You know how they say you shouldn't get caught up other

if youre gonna die anyways and hate your life might as well drop everything tomorrow and go do some shit. why dont i do this

>>36933364
Because you don't wanna die, you just don't wanna live

>>36933364
I dunno. And I don't know whats been holding me back but with a timer on the clock may as well.

>>36933411
>>36933428
nah i just put shit off because im content and get money to go to a shitty community college. ill probably snap after all that fails.

Sei a cute

People who say that just don't want to accept people live shitty or depressing lives
I've seen people I went to high school with or people younger than me do so much in relatively short amount of time
I'm only 22 and have done nothing but be a useless neet and failure
I'm trying to keep motivation but I haven't had that since I was a kid
I feel so brain dead trying to learn practical things as well

i don't advertise it on social media but sometimes i wonder if people do this with me.

there's a way of framing my life where i
>graduated high school
>went to a great college
>wore my normie mask so well that people actually believed it
>went on a ton of trips, often to far away places
>graduated with the highest honors
>landed a full-time professional job right out of school
>put it on hold to go to an ivy league graduate program instead
>still haven't even turned 24

sounds pretty impressive i guess?

it's not
it does not make me happy
it does not make me feel anything at all
all the on-paper success on the world doesn't mean anything unless you create meaning for it

i don't mean this to sound like a standard "grass is greener on the other side" kind of thing.

i mean to say that whether or not you interpret your life as a success comes down not to whether you objectively did "something" with your life, it comes down to how you feel.

maybe the thing we want, but will never achieve, is not being a success but, instead, the feeling of being a success (or, at least, of not wasting your life)

what i'm getting at is that if you feel empty, "doing something" will not necessary remedy that emptiness

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>>36933700
Ignoring the subjectivity of feeling, even if you're depressed out of your mind. You've still done something. You've had a degree, you've been places and done things. It is impressive regardless of how you feel. To be honest, to me your post sounds like a rich person saying "money doesn't make me happy" maybe it doesn't, but it sure as fuck makes being sad a lot easier.

Call me bitter, and maybe I am a little. But regardless of how you feel you've still accomplished more than me, thus the potential for happiness and fulfillment was there. I haven't even had the potential for it. I've sat alone in a room thinking about how I'm slowly dying for the past 5 years.

On the other hand, all of those experiences have opened potential opportunities and connections for you. Compared to me you're objectively at a net positive because I lack everything you could potentially have.

>>36933860
money is actually fairly immaterial in all of this. i've spent most of my life in education, i am not rich, i have actually made startlingly little money.
that being said, i agree that having more money would make my sad life less sad, as it would for literally everyone.

my point is more that i can arrange my life into bullet points of my accomplishments that make me sound successful.
social media allows people to do this with decontextualized bits of visual media from their life.

another reading of me could easily be
>social retard
>only gets through life by pretending to be normal
>no gf ever
>no real skills except useless abstract analysis
>no real passion for anything
>horrible defeatist attitude towards everything in life
>no hobbies beyond video games and weed
>destined for failure, saved repeatedly by pure happenstance

this is equally as accurate as the first description.

both, i think, are meaningless.

the only way objective accomplishments will provide you with emotional fulfillment is if you are the kind of person who is truly only emotionally fulfilled by checking boxes off on a list
i suspect you are not that kind of person either, but maybe i'm wrong