Getting haircut today How do you guys get through the anxiety

>>34983865
Haven't had a haircut since november 2016.
Don't plan to get one any time soon

I just cut it myself.

>>34983902
Oh wow a whole 3 months...

>>34983865
Go to a barber who doesnt speak english

The lady I go to barely speaks English; it's perfect.

>>34983865
Just shave your head at home or get mommy to give you a bowl cut.

>getting your hair cut
>ever
It's not worth the hassle

>>34984009

yea well my hair looks disgusting long, it just poofs up

Where i live customers rarely talk. Is this an american thing?

>hate going to the hairdressers for this reason
>dont go for over a year
>look like shit
>finally decide to go
>hairdresser is an old man who just gets on with it and doesnt talk. He gives 1 or 2 word replies to normalfag questions
>he is also a really good hairdresser
>mfw ive found the dream hairdresser
>feelsgood.jpg

You must go to a wack barber. My barber's a black dude who just says "what's good man, what do you need today?" then just focuses on cutting my hair.

>>34983994
>Just shave your head at home

This. Unless you have an ugly mug, or your hair is your defining feature

>>34984118
It's worth going to a few places to find someone like this. I move around a lot and don't go through the hassle.

>>34984118
>hairdresser

only women call it that

>>34984207
Or people who aren't englishfags

>>34984207
they do? Im not american so maybe its different. Barber is an odd word and i dont like it. Where is it even derived from?

>>34984244

men in america call them, "haircutters" because we have testosterone in our systems

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>>34983865
Haircuts shouldn't be 20 minutes unless you're a faggot

>>34984391
thats just silly.

Its funny you should say that too because there is more estrogen in your milk and food than in europe.

i dunno about you but my barber doesnt talk to me when he cuts mine

Find a good barber who knows to say hello, ask what you want, then not talk to you. Simple.

>>34984163
>on /r9k/
>literally expects people here to not be ugly
kek

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>tfw mummy's qt hairdresser comes to our house and cuts my hair when I need it cut
>haven't been to an actual barber sharp for years

feels good man

>>34983865
Take ur mom and delegate small talk to her.
Problem solved.

>>34984537
>barber sharp

WHY CAN'T I DO ANYTHING RIGHT

>>34983865
wear a scarf, speak with a raspy voice, cough a little. the guy won't try to talk to you if you are sick and if he does just say, that it hurts to speak.

>>34984460

i dont drink cow tit puss

>>34983865

where the fuck do you people like that barbers are forced to small talk?

I've been to four different barbers over the span of a decade and have never, EVER had this problem. I just sit there, tell him how I want my hair and then just look straight ahead or take a nap if I'm feeling tired until he's done.

>>34984562
Because you're a failure, anon.

>>34983865
don't talk and give very short responses if questioned. They will take the hint

>>34984576

that sounds so ridiculous its like a comedy routine

>>34983865
you don't have to make small talk, I guess it depends on the barber. With my barber I just stay quiet for the whole 40 minutes and it's not awkward at all.

Try going to a barber with background noise, now that I notice it it's never awkward because there's always the background noise of the tv or of someone else talking, so you'd probably look fine staying quiet if there was any other source of noise.

>>34984537
Same here. Really feels good.
But I don't know what I should do when I move out. How do you ask for an haircut?

just sit still dipshit

>>34983865
bong here, I just talk about normie music with him. I just kinda grunt if he starts talking about football. it works.

last time we chatted about the benefits of being self employed. it was cool.

Gotta learn to stop being a meek faggot sometime. One day you'll be 40 and your caretakers will be dead. Stop eeking your way through life.

>>34984615
How the fuck does it take 40 minutes to cut your hair? I'm in and out in 15 tops.

Get her talking about herself. How long have you been a stylist? That kinda thing.

>>34984940

t. guy who has read articles on how to make small talk

that shit just makes you look autistic

I've got a polish geezer that cuts my hair, thank fuck he only speaks limited english other than ''tilt head back''

>>34983865
just lie and make up a story, you can be anyone or anything. It's like a little game.

>>34983865
I go to a korean barbershop where they always have spongebob or espn on tv

They know whiboi robot dont rike mek small talk

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>not getting your mummy to cut your hair or doing it yourself

Pathetic

>>34985419

no one believes you when you make shit up anon they just think youre autisitic

i once said i was an arcitect to someone whos husband was one and she started asking me questions and i had to tell her i made it up

most painful 3 minutes of my life as i made my way out the door

>>34985488
My mum cut my hair when I was little. It always looked terrible

>>34985650

your mum is bollocks

>>34985488

how old are you faggots that still live with mom?

>>34984244
It is derived from latin, dipshit.

barba = beard

Because they do hair & beard.

I just respond to the first couple of questions and then sit there quietly. I haven't gone in a whole though, growing my hair long

>>34983865

>Been going to the same barbershop for 2.5 years now
>Make small talk sometime, don't talk during others
>No one cares, the atmosphere in barbershops is chill as fuck anyways
>Caring enough about small talk for a haircut that it prevents you from looking like a new man

Social anxiety or not, either learn to cut your own hair or go to a barber you beta.

>>34984460

I googled your claim out of curiosity and found 0 evidence to support it just FYI.

>>34985827
I'm 31 and live with mom/dad

>>34985879
oh, my apologies i dont speak latin. You must surely tell im completely uneducated because who doesnt speak latin. You know i dont speak greek either i really am /philistine/

>>34984631
Srsly dude wtf is your fucking problem
You make a tyread about it wvery day and getvdozens of replies. Either you know now or youre too autistic to ever get it. Kys

>>34986008
yuropoors, "ladies" and gentlemen

>>34983865
found a barber that doesn't talk to me

just be short as fuck with them and they wont talk to you. then leave a big tip.

>>34986011
I think you mistake me for someone else. I never made a thread about haircuts and I never even saw one.

>>34985646
>I had to tell her i made it up
>as I made my way out the door
holy shit this is fucking golden.
this is beyond autistic, im sorry you did that but holy shit is it funny.

>>34986277

i still feel physical pain whenever i relive it in my head

her look was like that of curiosity and second hand embarrassment

????

If I start talking she will surely fuck up, I'll let her focus unless she's shaving then I'll say something but I'm usually on my phone

>>34983994
Or grow some balls and interact with other people like a normal person

>>34984582
This, only one makes genetic questions like how' uni going? The others I've been to don't talk at all

>>34983865
My stylists never ask any questions. I just kick back and relax. Love getting my hair cut, just enjoy the sensation of it. The feeling of the scissors, the warmth of the electric razor. It's wonderful.

>>34983991
This. If she tries to speak, I can't understand a fucking word she says. Why do they even try communicating if I don't even understand a single word. On the other hand though, I don't have to converse what so ever.

Also, even those barbers who actually know english don't really converse with you at all. They will focus on cutting your hair and thag is it.

Just wait until he/she starts talking to you. You might start off ok in the conversation. But 30 seconds in you'll slip. You'll stutter, become tongue-tied, or hit a mental block mid-speach. Then it will happen again.

I just make up an elaborate fantasy so I have something to talk about. It's fun to gauge their reaction.

Sometimes I'm an endocrinologist or a young MD doing an oncology residency. One time I was an intellectual property attorney. It's fun to watch their pussies get a little wet when I mention it; you can see their demeanor change instantaneously. I'm an average looking guy but it usually results in a pair of tits resting on my shoulder or against my head and fingers running through my hair intimately. They eventually always ask at some point whether I'm married. Got a little card with a handwritten phonenumber once.

I always put enough thought into the backstory for it to be convincing, and I know enough about each profession to talk about it if she happens to know about it or know someone in it. In spite of what you say about women around here it's always the ones with boyfriends or husbands who show the least interest, although they'll sometimes rattle off a little list of accomplishments/achievements of their SO to make him seem like less of a loser by comparison.

I don't talk to my barber. I say hello and the polite things and tell him how I want my hair, but I'm quiet most of the time. He may think I'm autistic but I don't care, I'm paying for a service and it works for me as long as I get it.

>>34987916
Damn, I guess I should move into a city then

I'm great at telling jokes, insults and making shit up on the fly, but I can't relate to people or form significant friendships unless they're out of some kind of mutual pragmatic necessity, and even then they often fade away

And since everyone knows me here and I'm incapable of going beyond first impressions and small talk, they know that beyond my good jokes and stories that everyone compliments me for I'm basically just a loser who sits at home, so I can't put them into any use.

>another trip to the barber's
>another $45 down the drain
i hate life

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>>34987241

after no human contact for months it almost puts me to sleep its so comforting

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>>34987916

one time i said i was a PHD mathematician

when the receipt was printed i added 4 bucks for tip and only added 3 to the total

she pointed this out and instead of admitting my mistake i just kept arguing and trying to convince her that 4+12 was 15.


eventually just laughed at her nervously and left

>>34989174
>>34989174

ahahahahAHAHhahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHA

AGAAHAHAHAHAHA
FUCK ME

WHY

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>>34989174

dude why. i felt that one in my bones dude.

OP DONT GO, i just got my shit justed and have to out tommorow too. its far too fucking short and i look terrible.

>>34985433
I went to a Korean hairdresser and she tried to make small talk. It's the worst of both a white and Asian hairdresser. She talks and she's hard to understand.

>>34989711

too late i just got back and im fucked

she chatted to her coworker the entire time and i have a hug gouge right on top of my head and its so fucking short i look like i have downs (more than usual)

wish i heeded your warning

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>>34991090


just took a picture you can kinda see the gouge on top

but look at the fucking bangs she gave me

why did i go

>>34991201

it looks like half your hair is 2 inches longer than the rest HAHAHA

>>34983865
My barber has been cutting my hair for like a decade, and he's known me since I was a kid.
Thankfully he understands me enough at this point to know I'm not much of a talker, though I'm comfortable around him enough for conversation.

Most of the time the other barbers are talking about sports or w/e with other customers so I don't have to say anything. If we;re alone he'll just turn on music while he cuts me

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>>34983865
I haven't had a haircut since 2011, that's how I avoid the anxiety of sitting in a barber's torture chair.


And no I'm not an autist cuck who cuts his own hair either

>>34984054
>long, it just poofs up

>long

>poofs up

Hairlet please

>>34991201
s h a v e i t

bro your hair is fucked just start over

>>34983865
>having to make smalltalk for 20 minutes
If it doesn't happen naturally, don't force it. Do you think your hairdresser likes having pointless smalltalk with strangers for an entire 8 hour (or more) day, 20 minutes at a time?

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>>34991201
no fucking way this is real

>>34991341

i cant i shaved it once and ppl literally LITERALLY thought i was retarded

had a women ask me at a supermarket where my "guardian" was

im not even fucking kidding

>>34983865
I just have an old barber who knows I don't like small talk, so I just talk to him in the beginning to tell him what cut I want, then at the end to pay him and say thanks. It works pretty well desu.

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>>34991201
Sweet Jesus your fucking head

>>34991380
lol fuck off nobody cares fuck you bro go away

fuk u

>>34991201
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IyQQc6kB9Zc

>>34991392
>op asks a question
>I answer it
>random fag spergs out on me

k

>>34991415
Don't bother replying to me, filth

>>34991425
lol, why are you so mad at me? I was just answering op

>>34991363
Post pics for proof
Oreganiolo

>>34991461

i dont have a pic of me bald nor am i ever shaving my head again

looked like a shittyly mad practical effect monster from a movie

the only time i ever talk to my barber is when i ask a question when she asks if i want it feathered like what does that mean. questions are something even the most awkward human beings can do

also recently i learnt that you have to tip your hairdresser

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>>34991201

i wouldnt go out for a long, long time anon

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>>34991201
Thread ruiner here to ruin the thread.

>>34991590

lol surprised it took so long

but still fuck you

>>34983865
I get cut by a guy, makes it a lot less difficult to speak. Always by the same one too so I build up familiarity with him.

>>34991936
why are you afraid to talk to girls?

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mfw I need testerone

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>>34984537
>barber sharp
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA *WHEEZE* HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

i started cutting it myself.

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screw the barber and go do a buzz cut or self hair cut

I wish I learned sooner that no one really cares about your hairstyle especially if you're a robot and not part of some fashion group. As long as it isn't caveman hair anything will pass.

>>34983865
Keep your eyes shut and pretend to (or actually) doze off.

>>34992323

that really wasnt funny at all, certainly not funny enough for that horrid post of yours

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>>34993953
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA *WHEEZE* HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

>>34984118
same over here. just try to find the bald guy or a beautiful girl sit down and let them do the work.