What is a relationship actually like? What's the biggest

The biggest misconception is that there is some trick to getting one or that "game" is a thing. How easily you get one is tied directly to your attractiveness but for the most part it is entirely luck. Personality doesn't matter at all (since there is a woman for every type of personality but not every type of body)

It's like playing the lottery. You put in time and money into it and sometimes you get something, a lot of times you lose. Eventually you'll get to the point where you say fuck it and you invest all your money into lottery tickets hoping to win but you'll probably lose everything

>>36809578
I got into a relationship once for only like a month or less so can't say much.

It was fun. For me it was like having a best friend you're attracted to at the same time and you kiss and cuddle among other things. Getting into it was pretty easy, just happened somehow.

It was really nice, we didn't have time to get to know each other better or to ever have an argument though.

>>36809667
>it was like having a best friend you're attracted to at the same time and you kiss and cuddle among other things
This has been my experience, as well. Your heart will race when you see them for the first few months or so, and then that passion will be replaced with a wonderful sense of comfort whenever you're together.

That you can win some woman and you will just 'have' her and that there will be any sort of trustworthy permanence about that.
It is a never ending fight, keeping yourself in her top spot and its slowly wearing you down.
You ever felt like you wear a mask all your time outside, and glad when you get home to your cave and can drop it with a sigh?
In a relationship you'll end up wearing another one at home too, with no reprieve. Because few, if any women will continue to desire you if you dare to really just 'bee ourself'.

>>36809625
Yeah there are a lot of misconceptions about how people actually get into relationships among people who have never had one. And the same with sex. So there's a lot of discussion of theory and shit. "Oh, it's all about LMS," "You just gotta learn game," "Just lift and you'll be more confident," etc.

The more honest advice will tell you that it's a numbers game and the more you can put yourself out there the more likely you are to get what you want. But you can't think about a relationship like it's a spreadsheet or a math formula, and that's what people do when trying to advise desperate men.

>>36809578
I think /r9k/ swings wildly back and forth between a sort of disneyfied idealization of perfect harmony and then when they fail to find that a sort of angry oppositional redpill view of relationships where everything is about looks and your partner's trying to screw you over at every moment.
in truth it's neither; it's somewhere in-between. you both truly love and care for each other, but at the same time you're flawed human beings, and it's human nature to try and get away with making as few personal sacrifices as possible. when you find someone compatible enough that those two goals are pretty closely aligned, it's the best feeling in the world, and like the above anon said, it's a best friend that you also get to do lewd things with. you start to lose your sense of yourself as an independent unit: life ceases to be imaginable without that person.
the biggest problem though, is that the person you have in your head is never the person who really exists. either because you're idealizing your partner, or because you're both inevitably changing in what you want and who you are. the primary challenge to a successful relationship is to keep updating that mental model to be similar to reality and to keep loving that person even as it (and you) changes
overall though it's worth it. don't take the negativity here as genuine life advice rather than frustrated dudes blowing off steam. it'll break you and ruin your chance at happiness