>you find a lamp and rub it >a genie pops out >"I

>>37582772
>tfw i don't know what i want
Just make me dissapear and erase everyone memories about me
a world where i don't exist

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I wish my legs worked, Life is actually agony right now. Nogs at uni drowning me in ''compassion'' and girlfriend working 40hrs a week to support us (inb4 normie). And I've been feeling as if I was an object for social gains, Since my only real friends are semi-related (sister and ''stepbrother''), Or on discord.

>>37582772
this image would have been better if it was pepe in the bottle coming out not some cheese dick fag

first wish -- make it so that i was never born in the first place

second wish --

first wish is an expert lawyer fully versed in contract law

you won't fuck me you stupid genie

>>37582772
Unlimited bank account
That's it

>>37582926
that would destroy the economy and you would be arrested and interrogated almost instantly

absolute power

>1: I wish I could play guitar perfectly and had enough music theory knowledge to compose songs at about the complexity of this song: https://youtube.com/watch?v=HOjBV7d5lNI
>2: I had the confidence and ability to write heartfelt lyrics that at least someone will find touching/inspiring
>3: a gf

>>37582956
>and
that's two wishes buddy

no gf for you

>>37582772
OMNIPRESENSCE,OMNIPOTENCEOMNISCIENCE

How powerful is the genie?
Assuming it's possible, I would ask for unlimited, or an extreme amount of, material wealth, the ability to live forever, and super strength.

>>37582941
Okay, I want all the Rothschild and Rockefeller money in my bank account, no traces

>>37582966
Rip
Maybe my songwriting ability will get me a gf then

>>37582772
- $500k
- $2k/month until I die
- a healthy 20 year old body

>>37582772
>Wish 1
Make my tiny 5x5 dick into a 8x6.5 dick
>Wish 2
Make my body into a big strong bear mode body
>Wish 3
A submissive gf who I could easily dominate with my strength and massive cock

>>37582772
i wanna go back in time so i can be a pirate and explore the world pls

>Knowledge
>Slow down aging so i live to 687
>No longer need to sleep

>>37582772
A fully functioning AI (in form of a qt) with endless ressources, indestructable material and an intellect that goes beyond human imagination that has only 1 purpose, to serve me
>knows how to transfer knowlede incomprehandable by the human mind, I wont risk going mad
>can get me unlimited amounts of money
>is qt
>can choose to transcend humanity or just live an ordinary life

>a crisp $20 bill
>a baseball
>omnipotence

that should sort me out.

>>37582772
I only need one wish, wish for God like powers.

Be immortal, invincible, make my own universe and go live there make the world as I feel it should be etc.

If that's not possible then my 3 wishes are
>Billion dollars, so can generally do what I want, invest my money, buy 4chan etc.
>A cute wife who is completely subservient to me and me alone, and happily so.
>Get rid of all my heath problems like my heart condition and shit.

If possible might try to work in there to make me more attractive, but I'd be fine with those 3.

>people wishing for large sums of money without specifying the details and making it airtight
enjoy the FBI ramming themselves in your asshole

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>>37583061
>>37583013
>submissive
>subservient
no wonder you guys don't have gfs

>>37582772
ANYONE WHO DOESN'T INSTANTLY CHOOSE "Be omnipotent god" IS AN IDIOT

>>37582967
If you have omnipotence, you can CHOOSE to omni-present and -scient. Do you really wanna be in a dirty bathroom with a coked prostitute?

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>>37582772
>Felix Argyle becomes real and he is my bf forever

>>37583161
It's a wish dumbass, of course irl it's impossible to have that so you adjust your standards. If have a wish, can have anything you want, why settle for nothing but the absolute ideal?

>>37583061
>I only need one wish, wish for God like powers.
Right on.

>wish for ar15
>wish for ski mask
>wish for van
>shoots up local preschool
>genie shocked
>"here genie, this is for you!"
>hands genie preschoolers cock
The least i could do for his help

>>37583196
>It's a wish dumbass
yeah I know and it reveals your true character

>turn into an anthropomorphic dog femboy with a big bepis, lots of foreskin
>immortal but can kms if i want to
>all jews and other nonwhites in the world fucking die

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1. I'm rich!
2. I'm rich!
3. I'm independantly wealthy!

>>37583268
thank god genies don't exist

>>37582772
>"i wish to have one wish"
>"what is it"
>"i wish i was never born"

easy

>make me handsome
>make me eternally healthy
>i want you to be free, genie

>>37582772
>a pocket dimension that only I can access in which I am immortal and omnipotent
>the ability to use the power of omnipotence without difficulty, inside aforementioned dimension
>the genie to be able to do anything that makes him happy as long as it doesn't interfere with my wishes

I just want to worldbuild and live in said world as many times as I want.

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>>37583259
>You should feel ashamed for a hypothetical situation that will never happen!

>>37583351
Same, why first try to wish for God like powers, do exactly as you said. It'd be a comfy and interesting existence.

>>37583392
it's a hypothetical that reveals what you're really like and what you value

if I asked you "would you hypothetically stomp on a puppy's head" and you said yes, I'd still judge you even though it's a hypothetical you mong

- 1.000.000$
- I shall study theology and become a part-time pastor if I want to without much effort
- Become a good person around others that makes them feel happy

>restart life with all the knowledge you currently posess
>make me extremely handsome
>All traces of Islam wiped from the world

>>37582772
First wish: Immortality
Second wish: Minor shapeshifting (I can change my appearance/body however I want while still staying human)
Then either:
Whenever I open my wallet, I find enough local currency for three decent meals and a night's stay at a nice hotel.
Or:
Every device I use will never run out of power/memory and will be upgraded to the latest technology whenever I want.

The best wishes. Not exuberant enough to get hunted and cut open for science, and I get to essentially stay a NEET forever.

>>37583259
>yeah I know and it reveals your true character
Meanwhile you whores pretending that the guy who's fucking you is your father and making him choke you and slap you and punch your tits is just "healthy roleplay" that "stays in the bedroom".

>>37582941
A bank card that randomly pulls money from the bank accounts of the richest 1% and is magically untraceable.

>>37583560
I'm not a girl you lunatic

>>37583550
Comfiest wish

>>37582772
I wish I had an infinite number of wishes oh genie.

>>37582772
SEND MY MIND TO MY 10YO BODY
I NEED TO FIX MY LIFE

>>37582772
Just kill me genie

>>37582772
1. Kill the jews(ethnic).
2. Kill the muslims.
3. KILL EVERYBODY WITH A SUB 100 IQ

Then I die, a sacrifice to a better world. No one will know of me, or what I have done for them. I will not be a hero, just another of the untold millions who died that day.

>>37582772
To be happy
Original

>>37582772
>give me a Stacy for a sex slave
>all normies and roasties will be banished from r9k
>all people who aren't white dissapear instantly

>>37582772
>superhuman better than perfect vision
>cash appears in wallet whenever i need it
>become super good at whatever instrument i play

>>37582772
>Premonition
>Infinite Wisdom
>Transfer my existence to an Eternal Omnipresent being
Being omniscient would be boring

>>37582772
1 >Be 30 forever (i'm over 30)
2 >Invulnerable army with superior technology
3 >will save this one for later

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>the ability to send my consciousness to the past at any given moment
>
>

That's enough to do almost everything.

>>37582772
I wish to be happy
completely original i promise

>>37584362
But you can only go back? Why not forward too, so you can return to the present?

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>money lots of money

>intelligence lots of intelligence

>ask what the genie wants since I have everything I need

>>37582772
>for the world to turn into 2D
>for me to get Q-tier omnipotence in the world
>to be everlasting

or if that's too much
>unlimited bank
>immunity to the law
>immortality

>>37582772
>Either unlimited wishes or a shit tons of lamps with genies in it.
If thats not okay then
>Immortality
>No need to eat, sleep or defecate
>Not feeling pain or simply cant get sick or be injured
I might not get unlimited money or a gf or anything of the sort here, but I basically get everything that makes me able to get whatever I want.

>>37582772

>The ability to turn invisible (not even to abuse it, just because social anxiety I'd feel so much more comfortable going out).
>All the necessary knowledge and skill I'd need to become successful in a chosen field.
>All the knowledge and skill I'd every need to survive in the event of shit hitting the fan (war, plague, false allegations, etc).

Enjoy life comfortably.

>>37582772
I want to be the most aesthetically beautiful/ attractive perfect man in every way that the universe has ever seen for my entire life

shape shifting penis, I mean, just shape shifting powers in general
a few billion dollars cash even to me for free by someone legally but secretly
best guitar skills in the world

Most intelligent person on planet
Most charismatic person on planet.
Have my ideal body.

>>37583191
We already are.

>>37586925
Oh shit two other wishes, i would categorize the first one under facial features and body so i guess next would be having perfect ideal straight hair thats thick, soft shiny and NW0 for my entire life

and finally copious amounts of money so i can live life to the fullest

i guess third would be extreme intelligence if perfect hair was included in the first one

omnipotence is a meme desu i just want to live a good life and avoid the existentialism

Wisest man on the planet for my first wish.
Use that wisdom to come up with 2 more wishes.

>>37585411
>immortality
bad idea

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Make everyone feel like I do

>>37587872
smart boy.........

>an endless wellspring of willpower
>the ability to shapeshift intuitively
>immortality

>>37582772
>Immortality, can't die until I want to
>invulnerability, nothing can injure me unless I want it to.
>To be in my 21 year old body with a slightly larger dick and never age

>knowledge
>ability of mind-controlling people
>eternal youth

>>37582986
you know better than that desu

>power to control the four fundamental forces directly
well that's it, i would be invincible, basically a god.

I wish to get sent to my favorite anime's world

>Wish that Social Justice was never invented
>Wish for a time machine
>wish to be able to fuck any women I wanted with out getting them pregnant.
I know that sounds autistic but thats what I would wish for.

>omnipotence that trumps even the genie's powers
>an intrinsic knowledge of how to use said omnipotence
>ask the genie what he wants, wish for that if I think it's good. It'd probably be his freedom so that, but strip away his powers

>>37582772
1. A remote control to teleport and alter time with, certain others may use it
2. A deeper understanding of the world and it's processes
3. The perfect girl. Petite, redhead, makes me happy for once

I hate my life

1. I wish I understood what type of person I am.
2. I wish I could read minds.
3. I wish I could stop time, DIO style (but with no limit).

>>37583152
This. I think I would just wish to win the lottery whenever I bought a ticket. I would get reamed with income tax, but there would be no people snooping.

>>37589042
fine but you get turned into stone, mentally injure, your dick is numb and you get ache

>Wish that I become the omnipresent, all-knowing, all-powerful entity known as god
>Use god powers to hide the other two wishes on Earth in very secluded locations
>Wait to see who finds them and otherwise fuck around with god powers in the meantime
>If I find the wishes of the finders amusing or moving then i'll spare the people on Earth
>If I find them repulsive or otherwise boring then I will destroy mankind

>>37590003
you'll get bored pretty quick

>>37589489
>can't write songs for shit now
>no gf
Maybe that's what's wrong with me r-right guys