Holy fucking reeeeee My autism has peaked. >Be me >Living

>>35867428
How does a condom clog a toilet? Is your plumbing made of fucking bendy straws?

>>35867470
Could be those itty bitty plastic pipes they put into single-wide mobile homes.

t. former Kentuckian.

>>35867428
>>Flush condom down toilet

okay but why

>>35867470

Anything that isn't toilet paper can clog a toilet

I don't know why Americans think that toilets = magical garbage

>>35867470
The house is rather old, it is the only reason I could rationalize the clog. Plus from what I have read and heard they have a history of clogging and or lingering.

if it comes back up you should definitely admit that it's yours straight aware or both of your parents will think they're being cheated on by the other

You're fucked bro, your parents are going to know their son is a deviant pervert, and you'll have to NEET it up on the streets.

>>35867428
If they already know you're a loser, just be honest. They will probably roll their eyes and call you a moron and let it go.

>>35867594
I realize it wasn't smart and rather autistic.
>>35867626
I figured that is the only option, but I am trying to figure out how to hide it.
>>35867644
Don't say this. It will scare me.
>>35867649
That is the plan, but I need an in depth excuse. My parents know I am unfortunate when it comes to girls.
>>35867675
They would never drop it that easily.

I used to just jack off all over my bedroom wall till there was a dark brown slimey mess. Then I got the talk.

You'll be fine OP

update us OP. did your pops find it ?

>>35867702
wanking with a condom on is pretty common for teenage boys, your dad's probably done it himself when he was younger so I wouldn't worry too much if he finds it, your mum probably wouldn't understand though

OP give us an age range and i'll tell you how fucked you are

File: 1484023489863.jpg (36KB, 657x527px) Image search: [Google]

36KB, 657x527px

>>35867428
OP REAL TALK HERE

YOU NEED TO BLAME IT ON MUMMY

i've done this a few times before it works

HELIUM
E
L
I
U
M

the only way tbqh

>>35867973
Not yet. It must be really deep, I probably have 8 hours max
>>35868815
Anon please, there is no way this could work. She is a bitch but this would fuck me, my dad is beta and my mom wears the pants.
>>35868842
What does this mean?

File: 1489807961746.png (525KB, 960x717px) Image search: [Google]

525KB, 960x717px

Could be worse
>originalololololol

>>35869120
Your pic is better. The entire floor is covered in piss/shit water

Hey Anon, don't worry about it. Just say you were messing with it and shouldn't have flushed it. I'm sure they'll forget about it super quickly and you can live your life like it never happened. Nobody is gonna think you did it on purpose, and if they're gonna get so mad over an accident that they'd kick you out, fuck living there anyway

>>35869047
it means flush some helium down your toilet to unclog it