What sexually deviant stuff have you done, /r9k/? I'll start:
>Used to drink with a girl named J a few years ago. She passed out in my bed once, so I slept beside her. Before going to sleep I carefully touched and poked her lips, teeth and nipples to see if she would react or not. Then I went for it and slid my hand inside her pants and panties and touched a pussy for the first time in my life. Fingered her for a while, she moaned, probably thought it was her boyfriend. Then I went to the bathroom and tapped furiously while licking my fingers covered in her juices.
>Missed the last bus home for the night and had to sleep over at J's place one night. Before I left I stole a pair of dirty, smelly panties from her floor. Kept them for years before throwing them out. Sniffed them a lot while looking at pictures of her.
>Posted pictures of J in cum tribute threads, got a few people to cum on her.
>Stole panties from three other girls, two acquaintances and a cousin. Wasn't as exciting as J's though.
>Met a girl online who was sad about having broken up with her boyfriend earlier that same day. Asked her if she wanted me to come to her place, sleep over and fuck her, she said yes. After I spent 3 hours and $80 to get there she just kept crying about her ex boyfriend didn't want anything to do with me, didn't even let me sleep in the same bed as her. I was pissed as fuck. Waited until she fell asleep, went to the bathroom, shot a load of cum into her shampoo bottle, then left her apartment at 3 AM.
>>37633605
>She went and slept on your bed
Boy, that's universal girl-speak for 'Fuck Me'.
>>37633605
I've had sex for years now and I've never once worn a condom. Only got tested last year and didn't have any funny diseases even though I hooked up with the smelliest sluts who themselves ended up catching diseases after the fact.
>>37633642
Or he was completely and utterly friendzoned.
Forgot maybe the best one
>Early December
>Had been on nofap for 20 days, horny as fuck
>J had moved to a city 4 hours away from our hometown. I talked her into the two of us drinking and me sleeping at her place, said I was gonna come down for a musical event in the city (which I didn't really care about).
>We get drunk, it's kinda awkward, she gets really cold and won't sit next to me and keeps saying we're just friends
>Next morning she wants me to get out but I'm hung over and tell her I'll go when I wake up
>She leaves for school
>I get up as soon as she leaves, start looking through her computer
>Found some nudes
>Quickly email them to myself
>Open them up on her computer, take off my pants and fap to them, blowing a huge load all over her floor
>Wipe it up and take train home
>>37633693
are you an argonian
>>37633642
That used to be standard practice during those parties. I've shared that bed with two friends of friends, one male and one female, neither of which I really knew at all. But yeah, J might've intended it as a "Fuck me" thing. I eventually lost my virginity to her. The day after I got a lot of "let's not fuck up our friendship"-talk though.
Here's an oregano bump. Thread seems interesting
>>37633740
trans-argonian I'm sure. I swam through the blackest of marshes and came out unscathed.
>>37633853
Argonians are resistant to disease
>>37633870
That's the joke.jpg.exe.webm.wmv
>>37633847
Hey, thanks. Looks like it could use it.
>>37633605
>Pissed on my girlfriend, then fucked her on my bathroom floor while she was still wet
>Pissed in my girlfriend's mouth
>>37634887
i think the worst of the things you have done is posting here while with a whore.