j-just had a hard talk with my bf. he said he refuses to marry

Unless you are infertile you should feel bad

>>35881465
Do you have a penis anon

>>35881486
I said I "can't", not I "won't".
dare I ask why I should feel bad if I could do it but didn't want to or felt too afraid to?

>>35881465
jesus fucking christ hitler was right

Why bother relying so much on a partner? A more equal relationship sounds better to me.

>>35881465
wives are for making babies

>>35881524

He just wants to know why you can't have kids. But yeah, children are kind of extremely important. At least for some.

>>35881567

And to add to this, if you based your life around dressing like a girl, you were living in a bubble. Sorry. You are a weird guy to normies.

>>35881504
I kinda feel disgusted cause this was my first thought too
but yeah I second this question
>>35881465
do you have a dick?

>>35881567
>>35881588
I am mentally and physically ill; I would die if I were to carry a baby to term. He wants me to pick between life without him and dying young. I don't think it's fair.

>>35881504
>>35881588
>>35881605
No more of this, no dick.

>>35881465
don't be pressured into having kids, you'll almost definitely regret it

>>35881633
uhhhhhhhhhhhhh what does that even mean

>>35881682
It means either my uterus would detach killing the fetus and I, or I would commit suicide, whichever came first.

>>35881633

Conversely you're forcing him to choose between staying with a woman incapable of making him happy and carrying a burdening guilt for wanting something for himself forever.

It's not up to you, and it would make you a psychologist to try to manipulate him into anything. Take the loss on this one, leave him, and move on.

>>35881633
>I am mentally and physically ill
we all are

>>35881771

>Psychologist

A psycho. My bad.

If you don't want to do it, just break up

You have your right to not wat to have any children, just like he has his right to want a woman who can give him offspring

>>35881929
But we love each other.

>>35881465
Isn't it obvious ? You got used.
People are monsters....sorry you are going through that anon.

Men are replaceable and disposable.

You may feel like you truly love him and attracted to his personality and appearance but odds are guys like him are a dime a dozen, and there are a few out of them who won't necessarily want to have children. Lots of guys have their tubes tied so they can cum all they want without the subsequent financial aftermath for the next eighteen years.

It may hurt to detach yourself from your current host and leech onto a new one, but the process will soon seem quick and painless once you fall asleep into your new partner's arms without being afraid of death by alien baby.

>>35881985
Doesn't sound like he loves you that much, tho

>>35881465
Your asshole can't get pregnant fag

adopt, motherfucker.

>>35882216
I told him we could adopt or get a surrogate and he said no.

Better question, is it reasonable to be asking him to marry?

>>35882216
she doesn't fuck mothers, fuck off

Go fuck his best friend

>>35881465
At the very least you should let him mate with other women.

>>35882363
Yeah, watch the movie "Breaking the Waves" and give him permission to make himself happy.

>>35882216
>looking after someone else child
no

>>35882251

>refusing the surrogate

I would prefer if my wife got a surrogate so she wouldn't ruin her body.

if I had a wife

>>35882363
He warned me that he was going to, but now he doesn't want to. I would have let him if he wanted a baby that bad. It would have been hard but I love him.

>>35882251
What? He won't even do the surrogate option? And he's aware that you would likely die from child birth?

>>35882488
It hurts so bad because it's like he wants me to die so he can get his way.

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>>35881465
ROASTIE TOASTIE GET OFF MY BOARDIE REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

Holy shit, get the actual fuck out your complete normie. Actually fuck off

>>35882530
What's his reasoning for this?

>>35882543
My only friend wants me to die or fuck off forever. Sounds pretty normie.

>>35882578
He just wants a biological child without having to pay any money and he's willing to sacrifice my life for it. I can't go along with it, it's not fair.

>>35882609
Would a surrogate really be that much more expansive than the normal way?

>>35881465
I can marry you. I don't want children.

>>35881465
No kids = no reason

Women don't provide much of value. I can do everything you do, and I actually do that living on my own (I even massage my own back).

That being said, if you can't offer him kids there goes half the reason to be in a relationship.

>>35881465
It's not reasonable, because I'd gladly marry a woman who can't have children.

>>35882754
Why ever be in a relationship then if there's nothing to gain but children?

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>>35881465
>Race-mix your people away goyim
>not working
>Traps aren't gay goyim
>not working
>Marry barren women goyim
Working hard today, kike fuck?

>>35882609
Protip: he doesn't care about you at all, run

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>>35881465
It's a hard pill but unless you let him raise children with another women on the side, its for the best

>>35882842
Relationship is half the reason
Having kids as testament to your relationship is the other reason.

If you can't have kids you can't bring your relationship full circle.

Infertiles are basically in the same boat as schizophrenics.

Though, you can still have kids through surrogate.

>>35881465
Assuming you're a woman you just need to use another's eggs. That's it and then your pregnant with some other help.

After reading through the replies a bit, I have gained insight on the situation. First off, he's most likely not using you. The only way he could, is if he were a stay at home man. Second, there isn't a right or wrong answer. If he wants children, then he needs to decide on whether he should stay with you or not. Although, if he had prior knowledge of the fact that you cannot have children, then that's kind of fucked up. Don't risk your own life on a risk. Hope you get through this anon.

>>35882886
Oh

>>35882899
I would let him do that.

>>35882918
I'm also schizophrenic so there's no winning. He just doesn't love me that much I guess. There were a lot of red flags that I missed.
>He laughs when I cry
>He yells at me all the time

>>35882950
>stay at home man

These exist? I thought pretty much all women didn't tolerate this

>>35881465
>bait: the post

For real tho, I don't want kids and I'm a tall white wealthy guy. Come live with me and do those things?

>>35882970
>schizophrenic
>can't have kids

You fucked up in a past life. Only way I can explain that luck.

>>35882950
He knew from the start I couldn't have kids.

>>35882942
Pregnancy is a danger to me, not an egg problem. Thanks though.

>>35881465
What use are you as a woman if you can't have kids? You're practically as worthless as a trap.

Think of that for a second. You literally are as much of a woman as a guy in a dress. No wonder he doesn't want marriage.

>>35883011
You should just be single. Clearly life doesn't want you to have kids or be in relationships if you're a schizophrenic who can't bear children.

I suggest taking up knitting and cats, or being a porn Star.

You won't find many relationships with that much baggage. You need your own private airliner for it.

Take this bait shit to /adv/.

>>35883001
Why even live at that point. Suicide sure is an option for her.

>>35883011
>Pregnancy is a danger to me
How so? If it's the giving birth part you can just get a c-section so I doubt it's that.

/r9k/ is the last place you want to ask relationship advice. too much toxicity and male posturing

>>35881465
men are awful, leave his sorry ass. you can find plenty other guys who want to be child free or will accept you.
>cook for him
>massage him
>loyal and good
and he would leave you even though you've been there for him. what a monster

>>35883103
My uterus would detach and my body would anhero.

>>35883119
I can tell you're a clit goblin

>>35883141
By the sounds of it, that's not exactly the worst thing considering your many downsides. At least, in your last breath, you could give someone something they want in life.

>>35883141
But would the baby survive? Thats all that matters, sweetheart.

>>35883141
Rekt.

You get to enjoy being a biological failure like all us Robots even while being a Stacy

>>35883160
I'm pretty much considering suicide today.

>>35883165
if the baby was carried to term it might survive, but it would be so it won't.

>>35883155
keep telling urself only women can be terrible, all people are equally capable of being douchebags

>>35882970
This kind of relationship is prone to jelousy and tragic breakup in the end. The best way would be to find a mate which does not want to get children. But he most likely already has a vision of a family, house. Ensuring continuation of his genetics in the form of offspring. These are important objectives for this man in which you cannot change.

>>35883186
I'm not a Stacy. I could describe myself as a mildred and this is my first and only relationship. With my only friend.

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>>35883141
Oh. Sounds awful. Depending on your age I guess you could always wait a bit and see if anything can change. Either that or make him go for a fucking surrogate.

My husband left me because of this. We kept trying but after three stillborns and six miscarriages, he left.

I'm sure he's happy now with his new wife, they already have a baby now.

>>35883200
I'm willing to bet you have no other options.

You have 4 options to consider:

1. Surrogacy and maintaining your broken relationship

2. Attempt for a true child and die like a hero

3. An hero

4. Leave him for either an alternate boy (Stacy) or be a cat lady robot like God intended.

>>35881465
Tell yourself: what's the point? Why do you do these things?

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>>35881465
Sorry to say this, but you failed the most important task every woman must do, bear her husband's children
>meanwhile in Africa

>>35883305
I don't want to die in childbirth like a cave man.

>>35883581
If you're unable to bear children then what function do you actually have in a relationship? I mean at this point you're basically just a hole that he can put his penis in. But if you can't have children then you're basically less valuable than a homo boyfriend.

>>35883581
So you're selfish and don't want to continue life even if it means making the ultimate sacrifice?

Why am I even surprised. You have a Vagina.

>>35883581
you won't have to, since only women give birth

>>35883665
The baby wouldn't even live, you illiterate. I would die for nothing and be remembered for getting came in then dying.

>>35883635
I'm a valuable partner and I fulfill many of his needs.

>>35883708
LOL

Original Burn

>>35883720
Rather brash and loquacious of you to call me illiterate, but considering you're a mentally ill infertile, I'll cut you some slack.

>>35881465
become a nun

select all squares with street signs

>>35881465

At least he's upfront.

He wants you.

But he also wants kids.

In todays world WE WANT IT ALL.

Don't act like you wouldn't behave similarly if he didn't meet your expectations for what you want.

Because you would. I would suggest visiting a doctor together and finding an alternate method, if you really want to hang onto this.

>>35881465
Why marry? You looking to divorce rape him?

>>35882970
Those are HUGE red flags, get the fuck away from him, it's for the best, he probably just wanted someone by his side and chose you cause you were vulnerable

>>35883720
>I'm a valuable partner and I fulfill many of his needs.

Name me one need that you fulfill that a trap couldn't.

Why would he want to be with a schizo woman who can't have children? It's you who is being greedy and unreasonable expecting him to stay with you despite you not being able to fulfill the one role that a woman is expected to carry out in her life.

>>35883882
Best response so far in this

>>35883846
No, I'd sign a prenuptial agreement.


>>35883882
There's no difference between me and a trap except the genitals.

>>35883867
This.

Ignore the other posts like these >>35883882

>>35883946
t. original beta male

>>35883946
White knight I bequeef the duty of friendship upon thee

>>35883882
If it's greedy to want to get married, this board is sinning.

>>35884172
Wtf are you talking about you utter fucking spastic? It's greedy to want to force a man into a marriage where you can't fulfill your role. You can stop whiteknighting now, the QT schizo fembot isn't going to have sex with you

>>35884221
I do think want to force him into marriage. I want him to love me enough to marry me.

He keeps making jokes about proposing (as in, its absurd that he ever would) and it really makes me feel bad.

>>35884287
*don't

woreganil

>>35884287
It's comical how tragic and humorous your current state of being is.

>>35884326
Doesn't this stuff ever happen to other people? What do they do?

>>35884422
Honestly it rarely happens, especially like it's happening to you. As much as you can "take care" of your boyfriend, schizophrenia (even medicated) is an issue that people have to deal with in order to be around a person. That's already a deal breaker for a number of people

Then you add infertility to that, it's hard to see how you could really be worth it, sorry. The eclectic actions of a schizophrenic overshadow wonderful personalities easily.

Having a kid with you would at least be a saving grace for when you grow old and indolent (or even violent with dementia).

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>>35884491
I'm not even rich or good looking. I have nothing that would compel someone to stay with me.

>>35884554
Be glad your boyfriend stays with you, then.

I'm sure you're crying by now but we're all dealt shit hands at the game of life. Else we wouldn't have R9K.

But your situation is unique, which means you'll have to decide how you want to proceed.

Why is marriage so important?

I mean you act like it's some small deal to make that kind of commitment to someone.

Marriage is unreasonable in today's society. It doesn't mean he doesn't love you.

Let it go.

>>35883385
Fucking niggers. Kek
Once someone told me that they pop out so many kids to make sure that there are at least a few who can become successful with something and become able to feed the whole fucking family. Barely does that happen of course.

>>35881465
is he like /pol/ muh white race or something?

wanting children does not mean that you are brainwashed, if you were more mature and able to respect different points of view maybe your life would be better

>>35881633
>I don't think it's fair.
That's because you only consider yourself a thinking feeling person, you consider him an accessory.
He also has to live with the decision for the remainder of his life as well, and he can't bear not having children. It's better to let you know sooner than later.

Both of you are at an unfortunate and painful impasse. You were not meant to be.

>>35885762
>you were not meant to be

Rest In Peace

>>35884736
Not her but I think marriage is a big deal, or at least should be treated as such. To me marriage is the ultimate expression of complete devotion to your lover; you love them so much that you are willing to permanently bind yourself to this person in front of your god, state, and family. Not that I'm particularly religious or anything, but you get it.

Personally I long to be married to a woman who I completely trust, and who completely trusts me. I want a partner who through thick and thin, good times, bad times, and when we have nothing but the clothes on our backs, will STILL be there looking out for me, while I look out for her. I read a post on here about a guy saying his mom stays up until his father comes home no matter what, like 2 am, just in case he wants dinner or something, and so he doesn't come home to a dark house. That is devotion, and that is what I want. Holy SHIT do I want that. My soul fucking yearns to be part of a whole. The worst part is that I know it will never happen. I'm turning 25 this year and haven't had a single girlfriend. I haven't even started this whole mate finding process this late in my life and why should I? So I can eventually get tricked into thinking I found the one and have my life ruined?

Also I do feel bad for OP, being infertile isn't something I would wish on anyone. Even with the mental illness and other shit, at least she would be able to fufill her basic human function. Being infertile at birth is basicly nature's way of saying "you are such a fucking mistake that I don't want to keep making this version of human anymore". It's like being told by your parents that they regret having you.

>>35881767
Judging by your suicide comment, you're clearly able to have kids and are just a lying, selfish, whiny faggot.

Thank God our bf is dumping you in the trash where you belong

>>35885762
I don't consider him an accessory. I just have done so much to compromise and he's done nothing so I feel like he should give a little.

>he would ditch me in an instant for a genetic copy of himself?

I would ditch a girl is she had a <high school understanding of biology as well

>>35886590
>I just have done so much to compromise and he's done nothing

Then why do you want to be with him?

>>35886571
What makes you think I'm selfish?

>>35886639
Because I love him and I want to spend the rest of my life with him. Simple.

>>35886590
>you're compromising
In what way?

>>35886680
Looks like you got your eyes on a oneitis and it won't work out

Especially if he already stated he wants kids.

Your relationship is as over as this thread

/thread

>>35886680
Well evidently he wants to spend the rest of his life raising a family. Unless you could sway him towards adoption (or even surrogacy, if you have someone close enough to you that would be willing) then you're probably out of luck.

The drive to reproduce is l i t e r a l l y the biological imperative of all life.

>cannot bear children

Sorry but you're basically USELESS

You only have value as a cocksleeve for the upcoming 5 or so years.

He WILL dump you when the time comes. There is nothing you can do about it.

>>35886689
I told him we could adopt or do a surrogate.

>>35886730
Why do some people not have this drive?

>>35886809
Because in many ways humans have moved beyond the biological drives that governed us for millions of years

But obviously, in lots of ways we haven't.

If you could have kids, would you not want to?

>I told him we could adopt or do a surrogate.

Presumably he's against this? I understand not wanting to adopt if he wants to raise his own family, but what's wrong with surrogacy? It would still be yours and his child in every way.

>>35886809
Is he against surrogacy? why?

>>35882609
He sounds like a fucking sociopath. Are you sure this relationship has been anything asides from manipulation? I only ask because disregarding the life and needs of someone you "love" for personal gain is a major red flag.

>>35886857
No, if I could I wouldn't.

He says he won't do a surrogacy because he doesn't like nontraditional things.

my gf is the same and we agreed that I could impregnate another woman and we would raise it as our own

my girlfriend is a bit of a cuck desu

>>35886930
You know that surrogacy would allow you two to have a biological child, but have it gestated inside someone else, right?

>>35886917
>He sounds like a fucking sociopath
fuck off nu-male, if a man wants children and his partner can't provide that he is within his rights to go find another woman

>>35883882
>It's not greedy to make impossible demands
>You're greedy for being unable to comply with them
>>35886946
Please specify where I said it would be wrong for him to move on with his life.

>>35886941
she doesn't want to go through the trouble and says I can just fuck some other girl

>>35886921
Evidently he doesn't like nontraditional things more than he likes you then

Have you ever considered that this is simply his way of trying to lessen the hurt to your feelings when admitting that he doesn't see himself with you in the long term?

>>35881465
Having a biological copy of your self is the best path of establishing a legacy.

So having kids is the most natural impulse of any human being. That is why we look for partners. He will leave you. Might as well cut ties now.

>>35886809
He said he doesn't want to adopt

He said he doesn't want a surrogate

You said you die if you try to give birth

What part of 2 + 2 = 4 do you not get?

You're wasting everyone's time with this shit and guess what hun, there's nothing you can do about it.

I wonder what it's like to have a girl be obsessed with you like OP is, I can't really imagine it

>>35886979
Then stop replying.

I get it, he doesn't want me. I'm just tying up loose ends.

Don't be selfish op. I understand this is a terrible situation for both of you and you two are victims of circumstance. You can't make him stay with you and give up his dream of a family, or he'd resent you forever. It's selfish, just like it's selfish of him to give you this ultimatum. Yet, it's clear nothing can change here, the end is inevitable. You should be glad you haven't gotten married so you can try and find another bf without being the ex-husband having woman. Best of luck to you

If starving women in Africa can carry a child to term then OP can

She's just being a drama whore making it all about "muh feelings and attention" and her partner sees right through it, disappointed that so many here fell for it

You're a genetic dead end. honestly op you should off yourself, sorry to say.

>>35887040
this. OP is just as useless to her bf as she in to her mother

>>35887032
Starving women in Africa die giving birth all the time, retard.

>>35887001
No do continue, I rather enjoy watching you writhe in self loathing.

What is the point of getting married if you can't have kids?

>>35887160
See >>35885857
He explained why

>>35887103
re-read what I said

> carry a child to term
learn to read, idiot

>>35881465
>it's another girl (male) thread

get bent you mentally ill autogynophiliac

>>35887160
There is no point. You go on dates to find a suitable parent for your future children. You marry them when you enjoy their company enough to live with them. You have a few kids and you grow old raising them and watching them bloom into their own lives.

Can't imagine the shell-of-a-relationship that would be a childless marriage for 12+ years.

>>35887192
Nope that makes no sense at all. Everything he wants can be achieved without marriage, which is merely a terrible business transaction, at least for men, at least in the United States.

>>35887250
Marriage is a legal contract between two partners.

It's good for children.

If no children, then pets or a shared business.

If neither, then marriage is unnecessary.

If hubby is using you as baby factory, reroll dating rolodex until doppleganger pops up that lacks the desire for gene propagation.

HTH!

>>35887299
Well, we have a dog together.

>>35887333
Well unless he can impregnate it I don't see why that's relevant

>>35887358
>if no children, then pets

>>35887470
I'm not >>35887299, I disagree that pets are a valid reason to hold a marriage together.

They may well /become/ the reason, if the couple can't have kids, but if either partner wanted kids they'll only ever be a shallow replacement.

>>35881465
>If he knew before now
He really should have said something earlier and this is a dick move
>If he didn't
You really should have discussed this earlier and are both at fault

>>35881465
LOL POOPDICKS BTFO

>>35883001
>can't have kids that inherit a propensity for schizophrenia
better than the sum of its parts at least

>>35887250

I'm >>35885857
You are correct in that I could have a loyal partner without marriage, but if I'm never intending on tying the knot then I feel like there is no point in pursuing a relationship with anyone. You know how I feel about marriage, so if I'm never willing to marry the person I'm with, how can I say that I have complete trust in them? I'm looking for someone to marry anon.

I treat marriage as if there is no going back, like I'm handing the flame of my soul to this person to keep safe for me as I ask for theirs in turn. If that person decides that what I offer isn't enough and betrays me in the worst possible way, like infidelity, then they might as well be pouring water on that flame.

marriage IS a bad business transaction, but only for those who treat it as such