>"hey buddy, I got a flattie in back, could you give

>>36748512
"A-actually, I have somewhere I need to be. I'm r-really sorry. Hope you find someone to h-h-h-help."

I was only pretending to be awkward. Dumb bitch.

>>36748512
You want me to fuck you up the butt? Ok but bear with me, I've never done this before and we're gonna have to go dry.

I saw a girl jogging my way yesterday and just ran off into the forest. I hate seeing other people when I go into the woods

>>36748632
imagine seeing a quasimodo sprint into the woods

>>36748615
>tfw you're actually a bear and you just made a joke

>>36748512
*pulls out handpump I carry on every ride*
Hmm by the looks of things that's a schrader valve, luckily my pump does both! But I didn't bring my tyre levers so if it's a puncture there's not a lot we can do I'm afraid.

>>36748512
>dress like a whore
>talks with sexual innuendos
>blonde

Into the trash she goes

>>36748512
I think I could spare more than just one quick pump

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>>36748632
>girls are visibly frightened by me when we come across innawoods
>dogs freak out, almost had to fight a German Shepherd with a pocket knife
I don't look that creepy, do I?

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>>36748512
which hole baby gurl?

>>36748512
BRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAPPPPPPP

desudesu

>>36748512
>I don't have a pump.

>>36748512
Hmm. Your back wheel seems to be in tip top shape. Good by!

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>Used to walk innawoods for hours at a time (max 4).
>Never really see or hear anything strange.
>Decide to go on /x/ and read some spooky stuff since a love of creepy/ghost stories runs in the family
>Find out about all the fucked up shit people make stories about
>Now I wont even let the house get out of my sight and I accompany my little brother whenever I visit and he wants to go in the woods
>Start packing a gun with me as well
>If I smell the scent that the stories describe I unholster my gun and gtfo

>>36749481
>smell the scent that the stories describe

my taco bell farts?

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>>36748512
>that kick stand
>those pedals
>those reflectors in the spokes
>on a moutain bike
>in the woods


Yeah na normie, your fault. I would just go "s-sorry i don't speak english" and be on my way.