>become friends with stacy >stacy likes me but I keep my

(2/2)
>fastforward 6 months
>have to see stacy every other day at university, she has bf now
>she tries to talk to me, I panic attack every time and can't help but talk to her
>delete her off everything, tell her to stop talking to me
>still have to see her and talk to her every once in awhile
>she acts friendly because she is nice, but she won't actually be my friend anymore
>go through the day thinking about her constantly
>can control myself from messaging her but sometimes in my drug binges I black out and message her how I feel about her
>she never responds anymore
>can't help but keep thinking about her, can control myself to stop messaging her
>can't control anxiety and depression realizing I fucked up our friendship
>use drugs and alcohol to distract myself
>try to get better, but even more isolated when I'm sober
>have to see her at university
>she never cared about me she just wanted me for attention
>have to keep telling myself so I fallout of love with her
>see these girls around me that like me, but they are all just looking for one night stands and "fun"
>can't help but not like anybody
>can't stop drinking

It's like I need to stand myself up straight enough so I can graduate with a good job, but I can barely stop drinking long enough not to be hungover all the time.

I know there is no such thing as oneitis anymore. But it's like I can't control my thoughts about her because I have to see her so often. I can't help but think about her. It's starting to creep me out. I know I'm not a stalker type an I actively avoid her now at all costs, but the constant thoughts about her freak me out.

>>35846148
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Xp6JfX7HxZ4

and now I'm drunk again but I have to wake up tomorrow and do things

>>35846148
lol, anon she was a whore, fuck off, go where ever you want, hook up with some more chicks, forget about her, never message her again. She'll eventually message u back and when she does just ignore her.

>>35846319
it's not even her anymore anon, I just don't really like people anymore. All these people I meet I can't trust even if they are my friends, nobody can really truly be my true friend, I only do drugs with these people or drink at the bar. I would rather do it alone now than