>be me >skinny fat but good at sports, but of course no

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>be me
>skinny fat but good at sports, but of course no chad
>go for a swim
>at this gym I sometimes go to there are those turn stile barriers
>pay and go towards barriers
>can't get through
>try a few more times
>look back to reception in the distance. hoping theyll open the disabled barrier
>try and contort myself through the barrier, leg stuck
>beginning to attract attention of a couple in the cafe next to the barriers
>they try to ignore me so as to minimise the awkwardness
>give them reassuring but panic ridden autist smile
>realise this is a lost cause
>squeeze back out
>see a slight gap between disabled barrier and wall
>as mentioned, skinny fat
>decide to try and shimmy through
>struggling to do so, whilst in direct eyeline of the couple in the cafe
>almost through
>loud siren makes me jump and bang my knee on the barrier
>manage to turn myself around to see panic button on the wall
>can now see look users slowly filtering out and staff gathering, cringe
>realise, shit, I'm stuck now
>staff mixture of angry and confused
>end up having to call the fire brigade
>helped out in front of the entire population of the leisure centre
>At home 2 days later
>mfw when I realise I could have jumped over either barrier