So I'm long past the 'cant get out of bed' stage

Start smoking weed, assuming you can access any

>>36440185

I cant smoke weed. It gives me huge anxiety and brings out my worst fears

>>36440148
No, probably not. You can try pharma anti depressants if you want.

I've been depressed for 17 years, 15 of which are in the complete anhedonia no emotions at all no even crying mode.

It's not really that bad. You could feel BAD all of the time. It's better to feel nothing at all.

Embrace it. Make your life about making OTHER people happy. Be fulfilled that you helped other people where you could not help yourself.

Contribute to society. Contribute to your family.

Realize that your happiness doesn't matter.

Do you take medication? As prescribed?

Drink? Drugs?

Try xanax or klonopin but never regularly and never mix it with alcohol, the anti-anxiety effects often have a side effect of euphoria

>>36440281

I have the good sense to know that my life will never be what it could of been. You NEED happiness to drive you. Not even just happiness. A functioning range of emotions. Its what makes life worth living. Its what makes you say 'I want to go out tonight!' Or 'I'm going to try for a promotion!' Or talk to a girl, anything. I am just existing.

>>36440357
No. I drink very rarely, just to remind myself briefly what happiness even is. I cant do drugs. I just get anxious and the comedown is brutal, lasting weeks. (Eg mdma)
Havent done drugs in over 2 years

>>36440148
Maybe you need a spark, a muse. Probably has to do with your job and it lacking fulfillment. I say this because you described your story as if your social life is fine. If its not fine(be honest with yourself) then you need to make steps to improve it. Truth be told life can be as exciting or as menial as you make it. Pick up a new hobby, remove old bad habits, volunteer for a cause you care deeply about. Don't look to drugs or alcohol unless you want to chase a high for the rest of your life.

Hell, if you have money, a simple vacation out of country can rest your mental state and coming back to home is fresh and exciting again.

>>36440148
Join the army man


You'll be so stressed, hungry and in pain you can't be depressed.

>>36440357
Go to a doctor somehow. Antidepressants work. And they may have shit side effects but deal with it. Nothing is perfect.

Might not go away but it can get better.

Alcohol is a downer. And will always suck more than it will benefit

um... did you try being yourself? stop thinking so much.

>>36440447
>

I have the good sense to know that my life will never be what it could of been. You NEED happiness to drive you. Not even just happiness. A functioning range of emotions. Its what makes life worth living. Its what makes you say 'I want to go out tonight!' Or 'I'm going to try for a promotion!' Or talk to a girl, anything. I am just existing.

You don't need happiness to drive you at all. I'm living proof. I have no emotions whatsoever anymore. I'm doing just fine. I volunteer all over my city, try my best to help my family, am a shoulder to cry on when people need that, try to make things as good as possible so other people can be happy.

I am existing, yes, but there's nothing wrong with that. There's no purpose in life. No reason to live, and more importantly no reason to die either. Existing is all we do all of the time, it's just that emotions abstract away from that base loop of all life: eat, work, shit, repeat.

Why does talking to a girl matter? I don't think you're really at the point you think you're at if you still have pinings for things like that.

>>36440281
"I'm starving"
"it's okay just feed other people make your life about feeding other people"

Yo try some adderall

>>36441064
Fuck off. Just because you suck at being human doesn't mean anon has to be selfish too. People like him are the ones that make life not complete shit.

>>36441101
You don't understand what I mean. That was a very simple analogy I don't see why it's difficult to understand for you.

Maybe you get affection and that's why you don't see it.

>>36441150
You're acting like it's necessary to have these things in your life. It's not necessary to feel love or to be happy or be angry or sad to live. All that is required to live is to eat and breathe and drink.

So find purpose in helping others find happiness where you could not. Stop being selfish and self centered.

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I'm the same as op but I don't have any friends (irl and online) or a gf or even a relationship with my family. At work, I know no one and no one knows me, even when I've been working for almost half a year now.

What's the usual outcome for those claiming life insurance for suicide? A-asking for a friend.

>>36441150
I do get affection, yes. But I do not deserve it. I'm human garbage. If we're 75% water, than I'm nothing but a walking puddle of water without hopes and dreams. Goddamn, I'm disgusted of myself.

>>36441205
>What's the usual outcome for those claiming life insurance for suicide? A-asking for a friend.
The policy I took out wouldn't cover suicide for the first 18 months.

3 months to go

Yeah, it does go away. I was in the same boat as you anon last month. However, when I made an effort to start contacting and hanging out with people, I started experiecing severe mood swings. Some days I felt extremely happy, and others I felt like the world was collapsing around me and happiness was unreachable. Eventually, these mood swings stopped, I stabilized, and now I'm alright. I'm not exactly ecstatic about everything, but I can feel happy about stuff again. I have become a normie. If you keep trying to socialize, then the same will likely happen for you. The hardest part is the mood swings though. Be careful anon.

>>36441176
Love is like energy. If you get none, you end up dying.

Mammals need at the very least to be touched. The emptyness I feel is not a matter of ego or self importance it's my mammal mind and physiology breaking down because I don't get my oxytocin fix. How can I feel human?

>helping
I voluntered in several associations. That's nice and all but not fulfilling. Other volunteers and staff have their lovers, their families. In the context of their lives, they have love to "spare". I'm not sure if I get my point across.

Don't lecture me on what is and is not a need. I'm a 28 years old khhv. Don't conflate affection and sex, I never implied that sex, or romantic love are necessary. But affection is.

Getting none leads to depression, for the very same reason that newborns die if they're never hugged. For the same reason that mammals are constantly grooming each other.

>>36441222
Not being socially and financially successful doesn't make you undeserving of love. Unless you're a bad person that hurts others in any way, you're fine.

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>>36441269
I gotta review mine again. Hm. Anyway, hope we'll last long enough. I'm just tired of existing.

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>>36440148
Please don't remind me what life is going to become.

>>36441346
>I'm just tired of existing.
Me too.

It actually felt like a relief when I got that insurance policy, I knew I wasn't going to have to live like this forever.

I feel better and better the closer it gets.
Having an actual date to wait for made everything a lot easier.

I'm 18 and rarely feel a hint of happiness and sometimes I feel a little bit of joy. What could i do, anons?

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>>36440148
Try to find something that interests you. A hobby, passion, a distraction. Life gets dull without these things. And plus, you are probably not the only one that has to 'fake' interactions. A lot of people ive known feel the same way. It's a side effect of our society.

i wish i could just get a job that way i could save up enough money to move out of this town that is sucking the life out of me but i fell for the NEET meme since dropping out of high school and now no job accessible to me wants to hire me so i just do the same shit i did in high school except with a lot of added anxiety about my future and no fun

>>36441309
>Unless you're a bad person that hurts others in any way, you're fine.
But I do. I cheat and lie and am almost completely egoistic. I just can't stop. I know if I don't help myself noone would do it for me. So I help myself at expense of others and even my longtern wellbeing. I'm like a cancer in society but I will continue existing even if others hate, even if I harm innocents. Because I want to live.

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>>36441411
Congratulations for making that far, anon. I hope we'll finally find peace.

>>36441309
No, you don't need affection. That's what I'm telling you. Come to terms with it.

You don't need affection to live. You need only to eat, drink, breathe, sleep. The way to peace is to devote yourself to other's happiness.

If you truly are at the point where you feel nothing, this shouldn't be hard to accept. But you're clearly bitter, or angry, or sad. Otherwise you wouldn't be posting this complaining about it.

Based on your responses I think you're delusional about not feeling anything. I think you in fact you still feel things. You may be experiencing Depersonalization or Derealization which is making it difficult or impossible for you to even know that you're feeling a certain way. This is a coping mechanism.

However, if you're truly feeling nothing you will eventually come around to my side. You may ask, why don't you kill yourself? Like I said I feel nothing. I feel neither sadness nor anger or happiness or joy. Suicide would be the implication that I place preference of death over life. And not killing myself would be the implication that I place preference of life over death. But I place no preference on either. There is no reason for me to die, and there is no reason for me to live.

I am, and that's all that is. So I work to help others to achieve what I can no longer -- happiness fleeting and impermanent.