>"haha come on anon, stand up in front of the class and

>>35776373
>that kid that was forced to stand up and give presentation while having a visible boner

fucking end my life, why did they have to put me in a class with a ton of slutty stacies

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>anon it's your turn to read aloud
Then the kids in the class were making fun of my monotone voice. Calling me frog-man. The whole class was chuckling. The teacher didn't discipline or admonish them for calling me names or laughing. I stopped reading and the teacher decided to get pissy AT ME. Then I got a 0 for the day.

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>>35776373
>computer wont log on
>powerpoint takes ages to load
>open up wrong file
>computer crashes

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>>35776373
I am legitimately amazing at presentations

All you have to do is

1) make clean and visually impressive slides
2) rehearse every word in your speech

people will think you will sound like a robot or monotone if you rehearse EVERY word but as long as you aren't like directly reading off a paper, you actually will have a natural tone and pace. You also have to write in a sort of natural speech pattern and not just as if you were writing an essay. Write like a comedian, penning in your pauses and casual interjections like 'ok, so lets finally get into'

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>>35776373
>mfw im a teachers aide
>mfw will be a teacher within 2 years
>mfw substitute sometimes

>Lets split up into groups! Go on!
>I'll fill here often, how about each of you introduce yourself to me, and tell me a single hobby and your favorite sport!
>Pick on anyone I can from the back rows to come up and pick anyone I can who seemed to be paying no attention to answer questions

Fuck you all. Its MY TIME now. I'm going to rake every single motherfucker over the coals with a big stupid teachery grin on my face the whole time and pretend I don't know the shitstorm I'm creating for everyone. Eat my fucking shit! I'll have you doing group work and claiming you like soccer forever!

BAHAHAHAAHAHAA

>>35777240
This is why I've always hated teachers.
They train many years to be able to take a small paycheck to abuse kids

>hate presenting
>have to defend master thesis in 3 months
>a group of professors will ask difficult questions about my research work

I'm not gonna make it.

>>35776373
>Doing my M.Sc
>Have to pass all my models
>One of them is all about presentations
>My first one was terrible
>My second one is worse

I'm going to fail out of my masters because I'm terrified of public speaking, fuck everything.

>>35776373
>u-uh okay
>run up to board with sruff arms
>look at entire class and begin
>I LIKE TO MOVE IT MOVE IT I LIKE MOVE IT
>look at class for three seconds and then run back to seat

I actually liked giving presentations, it allowed me to openly stunt my superiority over everyone else

>>35777321
>Have to give a colloquium to the school on my thesis
I'm not even going to make it that far.

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>>35776373
>hands start visibly shaking

>>35777364
>Start laughing uncontrollably
JUST KILL ME NOW

>>35777240
>have teacher
>have """laidback""" teacher
>making jokes about your dinner
>everyone's forced to laugh
>"haha you guys have to laugh because you're my students"
>everyone laughs
>be first day of school
>just want to make friends
>"so i heard this teacher is jooish"
>mfw I'm jooish but nobody believed me after that
>everyone hates me
>mfw teacher says the word joo and all the jooish kids start making jooish jokes
Someone please shoot up my school please

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>First assembly day of grade 1
>No warning or anything
>"And now our new grade 1 students will tell us a little about themselves"
>Meant to stand up in front of this school and say my name and what I want to do when I grow up
>"Next up is Anon, c'mon up here Anon"
>Outright refuse to stand up
>Just shake up head and refuse to stand
>"Okay moving on..."

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Can somebody tell me why teachers would make the kid with severe reading difficulties stand upo and do presentations
poor bastard begged to do the presentation it one on one with the teacher after class so his anxiety stutter would give him trouble.

fucking hell it was a mess, poor bastard

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>>35777240
>claiming you like soccer
I fucking knew they knew

>Class! Anon doesn't have a group, who'd like him in their group?

>>35776958
>While everyone else is loading their presentation up, teacher is talking and explaining stuff so people are distracted and not noticing them
>When its your time to load up, he doesn't talk, everyone sits and stares and waits.

>>35777494
They just fucking hated us. All of us.

>>35777494
Teachers are almost always extroverted people, it's a characteristic of the career profile. They will rarely understand the anxiety classrooms can bring to less socially conducive individuals. Young Stacey teachers are the worst about this.

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>>35777428
Another

>First speech of primary school
>Other kids are meters away sitting on the floor in front of me
>Hands and legs shake
>Voice unsteady, mouth is dry
>Face bright red
>Breathing is loud, robotic and unnatural
>Reading too fast
>Eyes on the shaking palm-cards in front of me because no podium
>Lose place, need to restart card multiple times
>At the end of each sentence take a deep breathe like I am drowning
>Speech is completely wrong, I was too stupid to understand the task (focused on the animal too much and not its environment)
>Teacher starts asking me things I should have covered
>You should know this Anon c'mon
>Try and put together answers based on what the other kids said in their speeches
>Didn't listen because I was trying to learn my speech while they were doing theirs
>Okay class, tell us what should Anon improve on?
>His breathing
>His pacing
>His eye contact
>Anything else class? No?
>He also didn't know his topic
>Sit down Anon, I'll probably have to fail you

I eventually got better by the end of high school but I still sucked dicks and usually asked the teachers if I could do my speech during lunchtime with just them and myself.

>>35777081
Throw in a joke either but don't pause and wait for people to laugh, brush over it and continue. If they chuckle they chuckle, if not then it won't be awkward because bam next thing.

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>>35777529
>>Class! Anon doesn't have a group, who'd like him in their group?
Ewww, no.

>I'll be choosing the groups for this presentation
>Anon you're with Stacy who refuses to do any work and just wants you to tell her which slides to read, Nice Chad who's dumb as rocks and who's side of the presentation is shit tier and Guy who'll never appear again not even for the presentation itself.

>>35777390
I hate shit like that
>Stacy keeps making quite offensive jabs at me
>People chuckle
>One day she does it
>I jab back
>Anon that's so hurtful!
>Wow that's kinda dickish, we were only having fun, man
>No need to act like that it was just a joke bro

I actually really enjoyed presentations at school on the premise that it was by myself. I was natural at planning and execution of public speaking, especially in large groups of people. I hated it, however, when i was in a group. The people i was with were almost always incompetent at proper speech and usually dragged me down. Funny enough i have a really hard time talking one on one to people but not in large groups.

t.ENTP

>>35777494
They like to watch them suffer, I mean we already have a trainee teacher here saying all the torturous shit they're gonna do.

>>35777618
Yeah I'd say High School teachers are always extroverted people because it's an extroverted job, college not so much. Sometimes you'll get people who are only there as they just wanna sit down and quietly do their research but they gotta teach as part of the university staff too.

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>other kid in my group sends me a copy-pasted paragraph from wikipedia
>i do the entire powerpoint
>has the nerve to ask if he can sit in the teacher's chair and change slides while I read out the entire powerpoint

>>35777882
Im a teacher and while I don't weigh out the points for each individual student in group projects (its your responsibility to report students who aren't participating), its clear which students aren't putting in effort and I am less lenient on their written reports

>>35776373
>This presentation isn't for marks
>it's just to share your findings with the class

>>35776373
>not having an issue talking in front of the class.

>actually doing school work.

Still lonely.

>>35778848
Its the worst when its group graded.

>>35778848
do you even try to even it out group works or you just put one smart guy and 3 dumbos in the same group?

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>doing any work
>ever

Just be like me and never do anything. You're a living, breathing man. Do you honestly do things you don't want to?

>>35776373
i can't
i have an erection because i was staring at a girl's feet

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>first day of class
>stacy teacher expects us to easily exchange contact info with total strangers
>makes us group up every class
>publicly and loudly showed her surprise in front of the class when a quiet guy asked a question
>made us do show and tell

Fucking community college I hate this place

I was surprisingly good at this. The trick is to not prepare too much, that's forced. If you think and talk you worry less about the crowd and you talk more natural.