>last of my friends have "moved on" >complete

>>36875216
i-i'll be your friend anon
orignal

>>36875216
We can be friends fembot.

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>>36875216
>inability to move on from the past
>all I do is reminisce about old friend groups I magically found
>think over situations and wonder what would have happened if I had done x instead of x
>look at their profiles and remember all the fun things we did
>in my mind they all happened yesterday instead of 1+ year ago
>intense loneliness, want desperately to go back to them
>situations are different and it wouldn't be the same
>long for another group that I can replace the memories with
>not good enough to find friends or groups unless they stumble into me

>>36875435
>remember all the fun things we did
jesus fuck this...

>>36875376
>fembot
where is this assumption coming from?

>>36875435
>1+ year ago
don't worry after 5+ years its like nothing, only the first two years are rough then you get used to it and build yourself a comfy routine and world

>>36875577
The anime girl picture.

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>>36875435
>become part of a friends group in 2006
>be ghosted by my two closest friends within the group in 2010 and treated horribly the one time we spoke again in 2012
>have been involved in some friendship circles since then, but always stay on the periphery and never get too emotionally involved
>no matter how beautiful a friendship group is at the beginning, it will probably be spoiled somewhere down the line

>>36875693
>newfag tripfag doesn't know about girls (male)
Bend over, sonny boy, and let these girls teach you a thing or two about how this place works.

>>36875701
>>no matter how beautiful a friendship group is at the beginning, it will probably be spoiled somewhere down the line
by a girl

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>>36875661
Does it ever truly get any better? Before the group I had found last year the oldest one I had lost was only 3 years. I'm sick of thinking about it, I know it can never be the same but my mind can't move on.

>>36875701
I just want another chance again at a nice group of friends. I didn't do anything to the last one, I just distanced myself for a bit, and when I tried to come back something had occurred and I was left alone

>>36875779
Yes, actually. She's the one who ghosted the group, and she roped her orbiter into going along with her because he was a spineless white knight with no will of his own. He was also a dick to me that last time we spoke in 2012 because she ordered him to do so.

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>>36875216
For me I saw it coming a mile away.

When the fire dies out don't mourn the ashes or you will freeze to death. Make a new fire.

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>>36875216
>tfw your BPD activates and you delete and ghost people
>tfw you are now known as the guy who deletes people
>tfw you can't click with anyone

>>36875216
iktf anon. I cucked my ex and she turned all my friends against me. im too old for r9k, discord, and kik groups because its populated with 16-21 year old faggots.

>>36875890
>For me I saw it coming a mile away.
I saw it too , the guy got married and I saw less and less of him,
until he and his wife moved away, maybe its what they call delayed emotional response but a few days after I helped them pack up and move it just hit me like a hammer,
all the good memories we had together came flooding in and then the realization that I literally don't have anyone anymore, I almost started crying at work.

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>>36875985
>cucked my ex

Cheaters are the worst. The WORST.

>>36876054
yea it basically ruined my life

No friend group can last forever. Friendships can last a lifetime, but that's very, very rare, and even then it will go through peaks and valleys where you'll interact more or less. Everything is transient, that's just how life is. You can't fixate on the past, just be grateful that your large could intersect for as long as they did, and that both of your lives were enriched and changed forever by it. Nothing can take away the good times that you did have.

>>36876317
Lives, not large. Autocorrect sucks.

>>36876317
>just be grateful that your large could intersect for as long as they did, and that both of your lives were enriched and changed forever by it

If the friendships reach a natural conclusion, sure. If your friend deliberately abandons you out of the blue despite never treating them badly, gives you an eternal silent treatment, and refuses to explain their feelings or what exactly happened, it spoils things so much that it's hard to be thankful for the earlier times.

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>really lonely and always looking for attention
>clingy to everyone that bothers to ever talk to me
>no friends even now

I know its not healthy to try to feel better by getting new ones, by how do you even do that? Most of the threads here are awful, and discord servers are always too big to feel like I'm part of a community

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>>36875946
>deletes and ghost people
>you are now known as the guy who deletes people
What action could you possibly have taken, or left undone to have prevented this?

>have a group of friends
>they get married
>haven't seen them for 7 years now

"Friends". Also women ruin everything.

>>36876442
I still have never used discord,
i dont even know what that is (is it like vent)?

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>>36876447
>What action could you possibly have taken, or left undone to have prevented this?
Did you not read that I have BPD?

>>36876458
Its kind of like teamspeak except voice chat is optional
>>36876473
BPD? Whats that anon? Is it bipolar depression?

>>36876506
Borderline Personality Disorder. Basically, anon is completely blameless.

>>36876506
Borderline Personality Disorder.
how is that not roignal

>>36876473
most people who claim that are full or crap so I just go ahead and ignore that they said it.

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>>36876529
And thus makes people like me who actually have it even worse.

>bled all of my friends after the past montsh
Oh well, at least I'm used to loneliness, so it's only mildly depressing.

I'd only need one good one anyway, but I can't even have that.

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>>36875740
posting anime girls is more indicative of an adult man who watches cartoons and (I'll boldly predict) grew up with an absent or distant father. they're not necessarily the girl (male) type
I understand that distinction is lost on some people now that its okay for men to be weird "tranny" camwhores and what not
the world has gone insane

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>>36876553
Why are people with BPD inappropriately seductive?
Are you a sultry, insincere flirt?

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>>36876473
To be honest can't even begin to imagine the thought process of an emotional thinker.
At some level you must have realized that your actions would have repercussions which you would come to regret afterwards.
If you were unaware of those, then it can't be helped, but if you were aware of them and yet you go against that... well... I guess that really makes me think

>>36876563
>I'll boldly predict
for the first 13 years of my life my father was only home during the weekends.

>>36876442
I'll be friends with you anon, I don't mind if you're clingy. send your discord to my throwaway email and i'll add you
[email protected]

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>>36876580
I'm not seductive though? I don't flirt either.

>>36876604
It can't be helped and I feel like shit.

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I know this isn't /adv/ but I figured I might as well ask.

>painfully lonely and depressed and anxious
>lost most if not all of my friends
>always worrying about stuff and looking for steam bfs because I'm a degenerate and mentally ill

What do I even do? Regarding how I'm clingy and all of the other stuff wrong with me, should I just not bother trying to meet any new friends or people until I'm no longer fucked up?

>>36876442
People are just too young here.
And the people in the 25+ threads are to jaded to do anything other than monologues (they barely reply to each other).

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>>36876616
same
he tried to make up for it by being my really permissive best friend, which was really fun but, being an sperg with 3 NT older siblings (who tormented me), raised alternative by a female portuguese nanny and a loving but mentally ill mother, I've become a beta manchild and a loser and he's dead

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where can you even make friends now?

>>36876785
sometimes steam threads pop up on r9k

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>>36876563
My dad is cool! One time a chainsaw wouldn't crank up, so he grabbed it by the blade and beat it against the wall while screaming incoherently until his whole hand was bloody. It was manly!

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>>36876796
Nobody adds me anymore.

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>>36876563

>My father passed away when I was 13 and now Im a degenerate weeb
I guess you wouldnt be wrong anon.

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>>36876857
Same I know that feel
Originally

>>36876857
Anon could you post your steam please? I might add you!

>highschool friends drifted away
>they were my only friends
only kind of found myself in that group incidently
I literally dont know how to make friends now im fucked.

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>>36876804
this is in fact another very real possibility, that I forgot enumerate
father issues are pretty common, being the take home

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>>36876936
Having a dad with anger problems, you mean? Mine was fairly normal before Vietnam.

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>>36876873
I just wish someone would tell me to fuck off so at least I don't have false hope anymore.

>>36876796
But dont the steam threads always get deleted?

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>>36877032
maybe we can be lonely together?
What's your steam?

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>realize that I'm the only one who ever initiates contact with my "friends"
>stop initiating contact
>they never contact me again

>>36877050
theres way too many needy gay guys here for me to feel safe to give out a steam

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>>36876989
just not having a father who was present in/interested by /able to raise a son, in a reasonable manner daysue

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>>36877068
>dont initiate conversations or talk with any of my "friends"
>remove them
>the next day they all ask me on discord why I removed them

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>>36877087
I'm not needy or gay but it's ok.
Guess i'll leave now....

>>36875823
What happened anon? origanalodges

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>>36876681
>It can't be helped and I feel like shit.
Can't it really be helped though? maybe you're right,
perhaps self awareness in situations like this might cause you to reconsider your actions and mull them over instead of acting impulsively.

But if you can accept the way you are now it doesn't interfere too much with your own happiness,
then that's fine I suppose and you have little no reason to change.

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>>36877176
I have no happiness that's the point anon. I'm just a lonely piece of shit and everyone hates me now.

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>>36877237
I feel the same way anon, I dont have any advice to give since I'm feeling just like you do, but I hope things get better.

invartro#5858

I need new friends and I don't mind listening to some complaining and trying to make you feel better.

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>>36877176
not that anon but also BPD with a similar story
I'm aware of the consequences my actions will have, and that they're undesirable. This knowledge does not quiet the internal screaming or allow me to think logically, count to ten, use CBT exercises, breathe in lavender, smoke a cigarette or what have you, and then act rationally.
That's just not how it works. I'm a sorry cunt, in great internal pain and in a better world, I would be set up in a hermit cell in rural England and not sucking jew dick for money and taking xanax at the top of every hour until my bi-weekly pass out so that I don't kill myself.
sorry for the spergblog and I don't think you intended it to sound this way, necessarily, but I read your post as "just b yourself, but don't be a piece of shit like you are"
I'm posting this nonsense because my post quality is awful even when I don't break down half way through it and I'll have spent over a minute writing this by the time I finish this addition

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>>36877303
You can't feel the same way anon. You didn't ghost or delete massive people and they are on revenge for you.

so uh, whats ghosting?

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>>36877389
I meant in regards to being lonely and having no happiness. And I did purge my entire list , but it was for a different reason Either way I hope things work out anon

>>36877442
Abruptly cutting ties with someone without a word of goodbye. You go to sleep best friends with someone, you wake up blocked on everything.

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>>36877445
You can't feel the same level of loneliness and no happiness with someone that has BPD unless you yourself have it.

>>36877467
ah for some reason I thought it meant stalking.

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>>36877487
Oh, my bad anon. I'm sorry

>>36877532
You aren't actually sorry just trying to saveface now but it's ok.

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>>36877553
BPD at work I see.

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>>36877570
Nice joke anon.
originally

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>>36877553
dude, stop being a turd.

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I lost all my pals too OP
Being alone sucks

>>36875216
I know this feel.
>only had 3 friends growing up
>one moved to cali
>one moved to Russia with his gf
>one died in war in Afghanistan

Still in hometown all alone. Town has been flooded with Chinese immigrants who don't like white people, and I'm white. There aren't even any of those Asian female into white male memes. The azn grills won't date outside of their race because their parents would disown them, and family is really important to them.

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this whole conversation is starting to become a mess with people popping in and out.

>>36877237
I suppose we differ in that.
I know that I'm alone, and that unless I change myself that won't change.
But I've asked myself whether or not I want to put up with my fears and anxiety or be alone.
I've concluded that for the rewards the effort is too big, so I'll just have to accept that.

>>36877369
Like I said before, I can't even imagine your thought process, so instead I'm sharing mine.
It was supposed to have a change or accept yourself vibe.
Take as long as you need to write a post, I do.

>>36875435
what >>36875661 said

There is a group of guys I make small talk with in classes since last semester but that's the extent of my social life. Haven't had an actual friend since 2010, and even then it was me reaching out desperately for 2+ years before that.

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Join the club buddy, I am tresh man

>>36876683
You have too try, even if you fall on your face you still have a chance too find someone. It sucks but nothing's easy I guess

>used to play a lot of games and browse shitty forums
>had many internet friends I could talk to
>moved away from that and slowly lost contact with them all
>only had my friend from highschool left
>he was the only one who managed to get close enough to me to be able to comfortably talk with him about anything
>went to uni and our ways split
>have a few "friends" but noone I could really open up to, most of our talk is just uni related shit
>more and more lonely and depressed
>sometimes feel like I want to hug someone and just cry, but the closest thing is a pillow

I-It will get better r-r-right?

>>36878239
>. It sucks but nothing's easy I guess
https://youtu.be/czY9kWNXDDI?t=28

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>tfw 30 years old and seen this multiple times
>too dumb to get a degree of learn something useful
>have to pretend you are less than 21 to fit in
>this will happen until i die

>>36878278
>>sometimes feel like I want to hug someone and just cry, but the closest thing is a pillow
you can hire an escort,
I read an article by a former lady of the night surprisingly a lot of men use them just to have a shoulder to cry on.

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>>36875216
Haha, this is me a few months ago

internet friends don't make good replacements

This is currently happening to me. It's all my fault due to being a fuck up manchild. While I still want to talk about vidya, they want to talk about what ever the fuck mature people talk about. And then they slowly saw me as someone to be pitied and not a friend or even an equal. Don't fall for the NEET meme, /r9k/.

>>36875693
Kek how new are you even. I bet you were still in diapers when I was this new

>>36876442
I love clingy people. would you be interested in being friends? I've got nothing better to do with my time..

>>36876442
What do you mean by clingy? Are you the type who won't let people sign off if they need to/want to?

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Envy#6291 - Add me on discord, anon

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>>36878608
>>36875216
I messed up
Envy#6291 - Add me on discord :D

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>>36878436
And instead talk about shit you don't want to talk about.
Do shit you don't want to do.
Be what you are not, genius.

>>36875435
It's alot worse when you only had 1 of those friends and it was your mistake that you lost contact with them. I still cry sometimes

>>36878662
Can I originally add you too?

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>>36877765
>I've concluded that for the rewards the effort is too big, so I'll just have to accept that.
Try that again. You mean the rewards for the effort put in is to shit.

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>>36878892
Yes you can originally add me too

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>be gaybot
>guy asks me out
>don't really like him romantically but can't say no to people
>now six months into a relationship with someone I have no feelings for

AMA

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>>36878907
Fuck, that's what I meant to say.
That's what happens when I rewrite sentences too often.

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>through dumb luck make a friend on /r9k/, talk to him through kik
>share some interests and stuff
>have genuinely good conversations for the first time in years
>get ghosted a couple days ago
Why do I even try...

>>36876458
It's a million times better than vent anon, it's a cross between skype and teamspeak, with a nice UI. It's meant for gamers, but people from camwhores, to companies, to robots use it

>>36878972
worth trying?

>>36878972
WilI you be my bf pls

>>36879341
>WilI you be my bf pls
No

>>36879211
>It's a million times better than vent
That's not saying much lmao

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>>36875216
I never had any true friends. Just acquaintances that may or may not share similar interests. They come and go like changing seasons. I think real friends are impossible for a person like me. I simply don't care that much about other people. I don't even really care about myself that much. I'm just on a mission to live the easiest, most comfortable life possible and to achieve a superhuman level of zen. Anyone else know this feel?

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>>36875216
>>36875435
These are my feels exactly. I had a great bunch of online friends that got me through times when I was all alone IRL. Then we all broke up but I kept in touch with one of them, but it was fine because I had found three friends IRL. Then high school ended, everyone else "moved on" and my last online friend left me too. I'd see my high school friends during breaks but they were different people and they just reminded me of what a failure I had become. I'm 100% alone now. 4chan is my only social interaction. I just want to turn back time

>>36880685
I dunno about reaching super human zen.
But that feel does sound familiar.
It's pretty comfy as long as you keep your head clear of doubts.

>>36875435
>>inability to move on from the past
>>all I do is reminisce about old friend groups I magically found
>>think over situations and wonder what would have happened if I had done x instead of x
>>look at their profiles and remember all the fun things we did
Damn...are you sure we arent twins because I cant even handle this.

>>36876148
Well then dont cheat because of someone like you I lost feelings for...that person.
You literally ruined those two and you by doing this.
>>36876317
>Nothing can take away the good times that you did have.
You need to go out and make some experience but the good ones.
>>36876442
Wanna talk about it champ?
>>36876447
I do this because it hurts.
I love you but I hate you all the same.

>depressed as child
>one friend finally saves me
>literally best bros
>spent 2+ weekends at his home every month for almost 7 years
>other friend takes him away from me after this time
>he gets a gf and spends even less time hanging out with me
>try to hang out with him in an attempt to keep our friendship
>always says hes busy and instead find evidence hes with gf or other friend
>tfw all my childhood memories are with him
I cant think about my youth now without getting furious. We were like brothers and he was the only one I could talk to. At least im getting /fit/ while he stayed a skelly so if I ever see him again ill beat the shit out of him.

>>36875435
>1+ year ago
Lucky you. Get over it before it becomes 4+ years.