So you want a gf huh? Let me simulate that for you. First

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So you want a gf huh?
Let me simulate that for you.

First of all I see you woke up extra early to be productive, maybe make some coffee or breakfast, "NO!!!! COME BACK TO BED AND CUDDLE WITH ME AND KISS ME!" She'll say. "But... I kinda want to make some coffee and take a shower.." you'll say.

If you ignore her and do as you please she's not happy,

Oh here's another one?
"Let's get a dog." She'll say. But you, you don't like dogs, too much work to handle and they never shut up. "Oooh let's get this scraggly mutt, he's so cute" and you'll try to talk her out of it "no you can't train him, he's gonna pee all over the house and there's gonna be stains everywhere" but you compromise and... you get a dog.

You try to train it, but she doesn't like that you yell at him, she says you're too mean to him. You give up. "fine you train him, or spend the money to train him." She doesn't and the dog is whining all night.

You get 4 hours of sleep combined after waking up throughout the night to tell the dog to shut up.

It's morning, you roll over to check your phone, she goes off with "get off your phone and cuddle with me :)" but you just want to check the news or your email, "ughhhh you're always on your phone you never want to cuddle with me" you ignore her because you'll cuddle her in a second when you're done. She goes on her phone and you think that's that, no, you see that she's texting someone out of the corner of your eye, you ask yourself "who is she talking to?" So you move in closer, then she moves the phone away to where you can't definitely see, you say "what are you doing" in a sweet way, trying not to assume she's being nefarious and she clicks home and says "what!?" You ask who are you texting and she goes "a friend".

Now you could go 2 ways, ask her to see the phone and get a potential "you don't trust me!!!" Or check her phone, usually after he deletes some messages in which she'll say "you broke my trust". It's all a game!!! Stay single!!!!
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