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Name some robot things you've done, if you dare?
>Be in long term relationship, go over to random qt red head and try to flirt
>Whip out a banana and ask for her wallet
>Talk to cutest girl I could find in Highschool
>Post on /adv/ whilst talking to her
>They think I'm trolling, say things like
>'This is like my Chinese cartoons'
>'Jesus christ people like OP exist, I understand why women can be misandrists'
>They tell me to say mean things, I do
>Fast forward 3 years, still casually harassing her and her sister when I get high on opiods
>Last weekend my brothers friends are doing lines of MDMA
>I get bored, go get the firehose and turn it on them
>I wasn't even on drugs
>Have friend named Andrew, Jap
>Browses /r9k regularly
>Tells me 'Mental illnesses aren't things to collect, Mr Anon'
>My nickname is autist
>I get on all fours naked with the lads, I scream, do flips and act like gollum rub my dick on mates
>Try kill self, get free psychologist because Dad was in Vietnam
>'You have Aspergers'
>Went to lazer tag birthday party
>Was given cake, felt sick handed it to random girl, no words
>went home, got on facebook for the event and found her profile
>Stalked to see if I would bang
>'Hello cake lady' I said
>worked
>Long term relationship with cake lady
>Move interstate with her, she got into WAAPA in Perth
>Join /pol/
>'Babe come cuddle me'
>Haha, yeah in a second, I'm watching Trump
>Go to bed, 'Did you know Trump did this anonette?
>'Hillary is crooked, she killed Vince Foster'
>'Shut the fuck up'
>I don't
>break up
>Have no friends
>Brother is C.H.A.D
>Banged two girls at once in my old bed while my parents were asleep
>Rides street bike
>Good social skill, becomes drug dealer
>Buys weed cheap and sells for $150 dollar profit per ounce
>Start buying weed myself without him knowing
>Steal a few of his clients and sell them weed $100 cheaper solely for human interaction
>These people would rob me if they knew I was doing this on my own
>>
Currently
>Sit in room alone all day
>Afraid to leave the house during the day
>Waiting for one of his clients to message me for cheap drugs
>Last week one of them was leaning in my car window
>"hey how are you'
>'good where's the weed'
>Yeah I'm doing alright, so hear any funny stories lately'
>"What?'
>'haha yeah here's your weed have a good one
>Yeah
>Use the money I made to buy $200 worth of Broccoli chips
>I like the crunch of them
>Supposed to be studying at university
>Entirely missed the first week, too afraid to leave the house
>>
>Talking to my psychologist
>I tell her about Juanita Broadderick
>She doesn't care
>Tell her about Vince Foster, nothing.
>Kinda jerked off to the thought of her once.
>Contemplating opening the floodgates of my autism on her feeble Stacy brain
>At gym with r9k buddy
>We just got oreo shakes
>I say hol up, I'm going to spit out this stuff
>Go to bathroom to vomit it up
>He gets mad at me
>R9k bud thinks there is a ghost in his house
>Constant weird happenings in his door and strange noise
>Tell him it's nothing, we go and smoke DMT out near the beach
>He gets really fucked up and sees a hospital in a dream
>I got fucked up and everything looked like a Nintendo game
>When he's vulnerable I tell him I was the ghost for the past week
>Tell him I also might not be
>He gets really mad
>He tells me he wants to hear more about me
>To know what makes me tick
>He also dissected a cat as a kid
>we casually joke about him killing me
>I reveal that whenever we played Dungeons and Dragons and I brought cheese
>It was stolen because I was poor
>The place i hid the cheese was on my dick
>He gets mad at eating my free pants food
>I didn't even realize it was wrong
>>
>Be in highschool
>Never talk to anyone
>Manage to break up brother Chad and his gf
>He gets mad and tells the school I finger the family dog with vegemite
>They all accept this as fact
>Social pariah
>>
Fucking auscunts, man
You deserve every negative aspect of your life
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