>be american >get fat, get shot, become poor because surgery

well there is always iceland and maybe greenland, though i hear it could get a little cold in there.

>>36887885
>be african
>be african
kek'd

>>36887931
>iceland
>get mauled by polar bear

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>>36887885
>be slav
>don't get fat cause food is kinda expensive, don't get shot since guns are not easy accessible, everyone around you is poor to so don't care
>behead isis
>no suicide because no soap and ropes
>not african
>hunt on bears in taiga
>win war against nazi Germany
Picrelated
Now finished with communist propaganda I can tell you that you can serve 3.5 years for catching pokemon, or reposting images in internet.
Nobody values education from your country.
Get killed by boy who's dad is rich or elected official. (He will face only suspended sentence at best)
Get fired if you're not straight.

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>>36887945
u some kind of special stupid?

>>36888000
Well you seem to think isis beheads europeans

>>36887985
Russia has one of the highest suicide rates in the world.

>>36888019
Iceland is green
Greenland is ice

>>36888039
MUH VODKA MUH FIGHTING MUH ANGRY

>>36888039
Also an even higher rate of HIV transmission that the government is actively working to cover up.

>>36888019
i was pointing out that there are no polar bears on iceland stupid.

>be Canadian
>never get assaulted
>never get attacked
>hit a moose in the road but healthcare is free

lmaooo at the African one

>>36888039
I know, the greentext part was absolute meme. I was not serious at all.

>>36887985
>don't get shot since guns are not easy accessible
Considering the amount of videos with russian guys who shoot things with kalashnikov i'm not sure of that

>>36888091
Just like there are no isis beheadings in europe so my post fits in perfectly with yours.

>>36888101
>Be Canadian
>look at a woman
>get imprisoned for look-rape
>during trial you mention that the concept of look-rape is ridicolous
>get chemically sterilized and sent to a labor camp for thought-crimes and look-rape
>the profits of your labor is sent to the victim and her black lover

>be australian
>get killed by venomous animal and lose war against emu

>Implying this even happens to anyone

Truly a paradise in the middle of hell, this great island so far away from the sufferings of the northern hemisphere.

>be Swiss
>watch Europe burn around you

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>TFW Jew masterace

>>36888153
>be jewish male
>get mutilated at birth

>>36888136
Based Swiss, blessed with the only sensible government in the continent

>be nz
>people forget you exist

>>36888073
The growth of HIV positive people in Russia beats all 'records' of african countries, but the government hires orthodox priests to go on TV and tell people that there is no HIV, AIDS is a result of stresses, and that condoms don't work since latex is porous material (try to blow it up, idiots, it holds air perfectly) and it lets semen pass.

>>36888173
which state is nz? sorry im not american.

>>36888170
Please don't jinx it anon. The Zurich city government is already infected with the green/red plague.

>>36888153
>be israeli jew
>stabbed by a random pali in the middle of day

>>36887931
>greenland
>same thing of asia but with cold

>>36887885
>be from antartica
>age of consent is 5

>>36888181
The HIV-AIDS connection is a total scam. Many Russians have incredibly unhealthy lifestyles. This cause AIDS symptons to appear.

>>36888181
I would figure most of Russia's HIV problems are more related to drug-use than sex?

>>36887885
>Be South America
>Get Yellow fever and die in hospital queue

>>36888153
>be jew
>get gassed

>>36888225
People here don't know shit about sex here, let alone about HIV. Some of them think that if you pee after sex you won't get pregnant.
Though I'll try to find some statistics on HIV transition trough drug use.

>>36888271
I found this, which paints a pretty grim picture admittedly.
http://foreignpolicy.com/2016/11/22/russias-silent-hiv-epidemic-fskn-krokodil-aids-public-health-putin/

>>36887885
Somehow being Austrialian still seems the nicest.

>>36888190
You memein'?

Ameri bot here why don't you post full story?

>be American
>get mutilated by Jews at birth
>have to fallow social standards religiously to avoid being seen as a robot
>expected to be macho Chad if male, non apples if female
>literally a 50/50 chance at a good life
>family kicks you out at 18 to die on the streets
>well, better pull up muh bootstra-
>friendly oppressed Blackman who made an oopsie shoots you
>have to pay 1jillian dollers to recover
>if not fat already, there's no escape now
>get fat
>NEETbux suck here
>work retail until 86 years old

>>36888194
How did you learn to type Mr. Polar Bear? Where did you also learn to lie?

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>>36887885
>be european
>get beheaded by isis
Not if you live in a small town like me

>>36888448
Theres not a single gym in all of germany that isnt full of refugees in all of germany. Stop lying.

>canada
>new zealand

They really are top tier choices. Canada has chinks but if you live somewhere remote you shouldn't see them

>>36887885
well there buddy sounds like eastern yuroop is just the place for you

>>36887985
>slav
>not african

>be arab
>get killed because of terrorism

>>36887885
>be african
>have aids
ftfy