I'm a literal addict that went to rehab, survived multiple

>>37672729
do you have any goals?

>>37672751
I don't now. At 23 I've managed to get an accounting degree, I'm about to get my CPA, and I am a Big 4 audit senior that happens to be a drug addict. I rent the small room where I live.

I literally don't have any goals. I think my main goal right now is using and hitting myself as much soft as I can.

>>37672827
Im 23 and was/am an addict. I know that doesnt make sense. What i mean is i understand ill never be truly sober. I get high on something light at least everyday. Whether its 10 cups of coffee. A little weed or booze if i have money and chain smoke all day. I have a script for gabapentin and i use it every 2-3 days. What im sayin is i feel its ok to self medicate but just try to do it for the better good of yourself instead of trying to escape. I hope u understand what i mean. Use ur addiction for good. If u do speed clean ur home. If ur on opiates use the relaxation to read something good. Etc.

>>37672729
Coming off drugs is hard I still fuck up basic human interaction and its been almost 9 months. Have fun.

Where there any druggie qts at rehab?

Also, why havent you killed yourself already?

>>37673136
>Where there any druggie qts at rehab?
No, crazy women are ugly.

>Also, why havent you killed yourself already?
Tried twice, almost pussied out. The last time I almost OD I wasn't even trying to kill myself, I was scared and I realize I didn't want to die like that. It was a painful and slow "death", but I still woke up the next day.

Also saw a fuckton of shit while being psychotic, people doing violent shit, harming "innocents". The people harming other people were all deressed up in suites and fancy and I could only see half of their face. I even saw a demon with red reptilian skin and big black horns and a pointy smile shooting a red lazer and my brain, and my brain was in front of him floating, at the same time I was feeling agonizing pain.

It's the irrational thoughts that fear me the most about psychosis, like you literally thing you have powers or that voices are screaming in your head or that telepathy exists or irrational shit that doesn't make sense is real in your head, it feels like a stupor attack.