do you have a girlfriend? why isnt she here?"
>was 5 years ago, I'd like to mention, as I'm not so much of an edgy faggot anymore
>simply reply, "have you gone through menopause yet?"
>dead silence
>no one asks me a word again
>never ever attend another family christmas and spend them alone drinking

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>>38118800
"no"
>funeral afterparty with a bunch of relatives
>random guy sitting nearby asks if I have a girlfriend yet
>"no"
>parents weigh in saying the same thing in more words
>mom goes "haha he likes Japanese girls, right?"
>basing it on the rare cases she sees anime on my screen
>anime characters don't even look Japanese
I hate family gatherings

>>38119051
That's overkill man, you should have just brushed it off or casually respond with a "I don't give a fuck" attitude.

>>38118800
"Not as as of now"

>>38119051
will use this if needed. thanks

>"No, you wanna help me out?"
>"W-what? What do you mean?"
>"I want to press my lips against yours and touch you. That okay?"

Easy peasy. Mom/aunt/sis/cousin gf acquired.

Why doesn't "no" suffice?

>so anon how is the job search going?

>>38118839
Thats not my problem senpai

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>>38118880
I can attest to this. When I was in school I got called a school shooter every day for four years, then in sophomore year someone found out I was gay and then told everyone. After that day no one called me school shooter anymore, and I started getting away with so much shit. I made a teacher cry, I slapped the shit out of a retard, I said the words "Nigger" and "Faggot" in conversation frequently with at least six teachers (one was the principle), and nothing happened. Shit was cash.

One of the best parts is that you don't even have to actually be gay, just say you are and no one will question it. Some lanky, effeminate, faggot who I also went to school with faked it for four years and then the day he graduated started going out with this 10/10 fag hag at school. He got a college scholarship by writing about "how hard it is to be gay in the bible belt". It's fucking insanity.

>>38118800
No, I hate wymyn.

>>38118839
It's their fault though I didn't ask to be born with shit genes did I?