>Turn off all the lights downstairs for the night >Run

>>37258551
lel, how old r u ?

>>37258551
>leave a room
>fully exit and then turn around and reach in to turn the light off

>talk on the phone
>peak out the blinders as I talk

>sit down at desk to watch youtube video
>whip out flaccid dick

>walk into bathroom
>immediately check behind the shower curtain

>laying in bed with only ankles exposed
>afraid a monster is going to drag me into the abyss

>lay down for the night
>plan to get a good 7 hours of sleep
>check alarm on phone to be sure
>get back up to make sure I locked the front door
>lay back down, check phone to see how much sleep I can get
>get back up to pee
>lay back down, check alarm on phone again
>getting only 6 hours of sleep now
>angry, can't sleep

>wake up after 4 hours of sleep

File: 1477141757620.jpg (35KB, 484x497px) Image search: [Google]

35KB, 484x497px

>tfw given up on life so hard I wish for monsters to come out of the dark and kill me

>check fridge for food
>check cupboards
>check fridge
>not eat

>>37258687
try black magic forums. in arabic.

>>37258687
>tfw you stare into the void of your dark room silently waiting for the shadow people who never show up

>hear upstairs neighbors make a noise
>stand silent for 20 minutes just listening for anything else

>take a shit
>check my shit
>wash my ass with pressurized water
>it fell over other person shit
>glocked the shitter
>fill 6L bucket
>flush the shit
>felt like the toilet is thanking me
>go wash hands

>>37258763
>felt like the toilet is thanking me
,,T-thank you A-a-anon-kun for flushing y-your huge s-s-shit.''

>>37258763
>shit such a volume that the toilet flushes itself.

>sleep in tighty whiteys
>afraid if someone comes in bedroom and think weird of me

>hear something in the carage
>take big butcher knife from kitchen
>stab in the air few times (training)
>get pumped up
>go down stairs silently
>break the carage door
>it was a plank that fallen
>nothing abnormal
>think to yourself to not care next time.
>what if it becomes real burglary next time and i would be offguard.
>struggle in my mind, the two sounds are arguing each other.
>brain overheats
>energy gets turned into anger
>stab my bed
>it didnt pierce
>wow wtf what if i couldnt stab the criminal
>get more angry
>stab another time
>it pierce
>get sattisfied for a second
>get angry again that i had to pop my mattres.

>raising or lowering the tv volume to a number divisible by 5

everyone in my house is like this oddly enough

File: 1448964456550.gif (2MB, 330x270px) Image search: [Google]

2MB, 330x270px

>>37258672

fucking hell

every single time

>go to bed
>stick hand down trousers
>hold flaccid penis until falling asleep

>>37258929
>only changes volume in square numbers
>laptop's volume goes in twos
>4, 16, 36, 64, 100

Don't even start me, mate.

>>37258687
That white Pepe's arm is fucked

File: 1475821784155.jpg (73KB, 349x1160px) Image search: [Google]

73KB, 349x1160px

>be poorfag
>around 4 am, still awake, decide to go for a piss
>carefully creep through house, despite living alone
>spend almost a minute to open door without creaking
>poorfag bathroom has no windows
>light switch outside
>don't turn on light, enter, shut door behind me
>very quietly
>feel my way through the inky blackness, totally blind
>find the toilet, at last
>sit down
>realise the lid wasn't up
>arse is frozen
>mfw

Every time.

>>37258989
kek, this sometimes.

File: 1491123422284.jpg (299KB, 578x900px) Image search: [Google]

299KB, 578x900px

>>37259027
>white Pepe

W-what?

>spill spicy sauce on shirt
>look at it
>it looks at me
>suck it off of the shirt

>>37259163
the wet textile tastes good.

File: 1495340198942.jpg (42KB, 640x480px) Image search: [Google]

42KB, 640x480px

>>37258695
>only have sausage rolls and sliced cheese in house
>don't want to eat them over again at every meal, raised having different meals every day
>idea.png
>just eat one giant meal of sausage rolls and sliced cheese, right in the middle of the day
>I wont have to eat them twice

>take cheap laptop, lie on bed
>comfy feeling takes over as I prepare to browse my favourite Indonesian thread-weaving forum
>remove underwear

>crack open some eggs
>remove the white parts cuz its icky

If my mom makes scrambled eggs for me without me knowing i get very upset because she doesnt remove the white icky things and i get gag reflexes trying to eat them

>>37258805
>sleep in full clothes, with a pair of spare trainers I don't wear outside
>mfw I am ready for anything

>cuddle with my shotgun every night
good luck you faggy demons