>parents found out how bad my spring semester went Welp.

>>37615622
It's OK anon. At least you didn't go from a 4.0 to a 2.4 when you started taking actual hard classes and realized you were a complete idiot after deluding yourself into thinking you were a genius.

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>Graduate from college with an MS
>Get nightmares about forgetting about a class

You don't know suffering, OP.

>>37615639
I have the same problem as you do. I keep thinking that the classes I took are gonna be easy, but it's never easy and it never will be.

The only thing stopping me is the fact that I never try hard enough due to my anxiety and crippling fear of being a failure. Lo and behold, I became one.

>>37615663
I can't imagine how hard it is for you, then.

>>37615739
>I never try hard enough due to my anxiety and crippling fear of being a failure

What the fuck does that even mean? You're so anxious that you don't do your assignments? Why don't you just email the professor with questions? You only just need to type. Make friends with another autismo in your class and work on stuff together. Read the textbook. Hire a tutor

Was your response to anxiety to do nothing?! Nothing at all? Not even do your work shittily? Never once asking for help?

>>37615798
I didn't take advantage of my options. I didn't because I thought I didn't need it, and that I'll do the work even shittily, but I didn't do the work at the end of the day.

I kept thinking about negative thoughts all the time that I could've ignored or battled through, but instead I just chose to distract myself by playing video games. I thought that seemed like the easier option, but all I'm doing is not doing the actual work.

I can't imagine how heartbroken my parents are. They had high hopes for me and I just took them down and crushed it behind their backs. I really don't deserve any love from them when all I do is betray them.

I can't believe how dumb I really sound by saying all of this. I apologize if any of these words anger you in any way.

>>37615798
not that guy but
>You're so anxious that you don't do your assignments?
Yes
>Why don't you just email the professor with questions?
I wouldn't know where to begin, and saying "I have no fucking clue where to begin, guide me through this" isn't an option
>Was your response to anxiety to do nothing?! Nothing at all? Not even do your work shittily?
It's sometimes too painful to do an assignment shittily and realize it

>>37615953
>>37615980

"I have no fucking clue" is he question that allows tutors to be around in a university. I think your single most critical error is not asking these obvious questions to people who know the answer. I could get a 5th grader to send an email that is respectful enough to a professor that asks the important questions.

Not doing well in school isn't a betrayal in the classical sense. They can feel angry, betrayed, and disappointed, but it is possible for a parent to understand doing poorly in higher level classes. Relying on yourself isn't enough, ask them for strength, a second chance to use your resources effectively, and communicate that you had higher hopes for yourself.

>>37615639
>falling for the genius meme

There is no such thing as genius brah. Just hardwork and interest.

>>37615953
You are the only anon that ive met that has the exact same issue i had. I fucking failed 3 classes in th entire spring semester doing everything you said. I fucking hate myself.......

>>37616446
Thanks for the words of wisdom, anon. I haven't told them why I had really bad grades, but I really hope they understand how I feel about it.

If not, even when apathy tries to get the best of me, I'll try my best to seek other help about it.

>>37617008
I failed all my four classes this spring, man. I couldn't explain it to them the moment they called me to talk to them. I feared that they'll call bullshit on everything I've said and tell me that I brought this upon myself and tell me to "tough it up", so in the end I just told them I had difficulty with my classes.

I have to tell them the truth today, so maybe this is good for me. I wish I don't have to feel scared about it.

>>37616446
You can get a 5th grader to verbalize his questions about differential equations in a way that makes sense and actually gets him a reasonable explanation?

I've always been terrible at asking for help, and have just had an arrogant professor who mocked me for not knowing how to do something, so I'm more reluctant.

>>37615953
I have the same problem as you, except I'm straddled with debt from the school I have to pay off before I can register for classes...

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>tfw i have a 2.4 because i failed data structures even though i went to office hours, started assignments as soon as possible and put 100% in

CS is hard if you are a brainlet, i switched majors and hopefully i can turn my gpa around before i graduate.