Fuck no, please do not do it, you are my only fucking friend,

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cont
fucking original man don't do this to me right now

>>35211349
>>35211359
do you have his phone number or his address? if it's his real facebook call 911

>>35211386
I'm calling her right fucking now, just woke up it's 6 am now she hasn't been active since these last messages

rest in piss normie bitch

>>35211405
No one gives a shit about your roaster friend. I hope she does just because you came here seeking attention like a faggot.

>>35211405
A lot of the time these suicide attempts end in failure or somebody they live with finds out, I'm sure she's fine. Do you have her real facebook? can you find her family members or friends on facebook?

>>35211405
>her
Ah ok

An attention-seeker

>>35211405
>her
>she

I hope the roastie did off herself

Praying she goes through with it.

But she won't. Why would a girl commit suicide? I'm sure she's loving the attention you're giving her though

>>35211405
>>35211416
>>35211430
>>35211444
>>35211450
>>35211457
>tone changes immediately as it's revealed to be a girl

never change r9k

>>35211349
>Friend is about to kill himself
>I know, I'll beg him not to do it on a mongolian basket weaving forum

You should kill yourself too OP

>>35211349
>>35211359
>>35211405
Remind her when it's all over that there's no such thing as an attempted suicide.

I once told this dumb highschool roastie who tried to get me to orbit her that when she tried this shit on me.
She downed a buncha pills that couldn't kill her and got her stomach pumped.


How the fuck do you fail to kill yourself, I mean, you must be a fucking failure at everything if you can't even get that right.

I love how she said "attempt suicide". Implying that it's not going to work. If someone seriously wants to kill themselves they'll do it.

She'll be back OP, keep giving her the attention she wants you faggot friendzoned cuck

Just fuck all of you, please be nice for once, she eventually answered and I could hear her mumbling and puking, this is my only friend, I called an ambulance to her house and alerted her parents and I'm waiting for a bus to go to the hospital, I'm scared shitless please for once help me, has anyone had similar experiences what the fuck should I do I DONT WANT TO LOSE ANOTHER PERSON

>>35211644
Maybe if you weren't such an attention-whoring faggot people you care for wouldn't kill themselves?

>>35211626
I couldn't care less if I'm friendzoned, I have never wanted anything more, she as well is autistic as all fuck and frequents r9k a lot, that's how we fucking met you cucks, both of us haven't left our houses for anything other than education until she suggested we meet up in a park and have spent all our free time since then going out in that park. Fuck all of you, fembots do fucking exist, and I care about this retarded autistic antisocial piece of shit too fucking much

>>35211489

t. never read suicide statistics

>>35211644
You aren't responsible for her, stop worrying over some dumb attention whore's attempt at "suicide"

>>35211349
I hope rusty attenshun seeker ded kek

>>35211349
Who the hell are you talking to you Mongolian bastard child.

>>35211349
women don't kill themselves, they only try to. You have nothing to worry about

>>35211626
sometimes they become paralyzed or a vegetable which is worse

This thread is great. Post pics OP.

"I couldn't care less if I'm friendzoned"

Kekekekekekekek

>>35211844
"I never wanted anything more"

Lelelelelelelelelelelel

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>>35211820
I'm in the waiting room at the hospital

>>35211878
See, OP?
If she wanted to kill herself, she wouldn't warn you, she'd, at most, leave a note for you to find after she was long gone.

This is just basic attentionwhoring.

>>35211349
Anyone who seriously wanted to kill themselves wouldn't tell anyone.

have you atleast fucked her yet?

>>35211878
Have fun babysitting the suicidal roastie, and expect to be doing this again in the future kek

>>35211878
You're the one who should be killing themselves, fucking loser orbiter.

>>35211922
yeah dog this guy knows whats up

>>35211878
Top kek you fucking beta

>>35211349
OP Since it's a girl she likely is just crying for attention and didn't take a lethal means of suicide because she actually doesnt want to die.

also

>friend sends suicide letter
>First thing you do is post on /r9k/ about it
hmm

>>35211878
I meant post pics of her for fapping purposes. But this is good too. It's like an interactive teenage drama.

>buys into her attention seeking fake story
>drives to a hospital and waits for her

"Thanks for being such a great friend anon" hahahaha lmaoing @ your life fag

>>35211878
Are those bars so people don't try to suicide off the stairs? Is that a suicide ward? Shouldn't the suicide ward be the morgue?
That must be the attention ward.

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>>35211996
Great post sir

You cunts are actually fucking right. You know fuck this, it's the second time this has happened if she really wanted to go she'd just blow her fucking brains but for the second fucking time she is trying to OD on bullshit. If she makes it through this next time I see her I'll fucking strangle her myself, I'm fucking pissed. No matter how nice you think they are never get attached to a legal autist, I'm diagnosed with a mild schizoaffective disorder but I'm taking my meds regularly and can't control it, she is biporal, shit is insane, I think I'm finally thinking straight, I hope she survives so I can bash her fucking skull in

>>35212040
Punished OP

>>35212040
if you rape her she might actually go through with it for once.

>>35212040
yea right beta faggot, youre gonna tell her how much youre glad she's alive then be right by her side for anything she needs. why dont you go ahead and off YOURself bud?

>>35211878
>not a morgue
it's another /r9k/ was 100% right about women episode! weee!

Nice to see OP thinking straight, good on you man, begging her to not do it (even though you know full well she won't) for what? To be called a "great friend"?

Don't be keep being a cuck OP

>>35212040
>Implying you're OP

Little faggots like OP don't just turn 360 degrees and walk away like that. They get taken advantage of and used for ueats on end without doing anything about it until they snap.

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>>35212086
Another pic of waiting room, I'm OP, I've thought about this a lot but I was in a shock this morning, I'm calming down and starting to think straight, fuck this shit, I liked necrophilia in the first place

>>35212131
glad you finally came to your senses OP

>>35212131
See how far you can throw your shoes. Post results.

>>35212131
Why dont you show her how a pro does it
Thatll show her

>>35211349
>I shall attempt suicide
If you really wanted to die you would do everything to stay dead
You wouldn't say 'attempt' suicide
And you shouldn't text people so they wouldn't come to save you
Bitch is looking for attention

>>35212237
That guy who turns up late and doesn't read the thread

>Did I miss anything?

You missed everything.

>>35211711
Asocial*
antisocial means your violent

>>35211405
>attempt suicide

What a retarded normie bitch. Anyone who strait up "attempts" suicide and talks about it just wants loads of attention for their special snowflake fake mental illness. People who really want to do die don't tell anyone for years until they actually commit suicide.

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OP, just so you know, if she actually expected to die then she would not have told you she was committing suicide.
If I wanted to kill myself, why would I tell all my friends saying "oh guys I'm killing myself lol" and wait for their responses of them grieving going "OH GOD NO ANON NO"
If I wanted to kill myself I'd die without letting anyone know so I don't have to see my friends texting me how upset they are while I put a gun in my mouth.
I know SO many girls who tried killing themselves by trying to OD on pills. Guess what, they did not die. They went to the mental hospital for a few days and then came back and were fine. They got tons of friends to text them and love them and when they came back people hugged them and gave plenty of support so they can feel good about themselves.

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>>35211405
>I'm calling her right fucking now
>her

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beta males were a mistake.

>>35212758
what a wonderful ass.

>>35211405
this is why english is a shit tier language. Why the fuck doesnt it have gendered articles or words. No way to tell unless specified.
Because of that I wasted my time on this thread

>>35211349
Bid him farewell, its selfish of you to want to keep a pained man like him alive jist because it makes you feel good. Its almost like thats all he means to you, that he isnt his own person. Although i dont know if hes doing it over something petty

>>35212815
good point.
english is sterile programming launguage for humans. everything sound cringy.

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>>35211349
Dude, I'd jump at the chance to commit suicide if I saw a clear path, but if someone told me what you just said I'd probably reconsider, and definitely stick around for a little while longer. Just say exactly what you did in the OP.

>>35212815
>It's a girl so suddenly it's not that important

I know you guys really don't want to be white knights, but come the fuck on.

>>35211986
has anyone ever just not answered and just called the cops to her place

I would love the see a roastie breakdown due to this

>>35211516
>How the fuck do you fail to kill yourself, I mean, you must be a fucking failure at everything if you can't even get that right.

Did you not hear about the guy from Malcolm in the Middle? He shot himself point-blank in the head; the bullet came out the other end and he still lived. Suicide is not as easy as you think.

It's OP, she survived, you cunts really helped me open up my third eye, there are way easier and safer ways to end your life and texting me is just a pathetic call for attention, I'm dumb for doing what I have already done, I'll just go home and be done with real people. They're too much of a fucking nuisance and I'm autistic for falling for the "friends" meme. Every single person in your life is just using you to boost their ego, real care does not exist. Fuck that cunt, next time she texts me that she wants to die I'll show up at her fucking doorstep holding a 12 gauge.

>>35212921
What an idiot, everyone knows that you're supposed to put the barrel in your mouth and point at the brain. It's still possible to fuck up that way, but much harder, especially if you use a shotgun.

>>35212941
I can help you open up your third eye if you know what I mean famalam

>>35212941
dude I knew the moment I read the "Yeah"

just let that go through your skull the bitch wrote this down then went "Yeah" like she was looking at it again seeing that it sounded right

then came the bullshit about "promise me you'll be ok" if this doesn't read like narcissists movie-tier suicide attempt I don't know what to tell you

>>35212131
>filename
hmm..

>>35212960
Girls on /r9k/ are all mentally ill attention whores and you should not bother with them no matter how "different" they seem. I hope this is a good lesson for anyone lurking this thread.

>>35212960
In America they'll do their best to keep you alive so they can collect that sweet $40,000 hospital bill. Now you're broke and you've probably lost the faculties for another suicide attempt. I'm not going to underestimate the miracles of modern medicine so easily.

Exit bag is best, but also risky if you let someone find you. I'm thinking I'd either let myself get hit by a train, or lie on the tracks and shoot myself and then get hit by a train. I don't give a fuck about the mess.

>>35211644
>vomiting
Oh look, its another woman not actually going to kill themselves because they couldn't even find the care to actually get a working method (overdose is 10%)

Its called a suicidal gesture op, thats what happened. You got emotionally cucked by a roast

>>35212979
Exactly, looking back at it it's really vague and plain dumb, no real emotion in it or anything
What a fucking piece of shit

>>35212131
>mfw this is all b8 and a fabricated story to help r9k get back on its feet
Good job op either way

>>35212815
I don't understand what you mean about English.

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>>35211516
>How the fuck do you fail to kill yourself, I mean, you must be a fucking failure at everything if you can't even get that right.

>>35211405
Beta orbiter lmao

Die cuck

>>35212738
Is that a wizard from the future?

Notice that she said "attempt suicide" and not "commit suicide" or "kill myself"

That's the difference between men and women; the former do it because life is a bitch, the latter does it for attention. If honor is a male quality, then women need to get back in touch with morality

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>Telling somebody you're going to kill yourself before the act
Attention seeking whore lads.

>>35214176
yeah, you should tell it after the fact
fucking whore pussies

>>35214176
She didn't even say she'd kill herself, she said "attempt suicide". She really doesn't intend to die and can barely hide that fact

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>>35212941
>OP starts off as a faggot
>ends based
Wasn't expecting this, good job OP

>>35214494
You dense mother fucker.

Sort your shit out

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>>35215569
>Sort your shit out
What? What did I do wrong?

>>35214153
I see the point you're making, but this is probably due to a conventional choice of wording. Women all talk the same shit using the same dumb phrases, it hurts the eyes to even read their trash. men do this too and write without thinking precisely what they say, but only a women can produce sentences filled with platitudes like

>I have thought about settling down after I turned 32

it amazes the mind how they absolutely cannot express this in a different way using different vocabulary

>>35212738
Can someone photoshop George Lucas' head on his body

Thanks

>>35211349

key word attempt

ignore this OP

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>>35212941
>>35212941
>next time she texts me that she wants to die I'll show up at her fucking doorstep holding a 12 gauge.

YEA GUYS SHES SO PATHETIC FOR WANTING ATTENTION. SHES SO PATHETIC FOR BEING ALONE. KILL HER!

I don't think all you retards deserve to be alone because of how retarded this logic is.

You guys are railing on a girl who has the exact same attributes you all claim to struggle with too? Why? I mean if your willing to kill someone:
>I'll show up at her fucking doorstep holding a 12 gauge.

As a girl I'm sure you'd be way more prone than this for cries of attention.

You act above an action based on low self-esteem and desperation but immediately act violently towards it. I seriously can not comprehend what level of irony/memeing you autists are on but I'd be willing to believe most of you are very low functionally mentally impaired.

>>35211405
>her
Oh great it's fucking nothing.

>>35216239
>This formatting
Roastspeak is fucking indecipherable.

>>35216239
>I don't think all you retards deserve to be alone
Thanks? I guess?

>>35211489
>le never change reddit XDD

F U C K OFF YOU FAGGOT

>>35211405
>her
Dropped. Dumb roastie is probably just craving for attention, she will be back to ignoring you in no time so there is no need to worry for her safety. I wish she would deliver though.

>>35211644
>dumb whore says she will kill herself
>doesn't
Stop the presses. She will probably go on about how she "tried to kill herself" when she at most took one or two pills too many or even better tried to "slash her wrists". She had no intention of dying.

>>35216579
This is why I can't have sympathy for women. They always have these made-up stories about made-up problems like how they 'attempted suicide' or how they were 'molested' and every single time it's the same. Made up, exaggerated bullshit. Literally every time. I can't take it seriously when they say they have 'problems' or 'oh my past is soo fcked up I'm toootally not a normalslag not like the other girls teehee.'

Most of the time they're so fucking stupid they actually believe their own lies it's ridiculousl

>>35212131
Record yourself raping her, run to your house to post here and then prepare for prison

>>35211405
women statistically don't actually kill themselves. men do.

>>35211405
>her
Audibly laughed, fucking cuck.

>>35211349

Simple, if she sehnt this message, she most likely is an attention whore who ain't serious about killing herself.
Lend her a collected ear, or if you're really crippled with depression, join her, have some fun and then depart from this world along with her.

How fucking worthless can a person be? Stupid whore literally manipulated you into giving her attention. Hope she kills herself for good one day, or even better, gets killed by someone else for being such a piece of shit.

How embarrassing.
Man I'm glad I didn't tell anybody before any of my pussy ass suicide attempts.
I'd just limp home or wash the puke off of myself after fucking up.

>>35211721
This. Girls threaten it for attention. Guys actually go through with it

>>35216239
Difference is women make up the vast majority of "attempted" suicides but men make up 75-80% of the SUCCESSFUL suicides. Implying the former is for attention and the latter is for results, generally.

Therefore, it is not unreasonable to be skeptical of when some roastie texts you saying "I'm going to ATTEMPT suicide" and downs a bottle of pills rather then jumping off a bridge, throwing themselves into traffic or blowing their brains out, as a cry for attention rather then a genuine attempt.

People who attempt suicide for attention deserve no sympathy. It just so happens that it's mostly women.

So stfu roastie, and get the fuck off my board.

>>35216579
People who really want to die know how to do it and do it well. They know throwing themselves into highway traffic, or in front of a train, or off a bridge, or eating a bullet will get the job done. The ones who down pills or cut their wrists (admittedly I did this as a male, but did it for the physical pain rather then a suicide attempt) are doing it just for attention.

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>>35212131
good job OP, make it slow and painfull

>>35211405
>her
Haha nvm hope she dies

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>it's another "/r9k/ was right" episode

I don't know if I should feel happy, depressed, or validated.

>>35214060
nice stolen seinfeld joke you cuck

>>35212862
Its weird as fuck to gender everything. If a language makes you cringe you might have autism.