When did you realize that you were a bad person? If me as a

how bad are you my man?

iktf

>was once a young kid
>wanted to be a good person, have a family, etc
>now am a bald fat loser with a beard

you never really know what you're gonna come out as

>in elementary
>some kid has a nice watch
>he takes it off and puts it in locker
>break into his locker and take it
No regrets. I do not give a fucking shit

>>36943847
If me as a child met me today i'd tell child me to run to a fucking orphanage cause he's a year away max from my parents relationship imploding where they both take it out on me because taking it out on each other means they just yell at eachother and feel worse than before.

It'll save my brain and body from that illness they refused to even acknowledge until they had to call an ambulance for an at the time dead body cause state requirements and laws would insist i get checked monthly for illnesses.

I try my best to be a good person but I know I'm just faking it. I can't stop having bad thoughts, jealous, cynical, spiteful, vengeful, derogatory, racist thoughts. I don't wanna be like that. Self-awareness is nice but there's a level of sourness that came along with it. I don't like being sour, it hasn't gotten me anywhere in life. And when I try to change my thinking, I know I'm just putting on an act. Feigned kindness only lasts so long but frustration and anger and other kinds of bad intrusive thoughts always take over.

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Homu is a good girl. Please use a more fitting image next time, OP.

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I used to bite other kids and I spat in a swimming instructor's face when I was little. I also told a tutor to get out of our house even though he came to help me.

Realized a couple years ago that I was legitimately an awful person. I'm trying to fix it but some habits are hard to break so it comes out more often than I'd like. If I see somebody who needs help nowadays I'll try and help em as best I can, and I think it works a little since my neighbors seem to like me and will ask me for help with little things often. But actual friends all still think I'm a bad person and I don't know what I'm doing wrong.

>>36944353
Sounds kind of lewd when you pair it with an anime girl.
>Tfw no bitemarks

>>36943847
moral is fiction, it does not exist in nature, only inside human ego. you live on the best terms you can't.

>>36944424
What habits? What have you done that makes your friends think you're bad?

Fuck that kid. He was a naive autist who got what he wanted anyway. He'll understand me when he learns the hard way like I did.

>>36945435
I tend to say things like "I don't care" and dismiss people easily, I can also be semi argumentative about small things without really realizing it. I sometimes mock people in a fun way but apparently people don't like that and take me seriously. I dunno why my friends think so since you would think they'd be used to me by now.

If I met a child me, I'd slit his throat.
It'd be mercy on my part.

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>tfw you're a victim of circumstance
>tfw people don't like you because you're "bitter" but you're "bitter" because people don't like you

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>>36943847
I don't know when, I just came to realize over time that I'm a fucking worthless subhuman that needs to be gassed ASAP
>>36944235
nice picture

>>36943847
kid me was actually a much bigger dickhead than I am now

>>36943847
I was a total self-assessment dick when I was young. Young me would be slightly disappointed.

>tfw kid me was every bit of a cunt, except back then I was delusional enough to believe that I'm doing good things for everyone

Now I can't even have that delusion. I'm a disgusting failure of a human being who would feel sad over a broken vase but not feel anything over being mean and at times needlessly cruel to people.

I don't know which me is more disgusting. At least I'm not my father. That cunt still thinks that people don't like him because they are bad ones, not because he is a sack of shit.

>>36945888
>you will never kill Homura

>>36946543
Go get cucked again, Sayaka.

I started browsing 4chan when i was 15. It's been a slow descent since then

>>36946543

That is a pretty thrawn and esoteric feel.
Have some music to match it:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ii3oEVz1rVg&ab_channel=IanT.

Is this what it feels like?

>>36946613
>tfw been here since 12
never had a chance

When I realized I could just dispose of people that I got bored of or fazed me in any way. With no remorse, rather an agony for the lack of remorse.

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>>36944121
This is fucking me. I used to be a happy good intentioned person, but then I free up and realized life wasnt going to be the sunny days and green grass I hoped it would be. I saw bad guys winning all around me, while I put in the extra mile got shit on. I used to think "I shouldn't do that, that's wrong", now I think "this is wrong, but no one gives a shit about me anyway so fuck them".

I have become bitter and old

>>36943847

Nah kid me would understand adult me. We both make the same fake "I'm not happy at all but no-one really cares and I'm expected to look happy" smile.

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Cheated on my ex multiple times with prostitutes and didn't care at all. No guilt, no shame.

I feel a little bit of regret now that our relationship is over, I think. Not sure why.

Would probably continue doing it should I manage to get a new gf

>>36943847
When I was against punching a nazi

>>36943847
If I met the child I'd kill him for being such a stupid coward

I may be a bad person but at least I'm not that person anymore.

>>36943847
When I repeatedly pepper sprayed my bully until he was on the ground, put my foot on his neck and threatened to shatter his lower spine with a hammer. He was a bad person but I am much, much worse.

When I found evidence (chat logs and pics) of my father cheating on my mom while fixing his laptop, I never told her and in stead used it to blackmail my father.
Telling my mother would possibly have led to divorce and would have jeopardized my own financial stability.

If me as a child met me today he would be disgusted at what a tame pussy I've become.

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After society treated me like I was nothing I realised that I was nothing and what I did meant nothing.
So now I treat people like they are nothing. My feelings never get hurt anymore.
I became the strong guy that I needed as a child.

I was never a good person, I was merely pretending to be one as a child and was getting shit on everyday.
I don't feel any respect to anyone, even the 2 only genuine friends I ever had.

Now I only feel hatred and disgust, constantly trying to conceal how hopelessly weak I am, because I'm too self-conscious and paranoid to not give a fuck.

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>>36943847
when my dad was in ICU because of an accident with slim chances of survival and all I could think about was that I won't be able to afford the shit that I do now without him

I cry when I'm playing fucking Mass Effect but wasn't even feeling that sad when my dad was about to die

luckily he made it

>>36943847
Age 12/13
:(

Young me hates me and i hate him tol

>>36943847
I realized I was slowly getting worse and worse. I was a relatively happy child even though I have a fucked-up family, but during middle school I started resenting people and stopped going to the school because of anxiety, fear and resentment. It got even more terrible in high school where I dropped out of it and now I'm just a bitter, cynical piece of shit spends his day on a mongolian cartoon board. I can't stand seeing happy people no matter where am I and no matter who are these people. I just can't fucking stand and I know this isn't their fault. I should have killed myself when I dropped out of high school, honestly.

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>>36943847
I don't believe I'm a bad person, I still have good intentions for what I do for my family. But that's it, I don't care about anyone outside of my family. I never had a rough childhood, everyone was supportive, caring, compassionate, it was great. But I hate how the world only behaves like that towards those who are deemed normal. Everyone has such superficial beliefs and lifestyles that it makes me sick. I've shut out the world from what I care about, because I hate everything about it too much. I used to want to be an environmental scientist, working to have a healthier world. I couldn't give two shits nowadays, let it burn for all I care. So I guess you could say I'm a bad person since I hate everyone and everything outside of a small handful of people and things.

Also I want an excuse to post Homu.

Whenever I see a character in fiction or even a person in real life, who is genuinely optimistic and full of wonder and kindness and hope and positivity, I get legitimately jealous and frustrated. That's the kind of person I would like to be, but the fact that I'm even having these kinds of thoughts means I never can be. Cynicism and pessimism are a Pandora"s box.

I think it burns me up because I used to be that way, when I was very young. I used to love life. But enough years of being abused and metaphorically shit on ruined my faith in myself, in others, and in God. Nothing happens for a reason, there is no karma, no "just desserts", and no heaven. The meek aren't gonna inherit anything. Why am I such a retarded edgelord?

>>36948603
Do you hate Homu?

>>36949596
I like Homu but her morals are ambiguous.

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>>36943847
emma is weak

I don't think I'm a good person

I don't think I'm a bad person

I think the net positivity and negativity I give to the world are about equal

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>>36949596
Homura is my wife, I love her very much

>>36949763
Do you do lewd things to her at night?

>>36943847
People treat me horrible. I got bullied a lot for no reason. Why would they treat me so bad if I wasn't a shit person?

>>36950134
I have pure thoughts about her and we only do lewd acts when both of us mutually consent

Probably around 19 or so. I deserved to be friendless, I would always fuck over people trying to be my friend of their own initiative ever since I was a kid. Cleaned out a game account entrusted to me for powerleveling, being told who their crush was only to immediately tell a close friend of the person for no gain of my own, making a promise with some brokenhearted guy in high school to both stay away from a manipulative cunt of a girl only to get the information I needed and go back to her. I'd always been a little shithead but it took me almost 2 decades to realize.

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>>36943847
>met this boy in fourth grade
>quickly become best friends and obsess over anime together
>around thanksgiving break I realize that I like him in a gay way
>try to ignore it and end up going to his house for his birthday and the feelings get worse
>tells me that he thinks he's gay when we're watching a movie in music class
>ignore it and pretend I didn't hear
>can't be gay because crazy religious mom and I think I'm going to go to hell
>Start ignoring him and being mean to him and playing with his emotions and manipulating him
>eventually make him cry
> Realize I'm piece of shit faggot
>keeps trying to get me to hangout with him until the beginning of 6th grade
>Realise I'm probably a sociopath or something is really wrong with me and after that only manipulate people when I really need to. And slowly get better control of my manipulative tendencies over the years.


Alex I'm really sorry I did that to you back then.