>parents left the house for a meal last night >sister out

Got what you deserve fag

>>34966034
haha faggot BTFO

>>34966034
>showered, lubed up and started slowly stretching my anus with two fingers
>inches away from pounding the shitoris

kind of confused about what you are trying to do here? more details?

>>34966034
This is Gods way of punishing you fags for your degeneracy.

>>34966088
I was trying to give myself a prostate orgasm by stimulating my shitoris. But I think I jabbed too hard and burst a blood vessel or something. I'm real fucking scared right now.

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>>34966034
AHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA GET REKT FAGGOT

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By all level of impossibilities, the universe spun itself into existence... and this is what's going on.

That's just your period, anon, it happens to everybody. It's normal.

>>34966034
Go to the doctor m8

origf

OP here I accept the jokes being made but please does anyone have any advice? Gaybots? I'm gonna post this on /lgbt/ too otherwise. I haven't broken wind for hours since it causes the wound to re-open and now my stomach is absolutely aching from the trapped air.

>>34966186
go and get it checked out

>>34966121
maybe you have an anal fissure

>>34966186
Well, my guess is you perforated your colon. You will have to go to the doctor and be honest.

>>34966222
>>34966172
No friggin way! That's the last thing I'm gonna do. Plus my mom works on the reception desk at the doctors office so she'll know I've been there.

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>>34966186
>does anyone have any advice?

yea stop being a gay faggot

>>34966245
It is life threatening, and you can die in the tear in your colon is big enough. You tried to stretch your colon and it tore, you need to go to a doctor.

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>>34966121
>>34966034
the inside of your intestinal tract is about as thin as wet tissue paper. buttplay has the potential to fuck your shit up big time if you do it wrong

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You are going to die if you don't get this fixed, or at least contract some horrible infection. Just tell your mom you woke up like that and need to go to a hospital.

>>34966121
>>34966034
What were you violating your ass with? Surely it must have been something more formidable than fingers

>>34966034
Pics or it didnt happen you butt toying homo

>>34966245
call an ambulance then if what you've written is true this is like 3 times a medical emergency you friggin idiot

>"Doc, I had a huge dinner the other day and I was constipated for a long time. Finally took a shit and I think I actually tore my asshole."

There, he won't inquire any more than that. Problem solved

>>34966254
FUCK YOU AND THE WILD FAGGOT

>>34966186
Dude just say this shit all happened when you took a shit, they'll believe you, no need to tell them about your assturbation.

>>34966245
worst cases: you need anal surgery or some stiches
best case: it will heal without anything but just hurt for a while

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>>34966034
I have been through something like this, but it was not that extreme, and it only happened one time with a pen because I was a curious little retard, I am otherwise straight.

The pain is mostly emotional shock and the bleeding will cease after few days. You ruptured something probably, and assholes are sensitive, they even tend to bleed if you wipe it with toilet paper too much.

Just calm the fuck down, you are not going to die. Just learn from this and don't do it again.

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>>34966434
>assturbation

Hahahahahhahahahaha
God I hope this is true

>>34966034
Invest in a dildo, dummy.

>>34966186

>>34966334
This.

>>34966439
>but just hurt for a while
>butt just hurt for a while.

jesus dude im sorry, like 5 years ago i stuck a hairbrush in my ass (handle part) and pulled it out and it had shit and blood on the tip and that made me panic but this is an entriely different story.

i suggest telling your parents that you were constipated and strained and them something happened when wiping and go to the doctor

>>34966453
>shitoris
>assturbation

>>34966034
Um, have you tried going to the hospital? Won't you get sepsis with a wound literally inside your ass? I've heard just smearing shit on a wound outside the ass increases the chances of infection by 600%.

>>34966451
also, the golden rule for medical attention is that if you start feeling worse, you need to get some medical attention, but if you start to feel better over time, no matter how long time over, but better each hour, each day, you just have to suffer though and don't need medical attention

also, doctors always see retards doing stupid shit to their bodies, don't think you will surprise them

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>>34966034
Do you now understand that what you've been doing is unnatural sonny? Pray the gay away and fap normally instead.

>>34966434
>they'll believe you
they'll say they believe you*

>>34966168
This.
Its just a boiperiod out of your boipussy.

Hope you die you degenerate.

>>34966341
It was just my fingers, but I admit that I was really drilling myself and moaning like a bitch. I was thinking of how hot it was when a guy makes a girl squirt and was pretending that I was both a guy (hand) and a girl (asspussy) forcing myself to "squirt" ironically. That's when I felt that sharp sudden pain.

>>34966593
Haha fuck man "boiperiod" this is to much

>>34966617
Go to a hospital for fuck sake

There is a very likely chance you will get a horrendously painful infection and probably die if you keep going like this with zero medical attention

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>>34966617
i was a fag like you, its a phase. get over it. i still have 3 dildos & remember that smoking weed makes you gay.

>>34966492
then how come I don't get sepsis from wiping too much to the point where my ass bleeds? There is surely shit getting into the wound

I also used to do shit like this, but when I tore my ass for the second time I just said fuck it and stopped doing stupid shit like that.

>>34966034

Dude just go to the doctor/hospital...they've seen it all before. It's not like you got anything weird or funny stuck up there.

>>34966783
A slightly bloody anus isn't the same as a rectum that's damaged enough to soak a towel with blood

>>34966683
>infection
it's not like he touched a public toilet seat, public staircase railing and immediately came home and assturbated without ever washing his hands

I think he'll be fine, but people often need to feel pain to get remainded to not do stupid shit again.

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>>34966617
a good excuse dear op would be that you cleaned your ass too hard after a fat shit & bursted something inside...that way your faggotary will go unnoticed

>>34966755
>smoking weed makes you gay
haven't heard this meme
can you elaborate pretty pleas?

>>34966854
The inside of his ass has a big enough open wound that it soaked his entire mattress with blood. Chances are that a wound that severe in a place filled with so much literal shit, it's going to get infected.

>>34966882
try smoke weed and google Jesse Starr

thank me later & c u on grindr

>>34966854
you're retarded, he's talking about shit getting into his bloodstream which will undoubtedly happen

you just tore your colon retard. just pray to kek that you didnt perforate it, if you did you'll have to shit in a bag for the rest of your life.

>>34966186
Go to the doctor you stupid fuck.

You've probably lost a lot of blood.

>>34966034
You need to go to the doctors bro. tell them you were taking a shit and blood just started pouring out.

*BRRAAAAA- FLLLURRP*

I remember someone died from this but he was taking it from his favorite horse.

Hahaha but OP you fucked up big time. Westboro was right, God does hate fags.

>>34966309
>not flipping butterfly knives

what are you a faggot?

Just say you were really constipated and you must've forced too hard whilst having a shit.

Yup, thats cancer. And no, im not joking. I googled it and thats literally all that came up.
Rip , faggot. You got what you deserved