Do you ever worry that you're crazy? I worry that some

People who are insane don't "Realize" they're insane. That is the point, boy.

nothing is ever really nonsense
you just don't know the convergence of atoms that brought about the "jumble" of words

observe:
combustible chafing unlimited sam product
invested courage pulmonary porous lettuce
entranced lotion simplification tragedy proposal
eliminates fastidious regents financially quell
propellant diminishes koala markets orange

not even i know exactly why those pile of words now exists in this thread
if i did, i might be something closer to a god that knows all
but the all-knowledge couldn't be communicated with words, you see, it could only be recreated by reenacting the entire universe from scratch

I have black outs regularly and come to having done something retarded like putting the phone in the fridge so I pretty much already am

I take anti-phychotics but I don't know if I'm really crazy or not

I'm scared that I actually am crazy so I keep taking them.

>>36557251
Nugh uh.
Dum

>>36557361
What is sanity even

This is a horrifying existence we have

Am I trapped in an absurd philosophical nightmare whose true deepest nature is obscured from me, or am I just a little bit off?

I see moments where everyone else gives off the vibe that they know something is off too. But am I just projecting? Am I just affecting them?

The deep personal moments when nobody is watching and we're free to laugh at whatever we want, to think whatever comes to mind unabashedly, without hesitation or defensive planning for future repercussions of the words

People always just take things the wrong way. Why do I have no friends?

When the beelzebubs seal was been untied any enemies was been destroying at minute

how the fuck is this an unoriginal comment?

>>36557600
I don't know what you mean by saying "Something is off"

>>36557781
By "something is off" I just mean pseudointellectual /r/iamverysmart/ level anti consumerist and propaganda based themes, but the real non-pseudo-intellectual thing, but whatever the epitome of that is. Does that make sense?

>>36557138
If you know it makes sense to you, and are aware it shouldn't, means that you can pretend it does not make sense to you. In the end sanity is simply keeping up the facade that you perceive the world the same as other humans. We all make sense of things that make sense to no one else, it's about how many of these things you can hide before they start spilling over.

>>36557847
Does everyone have weird moments where they think "Hmmm, am I the only one to which this strange mental anomaly I just experienced applies?", with those "strange mental anomalies" being generic brain farts, forgetting things, being aware of the fact that you just forgot something, wondering whether other people are aware of awkward social dynamics in a group setting, extreme self consciousness, etc.?

Or am I just fucking mentally ill

>>36557830
It seems like it makes sense to you but it doesn't make sense to me. Maybe if you elaborated further we could be on the same page.

But I think I know what you mean, maybe. Like how everything is a brand, how super big corporations are everywhere and we live in this big brother like society? Is that it?
I wish I knew whether I was crazy or not, I worry that these meds effect my health.

>>36557921
I don't think you're mentally ill, but I could be wrong. It's not like you're hearing voices or anything.

>>36557138
You're not insane if you do crazy shit and are aware of it. You are insane when you are no longer aware of it being crazy.

>>36557830
You mean the fact that you need to consume nothingness in order to be something?
There is a reason we are all sinners, because at a base level everything must consume something in order to be. Consumption in and of itself is the death of something caused by something else, and that is sin, you must sin in order to be. It is for a reason that most of these questions that you ask are inconceivable to you, let alone definable in words. It is because you know the answer to them, and that answer frightens you so much that the very essence of your being willed itself into a manifestation that is not even capable of approaching these questions. You wish to answer the conundrum failing to realize that if you ever answered it you would seize to exist. The closer you are to knowing everything the closer you are to knowing nothing, so stop trying to stare at god.

>>36557921
It just sounds like you're socially awkward and you've not been fortunate enough to encounter/perceive that other people have the same problems sometimes like memory problems, social anxiety, and self-consciousness. I would recommend you google and keep seeking answers for these specific problems, and seeing a psychologist if it's serious and you need some structured and educated help.

Insanity is subjective but as long as you can find a way to not be bothered by it then it's not really a big deal. I consider pretty much everyone except for myself to be a bit insane, but I recognize that for all social purposes I shouldn't really concern myself with that. The best I can do is hope things get better over time. I also know that me being insane is more likely from a naive and objective point of view so I basically just try to be rigorous with my mind in throwing away insane thinking.

>>36557921
And here I thought you actually knew what level of being off in the head I was referring to. You're just experiencing social anxiety due to being uncomfy in your skin, that's like 90% of the population withing your age group if I'm correct about you being a young adult. I'm talking about someone looking like someone else after you knowing them for years, and you pretending like they've looked like that since always, even though your memories tell you different, because if you did they'll give you shock therapy.

>>36558113
>You wish to answer the conundrum failing to realize that if you ever answered it you would seize to exist. The closer you are to knowing everything the closer you are to knowing nothing, so stop trying to stare at god.
that's some bullshit right there. the rest isn't bad I think though.

I think the buddhist perspective offers something similar to original sin, the four noble truths, which basically say that life is suffering and that in order to reduce suffering we must disconnect from our cravings and desires if we wish to end suffering.
I don't really know how I feel about this position but in cases of extreme suffering it certainly is helpful to take a step back through well-established methods like meditation and try to see things unemotionally/disconnected in order to have a wider and better perspective.

>>36558062
what if you are aware of it hours after?

>>36558247
Damn dude thanks I feel better kind of now. I'm in my early 20s

I'm scared to get old and have my memory legitimately start getting bad. My greatest fear is getting alzheimer's - my grandma has it. It looks like a perpetual bad acid trip. I'd want to be euthanized if I got it.

>>36558247
>>36558113
>>36557275

Oh boy, it's one of these threads that brings out the actual crazies that lurk here.

>>36558322
Smoke some weed until you learn that poor memory can be nice.

jk but it could work

>>36558276
Someday that bullshit will make more sense to you than the rest of the post. And you will understand just how much more I am trying to tell you, but there are no words.

>>36558443
>The closer you are to knowing everything the closer you are to knowing nothing
this bit is literally just a contradiction, so unless you meant
>The closer you are to knowing everything, the closer you are to knowing that you know nothing
then you're retarded :)

>>36558443
>>36558461
also although words can limit our ideas, our brains are very limiting as well, so you'd do well to realize that thinking in terms that literally nobody else can understand (because you can't articulate them) is liable to a great amount of error due to being all in your head rather than in multiple heads and on paper/computers.

>>36558322
But consider this, even without Alzheimer's your memory would have faded completely with your death. And that's for a good reason too, you should be just as afraid of your ability to remember as you are of your ability to forget. You should also be thankful for both. For now you are the way you are, enjoy it, stop worrying about what you will become, you will become nothing eventually so stop worrying so much.

I mean, I have terrible brain fog and derealization so I guess I am,kind of crazy. I always feel like I'm dreaming. Nothing seems like it's really happening, even though I know it is. My consciousness and memories are all so murky

>>36558062
The first quite often leads into the second.

>>36558461
Then consider me retarded my good friend, because I didn't write it wrong the first time, it being a contradiction is part of the point.

>>36558509
Just as liable as the collective being wrong. If something can be right or wrong then it will be both, and it will be neither and everything in between all at once.

>>36558699
Your ideas will never spread if you don't find a way to articulate them better. Or if there's some other method by which people will figure out what you're saying, could you articulate that?

>>36558699
You scare me. All of your posts make me feel so uncomfortable.

>>36558774
I agree. This thread makes me feel insane.

>>36558740
I don't even share all of the things I can put into words. To be honest about the things I cannot put into words, sometimes I regret sharing them with myself.

>>36558774
Not him but why does insanity (or whatever you're seeing in him) make you uncomfortable?

>>36558835
How much do you trust your own mind?

>>36558852
Not that much, knowing that schizophrenia and mental illness is actually a thing.

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>>36557138
>I worry that some day I'll accidentally read a page of random nonsense words and have it make sense to me, and then I'll know...
how will you know its nonsense words if it makes sense to you you stupid fuck

>>36559005
because you can usually tell what is nonsense and what isn't. like for example I can tell an album is good or bad objectively despite if I like it or not. Stop acting like a dense child

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>>36559061
> I can tell an album is good or bad objectively despite if I like it or not

I'm a little concerned. I got some really bad news a while back. After I hung up I cried for a few minutes, then laughed really hard at how shitty this past 2 years have been. I feel as though I am on the verge of losing it.

>>36559108
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5U-erMq7OEU
You can do it anon. I believe in the you that believes in yourself.

>>36558836
It's the fact that I don't know what I'm seeing in him, not at all.

>>36559108
wanna talk about it buddy
huelva weert

>>36559170
If you're curious about what insanity is like you could take some drugs, especially psychadelics. Or do some research on mentally ill people. It's not incomprehensible, just have to learn about it because society generally shoves it under the table.

>>36558852
Completely.

I also don't know why the other gentleman thought he should answer in my stead.

>>36559151

I rarely ever post in my 8 or so years lurking different boards here. Pretty sure the number of times I've posted is in the single digits. I got a legitimate laugh out of that as well as a morale boost. Thank you

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>>36559061
>because you can usually tell what is nonsense and what isn't.
yea when youre sane you moron, you lose that ability when you become insane thats the whole fucking point.

>insane people are aware of their insanity
yea exactly thats why theyre insane
fuck you are so fucking stupid

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>>36559246
this right here is the definition of insanity. completely trusting your own mind. lol

>>36559287
:D

>>36559215
Insanity isn't incomprehensible to me, I get it just fine. it's just he isn't insane, this guy could be your fucking neighbor who mows his lawn and shit, you can tell he has his shit together.

>>36559313
And yet he carried a conversation better than most others in this thread, makes you go hmm doesn't it...

I had an ex-gf who had schizophrenia. Sometimes she had episodes where she'd hallucinate and hear voices in her head. When that kind of thing happened, she knew something wasn't right but it didn't make the hallucinations stop.

>>36558774
>>36558829
It's because that motherfucker tries to simplify things to the extreme so much that he makes them extremely complicated. Just making sense of his sentences puts your subconscious on his side logic wise, since he is trying to make a point about the notion of things becoming what they are not, when they try to be more of what they are.
You have to literally not understand what he is trying to tell you, in order to ever actually disprove what he is trying to convince you of. In short, this motherfucker is scary, because he either put in the effort to construct his shit like that on an image board, or his shit comes out of his mouth like that casually without him having to put effort into it, both possibilities are creepy as fuck in my opinion.
And the funny thing is, OP made a thread about being afraid of going crazy, and this guy shows up, making OP read some pretty "crazy" shit with his mind's voice. Even if OP forgets this whole day, his subconsciousness will always remember that train of logic these posts lead him down, and the motherfucker knew without a doubt that would happen when he wrote those posts.

>>36559374
>You have to literally not understand what he is trying to tell you, in order to ever actually disprove what he is trying to convince you of.
autism.
fuck off with your lame tsao te ching meme philosophy. its stupid and meaningless.

>>36559316
Yeah I suppose it's a little scary if you think of it like that. The world is pretty clearly being run by psychopaths though so the fact that there are insane people everywhere doesn't surprise me.
>>36559352
Insane people can be really good at social interaction. It's a skill that anyone can learn. In fact I'm pretty sure that it's decently common in successful people. Some serial killers are extremely charismatic.

>>36559374
It's probably our resident CIA watchdog having some fun. Actually fucking with people here isn't that hard, most kids on here are already mush when it comes to strength of mind and whatnot.

>>36559477
>so the fact that there are insane people everywhere doesn't surprise me
nope senpai not insane people just really really stupid ones exercising their edge trying to show how creepy spooky and unique they are. the worst part is everyone is buying it

>>36559462
I ain't even that guy, but you didn't disprove his point just by name calling him and asking him to go away.

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>>36559542
I agree but I'm still pretty sure that pretty much everyone is a bit insane and there are plenty of truly insane people all over the place.
I say that everyone is a bit insane because I haven't met hardly anyone that wishes to suspend their subjective perspective in favor of seeing things as objectively as possible. Not like it's possible to be objective, but it seems to me that the fundamental behavior of "I have an opinion, so I have to defend it as my own" is just flawed. We should be our own critics as much as the critics of other people. Many people acknowledge this flaw in humanity but precious few actually try to relieve themselves of it.
Sorry for going off on a bit of a tangent, this is something I'm a bit passionate about.

>>36559542
Dude, this isn't a physical act where you ask for a time stamp, this guy did actually think these things, and write them down in a post, and these things are crazy, weather he did it to be edgy or not doesn't matter, his brain is still capable of going further down the crazy line than mine is at least.

>>36559696
The universe is much scarier than some random anon spouting some nonsense, I suggest you develop some tolerance.

>>36559503
>hey Barry come check this shit out
>you remember that thought seed thing they taught us a few years back
>I did it to one of these pepe fellas
>hahaha oh those silly pepe fellas

Anyone else go sometimes when before going to bed they get a feeling like their mind has left and reality will break down around them and they won't be able to see reality anymore? I feel like I will start seeing weird images and creatures around me because its like I have decided to stop looking at reality?

>>36559624
>but you didn't disprove his point
lol you were just memeing about how his point is inexplicable
fucking kys asap
>>36559641
>pretty much everyone is a bit insane
lol whatever that means. depends what you define as "insanity"
>objectively as possible
whatever you define as objective
even so those irrational feelings have an evolutionary purpose
>"I have an opinion, so I have to defend it as my own" is just flawed.
what do you mean. this doesnt make a whole lot of sense
>>36559819
sorry senpai, but youre just retarded

>>36559723
Duh the universe is scarier because everything is possible, including a random anon spouting nonsense. I only wrote the previous reply not the one you originally replied to, so I never said he scared me, just that he was crazy.

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>>36559859
>Duh the universe is scarier because everything is possible,
thats why the universe has fundamental laws
because everything is possible

>>36559849
>lol you were just memeing about how his point is inexplicable

I'm not either of them though, not the first crazy guy or the guy that tried to build a theory on why the crazy guy was saying crazy shit. I just thought your reply was a bit shallow considering; he was trying to say that that guy's point is explicable, and in explaining it to yourself you somewhat proved it to yourself. Im not saying he was right. I'm just saying you didn't provide an argument to disprove him, you just said he was wrong and name called him.

>>36559819
That's just what happens when you start to fall asleep, I know exactly what you mean

You start kind of dreaming but also not, and in those moments when you "wake up" from being kind of almost asleep and become aware for a second, you still have a split second of half-dreaming thoughts.

>>36559819
Sensory deprivation is effective stimulation of the imagination.

>>36559849
Well sanity is defined as
>the ability to think and behave in a normal and rational manner; sound mental health.
from google so I'm trying to use that definition. Insanity means thinking and/or behaving irrationally and/or abnormally.
Objective is defined as
>not influenced by personal feelings or opinions in considering and representing facts.
also from google.
>>"I have an opinion, so I have to defend it as my own" is just flawed.
>what do you mean. this doesn't make a whole lot of sense
I mean the thought pattern which we naturally follow where we consider things according to a single perspective attached to ourselves is a pattern which is inherently flawed. One perspective can never be a complete picture of something. I guess this is a philosophical position but I believe that perception simply cannot be trusted because it is subjective (subject to our various biases). There is not such thing as an objective source of information but science is built around the idea that data collection and peer review can create significantly more solid (unchanging and widely applicable) information. There are limitations to science still of course.
But the core idea that I'm trying to get across is that we cannot give absolute trust to our senses/perceptions/thoughts, and consequently we cannot give absolute trust to anything. Because of this, we must constantly be open to the idea that we could have literally everything "wrong" in some way.

>>36559859
oh

>>36557251
So what does it mean when I realize I'm insane?

>>36560004
forgot to add that insanity can also mean unsound mental health according to that definition of sanity.

>>36559996
>Update
>>36560004
Okay, one thing I also had happen was one time when I woke up after a dream I was definitely awake but I saw a door on my cceiling and it stayed there for a while but eventually it just kind of faded away.. Was that normal? There was another time something like that happened but it was a person standing by my bedroom door, that one disappeared much faster.

>>36560004
>But the core idea that I'm trying to get across is that we cannot give absolute trust to our senses/perceptions/thoughts, and consequently we cannot give absolute trust to anything. Because of this, we must constantly be open to the idea that we could have literally everything "wrong" in some way.
good fucking job you nigger, entry level philosophy class 101
give the fuck up on life I sincerely hope youre under 16
>>36559947
>he was trying to say that that guy's point is explicabl
haha
no, he wasnt.
>>36559947
>I'm just saying you didn't provide an argument to disprove him
because he didnt make one, he simply stated an unsupported claim
>name called him.
rightly so for retards, they need to know their place

>>36560116
I mean do you have anything else to say other than saying that what I said is in phil 101? I don't know what I'm supposed to gain from that. You're just insulting me

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>>36557138
>inb4 lol you were just on psychedelics

I've taken acid once and it was at that time that I knew that I was/am really close to some form of crazy. Like I was walking along and all of a sudden someone lifted the blankets from the ground to reveal the yawning precipice just inches away.

On the come-up, i started to sense that people were watching me, could hear me breathe, were recording me maybe, even though i was with a friend (who also took some) in his room, i had bought a bag of airheads earlier and there was a picture of a face on it, and i got this sense that the eyes on that face were watching me. it wasn't just fear, i understood in some sick sense that i really was being watched, that everyone was out to get me, such thoughts made sense to the extent that i just knew it to be true, it was paranoia and it was beyond believing because i could feel myself being convinced.

if my friend wasn't there, i think i would've crawled into a corner or closet and scribbled in my notebook the entire time about how everyone was listening in on me and how i was a waste of life and space and how exactly in insane detail people were watching me and out to get me. and the worst part was that if that happened, i would not have come back from that trip sane, because there wouldn't be doubt in my mind that such paranoia were real.

i still feel those thoughts sometimes, sometimes more and sometimes less. instances like >>36559819 happen in the daytime and those moments are filled with fear, where i feel my thoughts are only barely in control. i've been getting more and more afraid of seeing things, like shadow people when you've taken too much amphetamines. i get scared looking into my reflections.

if i took too much benedryl or something, i think i'd be gone for good. thank god the barrier is drawn back up. yeah i have brain problems but the creeping feeling of impending psychosis was never made so clear to me before.

>>36560140
its a lot more than what youre saying. you deserve to be insulted for spouting such crap. did you get linked here from reddit or something.
>things may not be as they seem
woah dude like so trippy

i mean theres really not much to what you said. its like explaining very entry level stuff

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Lately I've been worried I'm turning into a sociopath. I'm finding it harder and harder to interact with people beyond them providing me a service and I feel like one of these days I'll snap and lose my shit on everyone before going home drinking and laughing like a maniac rolling around on my floor.

It's very concerning to me although I don't know if this is what op is talking about

>>36560188
You deserve to be insulted for adding nothing to this discussion.

>>36560197

Being a sociopath sounds like paradise though.

>>36560223
I doubt a full on sociopath is fun if you are conscious about how disconnected you are from society.

Maybe some people here enjoy it but I can't. The worst part about this all is that I have a strong desire to be social but I am so fucking awful that I fudge all my extended social situations and I already am seen as "that guy". I think that's what is really killing my mental health

>>36560197
I wish i was a sociopath. I dont want to care about anybody other than myself, I don't feel others are worth my time being sad about but unfortunately im a very sympathetic person.

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>>36557138
I'm beginning to think that technology literally is magic, that electrons are infernal spirits, and circuits are the sigils we use to sumon and control them, that we have been conned by Satan into creating a world of ubiquitous witchcraft without even realizing it, that the internet is globe spanning ritual of unprecedented scale to summon enough vile energy to allow Google to birth the AI:Antichrist and these are the end times, and the part that worries is me most is the prospect that I might NOT be crazy.

>>36560221
>You deserve to be insulted for adding nothing to this discussion.
>states the most basic well known tenant of philosophy
>YOU ADDED NOTHING
k
the sky is blue btw in case you were wondering
you are a very stupid person and I feel sorry for you

>>36557138
I'm usually seriously concerned that I'll just snap one day, like I just feel like I'm a sociopath and that some day I'll just decide fuck it...

>>36560081
Can anyone explain this? I'm scared.

>>36560163
Holy shit I know what you mean

Luckily I never took too much acid, but I feel like I can almost just imagine what you mean about someone lifting the blanket and you perceiving a yawning precipice

Like you would fall into the void, like that feeling where you -almost- trip but don't quite trip, and you get an electric shock through your whole body - except an existential one like you're avoid to fall into some void area. And it would feel real

Now I'm talking nonsense, but lol, fuck psychs

>>36560163
lol you were just on psychadelics

I've taken a lot of shrooms over the past several months (never really higher than an eighth though, I'm a pussy) and all I do is sit in my room feeling over-analytical about everything. Can be fun or absolutely miserable.

>>36560383
Christ you are fucking awful person. You're literally just replying out of rage. Instead of realizing that you might know something that I don't and you could enlighten me and add to the discussion you just make fun of me. What do you think is the result of that? Everyone else thinks you're a cunt and you've done nothing helpful for anyone. Just leave if that's all you want to do.

>>36560372
The thing is, ideas like this make a "kind" of sense. They don't make sense, they aren't rational, they aren't verifiable, but you understand what they're talking about. I understand what you're saying exactly

I simply say to you, that there is nothing wrong with thoughts like these as long as you don't lose sleep at night over them. Everyone thinks some weird shit. Legitimate philosophers have been known to think some weird shit

I don't know

>>36560383
and if you really think all I did was state the simple fact that reality is subjective, then you didn't read everything I said.
>We should be our own critics as much as the critics of other people. Many people acknowledge this flaw in humanity but precious few actually try to relieve themselves of it.
there's something it seems like you missed.

>>36560478
>you understand what they're talking about
in the sense that they make basic grammatical sense but not rational?

>>36560440
>Everyone else thinks you're a cunt and you've done nothing helpful for anyone.
oh no! I blunted babies first edge! so sorry anon!
>>36560535
>then you didn't read everything I said.
the master of dialects graces me with his wisdom again
>there's something it seems like you missed.
>we should be critical of ourselves
a. true. fucking. genius.
its rare that i get to meet such a like minded connoisseur of philosophy. you must also read the inspirational quotes blog on tumblr

>>36560648
In the sense that there's no way we can disprove that from being the case, and it's possible to understand metaphorically and philosophically as a concept or hypothesis. Not in a literal way as in "I see what you're saying holy fuck it's true" but more "I see what you're saying and I can't disprove that because it's an unfalsifiable proposition", but keep in mind there are infinitely many of those of all sorts

>>36560705
>unfalsifiable proposition
how do you know its "unfalsifiable"

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>>36560440
my point wasn't what i was like on psychedelics, it's how i thought afterwards and what i am like now. the trip itself was like a trigger that didn't fully catch because my friend was there and blah blah blah. i guess i really didn't emphasize that.

in the back of my mind, i am now aware that i have these paranoid thoughts that i know i sort of believe, and under duress i think i would believe them completely. legitimately believe that you are being recorded, being watched, and there are people out to get you, and legitimately think they make a lot of sense.

i feel that i am losing control of how i perceive reality. i feel more and more compelled to see strange images or apparitions. i was running on a treadmill in the evening the other day, and i had to stop, i was getting freaked out by some amorphous spectre-like scariness, i couldn't stop being afraid of it appearing, and i literally had to force myself to imagine a cute anime girl to get rid of that thought. i then took a shower but i was so afraid of blinking because i wasn't sure what i would see when i opened them. if i imagine something scary, i am afraid that i can't even control whether i'm imagining it or not. do you know what you feel like after taking too much adderall and you see shit in the corners of your eyes and paranoid? but now you're sober.

there are other things too, like the idea/thought/feeling that things make too much sense (synchronicity). but that doesn't bother me. honestly, what gets me is the fear and paranoia, emotional malaise and quite honestly an impending sense of doom. if this stuff were purely philosophical then i wouldn't give as much of a shit.

>>36560433
it was 1 tab of acid, my first and only time. not strong at all.

i can't take acid again. any psych is too much for me because unless i am happy and positive there's no way it wouldn't push me over the edge. i can almost guarantee that i will utterly lose my grip on reality and i will not return to earth.

>>36560784
>there are other things too, like the idea/thought/feeling that things make too much sense (synchronicity). but that doesn't bother me. honestly, what gets me is the fear and paranoia, emotional malaise and quite honestly an impending sense of doom. if this stuff were purely philosophical then i wouldn't give as much of a shit.
yes anon! youre truly the specialest of edges!

>>36557138
This happened to me
I wasn't feeling good and this made it worse

>>36560676
dude cmon I'm just trying to be reasonable and rational. can't you see that? what's your problem?

>>36560784
Anon this feels like you've experienced minor PTSD and have developed a generalized anxiety disorder

It feels really specific and LSD-ish even because bad trips are literally just over-extended anxiety attacks coupled with quasi-schizophrenic loose associations

I'm not going to say "it's just in your head" but I will say something similar because it matters - this isn't anything to do with acid, it's a general mental issue which you developed because of a traumatic experience and it can be treated the same way anyone's generalized anxiety can be.

So if there's any shit like "Dude that LSD, fuck" in your mind, realize it's just anxiety.

Don't know if i'm reassuring you on something you don't care about, but I know I had thoughts like, "fuck is this something more...?", no it's just anxiety. Don't worry

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>>36560842
fear makes me afraid, don't know what you want me to say. it's fear from seeing apparitions and paranoia of others watching/out to get me. i just wanted to clarify that this isn't "oho look at me i just discovered solipsism."

>>36560929
my concern is that i already had pre-existing anxiety/depression and a stint in a mental hospital before i took acid (which was about 2 or 3 years ago). i've had shittiness with anxiety before but it's not tinged with this flavor of fear. those aforementioned instances, it really doesn't feel like anxiety, it's more like a hyperreal horror movie.

overall it wasn't even a bad trip, the bad moment lasted probably all of 5 minutes. i don't ever think 'dude that lsd, fuck', i think 'dude i gotta keep it together.' i don't blame lsd or even think of it when i get stressed. none of what i felt/thought while tripping felt foreign to me, and honestly i think any psychedelic could have done this.

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>>36561145
I've had some crazy hallucinations too anon, my first couple trips I kept seeing miniature crowds of people forming out of dust and they would keep walking towards each other into piles.
Then late at night I could swear I saw humanoid beast like silhouettes lounging at me from the shadows as I went to piss,
as well as a pale woman standing on my kitchen counter.
I usually just laugh it off and say bring it on half sincerely, but it can truly make my imagination come to life.

I just worry that I'm so autistic I actually say what I hear in my head without knowing it and everyone's too polite to ask wtf is wrong with me.

>>36561400
Lmao anon I have this same worry

Like, "fuck did I just say that and forgot that I said it...?"

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>be schizoaffective
>like schizophrenia and bipolar/depression
>never know if I'm making huge mistakes in life because I could be going through a manic high
>have visual and aural hallucinations that make me wanna kms or hurt other people
>always aware that I am broken and nobody wants me
>parents still think I'm bound for success
>it's all just an elaborate ruse
>am going through critically massive depression now
>yesterday I had a vision that I'll grow up to be an Irish Catholic fat dad that lives in the south that plays guitar in a bluegrass band
>this made me incredibly underwhelmed at life

>>36561553
>>yesterday I had a vision that I'll grow up to be an Irish Catholic fat dad that lives in the south that plays guitar in a bluegrass band
>>this made me incredibly underwhelmed at life

Sorry anon but I laughed way too hard at your post, lmfao

Let me just tell you though that even people without any mental disorders are really underwhelmed at life. That I can say truly

i cant poop without medication because im afraid im sending the tactile sensations and the feeling of disgust that im doing just that to friends and family.
also unironically a nevernude, because if i see myself nude i have "pictures" of it and i'll telepathically unwillingly share it
ama

Crazy people don't sit down wandering if they're nuts

>>36557138
>yfw you realize they never were random nonsense words and you only saw them that way because they didn't fit in with your interpretive schematic

Lol that's like saying everyone who speaks french is speaking nonsense because you don't understand it.

>>36557921
Those happen to most people I think. Remember that we are locked in perpetual "I have no mouth and I must scream" mode. What you see in others is a greatly silenced version of what they really are.