have you ever met with anyone from 4chan before? heres a story

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>we end up talking more
>turns out we have a common taste in music
>we end up talking more
>ask what other boards she browses
>she says r9k
>wtf
>explains her autism
>we get pretty close and skype each other frequently
>shes seriously addicted to this one my bloody valentine album
>literally every time we call she is playing it
>non stop
>one time she calls me
>shes being weird and quiet
>cant hear a fucking word over the album
>c-can you...........
>ffs bitch spit it out
>show me your dick?
>get out bitch
>tell her to fuck off
>she gets angry
>says she'll flash her boobs if i cum for her
>wtf
>shes cute
>im a loser
>i may never see boobs like this in my life
>reluctantly agree
>i pull out my cock and start jacking it for her
>wtf am i doing
>she leans in closer to the computer
>wanking in front of a cute girl feels kinda good
>i cum lots
>ask to see tits

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>she looks away from camera and flashes me
>she does it so quickly i barely seem them
>wtf
>ask her to do it again
>she says no
>cunt
>she asks if i'll wank for her again
>i say i will
>she seems super happy about it
>wtf am i doing
>eventually we become sort of music cam buddies
>discussing music as i wank in front of her
>eventually everytime i want to wank i do it in front of her
>because shes literally always online
>probably because shes a fucking weirdo
>but she has the cutest voice when i wank
>little muffled noises of "uh" and "mm"
>one time shes ultra horny and wanks with me
>she keeps her pants on though
>wtf
>crazy bitch.
>she cums in her pants
>her face looked super cute when she came
>ask if shes gonna change them
>her autism kicks in

anyone lurking?

moar pls op

origishigydigginal

Im here op

Good story so far

>>35266916
GO ON NOW YOU FUCK! MORE!

>met a chick off soc
>turned out to be a jew who was a virgin
>got coffee
>she was interested in me and might have wanted guilt free sex
>stopped talking to her

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>um.. later she says
>what the fuck is with this bitch
>wears pants filled with cum
>plays same album over and over again
>i ask if shes autistic
>just stares at me
>she ends call
>that answers that
>shes doesnt answer my calls for a few days
>few days later she calls me
>long time no see
>she cuts to the shit
>says she wants to meet
>i dont know if i want to meet her
>she might try and kill me
>or worse
>but we agree to meet up
>only if she comes to me
>because im bored of life
>and want to meet this crazy cute shoegaze loving chick
>she lives in UK too
>she says she'll come to meet me

im writing the rest of it out now so it might take a while
lurkers post so i know you exist

I exist I'm unoriginally and want to hear moar

>>35267067
i'll be here, anon

Lurker reporting in

>angry that a girl sits in her own cum
back to 9fag

>>35267067
I'm here anon, keep postin.

>>35267067
Lurker reporting in, keep posting

>>35266779

This bitch better not be a lochness monster.

>>35267067
Girls do not ejaculate semen.

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>tfw you just got a cute fembot to come to your house
>feels good
>but she wont stop complaining
>says she never goes outside, scared of socializing
>says if i die or someone kidnaps her its my fault
>tell her i dont care
>but i know i should be worried
>nothing good can come from this
>deep down you know it
>i know it
>everybody knows it
>give her my address
>why
>few days pass
>waiting for her
>its raining
>says she outside the station but doesnt have an umbrella
>wtf
>its london why doesnt she have an umbrella
>says i have to come meet her at the station with an umbrella
>stupid cunt
>honestly, women.
>i walk to the station
>shes there
>totally fucking wet
>actually drenched
>and shes only wearing a fucking tshirt

>>35267067
Hurry!

i have the feeling this grill is going to be a trap

if I get bel air'd I swear op...

>>35267232
interested

oreganoyo

>>35266779
>the thread gets close to limit but milo refuses to give up and his posts skype

I've been on this site since 2009 and I have literally never seen this once.

My little autismo can't be this cute??!

>>35267276
>i have the feeling this grill is going to be a trap
god i fucking hope so. jealous enough to kill op rn

I'm 97% sure that it's going to be a trap.
C'mon, big money no whammies.

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>>35267232
(she texted me)

>a fucking my bloody valentine tshirt
>and flip flops
>and shorts
>in london
>in winter
>there are people staring at her, actually staring at her
>and she stinks
>sweaty cunt
>but girl sweat
>mhm
>shes standing there just looking at the floor
>just staring at her feet in the rain
>she is actually autistic
>i have to walk up to her because her hair is covering her face
>stand in front of her for about two minutes
>shes completely still
>tempted to just walk away
>leave her here
>forget she even existed
>about to just do it
>oh, hi anon
>she knew i was there
>i ask her what the fuck is wrong with her
>looks up and pulls her hair back
>her face is bright red
>likes shes been crying

>>35267399
wat. am confuse.

>>35267399
Too many useless details, i'm almost bored. Apply yourself make us have a boner dude!

>tfw no qt smelly neet girl to take care of
FUCK YOU OP

>>35267399

>London
>My Bloody Valentine

This is one giant shitpost, possibly by a female lurker

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>27 kv the loneliness finally to much
>use every app possible to try and meet a girl
>only single mothers and land whales as far as the eye can see
>check /soc/
>live in a small canada town rarely any posts specially from girls
>see a transexual that was born a girl and lifts
>notbad.jpg
>reply to them with a pic and my kik
>we both hate texting and meet
>find out they are in a open relationship and she uses tumblr
>disregard red flags and proceed on
>2nd time we hang out in my basement smoke weed cuddle and she puts my penis in her mouth
>i cant stay erect from years of pornography abuse
>we hang out about 9 times like this until she tells me shes trying monogamy with her partner
>tfw ill never have this again with anyone

>>35267226
And bataman does not eat natchoes

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>>35267399
Hurry up OP, this faggot
>>35267486
is trying to hijack your thread

yeah with a guy.
we sometimes hang out and drink.
no gay shit like most of these other faggots

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>feel a bit bad
>say sorry
>she says its okay
>we go home
>ask her why shes dressed like that
>she says she only wears that tshirt and that everything else is comfy
>okay. whatever
>she isnt talking. just answering my questions
>doesnt even care about the umbrella
>she walks like a weirdo
>takes big random steps and jumps in puddles
>like a little girl
>its cute
>i ask her again if shes autistic
>she stops walking
>punches me
>right in the stomach
>FUCK
>it hurts
>like, a lot.
>realize the whole autism thing is a no go
>we get back to my place
>ask if she wants a towel
>she says yes, please
>polite little bitch
>give her a towel
>kicks off flip flops
>hit the wall and mark it
>wtf bitch
>she ignores me
>instead she just dries her feet with the towel
>spends like a minute just rubbing the towel on her feet
>shes giggling
>shes tickling herself
>autistic girls
>not once

>op literally finds a real anime girl and has the gall to complain

>>35267553
>tfw no autistic /r9k/ and /mu/ browsing gf

>>35267612
Had this once

Not as cool as it sounds

>>35267628
You're not op, fuck off

>>35267628
why not that sounds pretty perfect to me

I refuse to believe a girl this perfect exists

>>35267653
he never said he was op u fucknut

>>35267553
Fuck, I think I have a fetish for autistic girls now.

NO FEMALES/TRAPS IN THE STATE ON KENTUCKY THAT EVEN VISIT 4CHAN!!!!!!
>THERE ARE 3 GUYS ON /x/ AND 1 GUY ON /soc/ THAT ARE IN KY BUT NOT IN LOUISVILLE

GIMMI A GF!

>>35267655
They are very very sketchy.

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>>35267678
Neither did I.

Origami comment for the origami-god

>>35267669
He is full of shit, you do realize that right?

>>35267553
>>she stops walking
>>punches me
>>right in the stomach
>>FUCK
>>it hurts
Here you lost all credibility you moron, life is not your average japanese anime.

>>35267730
OP you've been called out, I believe this as well

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>>35267553
are you done or is there more? if that was it, the payoff was pretty weak.

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>>35267730
dude this wasnt some little girly punch. it fucking hurt

>are you okay?
>she looks up like she doesnt know where the fuck she is
>passes me the towel
>nice. sweaty feet towel
>milo, do you wanna listen to music
>my name isnt milo
>what the actual fuck
>i've been talking to her for weeks
>and i dont even know her name
>what is your name then?
>lizzy
>it fits her
>alright lizzy, what do you want to do?
>um....
>do you have any food?
>take her to kitchen
>shes looking in my fridge
>says she can have a beer if she likes
>she says beer makes her pee
>cute
>she asks if there is a mcdonalds
>not in my fridge, no
>thump
>she hits me again
>wtf
>i want a mcdonalds NOW
>wtf lizzy
>chill
>say there isnt a mcdonalds for like a mile
>she falls to the ground
>and starts screaming
>like a fucking banshee
>tell her to shut up
>she wont shup up
>it gets louder
>fine, i say
>i'll get you a mcdonalds
>fucking women.

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>>35267730
>>35267743
If you expect greentexts to be realistic or... well.. real, then you're a bit of a newfriend.

>>35267727
>I refuse to believe this

>you know this is bullshit right?

hmm do I or don't I its a mystery

>i was 16, posted a pic of my bush to a redhead thread on /b/
>added 2 dudes on skype
>talked to them both for hours at a time, in my bathroom until 4am
>start to develop 'feelings' for one guy

looking back i was in a shitty place and i think just enjoyed knowing that someone cared about me, but i did end up truly loving him (as much as 16yo me could)

>he was 22, lived with him mum 200miles away, 6ft 5, like 300lbs
>he sends me a chain with padlock for me to wear, I asked for it
>my parents dont like the idea of him at all, obviously
>agree that he can visit me for a few days, staying out of the house
>he comes over, we're only allowed to hang out in the living room/ 'public spaces' in the house
>fuck him in my school uniform on the couch, so much regret
>eventually they take away my phone, any access to internet in order to get me to dump him
>"BUT I LOVE HIM REEEEE" haha
>school trip to london, we have an hour of free time so he meets me and I get in trouble for returning to the group late
>one of my friends told teachers what i was up to
>trouble ensues

In my final months of school he's begging me to move down with him (and mum), to go to a shit college and to completely cut my family out of my life. I eventually realise how dumb this all is and have to write him a letter to break up with him.

>first day of uni, I skype him in the hopes of giving him closure
>he threatens to kill himself, I tell him I know he wont and its incredibly fucked up to say that
>2 weeks later he prank calls me in a dumb voice, "FIDDLE DEE DEE YOUNG LAYDEE..." some other weird shit and I call him out on it
>never heard of him again

dont date /b/tards

>>35267694
>Louisville
You think that's bad dude? Try living in the eastern part of the state. There's literally no girls in my area on tinder that arn't atleast an hour drive away.

>>35267759
Nice filename dude!

>>35266779
>met up
>fucked
NORMIE GET OUT REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

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>>35267801
Ecks dee.
origano originoli

>>2 weeks later he prank calls me in a dumb voice, "FIDDLE DEE DEE YOUNG LAYDEE...

Wtf lmao

>>35267777
You are a piece of trash, and you always will be.

>>35267941
yeah I dodged a bullet on that one, didn't take me long to figure out who it was

>>35267970
thx senpai, same 2 u :^)

>>35267777
please post your gay love stories on /lgbt/ if you are not a cute trap

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>go to mcdonalds
>she didnt even tell me what she wanted
>just get her the big mac meal and a banana milkshake
>walk home again
>outside door
>shes playing my bloody valentine
>really fucking loud
>so loud i can hear it from outside in the rain
>that'll piss of the neighbours for sure
>open the door
>shes in the living room
>asleep on the sofa
>how is she asleep with such loud music
>what is wrong with her
>she must have been dropped as a baby
>for sure
>maybe drop kicked
>dont want to wake her up
>shes cute and drooling on my floor
>but im not letting this big mac go to waste
>turn down music
>whisper in her ear
>nothing
>end up having to shake her violently to wake her up
>hand her big mac meal
>she doesnt even say thank you
>rude bitch
>and she eats so slowly
>even though its probably already cold
>finishes meal
>goes back to sleep
>i start to get the feeling shes just gonna use me and live with me for the rest of my life

>>35267797
i tried tindr and still get nothing.
the other dating apps just have the same people as the last dating app.
>those girls that show their whatever but have no hook-ups/etc in their bio
not even sure how to talk to females online when dating because they do not want the same one-liners or anything corny.

>>35267758
f a k e stop the fake story you fucking dumbass

>>35267777
This is the sort of post that I'm going to remember for years and each time I remember it, I'll feel bad for the rest of the day. Thanks a lot.

>I will never take a young schoolgirl's virginity while she wears her school uniform

>>35268198
You're an idiot. Even if it's fake, it's entertainment at this point. Literally every story on the internet can be made up, you give people the benefit of doubt though.

I want to read this, and I'm sure other people want to. If you don't want to read it, you intolerant little brainlet, browse the fuck off and go shitpost on another thread.

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>i dont know anything about this girl
>her name might not even be lizzy
>all i know is she really likes my bloody valentine
>fair enough
>a few hours go by
>lizzy wakes up
>she says hi
>i say hi
>she wants to use the computer
>fine
>let her on the computer and i play ps4
>while im playing ps4 im watching what shes doing
>shes sitting in a weird fucking position, with her feet up on the desk and body lurched over the keyboard
>rocking her body back and force towards the screen
>looks like a retard
>most of the time shes on /mu/ or reading some manga or on websites i dont recognize
>but i can see this one manga shes reading
>its a hentai
>wtf
>shes reading hentai
>a girl is reading hentai in my room
>how did this even happen
>ask her jokingly what shes reading
>she kind of flinches when i ask
>like a little jump
>and she ignores me
>i ask her again
>she says its nothing
>i tell her it looks like hentai

Pretty sure this is one giant shot post but I am invested so fuck it.

>>35268255
how did that take 11 minutes?

>>35268204
i dunno man i think it sucked for him, my parents despised him and we only got to hang out 4 times in 2 years

the sex was bad too, if that's any help

>>35267067
Go on
Tortellini

>>35268332
Can I have your contact info? Just want to be friends, I'm not romantically interested in non-virgins

>>35268322
dont disparage op

>>35268381
I would but I'm shit at keeping online friends, I'll only end up ghosting you after a couple of weeks anyway

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>>35266779
The fake stories are always the best. But, uh keep going pls

>>35267067
I love dead dead demons so much I can never find anyone eke who does.

keep going OP this is like watching chuunibyou in retard greentext form

>>35268426
That's fine with me, give me your contact info please

>>35268493
my kik is benicetokittens55 then, but dont say i didnt warn you

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>she gets out of the chair
>fuck
>dont hit me
>but she doesnt hit me
>instead she crawls on the sofa next to me
>and sits next to me
>i can see shes staring at me
>its making me uncomfortable
>i just wanna play gta
>she gets in close
>starts blowing my ear
>why
>i tell her i know shes there
>keeps blowing
>tell her to stop, its making me uncomfortable
>but its not
>in fact its the opposite
>im getting a hard on
>whats worse is that shes changed her posistion and is now kinda awkwardly sitting half on the sofa half on my lap
>but her feet are around my cock
>dont touch
>dont touch
>shes still blowing
>and she starts kicking my cock
>fuck
>she keeps blowing harder until shes basically spitting in my ear
>put controller down
>turn to her
>shes super close
>ask her
>what do you want
>she stops
>thinks about it
>then says;
>"cummies."

inb4 it was the loch ness monster trying to get tree fiddy the whole time

>>35268534
Oh nvm, I don't have kik because I don't even have a phone.

You can add me on Skype if you want, my username is ahrepna6. I'm leaving the thread now.

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>>35268550
CUMMIES
AGAHAH

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>>35268550

>what do you want
>"cummies"

Kekked, one of the better troll greentexts i have seen here.

>>35268550

I could have sort of believed you before, but now you fucked up.

>>35267612

Same feel. I think that only someone as much of an autistic fuck like me could get along with me in a relationship.

>>35268550
You met Eliza? Fuck bro, gross!

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>wtf
>cummies?
>she wants cummies
>she wants me to cum for her
>tfw she wants the cummies
>i want confirmation, ask
>what are cummies?
>she looks excited
>i want...
>y'know
>i want the cummies, anon
>she starts kicking my cock again
>so she noticed
>please anon
>shes being more vocal than ever before
>i want cummies
>shes kicking harder
>i need cummies now anon.....
>she starts nibbling on my ear
>everytime she does she pulls back and bites her lip and looks at me
>cummies anon...
>now she grabs my dick
>show me where the cummies cum from
>okay lizzy
>i will show u where the cummies cum from
>i whip out my cock
>oh my god anon its even bigger in person
>i know, right?
>can i...
>can i touch it?
>wow.. i've never seen a cummy machine in real life
>bless
>how cute
>sure, lizzy, touch it all you like.
>oh wow anon, its kinda sticky... LOL
>she literally says LOL irl
>but a cute autistic girl is stroking my cock
>i dont care about anything anymore

>>35267700

Nice vague answer retard faggot

loch ness monster?

"about tree fiddy?"

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>i want to suck it, anon
>go for it lizzy
>starts sucking my cock
>literally sucking
>like shes henry the hoover or some shit
>it feels good tho
>vroooooooom
>she lies on her stomach and kicks her feet backwards and forwards
>vrooooooooom
>my dick feels rly good
>more cummies anon, more!
>show me the cummies!
>i want cummies NOW!
>i want to see something of yours, lizzy
>her face turns red
>d-dont think im weird, okay?
>you're my beautiful cummy sister, lizzy.
>i will never call you weird or autistic again.
>crawls backwards
>takes off her shorts
>about to take off her pants
>stops
>gets up
>goes to the amp
>turns my bloody valentine all the way up
>deafening
>ARE YOU READY ANON?
>FOR WHAT?
>SHE TAKES OFF HER PANTS

>>35268879
>>you're my beautiful cummy sister, lizzy.
what

>tfw no beautiful cummy sister trap gf

You need to type this shit out beforehand next time

>>35268879
>every pic is manga

10/10 best autistic fantasy

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>>35268879
plz be a cute trap

>>35268879
And reveals her ten inch titan

>>35268953
Or not just stop when he feels like it and actually hit text limit

>>35269112
anon, good storytelling is about pacing and knowing where to leave the next break so that the reaser wants more :^)

>>35269201
0/10 ending. Had potential but you ruined it all.

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>>35269201
you fucked it up m8

>>35269201
nice story op i liked it

>>35269378
Wait how did it end he deleted my curiosity is unsatisfied

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>>35269533
He ended it magnificently.

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How old is lizzy and u OP, i imagine she is a real life neet loli with autism

FUCK I MISSED THE ENDING

WHO SCREENSHOTTED

OP DELETED IT REEEEEEEEEEEEE

>>35266779
>posting on /b/ in 2013
>thread is about LSD
>start talking about a tab a i bought
>this print of tab was exclusive to my particular part of scotland so another anon starts replying
>we realise we're from the same town
>he types his initials and i type mine
>turns out we were a year apart in highschool
>message me on facebook
>chat shit about 4chin
>end up going to his house
>we snort horse tranquilliser and drink cider
>was pretty gud

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>>35269668
>FUCK I MISSED THE ENDING
>WHO SCREENSHOTTED
>OP DELETED IT REEEEEEEEEEEEE
fdgdg

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>>35269668
>>35269533
This was the end:

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>>35269668
enjoy the let down

Wow, I guess I shouldn't have expected any better from a robot.

>>35269736
That was the fucking ending?

I literally copypasta'd that shit to my irl GC in messenger wtf

OP YOU'RE A FAGGOT

>>35269739
Wait, that wasn't just someone trolling?

>>35269715
eyyyy a scotfag

>>35269785
It's the same trip as the guy who started the story

>>35269737
What a faggot op

Oragamioreo

@ OP for deleting useless post

CUMMIES ANON! OH SO MANY CUMMIES! ALL OVER BROTHERS FACE, TEEHEE! SO MANY CUMMIES. I WANT BROTHERS CUMMIES IN MILOS LITTLE PUSSY, TEEHEE.FILL ME UP ANON! UGH I LOVE UR CUMMIES. I WANT CUMMIES. GIMME MORE! MORE CUMMIES! SO TASTY, WOW YOUR CUMMIES NEVEREND. WOW ANON, SO MUCH CUMMIES, ALL OVER THE WALLS, TEEHEE! OH MY SO MUCH CUMMY EVERYWHERE! ON MY FACE ANON, SLATHER MY FACE IN UR CUMMIES BROTHER! TEEHEE! OH I LOVE CUMMIES OH SO MUCH! CUMMY CUM CUM! FILL MY BUM WITH UR CUM! TEEHEE. OH WOW, OH WOW WOW WOW. ITS.. EVERYWHERE. IM DROWNIND IN UR STICKY MAN CUMMIES. TEEHEE. DONT STOP ANON! FILL ME WITH YOUR YUMMY CUMMY MAKE UR CUMMY SISTER PREGGOS. TEEHEE! I WANT TO LIVE OFF UR CUMMIES, ANON, THEY TASTE TO SWEET? DADDYS CUMMIES DADDYS CUMMIES, I LOVE MY DADDYS CUMMIES! GLUG GLUG. YUMMY NUTRITIONAL CUMMYS. VROOOOOOOOM IM GONNA SUCK UP ALL THE EXCESS CUMMYS FROM THE FLOOR. VROOOOOOOM. WOW IM SO FULL OF CUMMYS, BUT I WANT MORE, ANON! I WILL POO OUT THE CUMMYS AND THEN EAT THEM UP AGAIN. TEEHEE@ I LOVE YOUR CUMMYS SO MUCH ANON, THEY MAKE ME REALLY HAPPY! OH ANON, DUMMY, DONT FORCE IT OUT, LET ME SUCK IT OUT FOR YOU. VROOOOOOOOM. WOW ANON, SO MUCH CUMMIES THIS TIME! TEEHEE. I THINK MY TUMMY IS ABOUT TO BLOW. WAAAAAAAAAAAH. NO MORE CUMMYS NOW. PLEASE NO MORE CUMMYS. NO ANON I DONT WANT THE CUMMYS. ANON STOP. NO MORE CUMMYS ANON NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO MORE CUMMYS ANON MY TUMMY IS ABOUT TO BLOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW UUUPPPPPPPPPPPP

An hero yourself, op

I didn't expect this ending, nor for it to be deleted, nor for it to be posted again so soon.

>>35269816
Can confirm this was op's last post. story got boring towards end and then.... this.

>>35269791
awrite pal where ye fae north lanarkshire master race reporting

>>35266779
jesus christ OP you're unbearably obnoxious I can't even finish your shitty story

>>35269801
Oh yeah, I see it now, although as soon as the word "cummies" was used, a huge red light went off in my head, so I guess this shouldn't be too unexpected.

>>35267067

Girls don't "cum" OP, you're a retard.

>>35268550

This is fucking bullshit lmao. Thanks for the laught though OP.

>>35267292
Bullshit. I post my info if I get triggered enough bruh