You have to commit a crime by Monday or else you will be arrested

>>35623883
shoplifting maybe but then i'd have to leave my house
probably just find a movie to watch and download it illegally
failing that probably a spot of child porn, credit card fraud and dealing cocaine
go away mr fbi

>you have to commit a crime
>else you'll be arrested
I'm not sure you know how this works.

Public masturbation

>>35624018
I think I had a stroke

>>35623883
Holocaust revision. A good ol' simple thoughtcrime.

t.Germany

I commit crimes daily by pirating. No worries

I'd go to my friends house and tear the tag off her matress.

I'd throw a rock on a public building's window.

>stand in the middle of town square
>shoot my pistol straight in the air
Done.

>>35623883
I'd j walk

>>35623883
Create a Club Penguin account without my parent's permission

Not file my taxes on time.

>>35623883
pirate a movie

Pick off a booger and put in in a library book.

>>35623883

Mopery.

>>35625662
dude who cares nobody has even used a library since the 90s

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>pirates anime in HD
Oooh I'm feeling devilish

>>35623883
Mass genocide. Now fuck off FBI.

Litter

>>35623883
I eat a grape off the fruit section on the supermarket

>>35623883
I'm be in a shopping centre, train station or other public place. Then I'd head over to the toilet. Oh! There's a charge to do something the body simply can't help? Not today urinary fascists. Then I piss all around the area, especially in the coin slot. All over the walls, any posters and so on.

>>35623883
>Jaywalking
>Loitering
>Petty theft
>Vandalism (one splotch of spray paint on a graffitied wall)

There's a lot of easy ways out of this. If it had to be a serious crime i would just break into the abandoned house across the street from me and steal something left behind.

>>35625867
I forgot the easiest one of all, pirating shit online.

Pirating shit is usually a tort, only a crime if you make money off of it.
I'll go ride the train without paying, seems low risk enough.

>>35623883

I looked up something on dumblaws.com and apparently sitting on the curb of a city street and drinking beer out of a bucket is illegal, so I'd probably do that. Technically meets the requirements and I highly doubt I'd get in any trouble for it.

Rape.
Easily.
So many qts to lose my virginity to.

Kill Tonald Drumpf

I'd probably possess some lascivious exhibition of the genitals or pubic area if you know what I mean

Well, I am literally pirating something right now so I guess I am done.

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>>35623883
Steal a shit ton of money.

Blaze up ma niggah