>go into supermarket >get cart full of items >get cashier

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>>37925205
>Next door keeps having loud music
>keep ordering pizzas, taxis and hookers to his house

thatll teach you to disturb my NEET-naps

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>live

DEVILISH

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>>37925205
>cashier tells me to have a nice day
>slaughter their family for telling me what to do

This 7/10 roastie cashier was trying really hard to talk me and she kept smiling at me while I said next to nothing. It was surreal.

>get one of those fruit/veggie bags
>take it into the bathroom and take a shit in it
>put it in my cart with the rest of my stuff and take it to the cashier
>when they ask why there is poop in the bag I act astonished and bewildered, I have no idea, and I blame it on them
>make them throw it out for me
>but not before fishing out my veggies from the bag first cause I still want to buy those

> post in /devilish/ thread
> did nothing wrong all day

S A T A N I C

>fart in Iceland
>Autistic Icelanders come running up to me to try to sniff my asshole

>>37925508
kek
orginili

>>37926378
>this post
absolutely D E V I L I S H

>friend doesn't want to get drunk
>pick up this "Dark beer that's actually a lite beer"
>get him to drink 32oz before telling him it's actually 9% abv
>tell him he's too fucked up to drive
>in for a penny I guess
>proceed to get plastered with my gay friend and touch his butt when I put him to bed
>after doing his dishes
>what a mate

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i threw a can of pepsi into a paper only bin

>>37925205
>be attractive sperg
>always avoid eye contact with women
>they try to get me to notice them with subtle signals that may not even be signals at all
>can hear them scoff as I walk away
>sometimes I see them again and they give me sad looks

Who /heartbreaker/?

I went to my local supermarket and tried to get fresh chicken tenders from the deli. The old bitch at the counter was scowling at me, and after she got my stuff I went over to the deli register and waited. She saw me but didn't check me out. I ate my food and on the way to the self scan i dropped a 3/4 honey mustard container while walking back through the deli, and it went everywhere. After that i ran away and checked out. I hope that bitc had to clean it.

>>37925205
too /devilish/ that it's too good to be true

Make sure it's like a metric fuck-ton of frozen food from different places so they have to take it back immediately