You have a genie. You get three wishes. There is no possible

File: BobPage.png (296KB, 515x510px) Image search: [Google]

296KB, 515x510px

unparalleled Godhood I guess

>I wish there was a possible way to cheat the system for more wishes.
>I wish I could wish for more wishes.
>I wish for more wishes.

I wish for world peace.
The secret to life.
And a nice fat cock.

>>35508799
No
origionalll

>>35508641
>big uncut penis
>maintain a perfect physique while being able to eat as much as I want
>having the face that I fantasize about having in my imagination

Life would probably be good

Pocket dimension consisting of a shape-shifting mansion, changes shape based on my current needs.

Access to internet, infinite money that can be used to order anything from the internet which will arrive at the house.
Able to enter this dimension at will, say if I'm at uni in class and I wish to, I can transport to the pocket dimension but simultaneously some magic/clone copy of me takes my place at uni.
Ultimate pocket dimension hikkimori.

or

AI that lives inside the internet. like Wintermute from Neuromancer.

File: 135325-7171-infinity-gauntlet.jpg (49KB, 484x640px) Image search: [Google]

49KB, 484x640px

>>35508789
Wish granted.
origionul

File: 1488912470499.jpg (99KB, 640x612px) Image search: [Google]

99KB, 640x612px

i wish to be dead
i also wish that you free from being a genie and die.

I wish I would never have to eat again
I wish I would never have to sleep again
gf

File: www.png (716KB, 954x644px) Image search: [Google]

716KB, 954x644px

>>35508824
Your gonna have to be more specific on the second one.

Some huge quantity of money with all immunities from it being taken from me

Save the other two wishes

>>35508859
Ok there you go I guess.

File: It's_Kirby.gif (68KB, 476x340px) Image search: [Google]

68KB, 476x340px

>>35508641
1. I want a magic dick that can satisfy any woman I sleep with, impregnates wombs only when I desire it, is immune to all STDs, and can cure and immunize against any and all STDs of any partners I have raw sex with. Then I would be worshiped as a literal sex god.

2. For humanity to live in a post-scarcity society.

3. For the world to have the tech and know how to leave Earth's atmosphere and colonize other planets.

File: 1000000000-one-billion-dollars-of-usa-front-sample-only1.jpg (591KB, 1300x548px) Image search: [Google]

591KB, 1300x548px

>>35508982
Good choice saving them.

>>35508925
Too late for second and third wish because you're already dead and can't make it.

>I wish I were a little bit taller
>I wish I were a baller
>I wish I had a girl; if I did, I would call her

I wish I were sexually attractive

I wish I lived alone

I wish I had my shit together

Superhuman discipline
Blue eyes
An extra 2"

>>35508982
>thinking a magic genie can protect you from the IRS

think again, motherfucker

File: www.png (583KB, 954x644px) Image search: [Google]

583KB, 954x644px

>>35509002
BOOM! There you go.
origalnal

File: 23-052624-things_your_girlfriend_does_that_drive_you_crazy.jpg (94KB, 1080x540px) Image search: [Google]

94KB, 1080x540px

>>35508947
The other two you get as well.

File: www.png (476KB, 954x960px) Image search: [Google]

476KB, 954x960px

>>35508857
There you go.
orugillitus

File: www.png (380KB, 954x644px) Image search: [Google]

380KB, 954x644px

>>35508799
Forgot the penis.

File: www.png (452KB, 1080x644px) Image search: [Google]

452KB, 1080x644px

>>35509064
Don't know what the second one means.

>>35508641
1. I wish for everyone on Earth to love themselves and each other truly and deeply.
2. I wish for access to the internet to be universal and free for all people.
3. I wish for the perfect, most comfortable pair of panties.

One selfish wish is okay, I think.

File: 1488593909026.jpg (139KB, 1024x942px) Image search: [Google]

139KB, 1024x942px

I wish for a nice bf
I wish that when I die, I will have the most comfy afterlife possible, so comfy that I can't describe it from my current perspective, tailored specifically to my needs (this may include omnipotence or another wish genie, or may not)
I wish for everyone in the multiverse or that's in other states of existence to be free to do whatever they want except enslave or interfere with each other without consent

I just wish that there was a way that every person who has come into my life and made an impact, no matter how small, knows that I care about them and wish them the best, even if we've long since lost touch.

Sod the other two wishes, I just want them to know what I feel unable to say, then I can leave this place.

>>35509228
It's fucking lyrics dumbass

>>35509541
Your wishes have been granted. Wait for the changes, look for the signs.

>>35509892
Thanks man!

>tfw this actually made me feel better

>>35508641
I wish everyone else in the world had 3 wishes
I wish nobody but me had wishes
I wish you to be free

First I wish the genie had a tiny penis, then I wish he had a sub average IQ, then I wish him free but he is a human with no powers.

>>35509995
Don't give up! Become the kind of person you'd want to date so you're ready when he shows up.

File: iu[6].jpg&f=1.jpg (92KB, 975x576px) Image search: [Google]

92KB, 975x576px

>>35510094
>You're right, his power does exceed my own
>Mmbut not for long

>>35509541
Those are some grand as fuck wishes.

HOW BOUT A LITTLE MORE BAKLAVAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

>>35508641
>A huge amount of money, hundreds of millions of dollars
>Genius level intelligence
>Good health for the rest of my life.
It's a boring, probably fairly standard list, but for me it would be the optimal one.

File: 1486491297625.png (27KB, 134x118px) Image search: [Google]

27KB, 134x118px

>>35508641
Oh god king jinn, hear my plea

>i wish to extremely attractive to everyone, but only loved by the person I choose. This effect is everlasting, no matter what

>I want access to all knowledge of all of the universe, from before earth, to even the end of time, available to me, but only as I search for it. Includes graphics, details, even a sort of vs thing where I can experience specific parts of history or the future at leisure

>thinking you're a genie like in the alladin movie that you've started the thread with, I of course wish for your freedom

i wish I had a phone that was 20 years ahead of the curve but it could only be charged by fucking horses.

The other 2 wishes don't matter, I just want the phone so I can give it away on Craigslist.

>>35508799

I lold way too hard at this. Should've been the first post you magnificent faglors

>>35510237
Alright, show's over. I'm free now. Don't gotta give anyone else shit! If you didn't already wish, have fun with your shitty, magicless life.

>>35509541
Another wish genie would be more wishes, which is cheating. As said in OP, no way to cheat.

>complete mastery over all artforms without any negative consequences

>shape-shifting that has no negative consequences

>healing touch that has no negative consequences

Genies are dicks.

>>35508641
>Immortality
>Ability to fly
>Ability build shit houses computers cars roads robots

Why didn't Jasmine get any wishes?

>I wish Aladdin had a HUGE monster penis
>I wish Aladdin was a prince again
>I wish Jafar had no powers, you know, just in case somebody finds him in the sequel

>Genie I wish you free

File: c3b.jpg (31KB, 456x320px) Image search: [Google]

31KB, 456x320px

I just want the power to go back in time 10 years and change my life. I literally do not want anything else. The only reason I'm here is because of one accident that fucked me and put me in a wheelchair.

>>35508641
I wish for
>the power to transform anyone including myself into anything i want at will
>magic to become real and change the world
>the ability to learn skills instantly

I'd become the worlds first master wizard and make millions of dollars before everyone else figures out how to use magic

>immortality
>infinite intelligence
>superior regenerative powers

>>35510342
That's fine. It was just an example of something that might make me comfy. If it's excluded that is okay.

File: 1486780084925.jpg (68KB, 906x1086px) Image search: [Google]

68KB, 906x1086px

>>35510342
>I wish people had to do whatever I asked
>Okay here is a magic lamp, I want these three wishes
>"yes master"
I'm not wishing for more wishes or exceeding my limit.

>>35508641
I want all the people I hate to forever lose the habilitacion to tell lies be it either full lies, missrepresentations or loes by omission, nothing but factual truth from them, nothing but honesty

Some genie tid-bits:

Robin Williams tooke a 7mil+ pay cut to voice Genie on the promise that Disney would not use his voice to sell merchendise. Being the Jews that Disney is they did it anyways and apologized to Williams with a Picasso painting.

File: 1.gif (2MB, 500x500px) Image search: [Google]

2MB, 500x500px

I wish for immortality ofc

Save the last two wishes for when I'm in a pinch

>>35510178
It's not often that you come across a wish-granting genie. I figure it's best to make the most of it while you can.

I wish I could maintain perfect health without eating drinking or sleeping.

I wish I had the power to save the current state of the universe and load any previously made save at will. I have an unlimited number of saves and if I die, my previous save is loaded. My mind exists outside the save system to I always retain knowledge of reloading.

I wish I could disable or enable my two previously defined powers at will in order to get drunk, sleep, die, etc.

>>35510425
Oh. I'll allow it.

>>35509541
I unwish this anon's wishes.
I wish this anon constantly smelled of mackeral no matter how much they bathed.
I wish for a grilled cheese.

>>35508641
For all of the material things I want to appear and disappear when ever I say the word oregano three times.

The theory of ten dimensions to be real if it isn't already

Control up to the tenth dimension through a virtual command prompt that has an advanced AI that can type my thoughts in correct format when I'm lazy

With this I can basically do anything I want because i could have control over the 10th dimension through coding.

>>35510487
Only correct answer for the question.

>>35510625
You can't interfere with what I want as per the wish I already made

File: 1489301992718.jpg (285KB, 495x597px) Image search: [Google]

285KB, 495x597px

First wish is for this cutie to be my gf!

Second wish is for world peace!

Third wish is for all the robots in this thread to get gfs!

time control
space control
invincibility

now i have everything come at me niggers

>>35510701
So do the ones that already wished for gfs get an extra or...

>>35510683
I can do whatever the fuck I want, I have a genie.

I wish your bf was living inside of you like a parasitic twin.

>I wish I can have any power I want for an hour at a time, shapeshifting, flight, teleportation, healing, mind control, all of it

>The ability to always have enough money for something out of pocket

>The ability to never get STDs, or anything related because I'm gonna need it [/spoilers]

>>35510760
The genie already left
What's your problem anyway?

>>35510683
>>35510760
Sorry , the dickhead is right. The most recent wish supercedes an older one.

>>35510801
I wish the genie was dead.

>to have a million dollars in my bank account

>ability to stop time

>complete immortality

>>35508641
Lobo-level immortality, the infinity gauntlet, and the abilities of all superheros in Marvel ever

>>35510868
---->>>35508877
origantis