"Do you have a gf?" (how do I respond to this

>>35989625
Just chuckle.
They won't know what to think and they won't ask again.

>No, I am a pedophile.

>>35989625
It's a polite way of asking "are you a virgin"

"yes" or "i broke up with my ex" means you're not

"no" means you are

im honest and just answer "no"

tell them the truth and say no

>>35989625
playfully dodge the question like a normie and say
"what, are you interested in me?"

of course there are cases where you could still fuck this up if you're autistic enough.

>>35989625
Where do you work that coworkers ask you such questions?

>>35989625
Just say "no", dummy. If you pass yourself off as having a gf then girls will just figure you're taken. Just recite some bullshit hookup story from /soc/ or /fit/ if any of your coworkers start talking about the stacys they banged last week.

>>35989625
>"Yeah, here she is"
>*shows right hand*
>"She can be pretty aggressive sometimes so you should go away"

>>35989625
>Nah, I'm on a bit of a dry spell.
>Actually, do you think you could help set me up?
>I've been busy with my job/school/church/make some shit up so that you sound interesting and like you have hobbies, and so I haven't had much time to date
>It'd really help me out, with my being so busy and all
>Thanks, Chad/Stacey!
>Please let me know if I can help you with anything in the future!
>Maybe I could cover a shift for you sometime?

Godspeed, OP.

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>>35989698
>say "what, are you interested in me?"

what if he says "yes"

>I don't even have *a* friend

I've been saying this. Sometimes it gets a laugh

>>35989790
time for fuggg

"women aren't property"

>>35989724
Best advice ITT, but OP will somehow fuck it up.

>>35989724
>>Nah, I'm on a bit of a dry spell.

Now English is not my native language, but doesn't that basically mean 'haven't had sex in a while'? Would you seriously tell your coworkers that?

Nah, I'm too busy fucking your mom

>>35990065
not that guy, but I think it's more of an 'unlucky' thing rather than not having sex, although it's possible to think that way.

>>35989996
Thanks lol. I do hope it can at least help someone

>>35990065
Having a dry spell can mean you haven't had sex in a while, yeah, but I was more intending it to mean he just hadn't had a girlfriend or gone on a date in a while. Although, personally I feel like if they're asking OP about having a girlfriend, talking about sex is entirely reasonable (though it would of course depend on the job and the specific circumstances).

>>35989715
Are you what they call "Reddit"?

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>>35989835
but im not homo

>>35989625
burst into tears and rant about "that cheating whore" who "took your kids and all your stuff"
they'll never bring it up again

>im still waiting for the one hehe
>im just too focused on my career but if the right girl came along hehe
>i guess my standards are just ridiculously high hehe
>ive met a couple of women but it didnt go anywhere hehe

Lie. dont interact further, you will just fuck it up. be polite but not friendly. If they are asking, its to later destroy you, or at the least ridicule you behind your back. trust no one.

>do you have a gf?
>n-no
>why not?
>i guess i just haven't gotten around to it [actually im just incel]
>are you gay?
>no
>haha i was just joking man
>oh...

>>35991626
just close your eyes, it'll be over soon

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>>35989625
>"do you have a gf anon?"
>"no, but you could become mine"
>"anon I'm not gay"
>"I WANT TO LICK UR BOIPUSSY"
Best way to respond anon, trust me, worked all the time. They never ask again.

>>35989677
"Not right now, are you trying to ask me out?" is my answer.

>>35991958
That's pretty alpha tbqh

>>35991824
God I miss the poopoo peepee era