Why is that even though I get complimented by people, I always

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>>37901639
You may be suffering from disassociation or just low self-esteem. How close are you with this person?

>>37901639
That is what is called virtue signalling.

She thinks she's done her good deed for the day and will believe she is a good person for lying to your face in an attempt to make you feel better.

>>37901639
How old are you? You may have avoidant personality type/disorder.

>>37901701
I'm not too close with them. We occasionally talk every once in a while. I do want to get closer with her, but I don't see it happening due to issues with anxiety and self esteem.

>>37901731
Proper virtue signalling would require an audience. I think there's another reason for girls to lie to their fat friends, probably something to do with group cohesion.

>>37901639
In this example its you getting turned down, obviously its gonna feel like shit.

>>37901731
Yeah, I think she is sort of doing it just so I can feel better. It doesn't really help since again I do have my issue of not really believing compliments.

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>>37901784
Did you actually help this person? Empathy can mean a lot to some people, OP, even if you don't see it's effects. Helping another with their problems can cause them to get closer.
At least you know what you're up against. Why not take this time to take stock in these words? Even if you don't fully believe them, there may be some truth in the compliments, so start thinking about how you can do more.

>>37901760
I'm 18 years old.
Oregigolo

>>37901639
Take it as reading statistics where the participants answer questions. Yeah there might be some bullshitting but you're likely to see a trend.

That said, I've been called handsome by /r9k/, /soc/, my family and random old ladies but I don't believe I am. I think I'm very ugly and people just act nice to me because I probably come off as retarded or sad and in need of compliments. I think we're our own worst critics, OP, even if it makes sense to accept at least SOME of what people say.

>>37901856
Yeah, I helped her out a little bit over the last month with some shit. She's been depressed with some stuff with her boyfriend so I've been like helping her with that and I've been helping her with some work. The thing is I really don't think I even did a good job on those things, yet she called me "amazing" and a "great person".

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>>37901883
This anon gives some good advice. I'd listen to them, OP.

>>37901861
You could have it. Idk your whole psyche but I get similar msgs like in your op and say the same things, and I'm 19.

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>>37901902
As I said, OP. The fact you're willing to help someone with their struggles even through your own shows a great deal of compassion and kindness. People don't need someone amazing at comforting to feel comforted by someone. Whatever you did, it meant something enough to spur that compliment.

You do have good traits, OP. There's nothing wrong with being proud of and recognizing that.

Yeah, people used to tell me that too. But I'm 25 and won't get close to anyone thinking it's fake. I can't tell you the last meaningful conversation I've heard with a woman that didn't involve work.

>>37901787
Group cohesion is a good lead but I don't feel like it's enough to explain false praise as a phenomenon. Maybe it's a habit, they get rewarded by their parents during childhood if they said cute or nice things about people and continue doing it into later stages of life because compliments are usually met with thanks or praise or simply winning someone's favor.

It's definitely something that ought to die down in adulthood as you should see how this sorta thing only makes things worse for people but I don't know if it does. Not exactly an expert on interpersonal relationships between/with women.

>>37901883
I do agree on the part of us being our worst critics. I cut myself down all the time. I think I'm the worst person even though I'm probably a decent person overall.

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>>37902036
It's easy to bring ourselves down when we're the ones who have to live with our problems. Forgiving ourselves for setbacks takes more confidence in our abilities.

>>37902036
I think this means you're self-reflective and aware of yourself, which is a really good thing until you start blocking yourself off from people as a whole like I used to, thinking they're all sycophants trying to blow you up to take whatever they want from you.

>>37902085
Yeah, I started to block myself away from people recently, and that only made me feel worse, so I'm slowly backing away from doing that.

>>37901639
>you deserve someone super awesome
>you'll find somebody
>oh but not me though