>depressed during my formative years >now have literally

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>be depressed since 13
>Been close to suicide multiple times
>Have to act outwardly extroverted or normalfags start bothering me

It's funny when sometimes I get into conversations about suicide and someone says " I can't imagine why someone would do that". Just shows how disconnected people are from each other

>no memories of my formative years

>>36203315
Maybe you were depressed because you knew what you'd grow up to be?

>>36203451
that's a paradox and you know it bub

>>36203315
I feel basically the same way. In addition, my parents were big on the corporeal punishment.

In the words of Varg Vikernes

>Stop watching anime.

Could it be possible that you have suffered from shaken baby syndrome? That could cause inability to recall early memories and your current poor vision.

>>36203461
In what way is it a paradox? It'd just be a self-fulfilling prophecy. You were depressed because you knew you'd grow up to be a whiny sadsack beta due to being depressed as a child.

>>36203592
but if I was never depressed I wouldn't be like this

>>36203604
That's why it's a self-fulfilling prophecy.

>>36203734
no that doesn't make sense though

>>36203754
You don't need proof or a logical reason to believe that you are or will become something. As long as you believe for whatever reason (or lack thereof), it is possible for it to be a self-fulfilling prophecy.

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>>36203734
>someone has cancer
>does not get help or treatment
>cancer persists and they die
>hurrr durrr self fulfilling prophecy mane

Neck yourself immediately you fucking imbecile.

>>36203826
It'd be more like getting the flu from a flu vaccine (which can actually happen).

i kinda have this same problem

if i wasn't depressed idk what i would be doing, as retarded as that sounds

i feel like my depression is just my brain's natural reaction to being a hopeless loser